(no subject)
SECOND TO LAST BATCH.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. cloooosed, I have to run out the door to work so notifications will come later, but people from this batch are more than free to reveal and set stuff up and yes. ♥
Character: Kamijou Hiroki
Series: Junjou Romantica
Character Age: 29
Job: Visiting Lecturer on Undead Literature
Canon: Junjou Romantica consists of three mostly separate storylines, each centered around the relationship of a particular couple. Kamijou Hiroki is one of the leads of the ‘Junjou Egoist’ plot, and when he fled a disastrous attempted seduction of his childhood best friend to sulk in a park, the last thing he expected to find was the real love of his life. Cue about six years of more dramatic rom-com communication mishaps and emotional breakdowns than you can shake a stick at.
Hiroki prides himself on being calm and collected, and therefore usually comes across as the opposite - over-serious, grouchy and extremely sensitive. He yells and has a tendency to talk to himself when he’s flustered (which is often), and is so aggressive and passionate about his work that his students call him “Demon Kamijou” - interpreting a story from the wrong perspective in his class is a good way to get an eraser between the eyes. But as much as he protests, he’s a genuine, caring young man who just wants everyone to respect him and his literature.
Sample Post:
This isn’t exactly what I was expecting when I signed on to do a lecture series in America. From the moment I arrived I have been harassed and insulted. The call for papers called it the Conference On Undead Dialogues - nobody said there were going to be actual zombies involved! And when I finally made it through the swamp and found the lecture hall, they had also changed the name of my paper. It was supposed to be ‘Queering the Vampire in Modern Japan’ but now it’s listed as ‘I Vant To Suck Your...’ T-that sort of thing isn’t- it’s too blunt! I’m not giving a lecture on that and I don’t care how many arms I have to twist off!
And that's not even half of it! I mean, most students are brainless deadbeats, right? But not this literally. These guys are falling all over themselves! I tried to lead a discussion but they couldn’t identify simple themes, they don’t even know what a metaphor is and they have been vandalizing the books. I may not be an expert on British literature but any idiot can see that "scenes of bone-crunching zombie mayhem" don't belong in 'Pride and Prejudice'! …Although I admit I’m not as sure about the intrinsic literary value of ‘How To Survive The Zombie Apocalypse'. They really seem to have a grudge against that one, judging by the stains. But that’s beside the point! …And that student’s arm is beside his book-bag. Put that back in its socket or I’ll pick it up and beat you with it, you wool for- Gah! That’s disgusting! Ordinary students I can handle but I didn’t sign up for this. I’m just going to start backing out slowly and hope none of them notice. They can find someone else to teach this class of the damned!
Keep your cool, Kamijou. Are you going to let a horde of the ravening undead overcome your man’s pride? …W-well, if I have to hide, at least I found a library. Books are always comforting. Or they used to be. I’m a little worried about the ones here. I think a Murakami tried to feel me up a few minutes ago and the dictionaries seem to be getting, ah, restless. And what’s with these weird public awareness signs? ‘Remember Your Camp Rules! No’ um, ah - ‘No sex, especially in or with the library!’ What the hell is that supposed to mean? T-that was one time! Ah… I’m really getting out of control. Alright, no more complaining. I’m going to crawl out from under this table and march right out that door! Those goons will be sorry they ever messed with me! Just let me shove this stack of books over here… Wait, this one's different from the others-
D-damn it, graphic novel or not, that kind of image just isn't right! I don’t usually say things like this but think of the children!
Poll Vote!
Name: Vlad Masters (aka Plasmius)
Canon: Danny Phantom
Age: In his 40s
Job: Camp Football Coach
Canon: Danny Fenton’s parents are obsessed with ghosts - so obsessed that they try to build a bridge between our world and the Ghost Zone. Unfortunately, when trying to get the portal working Danny accidentally becomes fused with a ghost and gains ghostly super powers as a result. It works for him, but not everyone would take the gift of being able to turn invisible and walk through walls and use it for good. Take Vlad Masters, who, since his unfortunate ghost-related accident years before at the hands of Danny's father, has somehow managed to become fabulously wealthy and politically influential. Nothing suspicious about that at all.
Vlad Masters is your typical evil genius villain. You know the kind; full of witty insults, evil schemes and has an ego far larger than he needs. There are only three things he’s ever been denied in life: his love for Danny's mother, his revenge on Danny's father and the Green Bay Packers (all of which he is obsessed with). Unfortunately he isn't quite charismatic enough to be a threat to his love interest's marriage, he tends to blurt out plans for vengeance before he executes them and Green Bay just won't sell him the team. Still, he has enough skill to become mayor and he's a snappy dresser.
Sample Post:
That’s it, that’s it, stop the practice! That was terrible, horrible, absolutely wretched. Have any of you even seen a football before? You are, without a doubt, the least athletic team I have ever been a part of; and that includes my time on the debate team in college. Save the pathetic excuses, being half dead shouldn’t stop you from anything. I know plenty of completely dead people who have much more going on than all of you. And they don’t give me a word of complaint about being told what to do.
How am I supposed to keep a decent cover when you can’t even put up the hint of a good game? I’m not asking for a winning season, but people are going to question a coach who can’t keep his team physically together long enough to get through a quarter. Oh, don't look so shocked. Do you really think I went to the trouble to have myself hired at the world's one and only trans-dimensional summer camp just to play babysitter to a bunch of mindless zombies?
You should also know that being a coach wasn't my first choice when I applied here, but out of all the jobs they had open, this one fit my many talents best without being too time consuming. I would have much preferred to be a team manager, or even better, an owner. But sometimes we have to take a hit or two in order to get what we want. That's a lesson you all might want to pick up on as well. For now I'm happy to play the lesser role of a coach so long as I get some valuable free time. And it allows me to scout potential talent for the Packers from a pool of the best and strongest who obviously aren't represented here while I'm at it. Win win.
To that end, it's obvious the drills we've been running aren't making any difference in your play, so huddle up. At this point I've made it clear that I'm serious about getting a half decent game out of you lot. I've never been good at inspirational speeches, and I'm not going to subject you to an attempt. But just because I'm not one for inspiration, doesn't mean I'm not good at motivation. Your motivation is to get up and play like a team, because if you don't I'm going to reduce you to a fine mist of greenish-gray vapor. Are we clear? Good. Now we'll start your training by getting a new jug of Gatorade, you need all the help you can get. And don't you dare try to pour it over me. I may be your coach but I won't stand for something so undignified. Did you hear what I just said?
Oh, butter biscuits!
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Maddie Fenton
Series: Danny Phantom
Age: Forty-something
Job: Paranormal Defense Teacher
Canon: Let's say that you live in a world where ghosts aren't only real, but where they break out of their own world to attack humans on a regular basis. Who you gonna call?
Probably not Maddie Fenton and her husband Jack. The two have dedicated their lives to ghost-hunting and have come up with many useful anti-ghost inventions, but are considered a joke even among their colleagues, in part because their dedication would better be described as obsession and mostly because Jack usually comes across as nothing more than a bubbling oaf. Although their children often wish that they'd do something less embarrassing with their lives, the Fenton's don't let what anyone else thinks bother them; they're doing what they love and fighting against creatures that they truly believe are all evil, and that's good enough for them.
Maddie is the more competent of the two. She's a strong fighter, capable of both aiming a gun with expert accuracy and of using her skills as a ninth-degree black belt to kick ghostly butt up close and personal. Beyond that she's a technological genius, though that technology being paranormal-related keeps her from getting much recognition for it. Her mind's scientific bent makes her marginally less threatening to the ghosts they face than her husband, but only because she'd rather study and then dissect them instead of eliminating them outright. And that preference isn't strong enough to make her hold back in the middle of a fight. She's usually a sensible woman, but there are times when her obsession with ghost-fighting overwhelms her rational mind. For instance, she carries a ton of anti-ghost and survival equipment, but doesn't think to spare a little space for a cell phone to call for help if she ever needs it because "you can't fight ghosts with a cell phone, silly!"
There is more to her than just the ghost obsession, of course, She's a doting wife and mother, who becomes even more dangerous than usual if anyone dares to threaten her family. She very optimistic, usually staying bright and cheerful through just about anything, although when the situation warrants it she can pull out deadpan sarcasm or action-movie toughness. And she's an inventor of delicious cookie recipes to boot!
Sample Entry:
Welcome to Camp Fenton Youth Defenders, kids! I can't tell you all how thrilled I am that we've gotten this camp up and running! To think, just a few years ago we were laughed out of the bank when we first tried to get funding for it because they thought no parent in their right mind would send their children to learn how to fight ghosts. And now look at how many of you came! What a difference a sudden relentless stream of ghost attacks makes!
Now, I know some of you might be thinking that you don't need how to defend yourself against specters, spooks, and other supernatural apparitions. Some of you might even think that there's something attractive about them! I'm not entirely behind the times, I've seen the way so many of you young girls fawn over that vampire boy who's badly in need of a haircut. Don't tell my husband, but I can even understand how you feel. When I was just a girl it may have been a starman waiting in the sky that tickled my fancy and not the lurking undead, but they have one thing in common; they're paranormal creatures and not to be trusted! It doesn't matter how good they look in skintight jumpsuits.
Which brings us to rule number one that every good ghost hunter must learn; never attempt to befriend them! It seems like every time there's a large-scale spectral outbreak somebody thinks they've found the next Casper, or a pet that will never need to be sent away to a big farm too far out in the country to ever visit where they can run around chasing chickens all day. I know that having a friend who can slip you through the walls of the movie theater or turn you invisible so you listen in on what people really of you might be tempting to kids your age--although I'd hope that anyone who signed up to be a Youth Defender would know better than to steal or spy on living humans!--but you need to ask yourself one important thing: will free movies really be worth it when your new friend tries to devour your youth to retain their corporal form, or to steal your body so they can experience mortal life? Of course not!
I'm not going to say that staying wary will be enough to keep a spook away once it's set its teeth on you, but that just leads to rule number two! Shoot first, learn motivations later. You'll have plenty of time to study their methods once you have them safely contained. Luckily they've already prepared more than enough targets for all of you to practice this rule on! Although they'll work fine while you're learning basic self-defense techniques and how to aim, there's something you'll need to remember kids: when you find yourself face to face with an actual ghost it will be less tangible, much faster, and it likely won't actually look like a rotting corpse even if people consider them undead. Now, watch how I do it everyone! I just raise my gun, line up my sights, and...
Oh, now this won't do at all! How can you children expect to learn anything when your targets explode at the first blast from an ecto-gun? I suppose you should all head for the showers to wash off the goo while I try to work out a solution for this problem. Just don't forget, this afternoon we'll have your first lesson on how to track ghosts in any environment. Be ready to get muddy!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Othello Farrel
Series: Akuma no Ororon
Age: Over one hundred, but looks around 25
Job: Big Brother Program Coordinator (CFUD Branch)
Canon: Boy meets girl. Boy loves girl. Boy promises to stay with girl forever even though the world keeps trying to tear them apart. Yes, he watches her while she sleeps and no, this isn’t a Twilight app. Akuma no Ororon follows Ororon, the devil king, and Chiaki, the daughter of an angel, as they fight for their love and kill a ton of people in the process. Totally adorable, right? Once it’s discovered that Ororon is not taking care of his royal duties it isn’t long before all Hell breaks loose, literally. Heaven, Hell and everything in between is intent on either having his head or dragging him back to the throne. One such pursuer is Ororon’s older brother Othello, the fifth prince.
Othello, the most eccentric playboy in the royal family, at least according to the tabloids, came to Earth after his younger brother in order to avoid having to take the throne himself. Othello is a smooth, charming and flirtatious man. However, despite this friendly demeanor, he does have his serious moments and is capable of great cruelty. And as the general of the Seiryu army, he is definitely a force to be reckoned with. This curious devil is accustomed to being obeyed and when he isn’t obeyed then others suffer. So put on your listening ears, okay~? Unless of course you're interested in some intensive training. His program is quite popular among the pretty young boys.
Sample Entry:
Well, this is certainly a first. I’ve never seen such a creature as the one called “Marcy” and, considering the sights one can see back home, that is saying quite a bit. If you ask me though, I don’t see what everyone is in such a tizzy about, not that I’m complaining. It’s amusing to see everyone get so upset over something so silly. You’d think a few creepy crawlies were the end of the world by the way these campers are reacting. To be fair, it wouldn’t hurt for something to be done about the smell, but this place does have a certain charm. Then again, that might just be because I have a weakness for unusual things.
Really though, I have to wonder where my little brother has led us now. Come out, come out wherever you are, Ororon! Big brother is here to look after you, so be good and come greet me properly. I came all this way and have yet to see hide or hair of him. Luckily I’m a very kind and forgiving older brother, so I’ll let it slide this once. I’ll just have to find some other way to keep myself amused for now. It would certainly be interesting to chat with the foliage and have it actually talk right back. However, there are plenty of lovely companions here in the flesh, in the rotting flesh anyways, and it would be rude to engage a plant instead of them. A gentleman should never let a lady be a wallflower, even if she is undead.
These ladies don’t look very ladylike at all though. If you ask me, they look very hungry for male….attention. Ha ha ha, they really are man eaters, aren’t they! What with those pesky bans, no one can really blame them. Unfortunately for them, my taste for the unusual doesn’t go that far. Sorry ladies, but I’m sure someone else will be able to properly appreciate the amount of time you spent arranging your remaining limbs just so. Now if you could kindly remove those hands before I must remove them for you? I’m sure after having lost your life that you’d like to hold on to the rotting shell you call a body at least. It’s nothing worth speaking about, but it’s all you have left, isn’t it? I appreciate it. Now that we’re acquainted, you haven’t happened to see a young man with three moles under his left eye, have you? No?
It seems I was wrong about my brother being here, and while this has proved to be an entertaining trip, I am a very busy man. I hope the Director will accept my sincere apology, but I’m going to have to cut this visit short. I’m sure that bit I heard about being stuck is just a mistake, not to mention I already have a job and a little brother of my own to take care of. She seems like an intelligent woman, and any intelligent person would know better than to hold a busy man such as myself here against his will. I’ll talk to her about it and get this whole thing straightened out. As long as she fixes this little barrier problem, I see no reason to hold this slip-up against her.
After all…mistakes happen ♥
Poll Vote!
Character: Simone Bradley
Series: Loving Annabelle
Character Age: 40
Job idea: Poetry Teacher
Canon: When the titular troublemaking daughter of a famous senator gets sent to an all-girl's Catholic school, she comes under the care of literature and French teacher Simone Bradley. Miss Bradley is the teacher everyone wants to do--even the headmaster, who happens to be her aunt. Simone is charged with getting Annabelle to follow the rules. But Simone quickly finds herself preoccupied with trying not to fall in love with this rambunctious underage student.
In the classroom, Simone is pretty much what you would expect from a Catholic schoolmarm: stern, composed and aware of every rule you're breaking. But she's actually a gentle, accommodating soul, unflappable by the strange quirks of her students but easily flustered when things start to get out of her control. It follows that outside the classroom, her gentle nature means she has no control over her life; without the authority of her position, she spends a lot of time starting to say something, then changing her mind because there's just no appropriate way to respond. And, of course, she easily folds to the whims of others.
Sample Post:
Good morning, class. My name is Miss Bradley. Miss Sayre and I recently sat down together for dinner, and while I was eating her--pie, class. Apple pie, not whatever you're snickering about. It was quite delicious, and I would appreciate it if you would all be so mature as to stop giggling now so that we can get on with class. Anyway, she asked me to join this year's staff for the holiday season to teach you the joys of poetry. You may have heard the saying "a picture is worth a thousand words." Well, a poem is just a picture that has been painted with words. It's art. A poet carefully selects each word so that as the audience reads the piece, they see the exact image he had in mind when he put pen to paper. Of course, there's a world of difference between the imagery of a poet's mind and a zombie's doodle of a brain in the margin of her textbook. I appreciate your artistic talent, Miss Aargh, but perhaps you had best save your enthusiasm for a visit to the Arts and Crafts hut.
Now, if you're quite ready to concentrate on our lesson, we will begin by reading Robert Herrick's "The Vine."
I dream'd this mortal part of mine
Was Metamorphoz'd to a Vine;
Which crawling one and every way,
Enthrall'd my dainty Lucia.
Let's stop here for a moment. Miss Marcy, what do you think Herrick is trying to show us, here? ...Wait--I--Marcy, what makes you think it's about tentacle rape? The narrator is dreaming that his body is actually a plant, stretching out and holding the attention of the object of his...affection. It's a realization about how one may change to better fulfill the needs of another.
No, look, there's no right or wrong. You do not need to demonstrate for the class how--Marcy! So long as this class is in session, you will behave appropriately and keep your tentacles to yourself. I can't even begin to count how many times you've violated the rules today! I'm going to have to ask you stay after class, so we may discuss your deviations--including the state of your clothing. Believe me, I know how it feels to want to set yourself apart from your peers, and I know that a Catholic schoolgirl uniform is hardly popular among people your age. You want to show that you aren't just part of the crowd. But uniforms really do have a good purpose--they keep the other students from being distracted by anything...unusual. For the moment, let's just say that in the future, you should remember that your skirt should cover at least to your mid-thigh...or. Well, if you stand up straight, the tips of your upper-most tentacles should touch the hem of your skirt. ...Your skirt, Marcy. Not mine.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Lung Tien Lien
Series: Temeraire
Age: in her 30s
Job: Revenge Etiquette Advisor
Canon: You yawned through at least a few parts of history class, didn't you? I guess you never realized was that your textbook needed a few GIGANTIC, SENTIENT DRAGONS.
Naomi Novik set out to remedy this lack with a work of historical fiction, starring Temeraire and his captain Laurence fighting for Britain during the Napoleonic wars. Temeraire should never have been in Britain in the first place - his egg was originally from China, a gift of the rarest Celestial breed from China to France's Emperor. During his many adventures, his elevated status in his homeland led him to meet Lung Tien Lien, his cousin and rival, during a mission meant to establish China's policy regarding his service with England.
Lien is another Celestial, a distinction of birth which should have led to her great status and popularity in China, as well as the companionship of one of the Imperial family. Unfortunately, she was "born in mourning colors" - an albino - and was held to be bad luck. Her companion, Prince Yongxing, rendered himself ineligible for the throne by choosing her, and eventually began scheming to get it back. Lien's lonely though highly ceremonial life was defined by Yongxing's hopes and dreams, so when his treasonous plot against his family, Laurence, and Temeraire resulted in his death, she swore vengeance against them and allied herself with Napoleon.
Proud, haughty, and disdainful of bad manners, Lien considers service her due and a bitter feud to the death no excuse to act uncivilized. If her lifetime of isolation and guilt over her "bad luck"'s effect on Yongxing left her with insecurities, she hides them very deeply.
Sample Entry:
It is with the greatest of pleasure that I arrive here today; the need for discussion between the states for which we are acting as representatives has become deeply necessary as this war of the Continent progresses, and I am glad to assist my adoptive nation in beginning it. Pray do not be alarmed; I assure you that his Majesty's aim in selecting me as ambassador was not to intimidate you, no matter how rightfully respectful of the Empire's growing influence as you may be, but merely to represent the new awareness of dragons' proper place in society that France's new order seeks to foster. As we winged citizens serve as the breath of the Empire, your foreign trade must serve as her blood for the duration of this war with England, whose ships seek to blockade our own. His Majesty cannot but be sensible of the importance of a good relationship with your colonies, to which France lent so much aid in your late struggles for liberty... and we cannot show our commitment to that relationship if you do not come back. Are all the officials of this land so poor-spirited in the face of dragons, then? How incivil.
I see no reason for either such rudeness or such squalor; indeed, no reason at all. The simple facts of the marshiness of the ground here and the general undesirability of the setting can be of no consequence, not when there are so many hands lying in idleness; even those lying on the ground can be pressed to more useful purposes than they serve at present. Surely even such a barbaric place cannot advocate leaving severed limbs to putrefy after a battle! It does the soil less good than an acceptable fertilizer would; remove them at once. It is easy to see why France saw fit to sell this land for such a ridiculous sum, even if ready capital was necessary for the war effort - such conduct from lesser persons is not fitting for either citizens of the Empire, or neighbors. Such ungrateful persons would have done better to continue paying tribute to the poison-traders of Britain, though I'd entertained hopes that your defection arose from a rather better frame of mind; but it is not as if these Western lands have obeyed decency or decorum in any other sense. My hopes were too high.
I will wait here for the presence of one E. Sayre, the official the Emperor has had contact with; if you wish to have access to these hovels with any ease, I believe someone must find him in short order. If there is anyone of distinction in this settlement, they may wish to inform this water-dwelling creature that I do not associate with any who might try to speak with me without habits of proper hygiene; if she wishes to wash the impurities of her current place of residence from her hide and adopt a more pleasing tone of address, I might accept an introduction, but not before. There is a dignity that a Celestial must uphold, one must understand; I would hesitate to interrupt her speech, as it is only a small honor to count myself among their number, but I must put forward that after centuries of development, they are quite possibly the most advanced breed of dragons the world has seen; the best dragons, that is to say, of all time.
Of all time.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Koganei Keitarou
Series: The Weatherman is My Lover
Age: 25
Job: Official "Straight" Man
Canon: Chou Hayaoki TV (Super Early Morning TV) has a rather eccentric cast and crew, but because of this it's extremely popular -- even though it airs at 4 AM. The stars of the show are Koganei Keitarou, a calm, serious, and by-the-book newscaster, and Amasawa Chitose, a bright, perky, and outwardly very silly weatherfairyman. Chitose's habit of incessantly teasing Koganei and their sharply contrasting natures keep the viewers on the edge of their seats, eagerly waiting for Koganei's patience to find its end and for him to reprimand Chitose on air. Yet despite their vast differences, Koganei and Chitose eventually find themselves drawn in a romantic relationship.
Stoic, sober, and straight-laced. These are the sort of things most people think of when they first get to know Koganei and they're really not far off the mark. This is the full extent of Koganei's apparent character and with his closed nature and many people considering his personality 'bad' most people don't bother to get to know him better. But when someone does come to understand him on more than a surface level, and vice versa of course, they tend to discover that while serious and not-very-fun on the job, he can still be friendly and playful while not working and does have a clever, devious side as well, even if he find little reason to put it to use. He plays the straight man to Chitose and displays a surprising amount of patience while on air, even if he'll yell at his coworkers once the camera's stopped rolling.
Sample Post:
Sound test. Check, check. All clear? Good, good-- are those corpses running the camera? They're just zombies? The living dead? That isn't any better, we really shouldn't be-- well, no, I don't think the camera should just sit there, there needs to be someone running it. 'Zombies' just aren't the best choice. Can't we get someone else? ... Ah, well, if it's going to take too long that's fine. As long as they behave... Alright, give me the cue.
... Good morning, and thank you for tuning in. I'm Koganei Keitarou with the Camp News Network, reporting from the lake. We're here today looking into the sudden increase in the number of telepathic toucans living in and around the camp. Eye-witnesses report what's been described as 'an alarming number' of the creatures harassing campers and counselors alike, telling dirty jokes and demanding information about the squid in the lake and the zombies that populate the camp. Some witnesses believe that the increase in the number of toucans is connected to the abnormally large number of flying penises, which are said to be very delicious... The abnormally large number of flying... penises... seen migrating further south for the winter. A team from our station attempted to speak with some of the gorillas in the camp, but were chased off when the gorillas began to throw lawn chairs and one of the zombies at them.
In other news, there-- ... there appears to be an abrupt-- Quit that-- an abrupt-- Stop it whoever-- w-wait, is that-- why is there a squid--? I apologize, ladies and gentlemen, we're having some-- some difficulties, there appears to be-- No squid should be this big-- W-woah, wait! No, no, don't! I'm not a-- augh! No, no, no, put me down! No, not in the lake--! Auurghlesh!
... I-I apologize again, ladies and gentlemen, there was some-- interference caused by... the giant squid that lives in the lake.
This is Koganei Keitarou, reporting with your ... Camp Fuck You Die News.
All right, now that the camera is off... What were you thinking?! What on earth is this? What do you think you're doing? No one said anything about flying penises! That wasn't on the teleprompter before, either, quit changing the script! I don't care if it's more interesting, stop! No one watches the news to be entertained, they watch it to learn about the important events that are happening in the world around them. I'm being serious, don't -- you're not going to change it? Why not? Hey, hey, no! Don't turn the camera on, we're done! I-- just don't change it from now on! Please? We can't-- but....
... Fine. Fine! We'll do it your way, just-- just, get everything put away, we wouldn't want the squid to knock it over. I'm going to die if this keeps up.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. cloooosed, I have to run out the door to work so notifications will come later, but people from this batch are more than free to reveal and set stuff up and yes. ♥
Character: Kamijou Hiroki
Series: Junjou Romantica
Character Age: 29
Job: Visiting Lecturer on Undead Literature
Canon: Junjou Romantica consists of three mostly separate storylines, each centered around the relationship of a particular couple. Kamijou Hiroki is one of the leads of the ‘Junjou Egoist’ plot, and when he fled a disastrous attempted seduction of his childhood best friend to sulk in a park, the last thing he expected to find was the real love of his life. Cue about six years of more dramatic rom-com communication mishaps and emotional breakdowns than you can shake a stick at.
Hiroki prides himself on being calm and collected, and therefore usually comes across as the opposite - over-serious, grouchy and extremely sensitive. He yells and has a tendency to talk to himself when he’s flustered (which is often), and is so aggressive and passionate about his work that his students call him “Demon Kamijou” - interpreting a story from the wrong perspective in his class is a good way to get an eraser between the eyes. But as much as he protests, he’s a genuine, caring young man who just wants everyone to respect him and his literature.
Sample Post:
This isn’t exactly what I was expecting when I signed on to do a lecture series in America. From the moment I arrived I have been harassed and insulted. The call for papers called it the Conference On Undead Dialogues - nobody said there were going to be actual zombies involved! And when I finally made it through the swamp and found the lecture hall, they had also changed the name of my paper. It was supposed to be ‘Queering the Vampire in Modern Japan’ but now it’s listed as ‘I Vant To Suck Your...’ T-that sort of thing isn’t- it’s too blunt! I’m not giving a lecture on that and I don’t care how many arms I have to twist off!
And that's not even half of it! I mean, most students are brainless deadbeats, right? But not this literally. These guys are falling all over themselves! I tried to lead a discussion but they couldn’t identify simple themes, they don’t even know what a metaphor is and they have been vandalizing the books. I may not be an expert on British literature but any idiot can see that "scenes of bone-crunching zombie mayhem" don't belong in 'Pride and Prejudice'! …Although I admit I’m not as sure about the intrinsic literary value of ‘How To Survive The Zombie Apocalypse'. They really seem to have a grudge against that one, judging by the stains. But that’s beside the point! …And that student’s arm is beside his book-bag. Put that back in its socket or I’ll pick it up and beat you with it, you wool for- Gah! That’s disgusting! Ordinary students I can handle but I didn’t sign up for this. I’m just going to start backing out slowly and hope none of them notice. They can find someone else to teach this class of the damned!
Keep your cool, Kamijou. Are you going to let a horde of the ravening undead overcome your man’s pride? …W-well, if I have to hide, at least I found a library. Books are always comforting. Or they used to be. I’m a little worried about the ones here. I think a Murakami tried to feel me up a few minutes ago and the dictionaries seem to be getting, ah, restless. And what’s with these weird public awareness signs? ‘Remember Your Camp Rules! No’ um, ah - ‘No sex, especially in or with the library!’ What the hell is that supposed to mean? T-that was one time! Ah… I’m really getting out of control. Alright, no more complaining. I’m going to crawl out from under this table and march right out that door! Those goons will be sorry they ever messed with me! Just let me shove this stack of books over here… Wait, this one's different from the others-
D-damn it, graphic novel or not, that kind of image just isn't right! I don’t usually say things like this but think of the children!
Poll Vote!
Name: Vlad Masters (aka Plasmius)
Canon: Danny Phantom
Age: In his 40s
Job: Camp Football Coach
Canon: Danny Fenton’s parents are obsessed with ghosts - so obsessed that they try to build a bridge between our world and the Ghost Zone. Unfortunately, when trying to get the portal working Danny accidentally becomes fused with a ghost and gains ghostly super powers as a result. It works for him, but not everyone would take the gift of being able to turn invisible and walk through walls and use it for good. Take Vlad Masters, who, since his unfortunate ghost-related accident years before at the hands of Danny's father, has somehow managed to become fabulously wealthy and politically influential. Nothing suspicious about that at all.
Vlad Masters is your typical evil genius villain. You know the kind; full of witty insults, evil schemes and has an ego far larger than he needs. There are only three things he’s ever been denied in life: his love for Danny's mother, his revenge on Danny's father and the Green Bay Packers (all of which he is obsessed with). Unfortunately he isn't quite charismatic enough to be a threat to his love interest's marriage, he tends to blurt out plans for vengeance before he executes them and Green Bay just won't sell him the team. Still, he has enough skill to become mayor and he's a snappy dresser.
Sample Post:
That’s it, that’s it, stop the practice! That was terrible, horrible, absolutely wretched. Have any of you even seen a football before? You are, without a doubt, the least athletic team I have ever been a part of; and that includes my time on the debate team in college. Save the pathetic excuses, being half dead shouldn’t stop you from anything. I know plenty of completely dead people who have much more going on than all of you. And they don’t give me a word of complaint about being told what to do.
How am I supposed to keep a decent cover when you can’t even put up the hint of a good game? I’m not asking for a winning season, but people are going to question a coach who can’t keep his team physically together long enough to get through a quarter. Oh, don't look so shocked. Do you really think I went to the trouble to have myself hired at the world's one and only trans-dimensional summer camp just to play babysitter to a bunch of mindless zombies?
You should also know that being a coach wasn't my first choice when I applied here, but out of all the jobs they had open, this one fit my many talents best without being too time consuming. I would have much preferred to be a team manager, or even better, an owner. But sometimes we have to take a hit or two in order to get what we want. That's a lesson you all might want to pick up on as well. For now I'm happy to play the lesser role of a coach so long as I get some valuable free time. And it allows me to scout potential talent for the Packers from a pool of the best and strongest who obviously aren't represented here while I'm at it. Win win.
To that end, it's obvious the drills we've been running aren't making any difference in your play, so huddle up. At this point I've made it clear that I'm serious about getting a half decent game out of you lot. I've never been good at inspirational speeches, and I'm not going to subject you to an attempt. But just because I'm not one for inspiration, doesn't mean I'm not good at motivation. Your motivation is to get up and play like a team, because if you don't I'm going to reduce you to a fine mist of greenish-gray vapor. Are we clear? Good. Now we'll start your training by getting a new jug of Gatorade, you need all the help you can get. And don't you dare try to pour it over me. I may be your coach but I won't stand for something so undignified. Did you hear what I just said?
Oh, butter biscuits!
Poll Vote!
Character Name: Maddie Fenton
Series: Danny Phantom
Age: Forty-something
Job: Paranormal Defense Teacher
Canon: Let's say that you live in a world where ghosts aren't only real, but where they break out of their own world to attack humans on a regular basis. Who you gonna call?
Probably not Maddie Fenton and her husband Jack. The two have dedicated their lives to ghost-hunting and have come up with many useful anti-ghost inventions, but are considered a joke even among their colleagues, in part because their dedication would better be described as obsession and mostly because Jack usually comes across as nothing more than a bubbling oaf. Although their children often wish that they'd do something less embarrassing with their lives, the Fenton's don't let what anyone else thinks bother them; they're doing what they love and fighting against creatures that they truly believe are all evil, and that's good enough for them.
Maddie is the more competent of the two. She's a strong fighter, capable of both aiming a gun with expert accuracy and of using her skills as a ninth-degree black belt to kick ghostly butt up close and personal. Beyond that she's a technological genius, though that technology being paranormal-related keeps her from getting much recognition for it. Her mind's scientific bent makes her marginally less threatening to the ghosts they face than her husband, but only because she'd rather study and then dissect them instead of eliminating them outright. And that preference isn't strong enough to make her hold back in the middle of a fight. She's usually a sensible woman, but there are times when her obsession with ghost-fighting overwhelms her rational mind. For instance, she carries a ton of anti-ghost and survival equipment, but doesn't think to spare a little space for a cell phone to call for help if she ever needs it because "you can't fight ghosts with a cell phone, silly!"
There is more to her than just the ghost obsession, of course, She's a doting wife and mother, who becomes even more dangerous than usual if anyone dares to threaten her family. She very optimistic, usually staying bright and cheerful through just about anything, although when the situation warrants it she can pull out deadpan sarcasm or action-movie toughness. And she's an inventor of delicious cookie recipes to boot!
Sample Entry:
Welcome to Camp Fenton Youth Defenders, kids! I can't tell you all how thrilled I am that we've gotten this camp up and running! To think, just a few years ago we were laughed out of the bank when we first tried to get funding for it because they thought no parent in their right mind would send their children to learn how to fight ghosts. And now look at how many of you came! What a difference a sudden relentless stream of ghost attacks makes!
Now, I know some of you might be thinking that you don't need how to defend yourself against specters, spooks, and other supernatural apparitions. Some of you might even think that there's something attractive about them! I'm not entirely behind the times, I've seen the way so many of you young girls fawn over that vampire boy who's badly in need of a haircut. Don't tell my husband, but I can even understand how you feel. When I was just a girl it may have been a starman waiting in the sky that tickled my fancy and not the lurking undead, but they have one thing in common; they're paranormal creatures and not to be trusted! It doesn't matter how good they look in skintight jumpsuits.
Which brings us to rule number one that every good ghost hunter must learn; never attempt to befriend them! It seems like every time there's a large-scale spectral outbreak somebody thinks they've found the next Casper, or a pet that will never need to be sent away to a big farm too far out in the country to ever visit where they can run around chasing chickens all day. I know that having a friend who can slip you through the walls of the movie theater or turn you invisible so you listen in on what people really of you might be tempting to kids your age--although I'd hope that anyone who signed up to be a Youth Defender would know better than to steal or spy on living humans!--but you need to ask yourself one important thing: will free movies really be worth it when your new friend tries to devour your youth to retain their corporal form, or to steal your body so they can experience mortal life? Of course not!
I'm not going to say that staying wary will be enough to keep a spook away once it's set its teeth on you, but that just leads to rule number two! Shoot first, learn motivations later. You'll have plenty of time to study their methods once you have them safely contained. Luckily they've already prepared more than enough targets for all of you to practice this rule on! Although they'll work fine while you're learning basic self-defense techniques and how to aim, there's something you'll need to remember kids: when you find yourself face to face with an actual ghost it will be less tangible, much faster, and it likely won't actually look like a rotting corpse even if people consider them undead. Now, watch how I do it everyone! I just raise my gun, line up my sights, and...
Oh, now this won't do at all! How can you children expect to learn anything when your targets explode at the first blast from an ecto-gun? I suppose you should all head for the showers to wash off the goo while I try to work out a solution for this problem. Just don't forget, this afternoon we'll have your first lesson on how to track ghosts in any environment. Be ready to get muddy!
Poll Vote!
Character name: Othello Farrel
Series: Akuma no Ororon
Age: Over one hundred, but looks around 25
Job: Big Brother Program Coordinator (CFUD Branch)
Canon: Boy meets girl. Boy loves girl. Boy promises to stay with girl forever even though the world keeps trying to tear them apart. Yes, he watches her while she sleeps and no, this isn’t a Twilight app. Akuma no Ororon follows Ororon, the devil king, and Chiaki, the daughter of an angel, as they fight for their love and kill a ton of people in the process. Totally adorable, right? Once it’s discovered that Ororon is not taking care of his royal duties it isn’t long before all Hell breaks loose, literally. Heaven, Hell and everything in between is intent on either having his head or dragging him back to the throne. One such pursuer is Ororon’s older brother Othello, the fifth prince.
Othello, the most eccentric playboy in the royal family, at least according to the tabloids, came to Earth after his younger brother in order to avoid having to take the throne himself. Othello is a smooth, charming and flirtatious man. However, despite this friendly demeanor, he does have his serious moments and is capable of great cruelty. And as the general of the Seiryu army, he is definitely a force to be reckoned with. This curious devil is accustomed to being obeyed and when he isn’t obeyed then others suffer. So put on your listening ears, okay~? Unless of course you're interested in some intensive training. His program is quite popular among the pretty young boys.
Sample Entry:
Well, this is certainly a first. I’ve never seen such a creature as the one called “Marcy” and, considering the sights one can see back home, that is saying quite a bit. If you ask me though, I don’t see what everyone is in such a tizzy about, not that I’m complaining. It’s amusing to see everyone get so upset over something so silly. You’d think a few creepy crawlies were the end of the world by the way these campers are reacting. To be fair, it wouldn’t hurt for something to be done about the smell, but this place does have a certain charm. Then again, that might just be because I have a weakness for unusual things.
Really though, I have to wonder where my little brother has led us now. Come out, come out wherever you are, Ororon! Big brother is here to look after you, so be good and come greet me properly. I came all this way and have yet to see hide or hair of him. Luckily I’m a very kind and forgiving older brother, so I’ll let it slide this once. I’ll just have to find some other way to keep myself amused for now. It would certainly be interesting to chat with the foliage and have it actually talk right back. However, there are plenty of lovely companions here in the flesh, in the rotting flesh anyways, and it would be rude to engage a plant instead of them. A gentleman should never let a lady be a wallflower, even if she is undead.
These ladies don’t look very ladylike at all though. If you ask me, they look very hungry for male….attention. Ha ha ha, they really are man eaters, aren’t they! What with those pesky bans, no one can really blame them. Unfortunately for them, my taste for the unusual doesn’t go that far. Sorry ladies, but I’m sure someone else will be able to properly appreciate the amount of time you spent arranging your remaining limbs just so. Now if you could kindly remove those hands before I must remove them for you? I’m sure after having lost your life that you’d like to hold on to the rotting shell you call a body at least. It’s nothing worth speaking about, but it’s all you have left, isn’t it? I appreciate it. Now that we’re acquainted, you haven’t happened to see a young man with three moles under his left eye, have you? No?
It seems I was wrong about my brother being here, and while this has proved to be an entertaining trip, I am a very busy man. I hope the Director will accept my sincere apology, but I’m going to have to cut this visit short. I’m sure that bit I heard about being stuck is just a mistake, not to mention I already have a job and a little brother of my own to take care of. She seems like an intelligent woman, and any intelligent person would know better than to hold a busy man such as myself here against his will. I’ll talk to her about it and get this whole thing straightened out. As long as she fixes this little barrier problem, I see no reason to hold this slip-up against her.
After all…mistakes happen ♥
Poll Vote!
Character: Simone Bradley
Series: Loving Annabelle
Character Age: 40
Job idea: Poetry Teacher
Canon: When the titular troublemaking daughter of a famous senator gets sent to an all-girl's Catholic school, she comes under the care of literature and French teacher Simone Bradley. Miss Bradley is the teacher everyone wants to do--even the headmaster, who happens to be her aunt. Simone is charged with getting Annabelle to follow the rules. But Simone quickly finds herself preoccupied with trying not to fall in love with this rambunctious underage student.
In the classroom, Simone is pretty much what you would expect from a Catholic schoolmarm: stern, composed and aware of every rule you're breaking. But she's actually a gentle, accommodating soul, unflappable by the strange quirks of her students but easily flustered when things start to get out of her control. It follows that outside the classroom, her gentle nature means she has no control over her life; without the authority of her position, she spends a lot of time starting to say something, then changing her mind because there's just no appropriate way to respond. And, of course, she easily folds to the whims of others.
Sample Post:
Good morning, class. My name is Miss Bradley. Miss Sayre and I recently sat down together for dinner, and while I was eating her--pie, class. Apple pie, not whatever you're snickering about. It was quite delicious, and I would appreciate it if you would all be so mature as to stop giggling now so that we can get on with class. Anyway, she asked me to join this year's staff for the holiday season to teach you the joys of poetry. You may have heard the saying "a picture is worth a thousand words." Well, a poem is just a picture that has been painted with words. It's art. A poet carefully selects each word so that as the audience reads the piece, they see the exact image he had in mind when he put pen to paper. Of course, there's a world of difference between the imagery of a poet's mind and a zombie's doodle of a brain in the margin of her textbook. I appreciate your artistic talent, Miss Aargh, but perhaps you had best save your enthusiasm for a visit to the Arts and Crafts hut.
Now, if you're quite ready to concentrate on our lesson, we will begin by reading Robert Herrick's "The Vine."
I dream'd this mortal part of mine
Was Metamorphoz'd to a Vine;
Which crawling one and every way,
Enthrall'd my dainty Lucia.
Let's stop here for a moment. Miss Marcy, what do you think Herrick is trying to show us, here? ...Wait--I--Marcy, what makes you think it's about tentacle rape? The narrator is dreaming that his body is actually a plant, stretching out and holding the attention of the object of his...affection. It's a realization about how one may change to better fulfill the needs of another.
No, look, there's no right or wrong. You do not need to demonstrate for the class how--Marcy! So long as this class is in session, you will behave appropriately and keep your tentacles to yourself. I can't even begin to count how many times you've violated the rules today! I'm going to have to ask you stay after class, so we may discuss your deviations--including the state of your clothing. Believe me, I know how it feels to want to set yourself apart from your peers, and I know that a Catholic schoolgirl uniform is hardly popular among people your age. You want to show that you aren't just part of the crowd. But uniforms really do have a good purpose--they keep the other students from being distracted by anything...unusual. For the moment, let's just say that in the future, you should remember that your skirt should cover at least to your mid-thigh...or. Well, if you stand up straight, the tips of your upper-most tentacles should touch the hem of your skirt. ...Your skirt, Marcy. Not mine.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Lung Tien Lien
Series: Temeraire
Age: in her 30s
Job: Revenge Etiquette Advisor
Canon: You yawned through at least a few parts of history class, didn't you? I guess you never realized was that your textbook needed a few GIGANTIC, SENTIENT DRAGONS.
Naomi Novik set out to remedy this lack with a work of historical fiction, starring Temeraire and his captain Laurence fighting for Britain during the Napoleonic wars. Temeraire should never have been in Britain in the first place - his egg was originally from China, a gift of the rarest Celestial breed from China to France's Emperor. During his many adventures, his elevated status in his homeland led him to meet Lung Tien Lien, his cousin and rival, during a mission meant to establish China's policy regarding his service with England.
Lien is another Celestial, a distinction of birth which should have led to her great status and popularity in China, as well as the companionship of one of the Imperial family. Unfortunately, she was "born in mourning colors" - an albino - and was held to be bad luck. Her companion, Prince Yongxing, rendered himself ineligible for the throne by choosing her, and eventually began scheming to get it back. Lien's lonely though highly ceremonial life was defined by Yongxing's hopes and dreams, so when his treasonous plot against his family, Laurence, and Temeraire resulted in his death, she swore vengeance against them and allied herself with Napoleon.
Proud, haughty, and disdainful of bad manners, Lien considers service her due and a bitter feud to the death no excuse to act uncivilized. If her lifetime of isolation and guilt over her "bad luck"'s effect on Yongxing left her with insecurities, she hides them very deeply.
Sample Entry:
It is with the greatest of pleasure that I arrive here today; the need for discussion between the states for which we are acting as representatives has become deeply necessary as this war of the Continent progresses, and I am glad to assist my adoptive nation in beginning it. Pray do not be alarmed; I assure you that his Majesty's aim in selecting me as ambassador was not to intimidate you, no matter how rightfully respectful of the Empire's growing influence as you may be, but merely to represent the new awareness of dragons' proper place in society that France's new order seeks to foster. As we winged citizens serve as the breath of the Empire, your foreign trade must serve as her blood for the duration of this war with England, whose ships seek to blockade our own. His Majesty cannot but be sensible of the importance of a good relationship with your colonies, to which France lent so much aid in your late struggles for liberty... and we cannot show our commitment to that relationship if you do not come back. Are all the officials of this land so poor-spirited in the face of dragons, then? How incivil.
I see no reason for either such rudeness or such squalor; indeed, no reason at all. The simple facts of the marshiness of the ground here and the general undesirability of the setting can be of no consequence, not when there are so many hands lying in idleness; even those lying on the ground can be pressed to more useful purposes than they serve at present. Surely even such a barbaric place cannot advocate leaving severed limbs to putrefy after a battle! It does the soil less good than an acceptable fertilizer would; remove them at once. It is easy to see why France saw fit to sell this land for such a ridiculous sum, even if ready capital was necessary for the war effort - such conduct from lesser persons is not fitting for either citizens of the Empire, or neighbors. Such ungrateful persons would have done better to continue paying tribute to the poison-traders of Britain, though I'd entertained hopes that your defection arose from a rather better frame of mind; but it is not as if these Western lands have obeyed decency or decorum in any other sense. My hopes were too high.
I will wait here for the presence of one E. Sayre, the official the Emperor has had contact with; if you wish to have access to these hovels with any ease, I believe someone must find him in short order. If there is anyone of distinction in this settlement, they may wish to inform this water-dwelling creature that I do not associate with any who might try to speak with me without habits of proper hygiene; if she wishes to wash the impurities of her current place of residence from her hide and adopt a more pleasing tone of address, I might accept an introduction, but not before. There is a dignity that a Celestial must uphold, one must understand; I would hesitate to interrupt her speech, as it is only a small honor to count myself among their number, but I must put forward that after centuries of development, they are quite possibly the most advanced breed of dragons the world has seen; the best dragons, that is to say, of all time.
Of all time.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Koganei Keitarou
Series: The Weatherman is My Lover
Age: 25
Job: Official "Straight" Man
Canon: Chou Hayaoki TV (Super Early Morning TV) has a rather eccentric cast and crew, but because of this it's extremely popular -- even though it airs at 4 AM. The stars of the show are Koganei Keitarou, a calm, serious, and by-the-book newscaster, and Amasawa Chitose, a bright, perky, and outwardly very silly weatherfairyman. Chitose's habit of incessantly teasing Koganei and their sharply contrasting natures keep the viewers on the edge of their seats, eagerly waiting for Koganei's patience to find its end and for him to reprimand Chitose on air. Yet despite their vast differences, Koganei and Chitose eventually find themselves drawn in a romantic relationship.
Stoic, sober, and straight-laced. These are the sort of things most people think of when they first get to know Koganei and they're really not far off the mark. This is the full extent of Koganei's apparent character and with his closed nature and many people considering his personality 'bad' most people don't bother to get to know him better. But when someone does come to understand him on more than a surface level, and vice versa of course, they tend to discover that while serious and not-very-fun on the job, he can still be friendly and playful while not working and does have a clever, devious side as well, even if he find little reason to put it to use. He plays the straight man to Chitose and displays a surprising amount of patience while on air, even if he'll yell at his coworkers once the camera's stopped rolling.
Sample Post:
Sound test. Check, check. All clear? Good, good-- are those corpses running the camera? They're just zombies? The living dead? That isn't any better, we really shouldn't be-- well, no, I don't think the camera should just sit there, there needs to be someone running it. 'Zombies' just aren't the best choice. Can't we get someone else? ... Ah, well, if it's going to take too long that's fine. As long as they behave... Alright, give me the cue.
... Good morning, and thank you for tuning in. I'm Koganei Keitarou with the Camp News Network, reporting from the lake. We're here today looking into the sudden increase in the number of telepathic toucans living in and around the camp. Eye-witnesses report what's been described as 'an alarming number' of the creatures harassing campers and counselors alike, telling dirty jokes and demanding information about the squid in the lake and the zombies that populate the camp. Some witnesses believe that the increase in the number of toucans is connected to the abnormally large number of flying penises, which are said to be very delicious... The abnormally large number of flying... penises... seen migrating further south for the winter. A team from our station attempted to speak with some of the gorillas in the camp, but were chased off when the gorillas began to throw lawn chairs and one of the zombies at them.
In other news, there-- ... there appears to be an abrupt-- Quit that-- an abrupt-- Stop it whoever-- w-wait, is that-- why is there a squid--? I apologize, ladies and gentlemen, we're having some-- some difficulties, there appears to be-- No squid should be this big-- W-woah, wait! No, no, don't! I'm not a-- augh! No, no, no, put me down! No, not in the lake--! Auurghlesh!
... I-I apologize again, ladies and gentlemen, there was some-- interference caused by... the giant squid that lives in the lake.
This is Koganei Keitarou, reporting with your ... Camp Fuck You Die News.
All right, now that the camera is off... What were you thinking?! What on earth is this? What do you think you're doing? No one said anything about flying penises! That wasn't on the teleprompter before, either, quit changing the script! I don't care if it's more interesting, stop! No one watches the news to be entertained, they watch it to learn about the important events that are happening in the world around them. I'm being serious, don't -- you're not going to change it? Why not? Hey, hey, no! Don't turn the camera on, we're done! I-- just don't change it from now on! Please? We can't-- but....
... Fine. Fine! We'll do it your way, just-- just, get everything put away, we wouldn't want the squid to knock it over. I'm going to die if this keeps up.
Poll Vote!