yeeeah i hate me. the one major thing i totally dislike about myself right now is how i am so totally scarred from being with robbie. i dont trust anyone anymore and its starting to bother people. its hard to change they way you are and have been for a long time in an instant and i know its not fair to treat anyone this way unless they have totally ( Read more... )

so i was supposed to go to my grandmas today but i got all sick in the night and i didnt sleep very well so that was super sucky. so i had like the weirdest dream and it was just so strange... haha i love those. anyway i had a weird night last and i hope to never have one like that again and just yeah i cant really talk about why... its all so ( Read more... )

i still dont know about this weekend... i think im sleeping over with jenny and even though she hasnt asked im still going to... haha so yeah baby im having an interesting time trying to watch tv and listen to cds and talk on the computer... its just so super awesome. i had a really long talk with jimmy today... i love that boy... not in that way ( Read more... )

i really thought that i had fixed things for myself and i had made it so i dont have to feel bad about any crap anymore but i was totally wrong. im so tired of being hurt and even if its not intentional it sure seems that way and maybe thats just me thinking "oh god i cant ever get a break" but i just dont know. i really am trying to get out more ( Read more... )

hi children... today sucked... a lot. like holy crap i have a stomach virus PLUS robbie was totally trying to make me feel like crap. i wonder how you can call yourself somebodys friend and just make them feel so totally like crap they dont know if they're going to feel happy ever again. i mean i love all my friends and i would never do anything to ( Read more... )

okay well i just got back from west side story and it was soooooo goooood i was like yeahhh bc i know like everybody in it except for a few people... for example the guy who plays bernardo... so hott but ive never seen him before so it was weird. matt and emily were really great as the leads even though hes a bass and cant sing that high but it ( Read more... )

yeah my last entry was just so depressing and i was just in a bad mood when i was typing that. so yeah but the weekend totally got better after that. saturday i went to danielles house with jenny, ali, lauren, alec and shahad and we had fun doing what girls do best which is being stupid. but what semi made that good is i had been talking to someone ( Read more... )

every day gets better yet harder at the same time i miss always having someone to talk to so badly. i miss robbie. i know that we wont work out as a couple but i know that i loved him and i truly did. i miss his companionship bc he was really great and when we were together it was like always having someone who cared about you and worried about you ( Read more... )

Well as the whole world seems to know... Robbie finally got so sick of me that he ended things. 2 years and it seems like it doesnt mean anything to him. I just love how it doesnt and then I have to hear about how he likes another girl who is like way better than me and i just dont know how to handle any of these things bc im just so consumed with ( Read more... )

yeah i pretty much hate everything... thank you everybody i want to cry