(no subject)
Third batch! hooooooo.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Jin Kisaragi
Series: BlazBlue
Character Age: ~19-21.
Canon: In an alternate future, the world has been thrown into peril due to the appearance of a powerful monster known as the Black Beast. Thanks to the help of six heroes fighting to hold off the Beast, mankind was able to use a fusion of science and magic to create weapons known as Ars Magus, ultimately using them to defeat the threat. Following these events, an organization called the Novus Orbis Librarium (aka the NOL) was formed to regulate the use of Ars Magus. However, since the NOL is essentially a military force, it has its fair share of opposition. The most notorious rebel out to destroy the NOL is Ragna the Bloodedge, commonly known as the “Grim Reaper.” He's the owner of the Azure Grimoire “BlazBlue,” the most powerful Ars Magus in existence. So, logically, they try to hunt him down.
Cold as the ice sword he wields, Jin is a Major in the NOL. He's honored as a "hero" even though all he did was follow the NOL's orders. So it comes as a surprise to his superiors when he suddenly abandons his duties to pursue Ragna. To most people, Jin appears to be unapproachable; he's calm and collected, and he's curt when he speaks. He's rarely unnerved even when faced with unexpected surprises, and he's practical, indifferent to praises and prestige. Underneath his stoic exterior, Jin has harsh opinions for people in general. He finds them repulsive and irritating, especially those he finds weak. Although he tries to avoid them, he'll become hostile if they become an obstacle. However in a complete contrast to his usual self, Jin behaves in a demented, childlike way when he's confronting Ragna, gleeful about fighting him. He has a one track mind when it comes to finding the Grim Reaper, and is willing to put himself through any obstacle, even obvious traps, if it means finding him. He affectionately claims that the only thing that can make him feel "alive" is the thought of killing Ragna and he'll furiously cut down whoever gets in the way of this bad bromance.
Note: Characters in BlazBlue narrates their story through inner monologue, which includes their thoughts and feelings on situations. Jin is being apped with his Japanese voice in mind.
Sample Post:
I was suddenly assigned to be stationed at a new branch of the NOL; specifically I was ordered to train the new recruits. The assignment also said they were a bunch of apes. I assumed it meant that they were imbeciles, but it turns out they were literally a bunch of gorillas. The idiocy still applies, however. Although I declined, the apes were insistent on throwing me a welcoming party. The party itself was more revolting than "welcoming". People in general disgust me, but the serving staff at the party disgusted me even more: they smelt horrible, maggots were crawling in their skin, and parts of their body kept falling into the food. I excused myself early because I couldn't stomach staying at that so called party longer than I had to, but apparently those gorillas weren't finished with being a nuisance.
The next day they interrupted the training session to give me a car as another welcoming gift. I wasn't interested in listening to their reasoning, but they wasted my time by telling me about it anyway. They explained with their crude body language that they thought that I would like to ride a Nissan. Despite my best efforts, I couldn't begin to fathom what could possess their inferior primate minds into thinking that I was interested in obtaining an automobile, let alone care what brand it was. And even if I were interested, how did those foolish apes expect me to drive the vehicle when there are more cornfields than roads in this damn place? Their presumptuous and forceful behavior towards me was steadily growing from a minor irritation to a full annoyance. In fact, I wouldn't have hesitated to deal with them then as they tried to usher me into the car had they not reported to me that the Grim Reaper was in the area.
At that moment, a chill ran down my spine. Could it be? Was he really here? Excitement rushed through me as if a bind had been loosened, allowing me to feel again. If I could meet him again. . . If I could meet Ragna in this hellhole it would more than make up for all the foolishness I've had to go through since coming here. I was excited to anticipate the kind of expression he would make when he saw me. Would it be happy? Would it be sad? Or would it be that heated expression of hatred? I wondered if he would be as excited as I am at the thought of me sinking my blade into him. However, to my utter disappointment, what awaited me there wasn't Ragna. It was an impostor, a mere scarecrow crudely dressed up by those bastard gorillas. My disappointment turned into rage that they had the nerve to set up such a cheap mockery of someone important to me. How dare they? How dare they. . .!? Did they really want to incur my wrath so much that they would commit this unforgivable crime?
Hell was a warm welcome for them by the time I was through.
Poll Vote!
Character: Noel Vermillion
Series: BlazBlue
Character Age: ~17-18.
Canon: In the future, governing the world is the Novus Orbis Librarium (NOL or Librarium for short) whose sole purpose is to keep balance in the world and safeguard the Ars Magus, weapons created from science and magic that was once used to tame an ancient threat. However, there are many people who aren’t cool with their tyrannical control and a prime example is Ragna the Bloodedge. He goes around destroying NOL branches with an Ars Magus known as the Azure Grimoire, “BlazBlue”, supposedly the most powerful Ars Magus in existence. This leads to Ragna becoming the most wanted man currently, with a hefty price on his head which encourages vigilantes, the NOL, and everyone around into trying to capture him.
Enter Noel Vermillion, who is introduced when she is assigned to make Major Jin Kisaragi of the NOL, her superior, return to his post when he goes AWOL for unknown reasons. She does her best to look calm and collected for her job, but the truth of the matter is that she’s the exact opposite. She’s clumsy, she’s shy, she stutters, she has self-confidence issues (ex. her chest size), heck, she prefers to order things online just to avoid talking to people in-person. Despite all this, Noel is a kind hearted girl who loves her family, friends, writing poems, and has a soft spot for things that are fluffy and cute. There’s even a possibility of her being deeper than she looks. Too bad her best just never seems to be enough in the end, though, what with her failing horribly at her work. There’s just no such thing as nice things apparently.
Sample Post:
Our current assignment is that we are supposed to come to this new branch and train the new recruits. I was nervous at first, ahaha... Actually, I’m still nervous. I just wanted to try and get to know everyone! But they’re really intimidating and I couldn’t even say a single thing properly... I’m sure I’ve made a bad impression now and they probably think I’m rude or that I don’t like them. . . B-But, it’s not like that! It’s just that they’re so huge, hairy, and they smell! I-I never thought that all the new recruits would be gorillas! S-Speaking of rude, it’s not like I was the only one! Some of them started ignoring me after a while! So I’m not completely in the wrong… Right? I kind of don’t want to be here now...
But I can't just abandon the assignment! ... Which is what I want to say, but I got lost somehow. I was supposed to follow one of the gorillas to the meeting place of the training spot but in the end I got distracted by the...g-giant squid... I was following him but then I saw these tentacles coming from a silo! They were so slimy and gross and, and... Without thinking, I started attacking it but then it just got angrier! I, I never thought I would see so many tentacles in my life... I ended up running away after that since I just knew that I wanted to get as far away as possible from it! And before I knew it, I was lost. They actually have something like that here...! Why would they do that? Is it some sort of new defense mechanism? If it is, I can’t say that I really care for it... It can’t be used in defense since it attacked me didn’t it?! But I can't actually say that or else I'll be the one in trouble with my superiors... Plus I’m supposed to be a Lieutenant but I can’t even handle a squid. What’s worse is that I actually ran away from it. If they find out about that, I’ll definitely be in trouble especially since it’s like abandoning my job.
So I decided to try and ask the locals for directions. I mean, that's what anyone would do, right? As long as I didn't give out any classified information then it should be just fine! But I couldn't understand what the locals were saying... I, um, guess that happens when you're rotting and the only thing you can say is "brrraaaaiiins"... Z-Zombies... Why are all of these here? Zombies, gorillas, and giant squids; are these supposed to help in defense? Wouldn’t it be nicer to have something like a panda! Or a puppy! Those are cute and fluffy, ehehehe... I can just imagine their ears, their tails, waaaah, so fluffy. Aaaah, that would make everything around here so much more blissful... Ah, I mean-! B-But that’s impossible, this is supposed to be a military base, Noel, not a pet zoo! But it’d still be really cute... T-That aside, in the end, I gave him a pen and paper so that maybe he could write the directions down at least. Instead he gave me...
There is a lot you lack.
Not only in brains.
But a rack.
- How could he write something that rude!? All I did was ask for directions, he didn't need to pick on me about that! Why is it that getting something nice is so difficult?
Poll Vote!
Character: Aoyagi Masamune
Series: Clone Baby
Character Age: 19
Canon: Once upon a time, just for the lulz (and in the interests of science), eleven clones were created to play a psychological game of musical chairs. They are controlled by a magnet-like force that draws them to the other clones, wherever they may be. If they encounter a clone who shares the same genes, the pair will instinctively fight and try to kill each other. Several clones have already been found murdered with their organs removed, and no one knows who is responsible. The clones' ultimate mission is to kill all the others, take the last "chair," and win the game. Somehow that chair ended up in the hands of Aoyagi Masamune.
Masamune was failing school, frequently getting beaten up by bullies, and had trouble at home. Eventually it all became too much for him. Just when he was about to end his life by jumping off a building, a mysterious man showed up and pushed him off the edge instead. That's when Masamune's real problems started. This was super-troll Kikuchi Hiro, another clone who wants Masamune dead and is trying to steal his girlfriend. Now, Masamune can't be sure of who he is any more or even if he's really still alive. He struggles to face up to the fact that to survive the game he'll have to kill all the remaining clones. When he isn't running from other clones, Masamune is a normal enough guy. His self-esteem is pretty low and because he's insecure, he often lashes out at people without really meaning to. Ultimately, he cares about his family and girlfriend, and wants his life back. If there's a way to get his fellow clones out of the picture and end the craziness, he's determined to find it.
Sample Post:
Hey! Let me in. Just open the door. I need somewhere to hide. It's not like you were here first - alright, yes, actually you were. Never mind about that now, I'm in trouble. There are people outside trying to kill me. I'm serious. You can't miss them. They're a weird colour, they smell funny, and they keep saying "draaaaaains" for some reason. Maybe they fell down a drain and that's why they smell like that? They were pretty slow. I managed to outrun them, but I know they're only minutes away from us. You have to help me!
Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I don't mean to come in here and kick you out but there isn't enough room for two of us. You're pretty big, if you don't mind me saying. Why are you hiding in a storage closet anyway? You're a gorilla, don’t you want to sit in a tree or something? Don't worry, I won’t tell anyone you're here. I know you must have gone through terrible things wherever you came from. The brochure said that Camp Flee from Ur Doom is the safest place in the world to hide from your enemies, and no camper is ever judged on their personal circumstances. Someone like you must have some scary people to run away from. They even turned you purple!
Could you take your paw off of my back, please? It's not very comfortable in here. You should ask for a cabin. I had one when I first came to camp but I can't hide there now. I'd have to go outside and then those guys that keep saying "draaaains" would find me. I don't even think it's my cabin any more. My roommate moved in. I wouldn't mind him being a robotic cow but then he sneezed and set fire to the bed ... Stop laughing! Don't be so loud. I said, there are people coming to kill me at any moment. They'll hear you. They'll probably kill you too so you can’t tell anybody what you saw ...
... Did you hear that? That's them! They're right outside the door. What are we going to do now? Oh, wait, I don't think it's "drains" they're saying. What's that? Brains? They're going to take our brains! That's it, you can talk to them. I'm staying here. No, I'm not pushing you out of the closet, I'm helping you out. Sorry!
Poll Vote!
Character: Graham Specter
Series: Baccano!
Character Age: 20-ish
Canon: Baccano! is the story of how 1930's American gangsters end up drinking an elixir of immortality. Or maybe it's about a three-way conflict between terrorists, mobsters and delinquents aboard a transcontinental express train. Or maybe it's about a girl's attempts to convince information brokers to help her find her missing brother. Either way, the story elegantly weaves together characters and times with both heart-warming villainy and unlikely innocence. And you don't have to be immortal to enjoy life and raise the titular ruckus-everyone in this show is quite capable of doing that.
Graham Specter is no exception. He's the leader of a gang of delinquents, although how he managed that is anyone's guess, since his plans don't seem to benefit anyone but himself; he appears to be a mechanic, but he enjoys breaking things rather than fixing them. Mostly, Graham's just crazy. His monologues are violently unpredictable-Graham yells, rambles, repeats himself, leaps from one subject to another with wild non sequiturs, hits things or people with his wrench at random, and just when you think he's managed a bit of almost-coherent philosophy, he cheerfully contradicts himself in the next sentence. It's all okay for Graham as long as there's a fun story to be told, and his gang aren't his friends or underlings so much as his audience.
Sample Post:
[There is a man in blue coveralls sitting on the hood of a tractor. He has a wrench half the size of his body, which he is flipping in the air casually.]
Aah~! Let me spin you a sad, sad tale, a a tale of love and of peace. You see, I heard the director here had a love, the love of her life, the loss of the life of which meant she dedicated her life to forever altering the lives of others. That's what this place is, right? Aah, it's a brilliant backdrop, the all-consuming despair that drives her to impossibilities, to pull people apart, to tear people from their very universes! I like to break things, you know, but I don't think I've ever broken universes. Still, it's an appropriate setting for the stories I, Graham Specter, have to tell. But-!
[Abruptly he jumps, swinging the wrench wildly and smashing the tractor's windshield.]
That story's over now, isn't it? The lovers have been united! It's a happy ending. Well, happy and sad. Happy for them, and sad for us, that is. Because we're still here! Or, still somewhere. Still trapped, anyway, trapped in our peaceful idyll, our timeless prison, with our gently waving fields of corn and our rotting dead things that fall apart before you even touch them! That's not very fun, is it? No! No, no, no, no, no!
[He turns to the tractor, wrench in one hand and smaller tools in the other, hands moving swiftly, undoing bolts and prying loose metal. One huge wheel falls loose, then another. He keeps working while he talks.]
Ah, the story has to move forward. I have to move it forward! But how can I move it forward, when I'm stuck in time like everyone else? Aah, it's sad! It's so sad I can barely bear it, even when I'm doing what I like best-and I am doing what I like best, because what I like best is taking apart physical things. Disassembling, dismantling, deconstructing, destroying... Oh, D is a good letter. But not as good as another letter would be-A letter from the Director, a letter that tells me what happens next! You can't leave people in suspense, you know. Or, you can, but you see, in human life, suspense is one of the worst things there can be. It's terrible, awful, sad, when we only have a limited time, to be cut short at any moment, to leave someone hanging, waiting, waiting... clinging to a thread!
[Suddenly he stops what he's doing.]
Oh, no, it's an amazing feeling! To teeter at that point, on the brink of crashing, for as long as you possibly can! Heh... hahaha...
[He bends forward until he's nearly folded over, body wracked with laughter, hugging the wrench to his chest.]
Hahaha... hahahahahaha-!
[Then he abruptly falls silent, looking up slowly between his fingers. The remaining parts of the tractor tremble and collapse to the ground all at once with a cacophony of metal.]
But really, I thought this place had more of a flair for drama.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Fiyero Tigelaar
Series: The Wicked Years, specifically Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West
Age: 18
Canon: Somewhere over the rainbow in the fantastic land of Oz, Animals talk, magic really works, and one green girl is embarking on the painful journey that will see her grow up to be the Wicked Witch of the West. Her first stop is Shiz University, a prestigious school in the heart of Oz, where our young protagonist Elphaba makes her first few friends.
One of those friends is Fiyero Tigelaar, a young prince who knows very well what it's like to be different. Raised in the barbarous wilds of the Vinkus, he's mocked and shunned by the students at Shiz because of his strange accent, unusual clothing, and most of all because of his dark, tattooed skin. But Fiyero is patient, open and friendly, and seems to be able to win his way into everyone's heart. Polite, thoughtful, and gentle to a fault, he takes just about anything in his stride - apart from almost being killed by magicked antlers, which to be fair would upset most people. He seems an unlikely candidate to lead a tribe of barbarians, but if anyone can civilize the Vinkus people, it will be this charming prince.
Note: Lurline is a goddess in Oz, whose name often substitutes for the real-world exclamation of 'oh God!'
Sample Post:
Excuse me, sir? ...madam? I apologize for intruding, but I was wondering if you could direct me towards a lady named Miss Marcy. I am given to understand that she's rather well-known, so I had hoped...it's been a very long journey. Until now I had thought I knew most of what might be expected in Oz, but I'm coming to believe that perhaps on the evidence I'm no longer in Oz.
Well, you see, there are certainly legends of Gorillas in the Vinkus, but the descriptions usually referred to black fur, rather than purple. And while Animals do often wear clothing, it seemed rather odd that the Gorilla I met should have a red cloak and nothing else. He seemed proud of it, though - he kept opening and closing it to show me how fashionable it was, although I admit I didn't entirely understand the gestures he kept making towards his legs. Between his legs, I should say, perhaps. He was kind enough to offer me his basket of food, but I'm afraid Gorillas must eat very different things to people. I've never before seen such unusual inclusions in a meal. Eyeballs are a delicacy here, perhaps? The Birds did seem very interested in them, and the Gorilla was so insistent that I take the basket - to his grandmother, I think - it sounded as though she were unwell.
I never did find his grandmother, though the Birds tried to help, and sang me instructions on where to go. They told me we were off to see Miss Marcy, the Confounding Colossus of Camp, and that I ought to follow this road through the cornfields - and they pointed out to me a Scarecrow that we passed, and told me that he had won something known as a Nobel prize, for being outstanding in his field. And, although they had to leave before I reached you, they did tell me of the best way to greet Miss Marcy, and where I could find her. It seems she is my only hope for getting directions to return home; when I asked the Birds, they told me to click my heels, and laughed so hard that one of them...
...there are ladies present, so I shan't elaborate. I thank you for bringing me this far, and for being so kind to a lost traveller. Now, as the Birds instructed:
Miss Marcy, Miss Marcy, let down your h - oh sweet Lurline!
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Jin Kisaragi
Series: BlazBlue
Character Age: ~19-21.
Canon: In an alternate future, the world has been thrown into peril due to the appearance of a powerful monster known as the Black Beast. Thanks to the help of six heroes fighting to hold off the Beast, mankind was able to use a fusion of science and magic to create weapons known as Ars Magus, ultimately using them to defeat the threat. Following these events, an organization called the Novus Orbis Librarium (aka the NOL) was formed to regulate the use of Ars Magus. However, since the NOL is essentially a military force, it has its fair share of opposition. The most notorious rebel out to destroy the NOL is Ragna the Bloodedge, commonly known as the “Grim Reaper.” He's the owner of the Azure Grimoire “BlazBlue,” the most powerful Ars Magus in existence. So, logically, they try to hunt him down.
Cold as the ice sword he wields, Jin is a Major in the NOL. He's honored as a "hero" even though all he did was follow the NOL's orders. So it comes as a surprise to his superiors when he suddenly abandons his duties to pursue Ragna. To most people, Jin appears to be unapproachable; he's calm and collected, and he's curt when he speaks. He's rarely unnerved even when faced with unexpected surprises, and he's practical, indifferent to praises and prestige. Underneath his stoic exterior, Jin has harsh opinions for people in general. He finds them repulsive and irritating, especially those he finds weak. Although he tries to avoid them, he'll become hostile if they become an obstacle. However in a complete contrast to his usual self, Jin behaves in a demented, childlike way when he's confronting Ragna, gleeful about fighting him. He has a one track mind when it comes to finding the Grim Reaper, and is willing to put himself through any obstacle, even obvious traps, if it means finding him. He affectionately claims that the only thing that can make him feel "alive" is the thought of killing Ragna and he'll furiously cut down whoever gets in the way of this bad bromance.
Note: Characters in BlazBlue narrates their story through inner monologue, which includes their thoughts and feelings on situations. Jin is being apped with his Japanese voice in mind.
Sample Post:
I was suddenly assigned to be stationed at a new branch of the NOL; specifically I was ordered to train the new recruits. The assignment also said they were a bunch of apes. I assumed it meant that they were imbeciles, but it turns out they were literally a bunch of gorillas. The idiocy still applies, however. Although I declined, the apes were insistent on throwing me a welcoming party. The party itself was more revolting than "welcoming". People in general disgust me, but the serving staff at the party disgusted me even more: they smelt horrible, maggots were crawling in their skin, and parts of their body kept falling into the food. I excused myself early because I couldn't stomach staying at that so called party longer than I had to, but apparently those gorillas weren't finished with being a nuisance.
The next day they interrupted the training session to give me a car as another welcoming gift. I wasn't interested in listening to their reasoning, but they wasted my time by telling me about it anyway. They explained with their crude body language that they thought that I would like to ride a Nissan. Despite my best efforts, I couldn't begin to fathom what could possess their inferior primate minds into thinking that I was interested in obtaining an automobile, let alone care what brand it was. And even if I were interested, how did those foolish apes expect me to drive the vehicle when there are more cornfields than roads in this damn place? Their presumptuous and forceful behavior towards me was steadily growing from a minor irritation to a full annoyance. In fact, I wouldn't have hesitated to deal with them then as they tried to usher me into the car had they not reported to me that the Grim Reaper was in the area.
At that moment, a chill ran down my spine. Could it be? Was he really here? Excitement rushed through me as if a bind had been loosened, allowing me to feel again. If I could meet him again. . . If I could meet Ragna in this hellhole it would more than make up for all the foolishness I've had to go through since coming here. I was excited to anticipate the kind of expression he would make when he saw me. Would it be happy? Would it be sad? Or would it be that heated expression of hatred? I wondered if he would be as excited as I am at the thought of me sinking my blade into him. However, to my utter disappointment, what awaited me there wasn't Ragna. It was an impostor, a mere scarecrow crudely dressed up by those bastard gorillas. My disappointment turned into rage that they had the nerve to set up such a cheap mockery of someone important to me. How dare they? How dare they. . .!? Did they really want to incur my wrath so much that they would commit this unforgivable crime?
Hell was a warm welcome for them by the time I was through.
Poll Vote!
Character: Noel Vermillion
Series: BlazBlue
Character Age: ~17-18.
Canon: In the future, governing the world is the Novus Orbis Librarium (NOL or Librarium for short) whose sole purpose is to keep balance in the world and safeguard the Ars Magus, weapons created from science and magic that was once used to tame an ancient threat. However, there are many people who aren’t cool with their tyrannical control and a prime example is Ragna the Bloodedge. He goes around destroying NOL branches with an Ars Magus known as the Azure Grimoire, “BlazBlue”, supposedly the most powerful Ars Magus in existence. This leads to Ragna becoming the most wanted man currently, with a hefty price on his head which encourages vigilantes, the NOL, and everyone around into trying to capture him.
Enter Noel Vermillion, who is introduced when she is assigned to make Major Jin Kisaragi of the NOL, her superior, return to his post when he goes AWOL for unknown reasons. She does her best to look calm and collected for her job, but the truth of the matter is that she’s the exact opposite. She’s clumsy, she’s shy, she stutters, she has self-confidence issues (ex. her chest size), heck, she prefers to order things online just to avoid talking to people in-person. Despite all this, Noel is a kind hearted girl who loves her family, friends, writing poems, and has a soft spot for things that are fluffy and cute. There’s even a possibility of her being deeper than she looks. Too bad her best just never seems to be enough in the end, though, what with her failing horribly at her work. There’s just no such thing as nice things apparently.
Sample Post:
Our current assignment is that we are supposed to come to this new branch and train the new recruits. I was nervous at first, ahaha... Actually, I’m still nervous. I just wanted to try and get to know everyone! But they’re really intimidating and I couldn’t even say a single thing properly... I’m sure I’ve made a bad impression now and they probably think I’m rude or that I don’t like them. . . B-But, it’s not like that! It’s just that they’re so huge, hairy, and they smell! I-I never thought that all the new recruits would be gorillas! S-Speaking of rude, it’s not like I was the only one! Some of them started ignoring me after a while! So I’m not completely in the wrong… Right? I kind of don’t want to be here now...
But I can't just abandon the assignment! ... Which is what I want to say, but I got lost somehow. I was supposed to follow one of the gorillas to the meeting place of the training spot but in the end I got distracted by the...g-giant squid... I was following him but then I saw these tentacles coming from a silo! They were so slimy and gross and, and... Without thinking, I started attacking it but then it just got angrier! I, I never thought I would see so many tentacles in my life... I ended up running away after that since I just knew that I wanted to get as far away as possible from it! And before I knew it, I was lost. They actually have something like that here...! Why would they do that? Is it some sort of new defense mechanism? If it is, I can’t say that I really care for it... It can’t be used in defense since it attacked me didn’t it?! But I can't actually say that or else I'll be the one in trouble with my superiors... Plus I’m supposed to be a Lieutenant but I can’t even handle a squid. What’s worse is that I actually ran away from it. If they find out about that, I’ll definitely be in trouble especially since it’s like abandoning my job.
So I decided to try and ask the locals for directions. I mean, that's what anyone would do, right? As long as I didn't give out any classified information then it should be just fine! But I couldn't understand what the locals were saying... I, um, guess that happens when you're rotting and the only thing you can say is "brrraaaaiiins"... Z-Zombies... Why are all of these here? Zombies, gorillas, and giant squids; are these supposed to help in defense? Wouldn’t it be nicer to have something like a panda! Or a puppy! Those are cute and fluffy, ehehehe... I can just imagine their ears, their tails, waaaah, so fluffy. Aaaah, that would make everything around here so much more blissful... Ah, I mean-! B-But that’s impossible, this is supposed to be a military base, Noel, not a pet zoo! But it’d still be really cute... T-That aside, in the end, I gave him a pen and paper so that maybe he could write the directions down at least. Instead he gave me...
There is a lot you lack.
Not only in brains.
But a rack.
- How could he write something that rude!? All I did was ask for directions, he didn't need to pick on me about that! Why is it that getting something nice is so difficult?
Poll Vote!
Character: Aoyagi Masamune
Series: Clone Baby
Character Age: 19
Canon: Once upon a time, just for the lulz (and in the interests of science), eleven clones were created to play a psychological game of musical chairs. They are controlled by a magnet-like force that draws them to the other clones, wherever they may be. If they encounter a clone who shares the same genes, the pair will instinctively fight and try to kill each other. Several clones have already been found murdered with their organs removed, and no one knows who is responsible. The clones' ultimate mission is to kill all the others, take the last "chair," and win the game. Somehow that chair ended up in the hands of Aoyagi Masamune.
Masamune was failing school, frequently getting beaten up by bullies, and had trouble at home. Eventually it all became too much for him. Just when he was about to end his life by jumping off a building, a mysterious man showed up and pushed him off the edge instead. That's when Masamune's real problems started. This was super-troll Kikuchi Hiro, another clone who wants Masamune dead and is trying to steal his girlfriend. Now, Masamune can't be sure of who he is any more or even if he's really still alive. He struggles to face up to the fact that to survive the game he'll have to kill all the remaining clones. When he isn't running from other clones, Masamune is a normal enough guy. His self-esteem is pretty low and because he's insecure, he often lashes out at people without really meaning to. Ultimately, he cares about his family and girlfriend, and wants his life back. If there's a way to get his fellow clones out of the picture and end the craziness, he's determined to find it.
Sample Post:
Hey! Let me in. Just open the door. I need somewhere to hide. It's not like you were here first - alright, yes, actually you were. Never mind about that now, I'm in trouble. There are people outside trying to kill me. I'm serious. You can't miss them. They're a weird colour, they smell funny, and they keep saying "draaaaaains" for some reason. Maybe they fell down a drain and that's why they smell like that? They were pretty slow. I managed to outrun them, but I know they're only minutes away from us. You have to help me!
Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I don't mean to come in here and kick you out but there isn't enough room for two of us. You're pretty big, if you don't mind me saying. Why are you hiding in a storage closet anyway? You're a gorilla, don’t you want to sit in a tree or something? Don't worry, I won’t tell anyone you're here. I know you must have gone through terrible things wherever you came from. The brochure said that Camp Flee from Ur Doom is the safest place in the world to hide from your enemies, and no camper is ever judged on their personal circumstances. Someone like you must have some scary people to run away from. They even turned you purple!
Could you take your paw off of my back, please? It's not very comfortable in here. You should ask for a cabin. I had one when I first came to camp but I can't hide there now. I'd have to go outside and then those guys that keep saying "draaaains" would find me. I don't even think it's my cabin any more. My roommate moved in. I wouldn't mind him being a robotic cow but then he sneezed and set fire to the bed ... Stop laughing! Don't be so loud. I said, there are people coming to kill me at any moment. They'll hear you. They'll probably kill you too so you can’t tell anybody what you saw ...
... Did you hear that? That's them! They're right outside the door. What are we going to do now? Oh, wait, I don't think it's "drains" they're saying. What's that? Brains? They're going to take our brains! That's it, you can talk to them. I'm staying here. No, I'm not pushing you out of the closet, I'm helping you out. Sorry!
Poll Vote!
Character: Graham Specter
Series: Baccano!
Character Age: 20-ish
Canon: Baccano! is the story of how 1930's American gangsters end up drinking an elixir of immortality. Or maybe it's about a three-way conflict between terrorists, mobsters and delinquents aboard a transcontinental express train. Or maybe it's about a girl's attempts to convince information brokers to help her find her missing brother. Either way, the story elegantly weaves together characters and times with both heart-warming villainy and unlikely innocence. And you don't have to be immortal to enjoy life and raise the titular ruckus-everyone in this show is quite capable of doing that.
Graham Specter is no exception. He's the leader of a gang of delinquents, although how he managed that is anyone's guess, since his plans don't seem to benefit anyone but himself; he appears to be a mechanic, but he enjoys breaking things rather than fixing them. Mostly, Graham's just crazy. His monologues are violently unpredictable-Graham yells, rambles, repeats himself, leaps from one subject to another with wild non sequiturs, hits things or people with his wrench at random, and just when you think he's managed a bit of almost-coherent philosophy, he cheerfully contradicts himself in the next sentence. It's all okay for Graham as long as there's a fun story to be told, and his gang aren't his friends or underlings so much as his audience.
Sample Post:
[There is a man in blue coveralls sitting on the hood of a tractor. He has a wrench half the size of his body, which he is flipping in the air casually.]
Aah~! Let me spin you a sad, sad tale, a a tale of love and of peace. You see, I heard the director here had a love, the love of her life, the loss of the life of which meant she dedicated her life to forever altering the lives of others. That's what this place is, right? Aah, it's a brilliant backdrop, the all-consuming despair that drives her to impossibilities, to pull people apart, to tear people from their very universes! I like to break things, you know, but I don't think I've ever broken universes. Still, it's an appropriate setting for the stories I, Graham Specter, have to tell. But-!
[Abruptly he jumps, swinging the wrench wildly and smashing the tractor's windshield.]
That story's over now, isn't it? The lovers have been united! It's a happy ending. Well, happy and sad. Happy for them, and sad for us, that is. Because we're still here! Or, still somewhere. Still trapped, anyway, trapped in our peaceful idyll, our timeless prison, with our gently waving fields of corn and our rotting dead things that fall apart before you even touch them! That's not very fun, is it? No! No, no, no, no, no!
[He turns to the tractor, wrench in one hand and smaller tools in the other, hands moving swiftly, undoing bolts and prying loose metal. One huge wheel falls loose, then another. He keeps working while he talks.]
Ah, the story has to move forward. I have to move it forward! But how can I move it forward, when I'm stuck in time like everyone else? Aah, it's sad! It's so sad I can barely bear it, even when I'm doing what I like best-and I am doing what I like best, because what I like best is taking apart physical things. Disassembling, dismantling, deconstructing, destroying... Oh, D is a good letter. But not as good as another letter would be-A letter from the Director, a letter that tells me what happens next! You can't leave people in suspense, you know. Or, you can, but you see, in human life, suspense is one of the worst things there can be. It's terrible, awful, sad, when we only have a limited time, to be cut short at any moment, to leave someone hanging, waiting, waiting... clinging to a thread!
[Suddenly he stops what he's doing.]
Oh, no, it's an amazing feeling! To teeter at that point, on the brink of crashing, for as long as you possibly can! Heh... hahaha...
[He bends forward until he's nearly folded over, body wracked with laughter, hugging the wrench to his chest.]
Hahaha... hahahahahaha-!
[Then he abruptly falls silent, looking up slowly between his fingers. The remaining parts of the tractor tremble and collapse to the ground all at once with a cacophony of metal.]
But really, I thought this place had more of a flair for drama.
Poll Vote!
Character name: Fiyero Tigelaar
Series: The Wicked Years, specifically Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West
Age: 18
Canon: Somewhere over the rainbow in the fantastic land of Oz, Animals talk, magic really works, and one green girl is embarking on the painful journey that will see her grow up to be the Wicked Witch of the West. Her first stop is Shiz University, a prestigious school in the heart of Oz, where our young protagonist Elphaba makes her first few friends.
One of those friends is Fiyero Tigelaar, a young prince who knows very well what it's like to be different. Raised in the barbarous wilds of the Vinkus, he's mocked and shunned by the students at Shiz because of his strange accent, unusual clothing, and most of all because of his dark, tattooed skin. But Fiyero is patient, open and friendly, and seems to be able to win his way into everyone's heart. Polite, thoughtful, and gentle to a fault, he takes just about anything in his stride - apart from almost being killed by magicked antlers, which to be fair would upset most people. He seems an unlikely candidate to lead a tribe of barbarians, but if anyone can civilize the Vinkus people, it will be this charming prince.
Note: Lurline is a goddess in Oz, whose name often substitutes for the real-world exclamation of 'oh God!'
Sample Post:
Excuse me, sir? ...madam? I apologize for intruding, but I was wondering if you could direct me towards a lady named Miss Marcy. I am given to understand that she's rather well-known, so I had hoped...it's been a very long journey. Until now I had thought I knew most of what might be expected in Oz, but I'm coming to believe that perhaps on the evidence I'm no longer in Oz.
Well, you see, there are certainly legends of Gorillas in the Vinkus, but the descriptions usually referred to black fur, rather than purple. And while Animals do often wear clothing, it seemed rather odd that the Gorilla I met should have a red cloak and nothing else. He seemed proud of it, though - he kept opening and closing it to show me how fashionable it was, although I admit I didn't entirely understand the gestures he kept making towards his legs. Between his legs, I should say, perhaps. He was kind enough to offer me his basket of food, but I'm afraid Gorillas must eat very different things to people. I've never before seen such unusual inclusions in a meal. Eyeballs are a delicacy here, perhaps? The Birds did seem very interested in them, and the Gorilla was so insistent that I take the basket - to his grandmother, I think - it sounded as though she were unwell.
I never did find his grandmother, though the Birds tried to help, and sang me instructions on where to go. They told me we were off to see Miss Marcy, the Confounding Colossus of Camp, and that I ought to follow this road through the cornfields - and they pointed out to me a Scarecrow that we passed, and told me that he had won something known as a Nobel prize, for being outstanding in his field. And, although they had to leave before I reached you, they did tell me of the best way to greet Miss Marcy, and where I could find her. It seems she is my only hope for getting directions to return home; when I asked the Birds, they told me to click my heels, and laughed so hard that one of them...
...there are ladies present, so I shan't elaborate. I thank you for bringing me this far, and for being so kind to a lost traveller. Now, as the Birds instructed:
Miss Marcy, Miss Marcy, let down your h - oh sweet Lurline!
Poll Vote!