so many emotions
ok so this is kind of a letter that i wish i had the guts to send to the boy that ive been totally in love with the past 6 months and i guess it self explains itself .. sorry if its not good but i had so many emotions i just needed to write something .. i guess if that doesnt count as a quote ...
o01.sometimes you think that someone is there for you .. and cares
when truly there just lying to make themselves feel so much damn better
o02.boy,
im so mad at you right now .. not only have you totally ripped my heart from my chest but youve also thrown it into a blender .. ground it up and then threw it on the ground and stomped on it until you were weak .. i put all of my trust in you .. i finally thought that you were being totally honest and that you were truly starting to love me like i loved you .. you lead me on to believe that .. you told me you loved me and you tried to get me to do things i would have never done with you .. and i did because i thought we would be together .. little did i know in your crazy mind .. you played me so bad .. you twisted my heart so that i would have to give into your smile, your charm, your lines .. and stupid me .. i bought every single one of them .. I bought every line .. me, the girl that always said i would never ever love you .. but i did .. and now you not only destroyed me .. but now your with the person i thought would never decieve me .. my sister .. how could you ? .. i feel like just crying my eyes out .. i want to beat you so hard right now .. but i cant.. i cant get over you and your stupid stupid ways... i cant .. im not even mad at you .. im mad at myself.. im disgusted that i would ever believe anything you would say .. i hate you .. but as much as i hate you .. i dont want you to know .. i want you to think that i dont care .. because i dont care .. i no longer feel .. but you will never know that .. you will never know because i will hide behind my fake smile and my fake laughs .. just so you hurt like i do .. thinking that im not hurt .. when really i jsut want to break down and cry .. but im not going to im going to be strong .. not for you .. but for me .. but i will secretly tell myself what a lying .. coniving person you .. so that i will never ever have to hurt like this again .. i hope that you never hurt anyone like youve hurt me because for these past 6 months i loved you with ALL of my heart .. while you .. you played me and didnt even care of the hurt i would feel because youve done this before and your a pro in this kind of game .. and now you can have what you want .. a medal .. the medal is my blended mashed heart .. bleeding all of the love i had for you out .. because no longer will i EVER want to love you again .. i just want you out of my life and now thats what you are to me a no one .. a has been .. a regret .. my biggest mistake of 2005 .. so now im done and this year wont be as bad because i wont deal with you ..
yours truly,
the girl with a healing heart
o01.sometimes you think that someone is there for you .. and cares
when truly there just lying to make themselves feel so much damn better
o02.boy,
im so mad at you right now .. not only have you totally ripped my heart from my chest but youve also thrown it into a blender .. ground it up and then threw it on the ground and stomped on it until you were weak .. i put all of my trust in you .. i finally thought that you were being totally honest and that you were truly starting to love me like i loved you .. you lead me on to believe that .. you told me you loved me and you tried to get me to do things i would have never done with you .. and i did because i thought we would be together .. little did i know in your crazy mind .. you played me so bad .. you twisted my heart so that i would have to give into your smile, your charm, your lines .. and stupid me .. i bought every single one of them .. I bought every line .. me, the girl that always said i would never ever love you .. but i did .. and now you not only destroyed me .. but now your with the person i thought would never decieve me .. my sister .. how could you ? .. i feel like just crying my eyes out .. i want to beat you so hard right now .. but i cant.. i cant get over you and your stupid stupid ways... i cant .. im not even mad at you .. im mad at myself.. im disgusted that i would ever believe anything you would say .. i hate you .. but as much as i hate you .. i dont want you to know .. i want you to think that i dont care .. because i dont care .. i no longer feel .. but you will never know that .. you will never know because i will hide behind my fake smile and my fake laughs .. just so you hurt like i do .. thinking that im not hurt .. when really i jsut want to break down and cry .. but im not going to im going to be strong .. not for you .. but for me .. but i will secretly tell myself what a lying .. coniving person you .. so that i will never ever have to hurt like this again .. i hope that you never hurt anyone like youve hurt me because for these past 6 months i loved you with ALL of my heart .. while you .. you played me and didnt even care of the hurt i would feel because youve done this before and your a pro in this kind of game .. and now you can have what you want .. a medal .. the medal is my blended mashed heart .. bleeding all of the love i had for you out .. because no longer will i EVER want to love you again .. i just want you out of my life and now thats what you are to me a no one .. a has been .. a regret .. my biggest mistake of 2005 .. so now im done and this year wont be as bad because i wont deal with you ..
yours truly,
the girl with a healing heart