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Dec 18, 2010 12:15

Have some more apps!

Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!

Now VOTE. Closed!


Character: Feferi Peixes (cuttlefishCuller)
Series: Homestuck
Character Age: 6 Alternian solar sweeps (approximately 13 Earth years)

Canon: You mean you haven't had enough of this canon yet? Well, alright. Homestuck is a mish-mash of a webcomic that's supposed to be a story about four kids who are destined to play some crazy game and save the universe or something like that. No one cares about them, though, since the trolls did it before them, and did it way better. Said trolls are nasty little creatures who have their own little planet, a probably-thriving society, and their own convoluted, vaguely endearing customs. Among them are both land-dwelling and sea-dwelling trolls, and there seems to be a little extra animosity between the two.

A terrible example of such sea-dwelling trolls, and trolls in general: Feferi Peixes. Terminally upbeat and chipper, and pretty much excited about everything, she's quite nice as far as trolls go. She can't even manage to dump her best friend without at least throwing in a few of her frequent and favored fish puns. Having the most noble blood on the hemospectrum makes her the heiress apparent for the title of Empress, provided that her race manages to escape a prophesied extinction, she has all sorts of progressive plans for her rulership. She'd love to unite the sea-dwellers and the land-dwellers, redefine "culling" from exterminating the sick and dying to caring for them, etc., etc., insert other adorable princess things here. Heck, she even practically runs an aquatic wildlife rescue out of her very own home! How can you get any cuter than that? I'll tell you: you can't.

Her online handle is cuttlefishCuller, and s)(e )(as an -ESP-ECIALLY annoying typing quirk. However she has been known to stop using it for serious situations or on request, however grudgingly.

Sample Post:

cuttlefishCuller [CC] began trolling campFuckUDie [CFUD]

CC: Glub glub 38)
CC: Glub glub glub glub glub glub glub!!
CC: O)(, )(e)(e, I guess it is probably difficult for everybody to reply as all toget)(er.
CC: T)(at's okay, I just wanted everybody to know t)(at I am R----EALLY )(APPY to be )(ere finally!
CC: T)(is )(uman 'summer camp' idea seems really fun! I )(ave never seen so many diverse )(umans in one place before!
CC: And I )(ear it's really difficult to get in, too!
CC: T)(at everybody is super stern about grammar and formatting! T)(ings like t)(at.
CC: ...w)(ic)( I guess means me, too!

Sooo, since I do want to be here, I won't use the neat formatting and I'll even get rid of the totally adorable font color, so now we're all in the same boat! Is that better for you? It's not really that hard to read, but okay! I will gladly respect the human inability to fathom such high-brow stylings and lower myself to such a level, for the sake of diplomacy and getting along and all that! You're welcome.

Anyway, as I was saying! I'm super excited to be here and learn about human bonding customs! I can't wait to start learning more about Earth culture and all, but... Don't take this the wrong way or anything! It just feels like this place was misrepresented, and yet all that glubbing over watch out for the missile tow and stay away from Marcy was going way overboard! To be honest, I don't see any missiles around, and I met Marcy- she's so sweet, once you get to know her! Maybe you don't believe me, but I mean it!

Let me ask you this, Mister Listless McRotting-Pants: have you ever even tried? I mean really, really tried? No, I think not! So maybe she does come on a little strong with all the grabbing and the clothing tearing, but if you were her, and no one ever came to visit you in your little metal tower, you would get lonely too. -You're not even listening anymore, are you? I suppose you are far too interested in trying to consume the other campers to pay any attention. It is making it a little difficult to have an enriching human bonding experience, and I think I know enough about human interaction to know that it's hardly polite!

Hmmmmm. Well, if you're a little at sea about how to make a good first impression, maybe I can offer some advice! A little courtesy is a pretty tide and true way of getting off on the right foot, and you could stand to tone down the lunging and biting just a bit? Glubsiiigh. With friends who want to eat you, who needs anemones?

Poll Vote!

Character: Carver Descartes
Series: The Weekenders
Character Age: 12

Canon: Meet the weekend. I assume you are familiar with its premise. Also meet Tino, Lor, Carver and Tish, veteran Weekendologists dedicated to the study of those elusive two days of the week. Each weekend, this group embarks on rigorous study of such activites as arcade games, pizza eating and just plain hanging out. It's a tough job, but someone has to do it.

Carver Descartes. Shoeologist. Lover of chilli cheese fries. Occasional cross dresser. Carver will tell you that he is cooler than anyone he has ever met and someday will be famous. Anyone who has ever met Carver would likely tell you differently. Self-centred, incredibly shallow and sometimes quite insecure. Has a head shaped like a pineapple.

Sample Post:

Now, I love a good costume party. No, I do. I love it like burning. But I think when you all rolled in dead animals to pull off the zombie smell, you were crossing some kind of line that should never be crossed in the law of the costume party. It might even be in the Constitution.

I could give you guys some pointers on a good party - let Master Carver help you all out. I promise you won't regret it.

Okay, first off, the Night of the Living Dead meets Children of the Corn theme is great. It really is. But-- hey hey hey, those are my shoes you're spitting ketchup on. I hope that's ketchup. But you have to stick to theme here. If Children of the Corn had a giant squid in the cornfield, you'd be all set, but your papier mache thing here is all wrong, and I.... Your papier mache squid just wrapped a tentacle around my leg. Right.

Let's move on. Any good party needs good food. I already lost my appetite, but you guys look hungry. It's the drooling. I know you've got a cafeteria back there, but uh, I know cafeteria food. We have a difficult relationship. You deserve better. I deserve better. You know in your hearts - and I can see a few - that I'm right.

Finally, and I've left the most important thing to last here - fashion. Don't look at me like that with that fake hanging eyeball, sir, I'm serious. The costumes are great, but nothing says 'I put effort into this and so should you' like wearing good shoes with your blood stained clothing. A Vivienne Westwood eyepatch over that gaping eye socket.

And if you don't know how to accessorise and bring together a disgruntled gorilla with your hanging intestines, I really don't think I can help you.

Poll Vote!

Character: Lorraine "Lor" McQuarrie
Series: The Weekenders
Character Age: 12

Canon: When you're in middle school, what else is there to look forward to but the weekend? Clearly, Disney understood, because they created The Weekenders, a cartoon devoted solely to a group of four friends who live in Bahia Bay, California, and the shenanigans they get up to between Friday and Sunday every week. Together, they struggle through the weirdness of growing up while simultaneously trying to achieve the elusive "ultimate weekend."

Lor McQuarrie is the group's tomboy and dumb jock. Although she's not actually as stupid as she initially appears, Lor is enthusiastic about things she likes and sleeps through everything else, which means she's excellent at sports and video games, but doesn't know which country fought in the American Civil War. Competitive and tough (growing up with over thirteen brothers will do that to you), Lor can be insensitive, especially about things that don't interest her. But she at least tries to do right by her friends, and she cares about them deeply.

Sample Post:

You guys, I have to admit it. At first I wasn't exactly sure if Camp FUN's Weekend Program was gonna be a good fit for me. I mean, the very first thing I saw when I got off the bus was a bunch of Asian kids, and I was like, 'Woah. Is this a camp for smart people?' But after talking to some of you, I realized my mistake. No offense. Anyway, it was nice to learn a valuable lesson about stereotypes, or something, and it looks like I'll fit in better than I expected after all.

I totally didn't realize that today was your annual Zombie Crawl, by the way. I've never been to one that was Zombies Vs Humans before, and it was pretty intense! I'd like to offer a formal apology to the kid that I punched in the face, though. I got way too into the whole Midwestern zombie apocalypse scenario and I seriously thought you were trying to bite me. So, yeah. Whoops! Anyway, apart from that, the whole experience was super cool. While I was walking to my cabin, holding that fake shotgun, I felt like George Washington crossing the Delaware during World War II or something. Kind of cold and dirty and gross, but totally exhilarated, like I could take on the whole world. If the whole world was full of zombies.

I even think I can handle Marcy. C'mon, c'mon, don't give me those looks. I've been hearing rumors about her all day, but she doesn't seem that bad! Blah, blah, blah, she owns her own silo or whatever, blah, she has no concept of personal space, blah, she'll pound me if I don't watch my back... Well, let me tell you one thing. I'm not afraid to get down and dirty if I have to! If Marcy decides to mess with me, I'll pound her right back. I'll pound her and hard.

So all in all, I think I'm gonna like it here! And if it doesn't work out, no worries, 'cause I'll be gone on Sunday night, never to return. You guys won't get to try the haggis I stashed in my suitcase, but... Wait, this isn't the Weekend Program?

Well. This place just got way less attractive.

Poll Vote!

Character: Ruka Souen
Series: Vampire Knight
Character Age: 17

Canon: Protecting the peace by moonlight and sleeping through class by daylight, Yuuki Cross is a sweet girl with a lot on her plate. Her foremost duty is to keep anyone from finding out the secret of the much admired Night Class. While they are beautiful and glamorous, they are also vampires attending the academy to foster friendship between them and the humans who attend the Day Class. Not all are quick to play nice, even get along with, their fellow students. However, when it matters most, the students, Night or Day Class, are able to rally together.

As a member of the Night Class, Ruka Souen is a vampire of nobility-A fact that she will not let anyone forget. Rarely losing her composure, she is a woman of grace and elegance that does not hesitate to act as she must. Though, she rarely acts against her will. Beneath her cool exterior, Ruka is stubborn and prideful, quick to make sharp remarks about those acting out of place. She does not tolerate disrespect and will correct anyone she finds distasteful. She is not without affection for others, even if isn't exactly kind about showing it. Still, Ruka cares deeply for Kaname, even following him to the academy, and does her best to serve him however she can.

Sample Entry:

Is this how you treat guests? I accepted your crude invitation, because I believed Kaname-sama was here. However, construction paper is not appropriate for any kind of correspondence, even a summer camp for children. In the future, you should use proper penmanship and an envelope. I mistakenly arrived at a swamp before a sickly gentleman corrected me on this camp's location. Then, your driver had the nerve to throw my luggage out into the dirt. I would have corrected him, but he drove away too quickly. I expect someone else to speak with him. Immediately. Lastly, I do not care to, but I will demean myself again to instruct your companions on how to treat a lady. Do not grab, do not touch, and do not grunt. Now that we are clear, you may gently pick up my luggage and show me to my room.

I can't believe the impudence of the people here. They dress up in smelly costumes and don't speak a word. Well, they should not speak until spoken to, so that can be forgiven. But if they are like this all the time, then I can't imagine the indignities that Kaname-sama has faced. Hands all over him . . . People trying to feed from him . . . No, it won't be allowed anymore! I don't know why he is here, and I will not question his reason. I'm sure that he has a noble ambition, even if it may be wasted on those here. But I cannot mistake this scent, so while he remains here, I will make sure that he is treated properly.

Were you staring at me? You shouldn't gawk, either. That you have been allowed to continue this way is inexcusable, and I am taking it upon myself to correct this. Now, pull your jaw up, because you will be part of the effort. I will instruct you in proper conduct, and you will pass that on to the rest of those here. Hmm, there is also the matter of a handbook and instructional cards for the slower students . . . You will be in charge of that as well. And you should remember there is a certain distance that should be maintained, so do not follow me so closely. I can feel your breath on my neee-Ahh! I said do not grab!

Oh my, excuse me. Well, I'm sure that he will be able to walk it off . . . And that tree will mend in a few years.

Poll Vote!

Character: Senel Coolidge
Series: Tales of Legendia
Character Age: 17

Canon: Tales of Legendia takes place aboard the Legacy, an abnormally large ship which is actually home to an entire continent. Senel Coolidge and his sister, Shirley, arrive here accidentally after escaping from a certain group who sought to capture the latter on account of her powers. Unfortunately, she is taken by someone else just after their arrival. Unbeknownst to the world at large, Shirley happens to be the Merines, the chosen one of a group of people called the Ferines. A long time ago, there was a war that broke out between the Ferines, who were people of the sea, and the Orerines, who were people of the land. Now that the chosen one has surfaced once again, the animosity between the two races has been rekindled, and Senel sets forth to rescue Shirley and reach a peaceful agreement to stop the war before it’s too late.

Senel is the protagonist of the story, although he starts off rather self-centered, abrasive, and generally antisocial. He’s only concerned with the safety of his sister, and he only trusts himself to take care of her. He refuses help and runs off on his own, but eventually he realizes that he can’t do it alone. Once he learns to trust the new friends he’s made along the way and accept their aid in completing his tasks, he softens quickly. While he still maintains an overall serious nature, he is able to laugh and joke with them as well. He can be competitive, and he won’t back down from a challenge even if it was posed against his will. He remains protective of his sister and of his friends, but he respects their freedom to act upon their own wishes. He’s made great strides in terms of his maturity and wishes to repay the kindness and insight his friends lent him along the way.

NOTE: “Phantom Dragon Dance” is an attack move of Senel’s.

Sample Post:

It figures. Every time you're running late, you hit every obstacle and wind up even later. Why exactly am I doing this again, anyway? Just because I've got some experience under my belt doesn't mean I'm the authority on fighting. But try telling that to a bunch of gorillas, right? Ever since I happened to "save" one from that large sea creature, they haven't stopped following me. (And actually, it just happened to be nearby when I was taking out that monster, anyway.) But what's done is done; no use dwelling on it. Let's see, was this the building?

Looks like it. Sorry I'm late, everyone. But it looks like everyone's still here, so I'll get right to it. This meeting was called because I was asked to teach you all some basic combat skills. While I've heard it's been relatively peaceful here, it never hurts to have the means to defend yourself. Granted, this is my first time teaching gorillas... But so long as you're all willing to put forth the effort, then I'm not giving up, either. I was thinking that it's probably best to pair up for this, but before that, I'll need a volunteer so you can see it before you perform it. Any takers? Don't be nervous; it's just practice, so I'll go easy on you.

Okay, you in the doorway with the... skin condition. You're not a gorilla; do you even go here? This session was supposed to just be for them, but I guess it won't hurt to have you along, too. No one else was volunteering anyway, so let's get started then. First off, we're gonna start with defense. You want to keep your fists raised and positioned close to your body, prepared for an attack at any moment, like this. Now you try aiming a punch at me. Give it all you've got; don't worry about hurting me. That's it! Did everyone see how the attack was stopped? Now we'll try it in reverse, so I'll punch and you block. Hands up, like I showed you! And... Take that!

Oops, sorry. I must have used too much force. I didn't mean to knock your arm off like that, but it reattaches pretty easily, doesn't it? Hey, gorillas, calm down! It's not like the same thing's going to happen to you. Stop panicking or you're just going to end up hurting yourselves. You two in the back! Didn't you hear me? We haven't started yet, so you shouldn't be hitting each other. Hey! I said, break it up! Yeah, I know the purpose of this meeting was to learn how to fight, but if you can't control yourselves, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. There are times when you're going to have to use physical force, but it's also important to know when those times are. Acting on raw emotion alone rarely gets things solved, and chances are you're going to end up with a lot of regrets, whether or not your actions prove to be successful... Still ignoring me, huh? Then it looks like this is one of those times. Phantom Dragon Dance!

Sorry, looks like I forgot to go easy on you.

Poll Vote!

Character: Ren
Series: Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon
Age: ~15

Canon: So a bunch of scientists got together and managed to get world-wide funding for some occult project that kind of ended up killing 90% of the population. And allowed ghosts and monsters to roam the earth. Good job, guys. So, needless to say, the world kind of sucks to live in. Unfortunately, it’s where Seto, a young boy who is plagued by loneliness, is stuck. After the old man he was living with passes away, Seto is compelled by his desire to find someone--anyone--to wile away the days with. This same desire is what compels him to latch onto (read: stalk) the first and only living person he can find: a young girl with a beautiful singing voice.

Seto’s stalking pays off, and the girl, Ren, later joins him in his travels. Ren can come off as a strange, aloof girl of few words, little emotion, but with plenty of time to scribble strange drawings over the floors and walls of ghost-infested buildings. And it’s true Ren is reserved and taciturn, but it’s not because she doesn’t feel anything; she simply tends to be that way, particularly around those she doesn’t know very well. She is cautious around other creatures and the stray human first, but, for Ren, if one can gain the trust of a cat--an animal whom she has a close connection with--then they’re golden, and she opens up to them a little more. At her core, Ren is a vagrant with a childish heart. Naïve, simplistic, and slightly immature, Ren lives in the moment. She doesn’t deny herself her feelings, and once her trust has been gained, it’s easy to see the excitable and curious girl beneath the surface, even without her words. Though she may fall victim to an occasional bout of insecurity or pride, she doesn’t let it get her down and keeps on trucking, Seto by her side.

Note: Ren is being apped with supplemental canon from the manga.

Sample Post:

[Just outside the Arts and Crafts hut lies a strange sight: a ring of cats and gorillas surrounding a colorful sea of markers, crayons, and colored pencils, at the center of which being a young girl, who is kneeling carefully over a large piece of cardboard, Zombie Flesh Green crayon in hand. At first glance, her expression might seem blank, but upon closer inspection one would see the slightest downward curve of the corner of her mouth, and her thin eyebrows furrowed under her mess of silver hair in deep concentration over her drawing.

She looks up again at her model, eyes wide and mouth parted slightly, as if trying to take it all in. So round! So big! So new! And the way the squiddy-squid (her own personal name for it) caressed the high-flying toucans in ways she couldn’t even see with its tentacles...! Determined to capture the breadth of her model best she can, she stretches her arm so far that her scantily covered breasts press against the cardboard -- causing the gorillas all lean forward in rapt attention, hands folded politely(?) over their crotches. But it’s not long until she draws herself back and begins scribbling furiously in circles, her tongue sticking out the slightest bit. The gorillas sigh, leaning back.

The sighs seem to snap her out of her frenzy, and she suddenly turns her head toward them, as if only just noticing they were there. She stares warily at them, but, spotting the cats lounging peacefully at the gorillas’ sides, relaxes. After a moment, a small smile bubbles up to the surface of her face, and she points somewhat eagerly from what appears to be a gigantic, green tumbleweed on a pole gripping a number of fleas -- her drawing, in other words -- to her model on the silo.]

… Where did you come from? [She giggles softly.] Either way... Please tell me. Does this look like the the one on the tower?

[The gorillas shift about awkwardly, looking elsewhere. Her smile drops, and she looks back down at what she had thought was a masterpiece just a second ago, inspecting it for any flaws. But suddenly, she seems to realize something and clasps her hands together, face brightening up considerably.]

King Kong! I saw a poster on ground once, with a big animal on a tower holding something small, and lots of flying things around it. [She watches her audience triumphantly, as if her meaning were clear. But, evidently, they need more insight behind her sudden revelation. She continues excitedly.] So, what Ren’s drawing is missing is that “something small,” right? Won’t you be that “something small” for me...?

[... Well, at least her meaning was clear now. Clear enough that the gorillas start inching back at her suggestion, obviously not game. Ren notices this and sags dejectedly, disheartened by their blatant lack of cooperation with her brilliant plan. It’s tough out there being an artist.]

Poll Vote!
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