(no subject)
I PUT PANTS ON JUST TO POST THIS. I am not 100% sure why but now I feel professional and ready to roll.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now PARTY. That'll do, pig. That'll do.
Character: Shiro Fujimoto
Series: Ao no Exorcist
Character Age: around 50
Job: camp priest/exorcist
Canon: The world of Ao no Exorcist is not a pretty one to live in. Demons frequently possess anything from people to plants to even dust particles, and only the Exorcists are able to vanquish them. Not only that, but stronger demons-like Satan-actually destroy the bodies they possess, since no body is strong enough to contain them. In an effort to cross over to the realm of humans, Satan created a half-human son, who theoretically would be strong enough to serve as a living vessel for his mighty demon spirit. Unfortunately for him, that half-human son just happened to be adopted and raised by the most badass Exorcist ever, Shiro Fujimoto.
At a first glance, Fujimoto doesn't look like much of a priest: he's loud, unprofessional, rough around the edges, a touch perverted, and pretty straightforward about his opinions of people. It may be surprising to hear that he holds the highest rank given to any Exorcist, since he really doesn't seem like the type. However, he's one of the most reasonable, albeit unorthodox, Exorcists in the Order. While his fellow Exorcists see the world in black-and-white, Fujimoto knows that not everything is as simple as that, and he does his best to find solutions that make everyone happy- including demons. Because of this, he tends to ignore his orders and do whatever he thinks will get the best results, even if those orders are something along the lines of 'kill Satan's offspring.' But while Fujimoto's methods may be unusual, he is not incompetent by any means. He's considered the strongest Exorcist alive for a damn good reason, and while he does try to use words instead of weapons whenever he can, he shows no mercy to anyone that tries to hurt innocent people.
Note: In canon, reciting specific Bible verses will exorcise demons.
Sample Post:
Stupid fricken director, sending me out here to this crappy farm in the middle of fricken nowhere- Oh there you are! You'd think 'a giant tentacle demon on top of a silo' would be clear enough directions, but apparently there's over a dozen silos here in this hellhole of a camp. No, no, sit down right there, you're not going anywhere until I say my piece. It took me long enough to find you, I don't want to spend the rest of the night tracking you down again. And keep your tentacles to yourself, missy: I'm about two decades too old for those kinds of shenanigans.
Now then! My name is Shiro Fujimoto. I've recently been brought to camp in order to serve as both a priest and a counselor for the young folks here. I thought I had my hands full with two kids, and now I'm suddenly in charge of twenty dozen of the little monsters, and each and every one of them is worried about crap like how to get their sugar fix and who they end up with under the mistletoe. You'd think the possibility of getting infected by a ghoul would be a more serious threat, but apparently that's just a headache to them.
Speaking of headaches, I know what you've been up to. More than a few of those kids have told me about your little 'extracurricular activities.' Now I'm not one to judge, I can definitely understand the appeal of some of the young ladies running around this camp. But I'm going to be straight with you here: the director sent me here to get rid of you. She's sick and tired of your antics. And frankly, I'm getting pissed off at having to listen to these kids complain about you, which is far more important than any opinion that director has.
But hey, this doesn't have to be the end of your stay in the human world. You're not really hurting the camp outside of this one issue, so I've come here with a solution to your problems. Keep your games of 'hide the tentacle' to the willing participants, and we won't have any more troubles between us. There's bound to be at least a few people here into that kind of stuff, and I'm sure they would enjoy your talents more than the average camper. So what do you say? Want to settle our differences here and celebrate the start of your new legacy?
-You don't start a new legacy by manhandling the guy trying to make peace with you! Hey! Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me!
Poll Vote!
Character: Hara Akiha
Series: Hanazakari no Kimitachi e
Character Age: 25
Job: P.E. (Perseverance and Endurance) Counselor
Canon: Everyone has dreams when they're young! Some people wish to become famous celebrities, others want to travel all around the world. And then there's Ashiya Mizuki who only wants to be close to her high jump idol, Sano Izumi. Simple, right? Or so it would have been if the dream in question didn't involve Mizuki flying from America to Japan and cutting her hair to be able to crossdress and get into the all-boys school Sano is currently attending.
Surprisingly enough, Mizuki's plan ends up working to the extent that only a few people are actually aware of her real gender. Among these people we find Hara Akiha, a somewhat eccentric, world famous photographer with a sweet tooth who has her work for him on a couple of occasions. When in a good disposition, Akiha can be playful, easygoing, and cheerful, but get on his bad side and he becomes a terrifying man with a sharp tongue who shows no mercy to even the best of top models. Though some people could tell you his scariness extends well beyond his job, what with his habit of climbin' up doctor's windows, snatchin' little traps up, and... taking them both on cute dates with him. There's no point in fighting it anyway, since Akiha never takes no for an answer.
Sample Post:
Okay! Attention everyone! I need you to pay attention to me or we won't get anything done today. I know most people hate P.E. when they're in school, but this is a different kind of P.E! Don't wooorry, I won't be making you run laps around the duck pond or doing warm-ups and stretching with the gorillas. My P.E. stands for Perseverance and Endurance: Two qualities that will take you as far as you want in your lives... and, er, afterlives, as well. In certain campers' cases.
You might not think I'm qualified for this job, since photography is what I have the most experience with, but in reality the two can be closely related! See, perseverance is all about fighting for the things you want-in my case, it could be a particular model! Ah. But I mean that in the strictly professional sense... mostly. I-In any case, the art of Never Giving Up is not easy to master, and to be fair there are many things even the strongest will won't achieve. But you won't know what those are until you’ve tried absolutely everything.
And that's where endurance comes into play! There is a Japanese proverb that says "fall seven times, stand up eight", and it perfectly illustrates my point. Think of your goal as a beautiful princess atop a high tower, and of yourselves as the valiant princes who will come to their rescue. ♥ It's a long way up and it won't be easy, but unless you keep getting back up after every fall, you'll never make it. Though please remember to use moderation and know your own limits; climbing up into someone's window can get really painful with a sprained ankle and two broken ribs. Just trust me on this one.
Anyway, let's get to the action, shall we? For our first practice session, we'll make use of our friends the zombies-the undead embodiment of perseverance and endurance! Each of you will have a zombie partner for the day, who will, naturally, chase after you wherever you go. Take this as an opportunity to learn from them, experience in the flesh the true powers of resolve and stamina, and then put this knowledge to use in your own lives. Oh, and if for some reason your partner doesn't seem too interested in your, ah, ideas, you can always pin some mistletoe onto your shirts. It'll make the challenge a lot more exciting, don't you think~?
Poll Vote!
Character: Charles Xavier (a.k.a. Professor X)
Series: X-Men: First Class (movie)
Character Age: 30
Job: Camper/Telepathic-Toucan Unity Show Choir Director
Canon: Have you ever felt... different? Like you just didn't fit in? Based on the classic comic book series, X-Men: First Class takes us back to 1962 and tells the story of an emerging minority: mutants, people whose "differences" are things like "can shoot lasers out of his eyes" or "has blue skin and a tail." Mostly, though, mutants are people struggling with being hated and feared just for being themselves. Enter one Charles Xavier, a geeky TOTALLY GROOVY Oxford University graduate who just wanted to drink beer, hit on girls with his one nerdy pick-up routine, and study genetics -- and who also happened to be an incredibly powerful telepath. Then, the CIA came seeking his scientific expertise regarding rumors of people with super-evolved powers. Seeing the opportunity to both find other mutants like himself and change society's view of mutants for the better, he jumped at the chance -- and the rest is history. (Literally. Did you know that the Cuban Missile Crisis was caused by mutants? Trufax.)
Witty, cheerful, and compassionate, Charles is dedicated to peaceful relations between humans and mutants. While his idealism and aristocratic manner can make him seem naive, he's resolute and no fool. He's also hardly flawless -- his arrogance and privilege have tripped him up more than once, and his usual articulateness provides him no immunity against some horrible flare-ups of foot-in-mouth syndrome. But even huge blows to both his heart and body -- being betrayed and left wheelchair-bound by his dearest friend -- aren't about to cause him to abandon the struggle for harmony between humanity and mutantkind. After all, mutants were just born this way, and Charles has faith that it will get better.
Sample Entry:
First of all, I will not be popping a wheelie, so we can all stop distracting ourselves with that thought. Neither am I inviting advice or assistance in "pimping my ride," as groovy as that idea sounds. While one day I probably will seek an upgrade to my current chair, please content your minds with the knowledge that for now, I have no need to be defying gravity. As with many things, sometimes it’s best to take it one step at a time- figuratively speaking, and learn to crawl before you walk, so to speak... In any case, this is hardly the reason that I’m here.
My name is Charles Xavier, and I am to lead this show choir dedicated to fostering a greater understanding between our native population and our campers. I will be the first to confess to you that I have no musical training whatsoever, but that's why you're here. We need your voices, both the ones that sing out to the world and the one that are here inside our heads. The real voices inside our heads, I should note. Don't trust the ones that you think you hear telling you that anything having to do with your Welsh classmate's sheep doesn't count after the tenth beer.
If we could all please open our music folders -- the physical ones, everyone. Toucans, no peeking through your neighbours' optical nerves. Please make sure that you have everything, which according to this list is "I Am What I Am," "I Will Survive," and "We Are Family." And if you’ll pardon my saying as much, from someone who’s a little behind the times here, it’s fantastic to see that the future has such wonderful musical options that fit our theme so very well.
Also, as we get started, I would like to remind our toucan friends that it is very bad etiquette to inflict one's earworms on everyone within projecting range, no matter how appropriate "La la la la la la la la I can't get you out of my head" may strike you. I expect a little respect and an appropriate level of focus given the significance of this endeavor to create harmony between the difference factions here. And to the rest of you, I know that this is the first time that some of you have ever directly worked with telepaths. I understand that it might be intimidating, particularly for those of you lacking in any sort of similarly heightened ability, and I do know of the history of this camp's toucans not always being particularly kind.
Remember, my friends: you are beautiful, in every single way. Birds can't bring you down.
Poll Vote!
Character: Carver Hawke
Series: Dragon Age II
Character Age: 25
Job: Camp Counselor for Lesser Sibling Complex Recovery
Canon: Note: For the purposes of this app, the Champion will be referred to as Marian Hawke - the female protagonist option.
Thedas was teetering on the brink of global war for centuries - a world balancing precariously between government, religious dictation and those oppressed by each. Throw in dragon-slaying, medieval knights and a never ending plague and you have the recipe for Dragon Age II. When Marian Hawke, a refugee nobody, by one happenstance after another, rises up from the dirty back alleys of violent, seedy Kirkwall to rock the world to it's core, sending it soaring from it's comfortable perch on the edge of chaos, a Chantry Seeker goes looking for answers to the puzzle of her past that led a world to war. Amongst those pieces is Carver Hawke - younger brother to the Champion and one of the framework structure of friends and family within her shadow, supporting her each in their own quirky, roundabout ways.
However, while some found the spot well fitted, Carver saw it as the constant source of his life's ire, even since childhood. Carver Hawke is the poster boy for the stereotypically petulant, annoying, whiny baby brother figure, right down to the 'mommy loves you more' complex and the constant attempts at one-upping. His personal motto is "if at first you don’t succeed: Blame Marian" and that nasty chip on his shoulder granted him 'sarcastic hostility' as a default. You can always be sure to rely on Carver for obnoxious, rambling, often slightly foul-mouthed complaints, be it offering up a snide comment or delivering not-so-passive aggressive humor. Beyond the judgmental scowling and critical monologuing, he's just looking to step from his sister's shadow and prove to the world he's worth something - someone aside from 'The Champion’s Little Brother'. Snark and complaints aside, Carver won't hesitate to throw himself into the fray should a family member's well-being appear to be in jeopardy.
Sample Entry:
You’d think this 'camp' must be in some kind of desperation or under-budgeting if they're looking to hire on people completely unqualified for rubbish like this. You'd also think if you write someone with a job offering you'd have some sort of interest in ensuring they actually get there in one piece and unmolested. ...In every sense of the term. Not that I'm not pleased as Andraste-blessed punch over being stranded in a remote crop field in the middle of Maker bloody smite me if I know where, chatting up such a fine gentleman as yourself. Sadly... missing your left ear. Along with half your blighted face. Really. Practically a sodding vacation spot. Aside from that awkward gnawing routine you’ve got going on. Cannibalism, believe or not, is not something most people are into these days. Nor is a lack of conversation skills. There's only so many retorts that can be made to counter "Braaaaaaiiinsss."
If you think you can manage to hold off on your attempts to gum off my arm for a few moments, I'd like to run a few things by you while we're waiting for the tentacles and, Maker preserve me so that I might keep from losing my everloving mind, gorillas, to get bored of hunting for me. Disregarding the fact I'm near certain my being here has something to do with a certain dearly beloved sister of mine and her incessant need to drag all those unfortunate unwilling around her into every ridiculous situation that crosses her path - I've been assigned a job. 'Counselor for Lesser Sibling Complex Recovery'. Charming, right? Remind me to remind this Lady Sayre what a bloody tit she is for that one later. 'S fine, I'll be the bigger person. Insulting as it is, a job's a job and right after meeting this director, and graciously informing her where exactly she may shove it, I'll be sure to recite my finely prepared lecture. Which you'll be first to preview. Lucky you.
Right then, ahem: The first step is Acceptance. That's how this kind of fodder usually goes, isn't it? Some kind of three step procedure ending with ultimate happiness? You cannot change the fact your elder sibling's a colossal, self-important, priggish ass who prances about like queen of the blighted-- Sorry. Rambling. So you'll have to accept and move on. Preferably to another city. Another kingdom, even better. However, some things in life can not be changed - such as blood relations - so you've to learn some coping methods. Ones I've found exceedingly useful is a redirection of frustration through clever, oh, I wouldn't call it 'pranks', really, so much as... A deep value for evening the score. Try exchanging bathing products with bizarre alchemical ingredients - I've heard Eye of Newt does wonders for the complexion. Or, assisting him or her with the grooming of their eyebrows by simply shaving the blighted things off in the night. You'll get the sweet satisfaction of their horrified shrieks in the morning and they'll get to try out a new haircut that hides their forehead. Bonding experiences, all around.
So. What'd you think? Too wordy? Maker, I'm shit at this anyways. How about I just cut all that and, instead, add in: Inform Dear Sibling that you've arranged a vacation in tropical paradise as a gift of appreciation for having such a sickeningly perfect role model all these years. Secretly send them to a remote, uninhabited island far from civilization. Wallow in self-satisfaction. Rinse, and repeat.
Poll Vote!
Character: Toudou Heisuke
Series: Peace Maker Kurogane
Character Age: 23
Job: Bad Decisions Coach
Canon: Peace Maker Kurogane is a manga that follows Ichimura Tetsunosuke, a teenager who wishes to join the Shinsengumi so he can learn the ways of the sword, become stronger, and, oh yeah, take vengeance upon the one who killed his family. You know, the usual! The manga is a coming-of-age story as Tetsunosuke works to find his place in the world and what it means to be a part of the Shinsengumi during that particular turmultuous time period. Fortunately, several officers of the Shinsengumi take a shine to him and help him out along the way, including three mischievous captains known as the "Comedian Trio." Not surprisingly, they end up being more of a bad influence on him than really actually teaching him anything.
The youngest of the trio is the captain of the Eighth unit, Toudou Heisuke. Whimsical and light-hearted, Heisuke is a relaxed, humorous type who would rather be casual than fit a solemn, uptight mold. When he speaks, he's quick with his words, taking on a more lax tone than one would expect from someone of his rank. He also happens to have a fondness for small, cute things, and has a tendency to speak before thinking -- a habit that's caused him some trouble. A member since the group's formation, Heisuke is initially very gung-ho about the Shinsengumi's mission. In fact, it's only when the code of the Shinsengumi is questioned that he drops his playful air and actually becomes irritated. He does, in fact, have a serious, more introspective side that he covers up with his ridiculousness, although towards the end of the series, that begins to crumble. But no matter what happens, Heisuke always remains fiercely loyal to his friends in the Shinsengumi, and is willing to put his life on the line for them.
Sample Post:
Heyyyy there, kids! You're all looking a little gray and green around the edges, but not to worry! Heisuke, your "Bad Decisions Coach," is here! ... that's me, okay, that's me as your new instructor. Come on! Don't stare at me slack-jawed -- or no-jawed -- like you didn't know what I was leading up to with all of that! See, this is why you need me! Your terrible skin conditions and various, er, problems with your mouths are clearly the results of bad decisions! And while I'm not an expert at making them per se, I am absolutely skilled at fixing the damage they cause! So, sit back and soak in Great Teacher Heisuke's words of wisdom.
First! Your speech. It needs ... work. I mean, it's true that you can't make nearly as many poor choices when your only response to "does this kimono make me look fat?" is "braaaaains." But! There's always the danger of people reading into the subtext we all know just isn't there. "Brains" could be seen as code for "sure, why not!", and the next thing you know, you're an accomplice in a crazed uprising! And believe me, rioting in the streets is never as neat as it sounds. So, let's try getting some actual words in there! Stand up for yourselves! Stay your ground! Get those tongues waggling-- no, you know, I can see where that's going with some of you, and we're going to stop that particular train of thought right there. You, put that back in your mouth. The rest of you -- we're getting parchment later and writing our ground-standing down.
But first, let's use this as a learning experience! See, that right there is a really, really bad decision as demonstrated by your good friend, er ... let's call him "Gout." Gout thought it would be hilarious to take my tongue turn of phrase to a literal level, and now he lacks the dexterity to put it back in his mouth where it belongs. I need to point out that that gag is never funny -- and as a proud prankster, I know my stuff! -- and he had that coming. Still! He's my pupil and as his coach or whatever, I am sort of obligated to offer advice and aid to our dear yet doltish Gout. So, let's exploit this little learning experience! Gout, when you find yourself a victim of your own bad decisions, the best thing to do is suck up your pride and ask your friends for help. Get on your knees if you have to!
--I. On your knees, get on them, not give them to-- you know what, no. I had that coming, huh.
Change of plans, my quasi-adorable but half-witted pupils! Here's a new lesson -- learn from your mistakes! That's the best advice I can pass on without any of you misconstruing it terribly. Er, probably. With a little bit of "braaaaaains," you too can discover for yourselves how to cope with and move on from the terrible life choices tha-- it was a play on what you always say, don't grab your heads and-- there's nothing cute about any of this at all! This entire job is a bad decision!
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me why I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now PARTY. That'll do, pig. That'll do.
Character: Shiro Fujimoto
Series: Ao no Exorcist
Character Age: around 50
Job: camp priest/exorcist
Canon: The world of Ao no Exorcist is not a pretty one to live in. Demons frequently possess anything from people to plants to even dust particles, and only the Exorcists are able to vanquish them. Not only that, but stronger demons-like Satan-actually destroy the bodies they possess, since no body is strong enough to contain them. In an effort to cross over to the realm of humans, Satan created a half-human son, who theoretically would be strong enough to serve as a living vessel for his mighty demon spirit. Unfortunately for him, that half-human son just happened to be adopted and raised by the most badass Exorcist ever, Shiro Fujimoto.
At a first glance, Fujimoto doesn't look like much of a priest: he's loud, unprofessional, rough around the edges, a touch perverted, and pretty straightforward about his opinions of people. It may be surprising to hear that he holds the highest rank given to any Exorcist, since he really doesn't seem like the type. However, he's one of the most reasonable, albeit unorthodox, Exorcists in the Order. While his fellow Exorcists see the world in black-and-white, Fujimoto knows that not everything is as simple as that, and he does his best to find solutions that make everyone happy- including demons. Because of this, he tends to ignore his orders and do whatever he thinks will get the best results, even if those orders are something along the lines of 'kill Satan's offspring.' But while Fujimoto's methods may be unusual, he is not incompetent by any means. He's considered the strongest Exorcist alive for a damn good reason, and while he does try to use words instead of weapons whenever he can, he shows no mercy to anyone that tries to hurt innocent people.
Note: In canon, reciting specific Bible verses will exorcise demons.
Sample Post:
Stupid fricken director, sending me out here to this crappy farm in the middle of fricken nowhere- Oh there you are! You'd think 'a giant tentacle demon on top of a silo' would be clear enough directions, but apparently there's over a dozen silos here in this hellhole of a camp. No, no, sit down right there, you're not going anywhere until I say my piece. It took me long enough to find you, I don't want to spend the rest of the night tracking you down again. And keep your tentacles to yourself, missy: I'm about two decades too old for those kinds of shenanigans.
Now then! My name is Shiro Fujimoto. I've recently been brought to camp in order to serve as both a priest and a counselor for the young folks here. I thought I had my hands full with two kids, and now I'm suddenly in charge of twenty dozen of the little monsters, and each and every one of them is worried about crap like how to get their sugar fix and who they end up with under the mistletoe. You'd think the possibility of getting infected by a ghoul would be a more serious threat, but apparently that's just a headache to them.
Speaking of headaches, I know what you've been up to. More than a few of those kids have told me about your little 'extracurricular activities.' Now I'm not one to judge, I can definitely understand the appeal of some of the young ladies running around this camp. But I'm going to be straight with you here: the director sent me here to get rid of you. She's sick and tired of your antics. And frankly, I'm getting pissed off at having to listen to these kids complain about you, which is far more important than any opinion that director has.
But hey, this doesn't have to be the end of your stay in the human world. You're not really hurting the camp outside of this one issue, so I've come here with a solution to your problems. Keep your games of 'hide the tentacle' to the willing participants, and we won't have any more troubles between us. There's bound to be at least a few people here into that kind of stuff, and I'm sure they would enjoy your talents more than the average camper. So what do you say? Want to settle our differences here and celebrate the start of your new legacy?
-You don't start a new legacy by manhandling the guy trying to make peace with you! Hey! Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me!
Poll Vote!
Character: Hara Akiha
Series: Hanazakari no Kimitachi e
Character Age: 25
Job: P.E. (Perseverance and Endurance) Counselor
Canon: Everyone has dreams when they're young! Some people wish to become famous celebrities, others want to travel all around the world. And then there's Ashiya Mizuki who only wants to be close to her high jump idol, Sano Izumi. Simple, right? Or so it would have been if the dream in question didn't involve Mizuki flying from America to Japan and cutting her hair to be able to crossdress and get into the all-boys school Sano is currently attending.
Surprisingly enough, Mizuki's plan ends up working to the extent that only a few people are actually aware of her real gender. Among these people we find Hara Akiha, a somewhat eccentric, world famous photographer with a sweet tooth who has her work for him on a couple of occasions. When in a good disposition, Akiha can be playful, easygoing, and cheerful, but get on his bad side and he becomes a terrifying man with a sharp tongue who shows no mercy to even the best of top models. Though some people could tell you his scariness extends well beyond his job, what with his habit of climbin' up doctor's windows, snatchin' little traps up, and... taking them both on cute dates with him. There's no point in fighting it anyway, since Akiha never takes no for an answer.
Sample Post:
Okay! Attention everyone! I need you to pay attention to me or we won't get anything done today. I know most people hate P.E. when they're in school, but this is a different kind of P.E! Don't wooorry, I won't be making you run laps around the duck pond or doing warm-ups and stretching with the gorillas. My P.E. stands for Perseverance and Endurance: Two qualities that will take you as far as you want in your lives... and, er, afterlives, as well. In certain campers' cases.
You might not think I'm qualified for this job, since photography is what I have the most experience with, but in reality the two can be closely related! See, perseverance is all about fighting for the things you want-in my case, it could be a particular model! Ah. But I mean that in the strictly professional sense... mostly. I-In any case, the art of Never Giving Up is not easy to master, and to be fair there are many things even the strongest will won't achieve. But you won't know what those are until you’ve tried absolutely everything.
And that's where endurance comes into play! There is a Japanese proverb that says "fall seven times, stand up eight", and it perfectly illustrates my point. Think of your goal as a beautiful princess atop a high tower, and of yourselves as the valiant princes who will come to their rescue. ♥ It's a long way up and it won't be easy, but unless you keep getting back up after every fall, you'll never make it. Though please remember to use moderation and know your own limits; climbing up into someone's window can get really painful with a sprained ankle and two broken ribs. Just trust me on this one.
Anyway, let's get to the action, shall we? For our first practice session, we'll make use of our friends the zombies-the undead embodiment of perseverance and endurance! Each of you will have a zombie partner for the day, who will, naturally, chase after you wherever you go. Take this as an opportunity to learn from them, experience in the flesh the true powers of resolve and stamina, and then put this knowledge to use in your own lives. Oh, and if for some reason your partner doesn't seem too interested in your, ah, ideas, you can always pin some mistletoe onto your shirts. It'll make the challenge a lot more exciting, don't you think~?
Poll Vote!
Character: Charles Xavier (a.k.a. Professor X)
Series: X-Men: First Class (movie)
Character Age: 30
Job: Camper/Telepathic-Toucan Unity Show Choir Director
Canon: Have you ever felt... different? Like you just didn't fit in? Based on the classic comic book series, X-Men: First Class takes us back to 1962 and tells the story of an emerging minority: mutants, people whose "differences" are things like "can shoot lasers out of his eyes" or "has blue skin and a tail." Mostly, though, mutants are people struggling with being hated and feared just for being themselves. Enter one Charles Xavier, a geeky TOTALLY GROOVY Oxford University graduate who just wanted to drink beer, hit on girls with his one nerdy pick-up routine, and study genetics -- and who also happened to be an incredibly powerful telepath. Then, the CIA came seeking his scientific expertise regarding rumors of people with super-evolved powers. Seeing the opportunity to both find other mutants like himself and change society's view of mutants for the better, he jumped at the chance -- and the rest is history. (Literally. Did you know that the Cuban Missile Crisis was caused by mutants? Trufax.)
Witty, cheerful, and compassionate, Charles is dedicated to peaceful relations between humans and mutants. While his idealism and aristocratic manner can make him seem naive, he's resolute and no fool. He's also hardly flawless -- his arrogance and privilege have tripped him up more than once, and his usual articulateness provides him no immunity against some horrible flare-ups of foot-in-mouth syndrome. But even huge blows to both his heart and body -- being betrayed and left wheelchair-bound by his dearest friend -- aren't about to cause him to abandon the struggle for harmony between humanity and mutantkind. After all, mutants were just born this way, and Charles has faith that it will get better.
Sample Entry:
First of all, I will not be popping a wheelie, so we can all stop distracting ourselves with that thought. Neither am I inviting advice or assistance in "pimping my ride," as groovy as that idea sounds. While one day I probably will seek an upgrade to my current chair, please content your minds with the knowledge that for now, I have no need to be defying gravity. As with many things, sometimes it’s best to take it one step at a time- figuratively speaking, and learn to crawl before you walk, so to speak... In any case, this is hardly the reason that I’m here.
My name is Charles Xavier, and I am to lead this show choir dedicated to fostering a greater understanding between our native population and our campers. I will be the first to confess to you that I have no musical training whatsoever, but that's why you're here. We need your voices, both the ones that sing out to the world and the one that are here inside our heads. The real voices inside our heads, I should note. Don't trust the ones that you think you hear telling you that anything having to do with your Welsh classmate's sheep doesn't count after the tenth beer.
If we could all please open our music folders -- the physical ones, everyone. Toucans, no peeking through your neighbours' optical nerves. Please make sure that you have everything, which according to this list is "I Am What I Am," "I Will Survive," and "We Are Family." And if you’ll pardon my saying as much, from someone who’s a little behind the times here, it’s fantastic to see that the future has such wonderful musical options that fit our theme so very well.
Also, as we get started, I would like to remind our toucan friends that it is very bad etiquette to inflict one's earworms on everyone within projecting range, no matter how appropriate "La la la la la la la la I can't get you out of my head" may strike you. I expect a little respect and an appropriate level of focus given the significance of this endeavor to create harmony between the difference factions here. And to the rest of you, I know that this is the first time that some of you have ever directly worked with telepaths. I understand that it might be intimidating, particularly for those of you lacking in any sort of similarly heightened ability, and I do know of the history of this camp's toucans not always being particularly kind.
Remember, my friends: you are beautiful, in every single way. Birds can't bring you down.
Poll Vote!
Character: Carver Hawke
Series: Dragon Age II
Character Age: 25
Job: Camp Counselor for Lesser Sibling Complex Recovery
Canon: Note: For the purposes of this app, the Champion will be referred to as Marian Hawke - the female protagonist option.
Thedas was teetering on the brink of global war for centuries - a world balancing precariously between government, religious dictation and those oppressed by each. Throw in dragon-slaying, medieval knights and a never ending plague and you have the recipe for Dragon Age II. When Marian Hawke, a refugee nobody, by one happenstance after another, rises up from the dirty back alleys of violent, seedy Kirkwall to rock the world to it's core, sending it soaring from it's comfortable perch on the edge of chaos, a Chantry Seeker goes looking for answers to the puzzle of her past that led a world to war. Amongst those pieces is Carver Hawke - younger brother to the Champion and one of the framework structure of friends and family within her shadow, supporting her each in their own quirky, roundabout ways.
However, while some found the spot well fitted, Carver saw it as the constant source of his life's ire, even since childhood. Carver Hawke is the poster boy for the stereotypically petulant, annoying, whiny baby brother figure, right down to the 'mommy loves you more' complex and the constant attempts at one-upping. His personal motto is "if at first you don’t succeed: Blame Marian" and that nasty chip on his shoulder granted him 'sarcastic hostility' as a default. You can always be sure to rely on Carver for obnoxious, rambling, often slightly foul-mouthed complaints, be it offering up a snide comment or delivering not-so-passive aggressive humor. Beyond the judgmental scowling and critical monologuing, he's just looking to step from his sister's shadow and prove to the world he's worth something - someone aside from 'The Champion’s Little Brother'. Snark and complaints aside, Carver won't hesitate to throw himself into the fray should a family member's well-being appear to be in jeopardy.
Sample Entry:
You’d think this 'camp' must be in some kind of desperation or under-budgeting if they're looking to hire on people completely unqualified for rubbish like this. You'd also think if you write someone with a job offering you'd have some sort of interest in ensuring they actually get there in one piece and unmolested. ...In every sense of the term. Not that I'm not pleased as Andraste-blessed punch over being stranded in a remote crop field in the middle of Maker bloody smite me if I know where, chatting up such a fine gentleman as yourself. Sadly... missing your left ear. Along with half your blighted face. Really. Practically a sodding vacation spot. Aside from that awkward gnawing routine you’ve got going on. Cannibalism, believe or not, is not something most people are into these days. Nor is a lack of conversation skills. There's only so many retorts that can be made to counter "Braaaaaaiiinsss."
If you think you can manage to hold off on your attempts to gum off my arm for a few moments, I'd like to run a few things by you while we're waiting for the tentacles and, Maker preserve me so that I might keep from losing my everloving mind, gorillas, to get bored of hunting for me. Disregarding the fact I'm near certain my being here has something to do with a certain dearly beloved sister of mine and her incessant need to drag all those unfortunate unwilling around her into every ridiculous situation that crosses her path - I've been assigned a job. 'Counselor for Lesser Sibling Complex Recovery'. Charming, right? Remind me to remind this Lady Sayre what a bloody tit she is for that one later. 'S fine, I'll be the bigger person. Insulting as it is, a job's a job and right after meeting this director, and graciously informing her where exactly she may shove it, I'll be sure to recite my finely prepared lecture. Which you'll be first to preview. Lucky you.
Right then, ahem: The first step is Acceptance. That's how this kind of fodder usually goes, isn't it? Some kind of three step procedure ending with ultimate happiness? You cannot change the fact your elder sibling's a colossal, self-important, priggish ass who prances about like queen of the blighted-- Sorry. Rambling. So you'll have to accept and move on. Preferably to another city. Another kingdom, even better. However, some things in life can not be changed - such as blood relations - so you've to learn some coping methods. Ones I've found exceedingly useful is a redirection of frustration through clever, oh, I wouldn't call it 'pranks', really, so much as... A deep value for evening the score. Try exchanging bathing products with bizarre alchemical ingredients - I've heard Eye of Newt does wonders for the complexion. Or, assisting him or her with the grooming of their eyebrows by simply shaving the blighted things off in the night. You'll get the sweet satisfaction of their horrified shrieks in the morning and they'll get to try out a new haircut that hides their forehead. Bonding experiences, all around.
So. What'd you think? Too wordy? Maker, I'm shit at this anyways. How about I just cut all that and, instead, add in: Inform Dear Sibling that you've arranged a vacation in tropical paradise as a gift of appreciation for having such a sickeningly perfect role model all these years. Secretly send them to a remote, uninhabited island far from civilization. Wallow in self-satisfaction. Rinse, and repeat.
Poll Vote!
Character: Toudou Heisuke
Series: Peace Maker Kurogane
Character Age: 23
Job: Bad Decisions Coach
Canon: Peace Maker Kurogane is a manga that follows Ichimura Tetsunosuke, a teenager who wishes to join the Shinsengumi so he can learn the ways of the sword, become stronger, and, oh yeah, take vengeance upon the one who killed his family. You know, the usual! The manga is a coming-of-age story as Tetsunosuke works to find his place in the world and what it means to be a part of the Shinsengumi during that particular turmultuous time period. Fortunately, several officers of the Shinsengumi take a shine to him and help him out along the way, including three mischievous captains known as the "Comedian Trio." Not surprisingly, they end up being more of a bad influence on him than really actually teaching him anything.
The youngest of the trio is the captain of the Eighth unit, Toudou Heisuke. Whimsical and light-hearted, Heisuke is a relaxed, humorous type who would rather be casual than fit a solemn, uptight mold. When he speaks, he's quick with his words, taking on a more lax tone than one would expect from someone of his rank. He also happens to have a fondness for small, cute things, and has a tendency to speak before thinking -- a habit that's caused him some trouble. A member since the group's formation, Heisuke is initially very gung-ho about the Shinsengumi's mission. In fact, it's only when the code of the Shinsengumi is questioned that he drops his playful air and actually becomes irritated. He does, in fact, have a serious, more introspective side that he covers up with his ridiculousness, although towards the end of the series, that begins to crumble. But no matter what happens, Heisuke always remains fiercely loyal to his friends in the Shinsengumi, and is willing to put his life on the line for them.
Sample Post:
Heyyyy there, kids! You're all looking a little gray and green around the edges, but not to worry! Heisuke, your "Bad Decisions Coach," is here! ... that's me, okay, that's me as your new instructor. Come on! Don't stare at me slack-jawed -- or no-jawed -- like you didn't know what I was leading up to with all of that! See, this is why you need me! Your terrible skin conditions and various, er, problems with your mouths are clearly the results of bad decisions! And while I'm not an expert at making them per se, I am absolutely skilled at fixing the damage they cause! So, sit back and soak in Great Teacher Heisuke's words of wisdom.
First! Your speech. It needs ... work. I mean, it's true that you can't make nearly as many poor choices when your only response to "does this kimono make me look fat?" is "braaaaains." But! There's always the danger of people reading into the subtext we all know just isn't there. "Brains" could be seen as code for "sure, why not!", and the next thing you know, you're an accomplice in a crazed uprising! And believe me, rioting in the streets is never as neat as it sounds. So, let's try getting some actual words in there! Stand up for yourselves! Stay your ground! Get those tongues waggling-- no, you know, I can see where that's going with some of you, and we're going to stop that particular train of thought right there. You, put that back in your mouth. The rest of you -- we're getting parchment later and writing our ground-standing down.
But first, let's use this as a learning experience! See, that right there is a really, really bad decision as demonstrated by your good friend, er ... let's call him "Gout." Gout thought it would be hilarious to take my tongue turn of phrase to a literal level, and now he lacks the dexterity to put it back in his mouth where it belongs. I need to point out that that gag is never funny -- and as a proud prankster, I know my stuff! -- and he had that coming. Still! He's my pupil and as his coach or whatever, I am sort of obligated to offer advice and aid to our dear yet doltish Gout. So, let's exploit this little learning experience! Gout, when you find yourself a victim of your own bad decisions, the best thing to do is suck up your pride and ask your friends for help. Get on your knees if you have to!
--I. On your knees, get on them, not give them to-- you know what, no. I had that coming, huh.
Change of plans, my quasi-adorable but half-witted pupils! Here's a new lesson -- learn from your mistakes! That's the best advice I can pass on without any of you misconstruing it terribly. Er, probably. With a little bit of "braaaaaains," you too can discover for yourselves how to cope with and move on from the terrible life choices tha-- it was a play on what you always say, don't grab your heads and-- there's nothing cute about any of this at all! This entire job is a bad decision!
Poll Vote!