That's exactly what I have to do - spend some time with these children and find out what these children enjoy. My only fear is that I won't find anything. I mean, in my heart I know I will, but in my brain, I'm not so sure.
I must admit that your friend is right - I have done similar. Have you asked what sort of tv/computer programmes they like; favourite places in the world they'd like to visit; or I've even asked the layout of bedrooms [it's amazing what you can ask with my subject]. I'm sure you ask where or who is the best person to listen to music with. It's possible to see through a chink to the person within.
At least this'll give us something to discuss when we meet, huh?
This is hard, but I know you can do it. Sometimes it's just something as simple as the way the child smiles. When I was a camp counselor and having issues with one girl's behavior, I told her she had a beautiful smile. She smiled more the rest of the week and made an effort to be happier in general - at least when I was around. Of course, that can cause problems with the other children because then they wonder why you're not telling them they have a great smile too. And I think I got lucky with her, because obviously not all children will respond to the first thing that comes to mind immediately. Another way I've tried to cope with misbehavior, especially in my group voice class, is to assign solos within songs. Usually it makes the kids feel special and want to work harder, and then it's easier for me to find something to like or love about them because I'm getting a little individual attention there. Again, though, I've gotten lucky because it's a smaller group and not all the kids want solos, so there's not a whole lot of
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You're right, this child probably is screaming deep down inside to be loved. She's also probably used to being ignored or brushed off, so she feels negative attention is better than none at all. Is she causing trouble for other teachers too, or just in your class? That might help provide a solution in reaching out to her.
What is she interested in? She may not tell you anything at all, so you may have to observe her outside of class, or find out from other teachers. What does she like to wear, does she wear jewelry, are there cartoon characters on her lunch bag or backpack, what kind of doodles decorate her binder or notebooks. Maybe her other teachers have noted things she likes? I think you will find something she's passionate about, and that will give you an in.
Good luck!
(Completely off topic, but I keep meaning to ask--do you teach recorder in your music class?)
Well, class iszes aren't too outrageous yet - less than 25 children per class. We'll see what happens next year when they ratched it up to 30 kids/class.
For one thing - count yourself lucky if you've only got ONE of those per class. I usually have a minimum of about six and they're eleven and upward, so an awkward age.
It takes time to build a relationship, and sadly, there are some kids who are NEVER going to respond, regardless of what you do. That PD day I had at the end of the last time (I posted about it somewhere) was about our relationships with the kids and one of the things that the speaker said was SO very true - The kids who most need our love are usually those that seem to deserve it the least.Reading the rest of the comments here, I know I'm coming off as sounding very negative, but as you well know, it's very much easier said than done, especially given everything else we have to do during the course of a normal day/week. It's a good idea in principle, but it will be a long haul
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Oh, no, I definitely have more than one per class. My 5th graders are no picnic - 10 and 11 year olds going on 21 they are. How can an 11 year old be so deadened to the world?
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At least this'll give us something to discuss when we meet, huh?
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What is she interested in? She may not tell you anything at all, so you may have to observe her outside of class, or find out from other teachers. What does she like to wear, does she wear jewelry, are there cartoon characters on her lunch bag or backpack, what kind of doodles decorate her binder or notebooks. Maybe her other teachers have noted things she likes? I think you will find something she's passionate about, and that will give you an in.
Good luck!
(Completely off topic, but I keep meaning to ask--do you teach recorder in your music class?)
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It takes time to build a relationship, and sadly, there are some kids who are NEVER going to respond, regardless of what you do. That PD day I had at the end of the last time (I posted about it somewhere) was about our relationships with the kids and one of the things that the speaker said was SO very true - The kids who most need our love are usually those that seem to deserve it the least.Reading the rest of the comments here, I know I'm coming off as sounding very negative, but as you well know, it's very much easier said than done, especially given everything else we have to do during the course of a normal day/week. It's a good idea in principle, but it will be a long haul ( ... )
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