South Park Ships: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly
First and foremost, I’d like to state that I’m not a psychology professional, just a student. Everything I talk about is information I have gathered throughout my college schooling. I have yet to take Personality, so it's possible that some of my thoughts would be different for some pairings. Also, the human mind is an extremely complex thing, shaped by a seemingly infinite number of factors. I’m going to focus a very specific psychological factor of how people learn to handle relationships: attachment style. While this is probably the biggest influence on how adult relationship behavior is formed, it isn't the only one. Do not take my words as gospel and please, do not take this to heart as some sort of ship bashing/praising. I wrote this as unbiased as possible, going based off of what I know.
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Alright, so, which South Park ships would most likely be successful, long lasting relationships, and which ones would be more likely to fail? Before we get to that, it’s important to know about one of the big factors that determine how people deal with romantic relationships as adults: attachment styles. As infants/young children, the kind of relationship we have with our parents, specifically our primary caregiver (usually a mom), heavily influence us later on in life. In fact, it is so important that if the bond is a bad one, it can prevent a person from ever having a normal, healthy love life. I can not stress how significant attachment style is.
Anyways, there are four kinds of styles: secure, anxious-ambivalent, anxious-avoidant, and disorganized-disordered. With secure attachments, the mother is very responsive to the child’s needs, caring, affectionate, playful, etc, and the child has a very positive relationship with them (cry when mom leaves but is able to deal with separation, happy when she returns, has a strong preference for her over strangers, etc). As adults, people with secure attachments are high in self-esteem and very good with relationships (trusting, well at communicating, not jealous, not worried about partner leaving them, love comes before work, etc).
With anxious-ambivalent, mothers are ‘hot and cold’ (sometimes loving, other times… not so much), while the child is wary of strangers and very distressed when their parent leaves, but not very comforted by the return of said parent. As adults, people with anxious-ambivalent attachments are clingy, need constant assurance that their partner loves them, need to hear praise, always wants to know what their partner is up to, etc.
With anxious-avoidant, mothers constantly neglect their children’s needs, especially in terms of contact, while the child is sometimes avoidant of the parent, doesn't really seek comfort from their parents, has no preference between strangers and parents. As adults, these people tend to be skittish, have a fear of commitment, jealous, have problems with intimacy, have a hard time sharing thoughts/feelings, and don’t really invest too much in social/romantic relationships.
And finally, disorganized-disordered attachment. For this, the primary caregiver is an inefficient parent (drug abuse, psychological issues such as major depression, domestic violence, abusive towards child, etc), and is often times a rather terrifying figure for the child. The child is scared by the parent, may show avoidant/resistant behaviors, and seem dazed/confused/apprehensive. As adults, they tend to be fickle/never happy, always feel suffocated in relationships, and tend to break up/get together/ break up/get together many times. As I said, there are other factors that can impact how people deal with relationships as adults such as personality, mental health, important non-parental figures, communication skills, etc.
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Alright, now that out of the way, let’s talk ships! I’m gonna only elaborate o some f the more 'popular' pairings that deal with the main four and Butters, mainly because these characters have more information I can work with as opposed to characters like Kevin Stoley and Lola who I don’t have much to work with.
Style- Congratulations Style fans, you picked a decent ship! Both of the boys come from relatively good families (mishaps and shenanigans aside), and have mothers that love/support/treat them well. I can say that both most likely have secure attachments with their primary caregivers, meaning that as adults they would be well adjusted and able to have a strong romantic relationship. As seen in the show, Stan and Kyle tend to work well at solving problems together, during fights they often work out their differences and can communicate their feelings, and are comfortable being apart from each other and hanging out with others. All of this indicates that they’d have a good romantic relationship. If a couple can't work together without fighting, their relationship won't make it. The biggest bumps in their relationship would be Kyle’s tendency towards quick anger and Stan’s tendency toward ‘depression’. Also, since divorce can affect children, that might lead to some relationship issue for Stan. However, since it was his dad that left both times, and in the end his parents got back together, I don’t believe it would be enough to ruin his ability to have good relationships. Besides, with how they tend to stick together and work things out, I feel that they’d be able to deal with all their issues. As far as I can tell, Style would be a stable, long lasting relationship.
Kyman- As I said, Kyle is a person with very secure attachment. Cartman…is ugh. Although Liane undoubtedly loves and dotes on her son, as the show mentions, there is drug use and prostitution/sex with random men that Cartman probably knows about. Not to mention, Cartman does not have much respect for her (manipulating her, defying her rules, yelling at her, etc) and is over all rather… unbalanced? So although I’m leaning towards potentially disorganized-disordered, it’s hard to say. But it’s definitely not secure. Now, in terms of Kyman, there is good and bad news. Most likely they would not be a long lasting relationship. Both have very conflicting personalities and aren't that great at communication. They figh a lot. And this would transfer over into an adult romantic relationship. If two people can’t work out their problems without yelling/insulting each other, they won’t be able to form a long-term relationship. Good news is that anger/fighting puts the body in a heightened state of physical arousal. This arousal from fighting often gets confused as attraction and leads to intense sexual arousal. However, overtime, passion is statistically shown to die down. This meaning they would eventually get to the point where they’re just fighting. So…. while they probably wouldn't form a stable, long-term relationship, they would undoubtedly hav really hot ex.
Bunny- Yeah. I’m sure if you read my rant about attachment styles you know I don’t have great news. Butters parents, although they are shown to love him, are overly strict, demanding, not too affectionate, seemingly unbalanced (at least on his mother’s part- remember her mental breakdown when she found out about her husband cheating and tried to, you know, kill him?), and abusive (ie that time they beat him up in ‘Jared has Aids and that time his mother tried to kill him). Not to mention Butters is simply terrified of them. I’d say he’s most likely disorganized-disordered. Kenny comes from a home filled with drugs/alcohol abuse, domestic violence, and as a result of those things, probably neglect. I’d put Kenny along the lines of either disorganized-disordered or anxious-avoidant. So, in terms of Bunny, those boys would have a lot of problems. Depending which way Kenny would go in terms of attachment, there might be plenty of commitment problems, jealousy, problems with intimacy, and a hard time sharing thoughts and feelings. The couple would probably go through the get together/break up/get back together cycle many times. Not to mention, Kenny tends to have a bit of a ‘Savior Complex’ so to speak, so it could be likely that Kenny might see that Butters would be ‘better off’ without him and would thus break things off with him (only to later get back together again). So although Kenny would be fine with sex and being a ‘player’, he wouldn't be too hot at relationships or commitment. Although, as bleak as all this sounds (I’m truly sorry Bunny fans!), there is a silver lining to this cloud. Personality-wise, both boys are pretty up-beat, positive, and caring, which is definitely an advantage for them. Granted I have not taken personality, I imagine that this would increase their chances at being successful. Also, it should be mentioned that if a person has a positive/supportive outside figure (grandparent, neighbor, friend’s parent, …elementary school cafeteria cook), the negative effects of insecure attachment can be drastically reduced. Not to mention that there is also therapy/counselling. So there is hope! It would take them both a lot of work but I suppose it could be possible. However, if they do not make an effort to correct their attachment style, or if something attachment-altering doesn't happen, they won't make it as a couple in a healthy relationship
K2- I already talked about Kyle and Kenny, so let’s just get to what everyone wants to know. K2 would be a rather turbulent relationship. Kyle would be very much the good partner: supportive, communicative, trusting, etc. Kenny, however, would have a much harder time being in the relationship. He’d potentially have problems with jealousy, most likely in regards to Kyle and Stan’s friendship. There would also be many times where Kenny would feel the need to break things off with Kyle when things get serious, be it for fear of commitment or fear that he’s only bring Kyle down and that Kyle could do better. Kyle would try to be reassuring and help Kenny, as is his nature. However, Kyle’s helpfulness might become too much, making Kenny feel suffocated, which only further complicates things. And with Kyle’s temper there is sure to be many fights, and consequently break ups. It might even get to the point where Kyle just has enough and breaks things off permanently. If Kenny can manage to get over his relationship problems (which is kind of hard to do since this stuff becomes pretty ingrained in childhood), or has some experience that alters his attachment style (Chef’s good influence and support? Parents clean up their acts?), then Kenny could end up with a mostly secure attachment and thus K2 would be a pretty normal, healthy relationship. However, without this change in attachment, K2 is sure to have many problems.
Cutters/Buttman- As I already talked about Cartman and Butters, I don't think I need to elaborate on the potential wreck this could end up. It would be filled with break-up, Cartman manipulating/taking advantage of/insulting Butters, Butters feeling suffocated and unhappy, etc. It would not be a healthy relationship. I can't even sugar coat it like I did with Bunny.
Well there are all of my long explanations. How about some quick insight into some of the other characters/pairings?
Secure attachments that would do good in relationships: Token, Wendy, Clyde (although the death of his mothe might ome into play), probably Bebe, Gary, Jimmy, Nichole, and Ike. Combine any them (along with Stan and Kyle) together and it will be a good relationship (this is of course going just on attachments. Obviously personality and common interests would change compatibility).
Craig and Tweek are iffy. Based on what brief interactions we see, Craig’s parents seem both caring about their son, yet standoffish. His family flipped each other off at dinner. However, this doesn't mean that they aren't good parents. Overall, I don't see evindents that hints at them being bad parents. I’d say Craig, all though more reserved, would have a secure attachment (maaaaybe anxious-ambivalent). Tweek’s in a similar ambiguous situation. Although his parents do seem caring and decent, they seem a little...not necessarily neglectful, but hands off-ish? Not very in tune with their child’s needs? They practically feed their kid coffee? But yet at the same time they seem like good parents? Anyways, I could very well see Tweek as one of the anxious attachments based on his personality alone (I could see him as skittish or in need of constant assurance that their partner loves them and that they aren't with him out of pity or something). Then again, perhaps his nervous-Tweekness will calm down and, assuming he does have a good bond with his parents, he might have a very secure-attachment. Like I said, I'm not yet fully versed in personality, so Tweek is a bit tough for me to read. So Creek could go different ways. We don’t see enough of their families to really say for sure.
As for the other kids, as far as I can think of, we don’t see enough of their parents to really get a glimpse at how they would be
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So….to summarize, most of the kids we know enough about appear to be great romantic partners as adults. Cartman, Kenny, and Butters, when paired with the others, tend to result in rather rocky relationships. And when the three are combined together in different combinations, they result in potential messes. As I said, I focused on attachment styles, which while a bug factor, is not the only determinant in how people handle relationships as adults. There are many factors, this is only one. So relationships might end up different than how I predict.
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In conclusion, based on attachment:
The (potential) Good: Style, Stendy, TokenxWendy, Kybe, Toyle, Stary, TokenxNichole, KylexNichole, Bendy, Clybe, Tyde, KylexWendy, etc
The (potentially) Bad: K2, Kyman, Kendy, Candy, Stenny, Stanman, KennyxBebe, Creek?, etc
The (potential) Ugly: Buttman, Kenric, and Bunny
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Alright, there you have it. My evaluation of pairings via psychological attachment style. Any input? Thoughts? Opinions? Maybe you view things a different way? Like I said, I'm still learning. Feel free to discuss anything!