(no subject)
You know, we kind of like this overlapping the rounds thing. We're plowing right through the apps at a productive pace, and this means camper apps open up again a lot faster! So KEEP UP YOUR VOTING~
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Miriallia Haww
Series: Gundam SEED/Destiny
Character Age: 18
Canon: A brave, straightforward girl with a kind heart and an at times, sarcastic sense of humor, Miriallia was caught up in the Big Emo Gundam war alongside her friends. She worked as a volunteer communications officer on the series' main battleship, the Archangel, until offered an opportunity to leave. Instead of taking advantage of it, she chose to officially enlist and support her friends. Though hit hard by the death of her boyfriend Tolle, she recovered with renewed strength and maturity to continue fighting the war, more dedicated than ever.
Two years later, she worked as a freelance photographer until a chance encounter with Athrun led her to rejoining the Archangel. Still headstrong, kind, and passionate in her beliefs for a better future, she once again set her civilian life aside to support her friends through a new conflict.
"This is going to be the biggest scoop ever," they told me. Seems that way, but just how many people are going to believe a headline that reads "Flesh Hungry Zombies in Prison Summer Camp"? It's either going to be the hottest thing off the press in history, or I'm going to be labeled a complete psycho by the rest of the world.
Arriving here wasn't as pleasant as I'd hoped it would be. The undead greeting party was just a little too touchy and managed to start carrying me off to "sacrifice me to the local Mafia". Thankfully, I escaped from that, but does anyone know an easy way to get brains off of a camera? Despite being given a gun upon arrival, I've never really been one for using them.
Which reminds me that I can't quite access the laptop I was given along with it. Every time I try to start it up, it gives me some password type questionnaire. "Ratio of gay pilots to gay ninjas", "How much emo does it take to produce its own life form", "UST levels of the occupants"? There were a few others that I'd rather not repeat out loud but.. what kind of questions are these?
Zombies, horrible living arrangements, and above all, a director who doesn't do a thing to help the people here? Those should be good reasons for motivation to get working on this mystery, and you all must have figured out some things to move us along, right? Either way, my name's Miriallia, and it looks like I'll be around for a while! So, does anyone have a place for me to stay in the meantime? Preferably with some room to print out some of these snapshots I've taken. Though I'm not sure what people will think of the shots involving creatures posing provocatively for the camera. I'm not even going to think about what kind of person would train a goat to do that, much less put it in lingerie.
Poll Vote!
Character: Carrot Ironfoundersson
Series: Discworld by Terry Pratchett
Character Age: 18
Canon: Carrot tends to stand out in a crowd, being a 6'6" dwarf with "godlike proportions" (the better class of gods, not those ones with all the tentacles) and fire-red hair. Well, actually, he's fully human, if you want to get into genetics. See, he was found by a family of dwarves when he was a baby, and was brought up as one of there own. All that's known from his life before them is the carriage wreck that orphaned him and the sword found along with him.
But when he hit 16, his parents sent him to the city of Ankh-Morpork to 'become a man' and live amongst his own kind. He joined the City Watch (the police force) and fit in almost too perfectly for someone who stuck out like a sore thumb in the rough city of Ankh-Morpork, as Carrot is a genuinely kind, earnest young man. He is just very simple, but he's not stupid - a common mistake. He's enthusiastic and almost infectuously charismatic. He also believes that there is some good in everyone, and after being around him for a while, you start to believe it too, albeit maybe reluctantly.
There have been hints that Carrot is the heir to the long-unoccupied throne of Ankh-Morpork (the crown-shaped birthmark on his arm, the ancient sword he was found with, his likeness to the royal ancestry), but no one wants a King, nor does Carrot want to be King. He's happy being a police officer, and follows the law down to the last rule.
He also, like any good dwarf, writes home every week, with haphazard punctuation and random Capitalisation - I'll spare everyone the spelling mistakes.
Dear Fellow Campers,
I don't know about you, but the holiday for my health at Camp Fuck You Die (odd name, isn't it?) has continued to be interesting! I would hesitate to say relaxing or really necessary restful, but of course I am very grateful to the Patrician and my Captain for giving me this time of Rest And Relaxation. I hope that the City Watch continues fine without my help though I am a little anxious to get back.
I believe you're all familiar with our resident Undead Community. The zombies here are a little different from the ones we get back at Ankh-Morpork, but they're quite nice if you stop and talk to them, really. At first they did try to attack me, so I gave them a Stern Talking To. But upon further investigation, it came to my attention that they didn't actually know that eating brains without written permission of the brain's host is in direct violation of the Decency Ordinances of 1328 and Undead Regulations, so I chose to use my discretion.
Good thing I did too, or else we wouldn't have the Camp's first ever Zombie Soccer Team! They can't kick the ball very hard, or else their feet come off, but they shuffle amazingly well. We do need a new goalie though, the poor chap's head came clean off thanks to a vicious play from our current left forward. But otherwise it's going really well - they just needed something else to do, I think.
I think I shall encourage some fellow Camp Goers to get into it also! I understand we have a few sporting types in our midsts. We could have friendly matches. It'll be so much fun, won't it?
Hoping this finds you all in Good Health,
Carrot Ironfoundersson (Coach of the Somnambulists and Corporal of the City Watch)
Poll Vote!
Character: Amano Makoto
Series: W-Juliet (manga)
Character Age: 17
Canon: Makoto has a secret. She's really not the woman she appears to be. Born Narita Makoto, he was heir to the family dojo. His dream was to be an actor, so he and his father came to a compromise - if Makoto could finish high school as a girl without anyone realizing, he would be released from his obligations. He's been helped on his way by his sisters (primarily Akane, the makeup artist who has taught him everything he knows) and Miura Ito, his new best friend and now, girlfriend. Together, they fight crime!
Makoto is polite and pleasant, and is really very popular at his new school. He's usually quite perceptive about things and how people are feeling. He can also be terribly stubborn when it comes to what he wants and about his father. In the end, he will do anything for his dream of becoming an actor, and really respects the dreams of others. This can sometimes lead to complete stupidity as he shows that he is, in fact, male, to people he doesn't necessarily know. He's started to open up and be more fun since his first year of high school as a girl, and this is primarily due to Ito's influence.
Makoto is being taken from pre-volume 9.
If there was anything that I should've learned by this point, it's that I should rarely go along with anything my father proposes.
Ah, I was under the impression that this was an acting camp? My brochure had some notes written in it... "Play your role in a murder mystery in the bayou!"; "Rustic living with a group of your peers!"; "As a means of deepening your acting skills: Relive your childhood as a real child, or experience a day in the life of the opposite sex!" Hmm... I'm not really certain how all of that is possible, but the murder mystery? Does anyone know about that?
The size of this place - it can't be all staged, can it? The animals, the plants, everything? Some of them must be props, but they're so lifelike. I can't say that I've ever seen anything quite like them. Are they animatronic, or? Hmm, no, I don't think so after all. Why would someone program dandelions to try and flip up someone's skirt? Please stop - no, stop. There's nothing important up there!
Speaking of rather odd things... the zombies? I don't think I read anything about this being a horror mystery. Whoever you are, playing the zombies, thank you so much. There are never any small parts, so for your role here, I can only salute you. As long as this is what you truly want to do, that is. That's also the reason I'm here - oh. That's an amazing makeup job you have, to make that ear that fell off look so real! I don't suppose you have any tips for me? I do most of my own makeup, when I'm acting, that is! ...oh. That's... amazing. I think I'll make my way over to the mess hall now, if you don't mind?
This isn't what I expected at all. We really are out in the middle of nowhere, aren't we? This seems far stranger and looks to be much more trouble than it's worth, except... I said I would. I was wondering, those purple gorillas. I can almost see them eying me with what looks like... malicious intent. Moreover, why are they arguing over where to take my luggage? I know I could carry it myself, but they were so helpful and insistent when I got here.
...Fine, fine, you can both take half, but please don't destroy more than you need to? I'm going to need some of - Oh no. That was my favorite...!
Poll Vote!
Character: Monkey D. Luffy
Series: One Piece
Character Age: 17
Canon: Where to begin? Luffy is the captain of the pirate
ship, the Going Merry and the Straw Hat pirate crew. He's also the
Rubber Man. Meaning…he's made of rubber. He ate this thing called a
Devil's Fruit when he was a kid, and it gave him the power to be extra
stretchy. He's an incredible fighter, an eternal optimist, and a very
loyal friend. He detests anyone who is dishonest or cruel, especially
when it comes to comrades (called nakama in the show). His sunny and
innocent disposition often fool others into thinking he's an idiot,
but he is actually quite smart, and if you get on his bad side, he
will beat you into the ground. With a grin. He also eats far too
much, his favorite foods being…anything, really. But mostly meat.
His great ambition in life: to become the Pirate King.
Wow! This place is so cool! I was exploring an interesting island
and decided to go south, so I went to where it felt warmer and then I
was suddenly in the middle of a swamp with alligators and really
hungry looking plants. I was right - south is better!
I think it's somewhere on the Grand Line, but everyone I talk to asks
if I'm a zombie. What are zombies, anyway? The hungry plants?
Anyway, there are some people around here who are even stranger than
the plants! They ignore me most of the time, even when I try to say
talk to them. I can't use my Gomu Gomu no Pistol move on them; they
just pick themselves up and keep walking around drooling and moaning.
Huh. Must be Mystery People.
They put me into this cabin that smells like socks, but I get a bed
and not a hammock. Which is nice. Even with the bugs. Although the
other people in my cabin threatened to feed me to the alligators
because they said I keep shouting in my sleep. Oh look! It's the
Mystery People again! Wait, why are my cabin comrades are trying to
throw me out the door? Looks like these guys are pretty funny! I
suppose I should go and say hi to the...
...
...
I smell...food...
DINNEEEEEEEEER!
Poll Vote!
Character: Nara Shikamaru
Series: Naruto
Character Age: 15
Canon: Lazy, laid-back, slacker, genius - all words can be applied equally to Shikamaru, depending on how well you know him. While not physically as strong or capable as some of his classmates, he is the first to advance to chuunin (a second level ninja) owing to his ability to read the situations and make quick judgement calls in the middle of his chuunin fights. He is very loyal to his teammates, Yamanaka Ino and Akimichi Chouji, and to his other friends. After nearly losing every member of his chuunin team and still failing an important mission to rescue Sasuke-in-a-barrel, Shikamaru makes the decision that he will become stronger for his teammates so that he doesn't have to risk them again.
For the most part, Shikamaru is level headed and grounded. He tends to find women irritating and annoying, and prefers to back down and walk away from any troublesome arugments they might cause. Rarely will he miss out on the subtleties of a situation; though whether or not he chooses to react to or comment on it is another matter entirely. His usual front is one of calm boredom, and he will not often display the sharp intellect that has earned him his rank and standing - if he had his way, he'd kick back and stare at the clouds all day.
Che. This whole place is nothing but trouble. Animated corpses with no one pulling the strings. They buzz around like mosquitos, annoying and always clamoring for something I'm not giving up. "Brains~" they say. Right, like anyone would stand around and let some diseased thing chew on his head for a while.
Such a pain in the ass. Lucky they can't climb. At least the rooftops are peaceful enough a place to relax.
... Or not. There's something wrong with the clouds here. I've seen all kinds of shapes in them before - bunnies, badgers, snakes. That's nothing unusual, but it's common sense that they can't suddenly move against the wind's direction and attack each other.... or rain blood. It's going to be such a pain to get it out of my clothes, and no one's convincing me that the lake is the only place to clean up.
I've already met her. Yeah, her - the tentacles in the lake. She and I don't see eye to eye on the whole lot of anything. Bossy, insistant - just like every other woman. Always invading your space when you're trying to take a quick nap in the middle of the day. Such troublesome creatures.
...
Look, I'm Nara Shikamaru. I just need someone to tell me how to get out of here. It's such a bother, but I'm in the wrong forest and need to get back before some kids get into trouble.
Poll Vote!
Character: Shindou Hikaru
Series: "Hikaru no Go"
Age: 15/16 (post series)
Canon: At the start of the series Hikaru is
your average teenage boy. In searching through his
grandfather's attic for things to sell for fast-cash
he comes upon a Go board with blood stains on them.
Shortly after making this discovery he finds that, 1)
he's the only one who can see the stains and 2) a
thousand-year-old ghost named Sai has been haunting
the board. After much 'coaxing' Hikaru decided to let
Sai play a few games, eventually becoming drawn into
it himself.
He's grown quite a bit from the brat trying to scam
money from his grandfather to the Go pro chasing after
Touya Akira (a Go player with amazing skill. In
Hikaru's first game with Akira the he actually played
against Sai, causing the formal boy to believe Shindou
was a much better player than himself). Though older
(and supposedly wiser) he can still be a brat, getting
angry over little things which usually end with him
storming out of the room. He's also easily surprised
by things and has little respect for adults.
Ugh...what is this? Damn, I slept like a rock
on the flight and don't even remember getting
off. I knew that the camp would be far from
Tokyo but there's nothing but swamp that smells like
my dirty laundry pile. That letter from Touya better
not have been a prank (though I doubt there's a funny
bone in his body - and 'lube' better be a pro term for
'Go board polish') but I don't know why he would come
here to spend his summer of all places - t'ch,
he's weird anyway. It's not even summer yet - the
hell's he thinking?
Hm, I wonder if there will be other kids who play Go?
Well, if he's here there must be a-erk! Damn
gorilla! That's my luggage - no, my clothes!
Mom's gonna freak if she finds out a giant
monkey stole my underwear... C'mon, be a nice
monkey and-
...Of course it would throw them into
the lake. Bastard.
Well, fine - who needs clean underwear! I'll
just send a letter to mom and get her to mail me some
- (Gah, clothes too; there's no way I'm going
after them) - and everything will work out. Right?
Right. C'mon, Hikaru! A day at a time, one step-
...Right into gorilla shit. Perfect.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kyon
Series: The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
Character Age: 15
Canon: Before meeting Haruhi Suzumiya, Kyon is an normal student just entering high school, having traded in the daydreams and delusions of childhood for snark, and prepared to simply live an ordinary life. But after meeting Haruhi Suzumiya and having the distinct misfortune of giving her the idea to form the SOS-dan, or "SOS Brigade" (a school club dedicated to bringing happiness to the world by seeking out new life and civilizations any interesting supernatural or paranormal events) Kyon finds himself as the only ordinary member, and spends much of his time whipped trying to keep Haruhi happy with assistance from the rest of the SOS Brigade.
Certainly, I believed that deep and dark forests were things that only existed in fantasy novels: you know, with noble heroes, evil sorcerers, and terrible destinies to be fulfilled. To those people, these forests full of fell beasts and savage creatures were no danger, but merely a minor challenge, over which they almost always triumphed, as part of a greater tale told to us ordinary mortals without special talents. But these things - sorcerers, heroes, enchanted forests - do not exist in real life, of course; I resigned myself to the reality of their nonexistence long ago. It is because of all this that I became mildly surprised when, instead of walking home from school, I found myself suddenly walking through such a mysterious forest.
Wait, mildly surprised? Who am I kidding? (Koizumi might be mildly surprised at something like this. "Ah, my. I seem to be in a forest. How troublesome!" Quit joking around!) I stopped in my tracks, my idle thoughts of the day's events abruptly replaced by petrified confusion. There I was, suddenly defenseless in the middle of a forest! I could have been attacked by a slime at any time, like a video-game character forewarned by only an alarming noise and the world appearing to blur and spiral before my eyes! No, calm down; these impossible things don't happen in reality. ...is what I would have thought, if I hadn't learnt by then how strange reality really was. If aliens, espers, and time-travelers truly existed, why not monsters and adventures on an epic 8-bit scale? ...I wonder how many bits reality is?
Being so engrossed in my thoughts, I almost didn't notice when a formal-suited zombie began to shuffle purposefully towards me. A zombie? H-hey, wait! I don't want to die! And hold on, at which point did this dream turn into a low-budget horror film? (By now, I had become convinced all this was occurring in my imagination. And yet the Freudian implications of that creature wallowing in the distant lake almost made me hope it was real...) I regretfully confess that I didn't keep my head as the zombie lost his, and a duffel bag (amongst other things) dropped to the ground at my feet with a loud thump. Several minutes later, after recovering what was left of my wits, I found a blood-stained envelope inside the duffle bag. The letter inside ominously began, "Dear Camper, welcome to Camp Fuck You Die..."
...Oh, boy.
Character: Kyon
Series: The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi
Age: 15
Canon: Kyon is intelligent, usually level-headed and deeply unimpressed by the world around him. He constantly assesses his environment and friends and subjects them to deadpan put-downs, because if he has a fault, it's an inability to shut up. In spite of his complaints, however, Kyon actually enjoys the peculiar adventures Haruhi drags him into. He also cares much more about his friends than he would ever admit.
Unlike the other main characters in the series, Kyon is entirely normal and has no special powers whatsoever (that we've seen so far, anyway). The fact that all sorts of mysterious events revolve around him anyway is one of the central puzzles in this series.
Okay, I was wondering where Haruhi was, but that doesn't mean I necessarily wanted to find out, or at least not this way. What the hell?
If I find the guy who set this up, I'm going to give him what-for, be he god or demon emperor or giant bunny robot. For starters, couldn't they have picked something a bit more classy than this B-movie scenario? Even in a camp flick there's such a thing as inventive set design. I'd like to know what kind of idiot television show this guy watches to think this is cool.
That said, I am rather prejudiced towards more of a SF setting. Like a planet orbiting a black hole, Arrakis, Alpha Centauri, that kind of thing. I'd love to go to space at least once, even if your average Joe, like me, won't be able to book flights there for at least another hundred years.
Oh well, at least like this I don't have to be worried about one crack in the wall sucking everyone and everything into the cold nothingness of the void. And being the hero of a horror movie could be interesting, so long as I'm well-armed not one of the side characters who are only used as cannon fodder! I can't say that my life has been an uninterrupted sequence of joy and wonder so far, but all the same, I don't want to die yet.
...Damn! I got distracted by these asinine speculations again and now the slobbering extras have come out! Haruhi, where are you, you idiot?!
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
Now VOTE. Closed!
Character: Miriallia Haww
Series: Gundam SEED/Destiny
Character Age: 18
Canon: A brave, straightforward girl with a kind heart and an at times, sarcastic sense of humor, Miriallia was caught up in the Big Emo Gundam war alongside her friends. She worked as a volunteer communications officer on the series' main battleship, the Archangel, until offered an opportunity to leave. Instead of taking advantage of it, she chose to officially enlist and support her friends. Though hit hard by the death of her boyfriend Tolle, she recovered with renewed strength and maturity to continue fighting the war, more dedicated than ever.
Two years later, she worked as a freelance photographer until a chance encounter with Athrun led her to rejoining the Archangel. Still headstrong, kind, and passionate in her beliefs for a better future, she once again set her civilian life aside to support her friends through a new conflict.
"This is going to be the biggest scoop ever," they told me. Seems that way, but just how many people are going to believe a headline that reads "Flesh Hungry Zombies in Prison Summer Camp"? It's either going to be the hottest thing off the press in history, or I'm going to be labeled a complete psycho by the rest of the world.
Arriving here wasn't as pleasant as I'd hoped it would be. The undead greeting party was just a little too touchy and managed to start carrying me off to "sacrifice me to the local Mafia". Thankfully, I escaped from that, but does anyone know an easy way to get brains off of a camera? Despite being given a gun upon arrival, I've never really been one for using them.
Which reminds me that I can't quite access the laptop I was given along with it. Every time I try to start it up, it gives me some password type questionnaire. "Ratio of gay pilots to gay ninjas", "How much emo does it take to produce its own life form", "UST levels of the occupants"? There were a few others that I'd rather not repeat out loud but.. what kind of questions are these?
Zombies, horrible living arrangements, and above all, a director who doesn't do a thing to help the people here? Those should be good reasons for motivation to get working on this mystery, and you all must have figured out some things to move us along, right? Either way, my name's Miriallia, and it looks like I'll be around for a while! So, does anyone have a place for me to stay in the meantime? Preferably with some room to print out some of these snapshots I've taken. Though I'm not sure what people will think of the shots involving creatures posing provocatively for the camera. I'm not even going to think about what kind of person would train a goat to do that, much less put it in lingerie.
Poll Vote!
Character: Carrot Ironfoundersson
Series: Discworld by Terry Pratchett
Character Age: 18
Canon: Carrot tends to stand out in a crowd, being a 6'6" dwarf with "godlike proportions" (the better class of gods, not those ones with all the tentacles) and fire-red hair. Well, actually, he's fully human, if you want to get into genetics. See, he was found by a family of dwarves when he was a baby, and was brought up as one of there own. All that's known from his life before them is the carriage wreck that orphaned him and the sword found along with him.
But when he hit 16, his parents sent him to the city of Ankh-Morpork to 'become a man' and live amongst his own kind. He joined the City Watch (the police force) and fit in almost too perfectly for someone who stuck out like a sore thumb in the rough city of Ankh-Morpork, as Carrot is a genuinely kind, earnest young man. He is just very simple, but he's not stupid - a common mistake. He's enthusiastic and almost infectuously charismatic. He also believes that there is some good in everyone, and after being around him for a while, you start to believe it too, albeit maybe reluctantly.
There have been hints that Carrot is the heir to the long-unoccupied throne of Ankh-Morpork (the crown-shaped birthmark on his arm, the ancient sword he was found with, his likeness to the royal ancestry), but no one wants a King, nor does Carrot want to be King. He's happy being a police officer, and follows the law down to the last rule.
He also, like any good dwarf, writes home every week, with haphazard punctuation and random Capitalisation - I'll spare everyone the spelling mistakes.
Dear Fellow Campers,
I don't know about you, but the holiday for my health at Camp Fuck You Die (odd name, isn't it?) has continued to be interesting! I would hesitate to say relaxing or really necessary restful, but of course I am very grateful to the Patrician and my Captain for giving me this time of Rest And Relaxation. I hope that the City Watch continues fine without my help though I am a little anxious to get back.
I believe you're all familiar with our resident Undead Community. The zombies here are a little different from the ones we get back at Ankh-Morpork, but they're quite nice if you stop and talk to them, really. At first they did try to attack me, so I gave them a Stern Talking To. But upon further investigation, it came to my attention that they didn't actually know that eating brains without written permission of the brain's host is in direct violation of the Decency Ordinances of 1328 and Undead Regulations, so I chose to use my discretion.
Good thing I did too, or else we wouldn't have the Camp's first ever Zombie Soccer Team! They can't kick the ball very hard, or else their feet come off, but they shuffle amazingly well. We do need a new goalie though, the poor chap's head came clean off thanks to a vicious play from our current left forward. But otherwise it's going really well - they just needed something else to do, I think.
I think I shall encourage some fellow Camp Goers to get into it also! I understand we have a few sporting types in our midsts. We could have friendly matches. It'll be so much fun, won't it?
Hoping this finds you all in Good Health,
Carrot Ironfoundersson (Coach of the Somnambulists and Corporal of the City Watch)
Poll Vote!
Character: Amano Makoto
Series: W-Juliet (manga)
Character Age: 17
Canon: Makoto has a secret. She's really not the woman she appears to be. Born Narita Makoto, he was heir to the family dojo. His dream was to be an actor, so he and his father came to a compromise - if Makoto could finish high school as a girl without anyone realizing, he would be released from his obligations. He's been helped on his way by his sisters (primarily Akane, the makeup artist who has taught him everything he knows) and Miura Ito, his new best friend and now, girlfriend. Together, they fight crime!
Makoto is polite and pleasant, and is really very popular at his new school. He's usually quite perceptive about things and how people are feeling. He can also be terribly stubborn when it comes to what he wants and about his father. In the end, he will do anything for his dream of becoming an actor, and really respects the dreams of others. This can sometimes lead to complete stupidity as he shows that he is, in fact, male, to people he doesn't necessarily know. He's started to open up and be more fun since his first year of high school as a girl, and this is primarily due to Ito's influence.
Makoto is being taken from pre-volume 9.
If there was anything that I should've learned by this point, it's that I should rarely go along with anything my father proposes.
Ah, I was under the impression that this was an acting camp? My brochure had some notes written in it... "Play your role in a murder mystery in the bayou!"; "Rustic living with a group of your peers!"; "As a means of deepening your acting skills: Relive your childhood as a real child, or experience a day in the life of the opposite sex!" Hmm... I'm not really certain how all of that is possible, but the murder mystery? Does anyone know about that?
The size of this place - it can't be all staged, can it? The animals, the plants, everything? Some of them must be props, but they're so lifelike. I can't say that I've ever seen anything quite like them. Are they animatronic, or? Hmm, no, I don't think so after all. Why would someone program dandelions to try and flip up someone's skirt? Please stop - no, stop. There's nothing important up there!
Speaking of rather odd things... the zombies? I don't think I read anything about this being a horror mystery. Whoever you are, playing the zombies, thank you so much. There are never any small parts, so for your role here, I can only salute you. As long as this is what you truly want to do, that is. That's also the reason I'm here - oh. That's an amazing makeup job you have, to make that ear that fell off look so real! I don't suppose you have any tips for me? I do most of my own makeup, when I'm acting, that is! ...oh. That's... amazing. I think I'll make my way over to the mess hall now, if you don't mind?
This isn't what I expected at all. We really are out in the middle of nowhere, aren't we? This seems far stranger and looks to be much more trouble than it's worth, except... I said I would. I was wondering, those purple gorillas. I can almost see them eying me with what looks like... malicious intent. Moreover, why are they arguing over where to take my luggage? I know I could carry it myself, but they were so helpful and insistent when I got here.
...Fine, fine, you can both take half, but please don't destroy more than you need to? I'm going to need some of - Oh no. That was my favorite...!
Poll Vote!
Character: Monkey D. Luffy
Series: One Piece
Character Age: 17
Canon: Where to begin? Luffy is the captain of the pirate
ship, the Going Merry and the Straw Hat pirate crew. He's also the
Rubber Man. Meaning…he's made of rubber. He ate this thing called a
Devil's Fruit when he was a kid, and it gave him the power to be extra
stretchy. He's an incredible fighter, an eternal optimist, and a very
loyal friend. He detests anyone who is dishonest or cruel, especially
when it comes to comrades (called nakama in the show). His sunny and
innocent disposition often fool others into thinking he's an idiot,
but he is actually quite smart, and if you get on his bad side, he
will beat you into the ground. With a grin. He also eats far too
much, his favorite foods being…anything, really. But mostly meat.
His great ambition in life: to become the Pirate King.
Wow! This place is so cool! I was exploring an interesting island
and decided to go south, so I went to where it felt warmer and then I
was suddenly in the middle of a swamp with alligators and really
hungry looking plants. I was right - south is better!
I think it's somewhere on the Grand Line, but everyone I talk to asks
if I'm a zombie. What are zombies, anyway? The hungry plants?
Anyway, there are some people around here who are even stranger than
the plants! They ignore me most of the time, even when I try to say
talk to them. I can't use my Gomu Gomu no Pistol move on them; they
just pick themselves up and keep walking around drooling and moaning.
Huh. Must be Mystery People.
They put me into this cabin that smells like socks, but I get a bed
and not a hammock. Which is nice. Even with the bugs. Although the
other people in my cabin threatened to feed me to the alligators
because they said I keep shouting in my sleep. Oh look! It's the
Mystery People again! Wait, why are my cabin comrades are trying to
throw me out the door? Looks like these guys are pretty funny! I
suppose I should go and say hi to the...
...
...
I smell...food...
DINNEEEEEEEEER!
Poll Vote!
Character: Nara Shikamaru
Series: Naruto
Character Age: 15
Canon: Lazy, laid-back, slacker, genius - all words can be applied equally to Shikamaru, depending on how well you know him. While not physically as strong or capable as some of his classmates, he is the first to advance to chuunin (a second level ninja) owing to his ability to read the situations and make quick judgement calls in the middle of his chuunin fights. He is very loyal to his teammates, Yamanaka Ino and Akimichi Chouji, and to his other friends. After nearly losing every member of his chuunin team and still failing an important mission to rescue Sasuke-in-a-barrel, Shikamaru makes the decision that he will become stronger for his teammates so that he doesn't have to risk them again.
For the most part, Shikamaru is level headed and grounded. He tends to find women irritating and annoying, and prefers to back down and walk away from any troublesome arugments they might cause. Rarely will he miss out on the subtleties of a situation; though whether or not he chooses to react to or comment on it is another matter entirely. His usual front is one of calm boredom, and he will not often display the sharp intellect that has earned him his rank and standing - if he had his way, he'd kick back and stare at the clouds all day.
Che. This whole place is nothing but trouble. Animated corpses with no one pulling the strings. They buzz around like mosquitos, annoying and always clamoring for something I'm not giving up. "Brains~" they say. Right, like anyone would stand around and let some diseased thing chew on his head for a while.
Such a pain in the ass. Lucky they can't climb. At least the rooftops are peaceful enough a place to relax.
... Or not. There's something wrong with the clouds here. I've seen all kinds of shapes in them before - bunnies, badgers, snakes. That's nothing unusual, but it's common sense that they can't suddenly move against the wind's direction and attack each other.... or rain blood. It's going to be such a pain to get it out of my clothes, and no one's convincing me that the lake is the only place to clean up.
I've already met her. Yeah, her - the tentacles in the lake. She and I don't see eye to eye on the whole lot of anything. Bossy, insistant - just like every other woman. Always invading your space when you're trying to take a quick nap in the middle of the day. Such troublesome creatures.
...
Look, I'm Nara Shikamaru. I just need someone to tell me how to get out of here. It's such a bother, but I'm in the wrong forest and need to get back before some kids get into trouble.
Poll Vote!
Character: Shindou Hikaru
Series: "Hikaru no Go"
Age: 15/16 (post series)
Canon: At the start of the series Hikaru is
your average teenage boy. In searching through his
grandfather's attic for things to sell for fast-cash
he comes upon a Go board with blood stains on them.
Shortly after making this discovery he finds that, 1)
he's the only one who can see the stains and 2) a
thousand-year-old ghost named Sai has been haunting
the board. After much 'coaxing' Hikaru decided to let
Sai play a few games, eventually becoming drawn into
it himself.
He's grown quite a bit from the brat trying to scam
money from his grandfather to the Go pro chasing after
Touya Akira (a Go player with amazing skill. In
Hikaru's first game with Akira the he actually played
against Sai, causing the formal boy to believe Shindou
was a much better player than himself). Though older
(and supposedly wiser) he can still be a brat, getting
angry over little things which usually end with him
storming out of the room. He's also easily surprised
by things and has little respect for adults.
Ugh...what is this? Damn, I slept like a rock
on the flight and don't even remember getting
off. I knew that the camp would be far from
Tokyo but there's nothing but swamp that smells like
my dirty laundry pile. That letter from Touya better
not have been a prank (though I doubt there's a funny
bone in his body - and 'lube' better be a pro term for
'Go board polish') but I don't know why he would come
here to spend his summer of all places - t'ch,
he's weird anyway. It's not even summer yet - the
hell's he thinking?
Hm, I wonder if there will be other kids who play Go?
Well, if he's here there must be a-erk! Damn
gorilla! That's my luggage - no, my clothes!
Mom's gonna freak if she finds out a giant
monkey stole my underwear... C'mon, be a nice
monkey and-
...Of course it would throw them into
the lake. Bastard.
Well, fine - who needs clean underwear! I'll
just send a letter to mom and get her to mail me some
- (Gah, clothes too; there's no way I'm going
after them) - and everything will work out. Right?
Right. C'mon, Hikaru! A day at a time, one step-
...Right into gorilla shit. Perfect.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kyon
Series: The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya
Character Age: 15
Canon: Before meeting Haruhi Suzumiya, Kyon is an normal student just entering high school, having traded in the daydreams and delusions of childhood for snark, and prepared to simply live an ordinary life. But after meeting Haruhi Suzumiya and having the distinct misfortune of giving her the idea to form the SOS-dan, or "SOS Brigade" (a school club dedicated to bringing happiness to the world by seeking out new life and civilizations any interesting supernatural or paranormal events) Kyon finds himself as the only ordinary member, and spends much of his time whipped trying to keep Haruhi happy with assistance from the rest of the SOS Brigade.
Certainly, I believed that deep and dark forests were things that only existed in fantasy novels: you know, with noble heroes, evil sorcerers, and terrible destinies to be fulfilled. To those people, these forests full of fell beasts and savage creatures were no danger, but merely a minor challenge, over which they almost always triumphed, as part of a greater tale told to us ordinary mortals without special talents. But these things - sorcerers, heroes, enchanted forests - do not exist in real life, of course; I resigned myself to the reality of their nonexistence long ago. It is because of all this that I became mildly surprised when, instead of walking home from school, I found myself suddenly walking through such a mysterious forest.
Wait, mildly surprised? Who am I kidding? (Koizumi might be mildly surprised at something like this. "Ah, my. I seem to be in a forest. How troublesome!" Quit joking around!) I stopped in my tracks, my idle thoughts of the day's events abruptly replaced by petrified confusion. There I was, suddenly defenseless in the middle of a forest! I could have been attacked by a slime at any time, like a video-game character forewarned by only an alarming noise and the world appearing to blur and spiral before my eyes! No, calm down; these impossible things don't happen in reality. ...is what I would have thought, if I hadn't learnt by then how strange reality really was. If aliens, espers, and time-travelers truly existed, why not monsters and adventures on an epic 8-bit scale? ...I wonder how many bits reality is?
Being so engrossed in my thoughts, I almost didn't notice when a formal-suited zombie began to shuffle purposefully towards me. A zombie? H-hey, wait! I don't want to die! And hold on, at which point did this dream turn into a low-budget horror film? (By now, I had become convinced all this was occurring in my imagination. And yet the Freudian implications of that creature wallowing in the distant lake almost made me hope it was real...) I regretfully confess that I didn't keep my head as the zombie lost his, and a duffel bag (amongst other things) dropped to the ground at my feet with a loud thump. Several minutes later, after recovering what was left of my wits, I found a blood-stained envelope inside the duffle bag. The letter inside ominously began, "Dear Camper, welcome to Camp Fuck You Die..."
...Oh, boy.
Character: Kyon
Series: The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi
Age: 15
Canon: Kyon is intelligent, usually level-headed and deeply unimpressed by the world around him. He constantly assesses his environment and friends and subjects them to deadpan put-downs, because if he has a fault, it's an inability to shut up. In spite of his complaints, however, Kyon actually enjoys the peculiar adventures Haruhi drags him into. He also cares much more about his friends than he would ever admit.
Unlike the other main characters in the series, Kyon is entirely normal and has no special powers whatsoever (that we've seen so far, anyway). The fact that all sorts of mysterious events revolve around him anyway is one of the central puzzles in this series.
Okay, I was wondering where Haruhi was, but that doesn't mean I necessarily wanted to find out, or at least not this way. What the hell?
If I find the guy who set this up, I'm going to give him what-for, be he god or demon emperor or giant bunny robot. For starters, couldn't they have picked something a bit more classy than this B-movie scenario? Even in a camp flick there's such a thing as inventive set design. I'd like to know what kind of idiot television show this guy watches to think this is cool.
That said, I am rather prejudiced towards more of a SF setting. Like a planet orbiting a black hole, Arrakis, Alpha Centauri, that kind of thing. I'd love to go to space at least once, even if your average Joe, like me, won't be able to book flights there for at least another hundred years.
Oh well, at least like this I don't have to be worried about one crack in the wall sucking everyone and everything into the cold nothingness of the void. And being the hero of a horror movie could be interesting, so long as I'm well-armed not one of the side characters who are only used as cannon fodder! I can't say that my life has been an uninterrupted sequence of joy and wonder so far, but all the same, I don't want to die yet.
...Damn! I got distracted by these asinine speculations again and now the slobbering extras have come out! Haruhi, where are you, you idiot?!
Poll Vote!