(no subject)
MORNING ROUND.
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed~
Character: Marmon (Viper)
Series: Katekyo Hitman Reborn!
Age: ...infant. Just roll with it.
Canon: Every family's got its black sheep, and Sawada Tsunayoshi's little corner of the mafia is no exception to this rule. The Vongola famiglia's Varia, a group of elite assassins, is like the equivalent of the drunken, rowdy cousin that you avoid seeing on holidays, but they'll do worse to you than insult your Christmas ham. These nasty characters do take their names from the seven deadly sins, after all. Baaaaaaaby Varia assassin Marmon represents the sin of Greed, and his obsession in life is money: getting it, keeping it, getting more of it, and then keeping that too. He attempts to charge people for anything he can think of (e.g. looking at him), judges how much he likes things in monetary terms, and threatens to sell people to the circus if they look promising.
As retarded as he gets about money, Marmon is an extremely intelligent tactician, the type who prefers to sit in the shadows and assess the situation. He's snarky, irritatingly superior, and a bit sexist, but cool and laid-back--more likely to chatter on about your abilities and making a buck off of them than actually throw a punch. But when push comes to shove, Marmon is a whole lot of fuckown in a one-foot-tall package; he's an immensely powerful illusionist, capable of invading the mind of an opponent and subjecting them to an imaginary world of terror that feels very, very real.
And this pint-sized magician's favorite illusion? Tentacle bondage. Hey, whoever said babies had to be innocent and pure?
Sample Post:
Muuuu...so this isn't an illusion after all. I'm almost disappointed. I'd have had fun bringing such a powerful illusionist to his knees and selling him off to the highest bidder; the circus is easy to barter with, but the slavers pay twice as much if the merchandise is pretty. But no, instead of anyone with marketable talent, you have a shambling corpse with a top hat and cane who says abracadabrains and offered to pull a rabbit out of his pants for me. Are you really stupid enough to think anyone would pay for whatever's between your legs? If any other fool here thinks they'll show me something that disgusting again, please step forward now so I can put you out of your misery. I'll even give you a discount on your own casket.
No takers? I was looking forward to using that power, but it can wait. I have a business proposition for one Elizabeth Sayre, you see. A woman in charge? That explains it; I've never once met a woman with a lick of business sense. Madam Director, how much money would you say this farce of a camp brings in annually? Where's the profit? A few tacky stuffed gorillas sold to tourists? A dozen cases of cheap cigarettes for your prisoners? Why stop there? You may not have a single illusionist here who's worth a dime, but illusions aren't the only things that sell, and it's abundantly clear that your resources are being wasted on ineffective scare tactics. The wildlife alone could bring in millions; have you never heard of Sea World? Do you have any idea how much giggling teenage girls would pay to drag their hapless dates to the lake, throw "Marcy" a few pairs of frilly little panties, and watch her go wild? It's obscene what excites people, but it's even more obscene that you're not taking advantage of it.
If you and your staff are content to slum around in this pit until you rot, I'll show myself out after collecting my consultation fee. But if I have your attention, let me continue. I could capture your Marcy myself and sell her off to the circus for a hefty chunk of change, leaving you with nothing. But for the same price--up front, of course--I'll leave her in your custody and accept the temporary role of financial advisor. Let me see what she can do, and I'll show you how to market it to the entertainment-starved masses. Marcy? Let's start by making an example of Mr. Abracadabrains here. Show me on the zombie where we can touch our audience's wallets.
--What? That's all you've got? All this publicity, and that's the best you can do? You're a disgrace to tentacles. I'll have to show you that, and don't think I won't want extra for it. You call that power? Not even a Japanese filmmaker would pay you a red cent for that. Behold my power!
Muuu. Impressed, are you, Marcy? Now you see exactly what these tentacles can bring to the yard.
I suppose I could teach you--but I'd have to charge.
Poll Vote!
Character: Noda “Nodame” Megumi
Series: Nodame Cantabile (Jdrama)
Character Age: 20
Canon: “Nodame Cantabile” folllows musical prodigy Chiaki Shinichi and the human leech he acquired named Nodame. Chiaki is a bit of a haughty perfectionist who dreams of becoming a world-renowned conductor, but his fear of flying leaves him stranded in Japan where he sulks very prettily over less-talented students getting the recognition he deserves. Nodame, on the other hand, is a slob who wants nothing more than to teach children the joys of flatulence through song and dance, and pesters Chiaki at every opportunity. Throw in some other kooky and colourful characters with a dash of slapstick comedy, and you've got the story of how these two polar-opposites manage to help each other grow.
Which is a good thing, because Nodame isn't exactly the type of person you would want teaching your children. That is, unless you want them to grow up thinking that personal hygiene isn't all that important, that they should never have to clean their rooms, and that stealing lunchboxes from their friends is perfectly acceptable. It's not that Nodame is a bad person, she just doesn't appear to possess much common sense, and she would definitely be the first person lured into a pervert's van by the promise of food and toys. She gleans all of her life lessons from Puri Gorota, an anime/manga series for children that she obsesses and goes broke over, and often utters nonsense exclamations to emphasize extreme emotions. Much to the horror of Chiaki, she falls head-over-heels for him and constantly refers to herself as his wife. Luckily, she is redeemed in the eyes of society by her undeniable talent at the piano; even if her playing style is as lively and idiosyncratic as she is!
(Nodame is being apped from the end of the Japanese Drama.)
Sample Post:
People of New France, Please donate to the “Nodame-Needs-To-Get-To-Paris” fund! It’s true that Nodame has never done busking before, but this is an act of desperation! The scholarship money from the Paris Music Conservatory was spent on Puri Gorota merchandise because they don't sell any Puri Gorota in France and Nodame will be lost without her treasures, but Nodame found a cheap flight to Louisiana in New France and will pay for passage to Paris from here! That's where Chiaki-sempai is waiting for Nodame, and sempai will start to feel lonely if Nodame doesn't get there soon. Nodame can already feel our love growing stronger from here, hauu~
New France isn't how Nodame imagined it at all though! When Gorota went to France, the girls were all wore poofy dresses, and the boys had big, curly moustaches. But Nodame can't even tell the difference between some of the boys and girls here. Everyone in the audience looks exactly the same! No, no, don't take off your clothes! Nodame will believe in whatever you say! Maybe you should all go to the hospital after the performance though. Everyone looks ready to fall apart, and that shade of gray isn't anything Nodame has ever seen on a person before!
You're not the only ones that Nodame can't tell apart though, so don't be embarrassed! Nodame came across a really pretty lady while looking for a good busking spot, only it wasn't a lady at all... Kyaah, don't look at Nodame like that, it was an accident! Nodame isn't really a peeping-pervert! Ah... but what if Nodame gets drunk one night and is tricked into relations with someone who turns out to be a trap?! And then they'll blackmail Nodame by threatening to smear her name in the tabloids as "the-beautiful-and-talented-young-pianist-who-engages-in-illicit-love-affairs"! BUT NODAME WILL BE CAREFUL TO STAY TRUE TO CHIAKI-SEMPAI AND--
GYABOU! N-Nodame will play now, so please don't throw tomatoes anymore! Or at least throw them in the pianika box so Nodame can eat them later. This feeling of hunger... it's unbearable! Anyway, Nodame learned this song from Graarrrh-san in the audience while walking around New France, so please listen carefully!
Zip a dee doo dah, Zip a dee day
My oh my what a wonderful day!
A whole pack of zombies headin’ my way,
Zip a dee doo dah, Zip a dee day!
Mister toucan on my shoulder,
Oh no! If you probe my mind
Incriminating thoughts for you to find
Zip a dee doo dah, Zip a dee day
Better go find a moogle
Umm... La-la-la-la-hey!
Thank you, thank you! Please don’t be shy! Contribute some donations to Nodame’s worthy cause!
Muykaa, that’s a rock you threw in there! Nodame can’t get to Paris using rocks! But Nodame understands what it's like to be poor, so if you don’t have money, food as alms is okay too.
G-Gyabou! Nodame said "alms", not "arms"!
Poll Vote!
Character: Yahiko Myojin
Series: Rurouni Kenshin
Age: 10
Canon: Set during the Meiji Era, Rurouni Kenshin revolves around Kenshin Himura, a manslayer turned wanderer. His travels lead him to Tokyo where he meets a dojo instructor, an ex-fighter for hire, an ex-thief, and a fox doctor. With his new companions, he fights against those who wish to destroy the peaceful era and try break his no-killing vow.
Yahiko, the descendant of a samurai family, is prideful and wishes to be viewed as an adult despite his age. He's also rude, arrogant, and cheeky. Once you get pass that though, you'll see that the kid has a strong heart and plenty of courage who fights enemies twice his size in order to protect his friends and sometimes complete strangers. In other words, he’s a short kid with a big stick and knows how to use it.
Sample Post:
So basically you're saying he dumped you? I'm not surprised. Have you looked in a mirror lately? I would reject you too if I were him. Anyways, I listened to your relationship problems, like I promised so keep your of the deal and tell me where the dojo is. When I come back home, I’m going to kill that old hag for sending me to this dump for training. And what kind of a dojo would be called Hit-Mi-Right-Thar anyway?
…Are you crying? Don’t say you aren’t because you’re not fooling anyone. Look, just because one person dumped you doesn't mean it's the end of the world. If the guy can't appreciate the things he has, then he's stupid and probably not even worth it. I'm sure there's someone here who'll be into you. If you want, I can help you out. Ah! Don't hug me, moron! Get off me and stop crying! I don't care if those are tears of happiness! Just stop it right now. Think, Yahiko, think.
Okay. I think I know a way to get your um, lover back. First off, no more crying. You’re a man. In a dress, sure, but still. A man. Now, to get him back, you have to do one simple thing and that is by changing your clothes. I don’t know much about fashion but even I know what you’re wearing is ugly. So change. Get to it!
Jeez, once I’m done with this guy, I’m finding a way back home. There is just no way that a dojo could be here.
Huh? That was fast. Your new dress ain't any better then the first but I guess it'll have to do. The hell are you acting so shy all of a sudden? Stop doing that and go find the idiot and win him back! -Why aren’t you leaving yet? Uh, what are you-Ah! Get off and stop trying to kiss me! I don’t like you that way!
What do you mean kiss the girl?! I am a guy! So stop your stupid singing and help out here, crab! Where did you come from anyways?
Poll Vote!
Character: Hellmaster Fibrizo
Series: Slayers
Age: (?) looks 10 or so
Canon: In the world of the Slayers there are five Mazoku (Demon, Monster, whatever else you wish to call them) Rulers who reigns over the others. They are Beast-master Zelas Metallium, Deep-Sea Dolphin, Chaos Dragon Gaav, Dynast Grausherra, and Hellmaster Phibrizo. Fibrizo has only one goal in life and that is to destroy the world and send all things back to nothingness.
When appearing not to be plotting the destruction of the world (you may perceive this to be so on several occasions, but I did say "appearing") he is a light hearted pick pocket. Fibrizo is often mistaken for an innocent non threatening little human child (boy in the anime/girl in the manga, just depends what you're media preference is). In truth he is a diabolical, cunning, and extremely powerful foe.
With no conscience to guide him Fibrizo sacrifices and uses a great many people to further his plans of world destruction. Many have attempted to end the existence of the great Mazoku but few can hurt him as much of his true self exists in the astral plane. His would-be killers also find themselves in trouble with his minions as he has the ability to control the dead, and create more followers with the snap of his fingers. He is to be feared, worshipped, and given candy for being a polite little boy. He is not to be underestimated by any adversary, he is not to be overlooked due to his height, because although he doesn't look it he stand above the other Mazoku Rulers as the most powerful.
Sample Post:
This world is not long from the chaos. I've been planning its destruction since mother spared my life and left me on this human-infested planet. I have come to understand her decision to mean this world is not worthy of existing and must return to her as soon as I can manage it. She did, however, leave me with a test. This "summer camp" as they call it, is just my first obstacle on the road to my destiny. When I find a way to get out of here, I will be ready to annihilate these insects!
First, I must assume control of this "summer camp", so in order to do so I have subjugated the zombie population. Ah! Here come some of my foot soldiers now, they've likely placed the magical items I gave them around the perimeter and are coming back for further instructions. I am only two steps away from completing my plan and when I do, this entire planet will return to chaos! You there, I want you to go and get……Don't interrupt me when I am in the middle of.... What?!
"Notice to the Employer, henceforth referred to as Fibrizo, of the formation of the Union of the Camp Fuck U Die Undead."
Union? What nonsense is this.... Now what?!
"This is grievance Z-010411 filed against Fibrizo by the U.C.F.U.D.U.
Violation: Article 5 Section 1b of the Zombie Labor Act of Louisiana. 'Evil subjugators are restricted from ranting about their plans to destroy the world and return it to chaos without an Undead Union Representative present.'
Remedy: Cease all illegal activity immediately."
Are you serious?! Do you think the rules of this world mean anything to me? Do you not realize that I control your every thought and movement? If I hear anymore of this from any of you I will...stop handing me papers dammit!
"Notice to Fibrizo of U.C.F.U.D.U. decision concerning grievance Z-010411. The zombies, are until further notice, ON STRIKE! Thank you."
What the hell...do you have any idea of what you are talking about?! I hold dominion over you all! I will not allow you...where the hell are you going?! Get back here! A strike now would set me back at least 9 months in my plans! Do you hear me talk--
Put your ears back on!
Poll Vote!
Character: Nagi Sanzenin
Series: Hayate the Combat Butler
Character Age: 13
Canon: On Christmas Eve, a sixteen year old boy named Hayate Ayasaki's deatbeat parents gave him the gift of a 156,804,000 yen debt, payable to the yakuza in his own organs. Desperate to survive, he attempted to kidnap and ransom a young girl he met in a park. However, he ended up saving her from a pair of other kidnappers and lending her his coat first, so the girl, Nagi Sanzenin, took his order to go with him as a confession of love and a request that she go out with him. When she found out about his debt, she hired him as her new butler.
As you may have gathered from the above paragraph, Nagi is not especially bright in terms of common sense. She is brash and stubborn, often throwing poor Hayate out for one imagined or overblown reason or another and taking forever to apologize. She also tends to speak very openly, insulting people who she doesn't like with a combination of deadpan delivery of phrases like "Please stop breathing, you're polluting the air," the classic "idiot" (usually heard shortly before Hayate is thrown out of the mansion again), and an overuse of the word "baldy," often aimed at people with a full head of hair.
Nagi has a tendency to skip school, due to the sheer number of times she has been kidnapped when she does go. On the rare occasions that she does attend classes, however, she is apparently very intelligent. Nagi is also a massive Otaku. Her mansion is filled with busts of various anime characters, and she has a separate room for every video-game system. She has a large bookshelf full of manga, and she has even tried to draw one of her own, an incomprehensible badly drawn magical girl series known as "End of the Century: Magical Destroy". Most of her dreams revolve around either becoming a famous mangaka and selling a billion copies or someday making Hayate her bride. Yes, you read that right.
Nagi stands to someday inherit the incredibly vast Sanzenin fortune from her grandfather Mikado. However, there is a condition under which anyone else with ties to the family can claim this inheritance for their own: by forcing Nagi to apologize in tears. She hates her grandfather for this condition. Hayate has taken it upon himself to defend her against anyone who attempts to do so. Nagi, of course, takes this as further proof of his love.
Sample Post:
Hey! Put me down, Baldy! Yeah, I’m talking to you! You’re so bald I can almost see your brain through your head! Look, I don’t know if this is a kidnapping or some stupid scheme to make me apologize in tears, or maybe a combination of the two, but either way it’s the stupidest one I’ve ever encountered. And I’ve dealt with Gilbert! Besides, I just need to say one word and my own personal Kira Yamato will come running to my rescue!
HAYATE!!!
You’re in trouble now! Nothing can stop my beloved Hayate when I call for him! He’ll be here and then you’ll be sorry!
Why are you giving me a letter, idiots? What, this is supposed to explain everything?
“Dear Miss Sanzenin: Thank you for coming to Camp Freedom From Undesirable Desire, the world's number one camp for the curing of hikikomori in rich high-schoolers. We have recieved your signed waiver as well as your five billion yen non-refundable fee. We now regret to inform you that the camp to which you have applied does not exist. Instead, welcome to Camp Fuck You Die, located in scenic East Bubbafuck, Louisiana. Rest assured, your money has gone towards improving our barrier to prevent further breakouts and breeding stronger and faster zombies.
Sincerely:
Elisabeth, CFUD Director”
...
I- I didn’t sign up for some stupid Anti-hikikomori camp! And there’s no way I’m really all the way in Louisiana! It didn’t take that long to get here! This is all part of the same stupid joke! This has to be the old man’s work. There’s no possible way anyone else could be stupid and sadistic enough to come up with a place like this and rich enough to put it into operation. And who the hell came up with the idea of taking “lucky” campers here by having them brought by a bunch of baldies in bad zombie make-up.
Yes I’m talking about you! You’ve stayed in character, I’ll give you that, but you can’t actually expect me to buy this dumb act.
Oh, a fake detachable arm. Really scary, morons. This is just too pathetic to even bother with.
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Closed~
Character: Marmon (Viper)
Series: Katekyo Hitman Reborn!
Age: ...infant. Just roll with it.
Canon: Every family's got its black sheep, and Sawada Tsunayoshi's little corner of the mafia is no exception to this rule. The Vongola famiglia's Varia, a group of elite assassins, is like the equivalent of the drunken, rowdy cousin that you avoid seeing on holidays, but they'll do worse to you than insult your Christmas ham. These nasty characters do take their names from the seven deadly sins, after all. Baaaaaaaby Varia assassin Marmon represents the sin of Greed, and his obsession in life is money: getting it, keeping it, getting more of it, and then keeping that too. He attempts to charge people for anything he can think of (e.g. looking at him), judges how much he likes things in monetary terms, and threatens to sell people to the circus if they look promising.
As retarded as he gets about money, Marmon is an extremely intelligent tactician, the type who prefers to sit in the shadows and assess the situation. He's snarky, irritatingly superior, and a bit sexist, but cool and laid-back--more likely to chatter on about your abilities and making a buck off of them than actually throw a punch. But when push comes to shove, Marmon is a whole lot of fuckown in a one-foot-tall package; he's an immensely powerful illusionist, capable of invading the mind of an opponent and subjecting them to an imaginary world of terror that feels very, very real.
And this pint-sized magician's favorite illusion? Tentacle bondage. Hey, whoever said babies had to be innocent and pure?
Sample Post:
Muuuu...so this isn't an illusion after all. I'm almost disappointed. I'd have had fun bringing such a powerful illusionist to his knees and selling him off to the highest bidder; the circus is easy to barter with, but the slavers pay twice as much if the merchandise is pretty. But no, instead of anyone with marketable talent, you have a shambling corpse with a top hat and cane who says abracadabrains and offered to pull a rabbit out of his pants for me. Are you really stupid enough to think anyone would pay for whatever's between your legs? If any other fool here thinks they'll show me something that disgusting again, please step forward now so I can put you out of your misery. I'll even give you a discount on your own casket.
No takers? I was looking forward to using that power, but it can wait. I have a business proposition for one Elizabeth Sayre, you see. A woman in charge? That explains it; I've never once met a woman with a lick of business sense. Madam Director, how much money would you say this farce of a camp brings in annually? Where's the profit? A few tacky stuffed gorillas sold to tourists? A dozen cases of cheap cigarettes for your prisoners? Why stop there? You may not have a single illusionist here who's worth a dime, but illusions aren't the only things that sell, and it's abundantly clear that your resources are being wasted on ineffective scare tactics. The wildlife alone could bring in millions; have you never heard of Sea World? Do you have any idea how much giggling teenage girls would pay to drag their hapless dates to the lake, throw "Marcy" a few pairs of frilly little panties, and watch her go wild? It's obscene what excites people, but it's even more obscene that you're not taking advantage of it.
If you and your staff are content to slum around in this pit until you rot, I'll show myself out after collecting my consultation fee. But if I have your attention, let me continue. I could capture your Marcy myself and sell her off to the circus for a hefty chunk of change, leaving you with nothing. But for the same price--up front, of course--I'll leave her in your custody and accept the temporary role of financial advisor. Let me see what she can do, and I'll show you how to market it to the entertainment-starved masses. Marcy? Let's start by making an example of Mr. Abracadabrains here. Show me on the zombie where we can touch our audience's wallets.
--What? That's all you've got? All this publicity, and that's the best you can do? You're a disgrace to tentacles. I'll have to show you that, and don't think I won't want extra for it. You call that power? Not even a Japanese filmmaker would pay you a red cent for that. Behold my power!
Muuu. Impressed, are you, Marcy? Now you see exactly what these tentacles can bring to the yard.
I suppose I could teach you--but I'd have to charge.
Poll Vote!
Character: Noda “Nodame” Megumi
Series: Nodame Cantabile (Jdrama)
Character Age: 20
Canon: “Nodame Cantabile” folllows musical prodigy Chiaki Shinichi and the human leech he acquired named Nodame. Chiaki is a bit of a haughty perfectionist who dreams of becoming a world-renowned conductor, but his fear of flying leaves him stranded in Japan where he sulks very prettily over less-talented students getting the recognition he deserves. Nodame, on the other hand, is a slob who wants nothing more than to teach children the joys of flatulence through song and dance, and pesters Chiaki at every opportunity. Throw in some other kooky and colourful characters with a dash of slapstick comedy, and you've got the story of how these two polar-opposites manage to help each other grow.
Which is a good thing, because Nodame isn't exactly the type of person you would want teaching your children. That is, unless you want them to grow up thinking that personal hygiene isn't all that important, that they should never have to clean their rooms, and that stealing lunchboxes from their friends is perfectly acceptable. It's not that Nodame is a bad person, she just doesn't appear to possess much common sense, and she would definitely be the first person lured into a pervert's van by the promise of food and toys. She gleans all of her life lessons from Puri Gorota, an anime/manga series for children that she obsesses and goes broke over, and often utters nonsense exclamations to emphasize extreme emotions. Much to the horror of Chiaki, she falls head-over-heels for him and constantly refers to herself as his wife. Luckily, she is redeemed in the eyes of society by her undeniable talent at the piano; even if her playing style is as lively and idiosyncratic as she is!
(Nodame is being apped from the end of the Japanese Drama.)
Sample Post:
People of New France, Please donate to the “Nodame-Needs-To-Get-To-Paris” fund! It’s true that Nodame has never done busking before, but this is an act of desperation! The scholarship money from the Paris Music Conservatory was spent on Puri Gorota merchandise because they don't sell any Puri Gorota in France and Nodame will be lost without her treasures, but Nodame found a cheap flight to Louisiana in New France and will pay for passage to Paris from here! That's where Chiaki-sempai is waiting for Nodame, and sempai will start to feel lonely if Nodame doesn't get there soon. Nodame can already feel our love growing stronger from here, hauu~
New France isn't how Nodame imagined it at all though! When Gorota went to France, the girls were all wore poofy dresses, and the boys had big, curly moustaches. But Nodame can't even tell the difference between some of the boys and girls here. Everyone in the audience looks exactly the same! No, no, don't take off your clothes! Nodame will believe in whatever you say! Maybe you should all go to the hospital after the performance though. Everyone looks ready to fall apart, and that shade of gray isn't anything Nodame has ever seen on a person before!
You're not the only ones that Nodame can't tell apart though, so don't be embarrassed! Nodame came across a really pretty lady while looking for a good busking spot, only it wasn't a lady at all... Kyaah, don't look at Nodame like that, it was an accident! Nodame isn't really a peeping-pervert! Ah... but what if Nodame gets drunk one night and is tricked into relations with someone who turns out to be a trap?! And then they'll blackmail Nodame by threatening to smear her name in the tabloids as "the-beautiful-and-talented-young-pianist-who-engages-in-illicit-love-affairs"! BUT NODAME WILL BE CAREFUL TO STAY TRUE TO CHIAKI-SEMPAI AND--
GYABOU! N-Nodame will play now, so please don't throw tomatoes anymore! Or at least throw them in the pianika box so Nodame can eat them later. This feeling of hunger... it's unbearable! Anyway, Nodame learned this song from Graarrrh-san in the audience while walking around New France, so please listen carefully!
Zip a dee doo dah, Zip a dee day
My oh my what a wonderful day!
A whole pack of zombies headin’ my way,
Zip a dee doo dah, Zip a dee day!
Mister toucan on my shoulder,
Oh no! If you probe my mind
Incriminating thoughts for you to find
Zip a dee doo dah, Zip a dee day
Better go find a moogle
Umm... La-la-la-la-hey!
Thank you, thank you! Please don’t be shy! Contribute some donations to Nodame’s worthy cause!
Muykaa, that’s a rock you threw in there! Nodame can’t get to Paris using rocks! But Nodame understands what it's like to be poor, so if you don’t have money, food as alms is okay too.
G-Gyabou! Nodame said "alms", not "arms"!
Poll Vote!
Character: Yahiko Myojin
Series: Rurouni Kenshin
Age: 10
Canon: Set during the Meiji Era, Rurouni Kenshin revolves around Kenshin Himura, a manslayer turned wanderer. His travels lead him to Tokyo where he meets a dojo instructor, an ex-fighter for hire, an ex-thief, and a fox doctor. With his new companions, he fights against those who wish to destroy the peaceful era and try break his no-killing vow.
Yahiko, the descendant of a samurai family, is prideful and wishes to be viewed as an adult despite his age. He's also rude, arrogant, and cheeky. Once you get pass that though, you'll see that the kid has a strong heart and plenty of courage who fights enemies twice his size in order to protect his friends and sometimes complete strangers. In other words, he’s a short kid with a big stick and knows how to use it.
Sample Post:
So basically you're saying he dumped you? I'm not surprised. Have you looked in a mirror lately? I would reject you too if I were him. Anyways, I listened to your relationship problems, like I promised so keep your of the deal and tell me where the dojo is. When I come back home, I’m going to kill that old hag for sending me to this dump for training. And what kind of a dojo would be called Hit-Mi-Right-Thar anyway?
…Are you crying? Don’t say you aren’t because you’re not fooling anyone. Look, just because one person dumped you doesn't mean it's the end of the world. If the guy can't appreciate the things he has, then he's stupid and probably not even worth it. I'm sure there's someone here who'll be into you. If you want, I can help you out. Ah! Don't hug me, moron! Get off me and stop crying! I don't care if those are tears of happiness! Just stop it right now. Think, Yahiko, think.
Okay. I think I know a way to get your um, lover back. First off, no more crying. You’re a man. In a dress, sure, but still. A man. Now, to get him back, you have to do one simple thing and that is by changing your clothes. I don’t know much about fashion but even I know what you’re wearing is ugly. So change. Get to it!
Jeez, once I’m done with this guy, I’m finding a way back home. There is just no way that a dojo could be here.
Huh? That was fast. Your new dress ain't any better then the first but I guess it'll have to do. The hell are you acting so shy all of a sudden? Stop doing that and go find the idiot and win him back! -Why aren’t you leaving yet? Uh, what are you-Ah! Get off and stop trying to kiss me! I don’t like you that way!
What do you mean kiss the girl?! I am a guy! So stop your stupid singing and help out here, crab! Where did you come from anyways?
Poll Vote!
Character: Hellmaster Fibrizo
Series: Slayers
Age: (?) looks 10 or so
Canon: In the world of the Slayers there are five Mazoku (Demon, Monster, whatever else you wish to call them) Rulers who reigns over the others. They are Beast-master Zelas Metallium, Deep-Sea Dolphin, Chaos Dragon Gaav, Dynast Grausherra, and Hellmaster Phibrizo. Fibrizo has only one goal in life and that is to destroy the world and send all things back to nothingness.
When appearing not to be plotting the destruction of the world (you may perceive this to be so on several occasions, but I did say "appearing") he is a light hearted pick pocket. Fibrizo is often mistaken for an innocent non threatening little human child (boy in the anime/girl in the manga, just depends what you're media preference is). In truth he is a diabolical, cunning, and extremely powerful foe.
With no conscience to guide him Fibrizo sacrifices and uses a great many people to further his plans of world destruction. Many have attempted to end the existence of the great Mazoku but few can hurt him as much of his true self exists in the astral plane. His would-be killers also find themselves in trouble with his minions as he has the ability to control the dead, and create more followers with the snap of his fingers. He is to be feared, worshipped, and given candy for being a polite little boy. He is not to be underestimated by any adversary, he is not to be overlooked due to his height, because although he doesn't look it he stand above the other Mazoku Rulers as the most powerful.
Sample Post:
This world is not long from the chaos. I've been planning its destruction since mother spared my life and left me on this human-infested planet. I have come to understand her decision to mean this world is not worthy of existing and must return to her as soon as I can manage it. She did, however, leave me with a test. This "summer camp" as they call it, is just my first obstacle on the road to my destiny. When I find a way to get out of here, I will be ready to annihilate these insects!
First, I must assume control of this "summer camp", so in order to do so I have subjugated the zombie population. Ah! Here come some of my foot soldiers now, they've likely placed the magical items I gave them around the perimeter and are coming back for further instructions. I am only two steps away from completing my plan and when I do, this entire planet will return to chaos! You there, I want you to go and get……Don't interrupt me when I am in the middle of.... What?!
"Notice to the Employer, henceforth referred to as Fibrizo, of the formation of the Union of the Camp Fuck U Die Undead."
Union? What nonsense is this.... Now what?!
"This is grievance Z-010411 filed against Fibrizo by the U.C.F.U.D.U.
Violation: Article 5 Section 1b of the Zombie Labor Act of Louisiana. 'Evil subjugators are restricted from ranting about their plans to destroy the world and return it to chaos without an Undead Union Representative present.'
Remedy: Cease all illegal activity immediately."
Are you serious?! Do you think the rules of this world mean anything to me? Do you not realize that I control your every thought and movement? If I hear anymore of this from any of you I will...stop handing me papers dammit!
"Notice to Fibrizo of U.C.F.U.D.U. decision concerning grievance Z-010411. The zombies, are until further notice, ON STRIKE! Thank you."
What the hell...do you have any idea of what you are talking about?! I hold dominion over you all! I will not allow you...where the hell are you going?! Get back here! A strike now would set me back at least 9 months in my plans! Do you hear me talk--
Put your ears back on!
Poll Vote!
Character: Nagi Sanzenin
Series: Hayate the Combat Butler
Character Age: 13
Canon: On Christmas Eve, a sixteen year old boy named Hayate Ayasaki's deatbeat parents gave him the gift of a 156,804,000 yen debt, payable to the yakuza in his own organs. Desperate to survive, he attempted to kidnap and ransom a young girl he met in a park. However, he ended up saving her from a pair of other kidnappers and lending her his coat first, so the girl, Nagi Sanzenin, took his order to go with him as a confession of love and a request that she go out with him. When she found out about his debt, she hired him as her new butler.
As you may have gathered from the above paragraph, Nagi is not especially bright in terms of common sense. She is brash and stubborn, often throwing poor Hayate out for one imagined or overblown reason or another and taking forever to apologize. She also tends to speak very openly, insulting people who she doesn't like with a combination of deadpan delivery of phrases like "Please stop breathing, you're polluting the air," the classic "idiot" (usually heard shortly before Hayate is thrown out of the mansion again), and an overuse of the word "baldy," often aimed at people with a full head of hair.
Nagi has a tendency to skip school, due to the sheer number of times she has been kidnapped when she does go. On the rare occasions that she does attend classes, however, she is apparently very intelligent. Nagi is also a massive Otaku. Her mansion is filled with busts of various anime characters, and she has a separate room for every video-game system. She has a large bookshelf full of manga, and she has even tried to draw one of her own, an incomprehensible badly drawn magical girl series known as "End of the Century: Magical Destroy". Most of her dreams revolve around either becoming a famous mangaka and selling a billion copies or someday making Hayate her bride. Yes, you read that right.
Nagi stands to someday inherit the incredibly vast Sanzenin fortune from her grandfather Mikado. However, there is a condition under which anyone else with ties to the family can claim this inheritance for their own: by forcing Nagi to apologize in tears. She hates her grandfather for this condition. Hayate has taken it upon himself to defend her against anyone who attempts to do so. Nagi, of course, takes this as further proof of his love.
Sample Post:
Hey! Put me down, Baldy! Yeah, I’m talking to you! You’re so bald I can almost see your brain through your head! Look, I don’t know if this is a kidnapping or some stupid scheme to make me apologize in tears, or maybe a combination of the two, but either way it’s the stupidest one I’ve ever encountered. And I’ve dealt with Gilbert! Besides, I just need to say one word and my own personal Kira Yamato will come running to my rescue!
HAYATE!!!
You’re in trouble now! Nothing can stop my beloved Hayate when I call for him! He’ll be here and then you’ll be sorry!
Why are you giving me a letter, idiots? What, this is supposed to explain everything?
“Dear Miss Sanzenin: Thank you for coming to Camp Freedom From Undesirable Desire, the world's number one camp for the curing of hikikomori in rich high-schoolers. We have recieved your signed waiver as well as your five billion yen non-refundable fee. We now regret to inform you that the camp to which you have applied does not exist. Instead, welcome to Camp Fuck You Die, located in scenic East Bubbafuck, Louisiana. Rest assured, your money has gone towards improving our barrier to prevent further breakouts and breeding stronger and faster zombies.
Sincerely:
Elisabeth, CFUD Director”
...
I- I didn’t sign up for some stupid Anti-hikikomori camp! And there’s no way I’m really all the way in Louisiana! It didn’t take that long to get here! This is all part of the same stupid joke! This has to be the old man’s work. There’s no possible way anyone else could be stupid and sadistic enough to come up with a place like this and rich enough to put it into operation. And who the hell came up with the idea of taking “lucky” campers here by having them brought by a bunch of baldies in bad zombie make-up.
Yes I’m talking about you! You’ve stayed in character, I’ll give you that, but you can’t actually expect me to buy this dumb act.
Oh, a fake detachable arm. Really scary, morons. This is just too pathetic to even bother with.
Poll Vote!