THE RITUAL HAS BEGUN

[more_surreal]

WHO: Calvin, OPEN
WHERE: Battery Park
WHEN: Sunday afternoon
WARNINGS: Irresponsible use of flammable materials
SUMMARY: It is Fall, which means it is time for Calvin's unique take on theology
FORMAT: Prose

Comments

[gatewhatgate]

The Monster was getting lost.

In one hand, he carried his homework that had hastily scribbled directions to a certain Pie Hole. The Monster had been trying to figure out how street signs worked before he ended up just wandering the city. In the other hand, he carried his bright pink umbrella.

He had been walking for a while before he decided to take a break at a nice little park. He was hungry and tired and more than a little bit lonely, but he wasn't terribly upset, so while the shade cast by the umbrella was darker than normal shadows, the Monster's new kid form was perfectly visible.

He spotted Calvin among a pile of leaves, shouting some sort of spell. He knew that kid! That kid was on the Network thingy.

He approached cheerfully.

[more_surreal]

"BLIZZARDS! WINDSTORMS! WHITEOUTS! SLEEEEEEEEET!" Calvin broke off mid-chant as he spotted the weird-looking kid with the pink umbrella who most definitely was not the monster he'd been talking to on the Network.

"Hey, kid!" He said. "What are you doing here? I'm in the middle of something important!"

[gatewhatgate]

"Oh, sorry!"

The Monster backed up a little. The last thing he wanted to do was interrupt some sort of important spell. People had yelled at him more than once for that and one time - well, the important thing was not accidentally exploding something.

"It's Calvin, right? You can do magic?"

[more_surreal]

Wait now he recognizes the voice! Calvin peers at him, confused. "Monster? That's you? Wow, I didn't know the Porter gave you a human form too!"

He looks at his glorious leaf pile. "I don't have magic powers or anything, but there are higher powers out there that I can appeal to. At least, with the correct sacrifice." He makes this part sound sinister for dramatic effect.

[gatewhatgate]

The Monster grins and looks down at himself. The whole human thing was still pretty weird. He shakes a leg experimentally.

"Yeah, I guess it's neat, but I kinda wish I knew what sort of monster I was before."

He looks up again, at all the leaves. "Isn't that just clerical magic though?"

[more_surreal]

"Nah, I'm no priest," Calvin says. "Just a humble worshipper trying to gain a favour or two for the winter."

He raises his arms again and shouts theatrically. "The Snow Demons look down upon all of us from their frosty heights! In their terrible talons lies the power over snow and ice! We must appease them and beg their mercy, or be condemned to the eternal horrors of warm and snowless winter!"

[gatewhatgate]

The Monster stays silent for a bit, not really wanting to interrupt the ritual. His curiosity gets the better of him, though.

"Um, so what're you praying for?"

[more_surreal]

"Oh, lots of stuff," Calvin said. "A white Christmas, closed schools. But mainly snow! Snow's the most important thing to having a good winter! Here, listen while I recite the sacred hymn. It'll explain more."

He started to kind of sing, which in this case meant yelling tunelessly. "Hie-Thee-Ho! Demons of Snow! The winds must blow! Fast and Slow! To and Fro! High and Low! Freeze the crows! Like a pro! So much whoah! Let us know! Snow! Snow! Snow!"

[gatewhatgate]

The Monster claps a little at the end. He was completely and utterly eating up this nonsense. It all seemed pretty reasonable to him, especially since his excitement for school had cooled down a bunch in the past week or so. It was fun at first, but, y'know, homework.

Snow wasn't something he was really familiar with, but he'd heard stuff about it.

"I hope your gods answer your prayers! It would be really neat to build one of those snowman things."

[more_surreal]

Calvin was nodding and feeling encouraged by the Monster's understanding, but then horror struck at those last words. "Wait, hold on a second," he said ritual forgotten for the moment. "You've never built a snowman before?"

[gatewhatgate]

The Monster blinked a couple of times at Calvin's reaction. Was it that weird?

"No? I've never seen a lot of snow before."

And if there was snow, it wasn't like he was let outside much either.

[more_surreal]

Calvin was aghast at the thought of a kid, even a monster one, living without snow. "Oh man, have you been missing out!" He said. "I'm going to ask the Snow Demons for extra blizzards this year, just so you can get the full experience!"

[gatewhatgate]

Gosh, this kid was willing to help out a non-believer. This was a little odd, but also remarkably sensible.

"Oh, I can get Experience from it too? Cool!"

[more_surreal]

"You're going to love it," Calvin promised. "Unless you're allergic to snow or cold or anything." He frowned. He didn't know the rules for this kind of Monster! Whatever kind it was. "You're not one of those monsters that can only be hurt by specific temperatures, are you?"

[gatewhatgate]

The Monster pondered this seriously. Truthfully he had no clue! He tried to remember if he had been affected by weather, but he couldn't remember. Besides, thinking was hard.

"I dunno! I think it should be fine 'cause I'm not a monster anymore."

[more_surreal]

"Okay, good. It would really stink if you had to miss out on your first real winter because of elemental weaknesses or anything," Calvin said. All thoughts of burning were now forgotten, at least for the moment. He was now too busy looking forward to introducing the Monster to the joys of snowballs.