[one-shot] overcome
[one-shot] overcome
cnu/jinyoung
g | 1262 w
"If it's really hard, why do you try?" Jinyoung lifted his head up, eyes coming in contact with the other's dark orbs. "If it's really as hard as you say, why do you put yourself back together just to be taken apart again?" The older boy clasped his hands behind his neck and walked towards the other. "You're unhappy," he gently murmured, slowly brushing his fingers against Jinyoung's face to wipe the sweat drops away. Giving a short snort, Jinyoung picked himself up from the dusty floors of the practice room and turned away from Dongwoo.
"Don't tell me you've never thought about it; how we're almost in our twenties and the only thing we have to show for our lives are the sweat and tears we drown ourselves in," he quietly whispered. Clenching his fists together, Jinyoung dropped his head down to save whatever pride he had left. "I know it might be selfish of me, seeing as how there are so many others who would do anything to be in the position we're in, but I just, I don't know. This infinite loop almost seems to be mocking me, Dongwoo," he continued, eyes still boring holes into the floor.
The other only stared at his friend, allowing a silent reply to tangle itself between the two. As if interrupting the silence resounding throughout the room, thoughts began to flow through Dongwoo's head. The tired boy in front of him, the one full of fears and frustrations about his future, was supposed to lead their group. He was a bit skeptical because Jinyoung always seemed to be pessimistic towards their outcome as a group, but Dongwoo accepted it as a phase that came from being a trainee for too long.
"Sometimes, I just really want to give it all up and return back to Jung Jinyoung. Not this Jung Jinyoung, but Jung Jinyoung, the average human."
"Starting from today, you guys will be practicing as four till we decide whether or not we want to add another member," their manager announced, receiving questioning looks from the other four in the room.
"What do you mean four?" Junghwan widened his eyes and questioned. Dongwoo felt an unsettling feeling mix around his stomach as he remembered the conversation from a couple of nights before.
"Due to personal reasons, Jinyoung withdrew from his training," he replied, freezing all the movements of the members. Feeling his lip quiver, Dongwoo picked up his jacket and bolted out the door, ignoring the calls of his name.
"So this is what you go and do, Jung Jinyoung," Dongwoo thought as he quickly waved down a taxi.
"Towards Choongju, please."
"Thank you," he stated, placing the wallet back into his pocket. Running towards Jinyoung's apartment, Dongwoo tried to calm himself down before facing the other, but he could already feel anger rising through his body. Once he reached the right floor, he dashed towards the door and loudly knocked on Jinyoung's door.
"Who is it?" Dongwoo heard a small clack before the door opened, bringing him face-to-face with Jung Jinyoung, the average human. Once he realized who it was, Jinyoung quickly apologized and proceeded before attempting to close the door, but the other's strength prevented him from doing so.
"If I knew you were going to do this, I wouldn't have had that conversation with you. Did you think the best way to get through this was just to quit?" Dongwoo questioned with a louder tone. Raising his voice was one thing he tried to stay away from, especially when talking with Jinyoung, but he couldn't help himself. "If you quit now, what's going to happen to the team? It's a pity how our group was going to be stuck with a leader who would quit when things got rough," he spat out. The older boy could see how harsh of an impact his words were having on the other, but his actions were blinded by an overflow of emotions.
"I'm sorry," Jinyoung apologized.
I'm sorry I was unfit to be the leader, I'm sorry that I'm too incompetent to hold the group together, I'm sorry.
Sliding fingers through his hair, Dongwoo tried to hold back his frustrations and gripped the corner of a desk.
"It's okay, though. I already suggested for you to be the leader, and everyone from the company agreed that you would do well," Jinyoung replied with a shaky breath, lacking the courage to look at the other.
"Damn it, Jinyoung. Wasn't this your dream too?" he yelled back, grasping Jinyoung by the shoulders. "If you quit now, who's going to lead us? Who's going to tell Sunwoo and Junghwan to stop writing all over Chansik's notebooks? Who's going to-"
Overcome by a rush of anger, Dongwoo looked straight at the other and saw his eyes waver. "Who's going to go to the end with me?" he asked with a faltering voice. Jinyoung tried to pull away from the other's gaze, but found himself biting tears back instead. "Truthfully, I'm not sure how far I'll be able to go. You're telling me that I'm strong enough to lead the team, but I'm really not," Dongwoo continued, shifting his gaze to the mirror behind Jinyoung. "The team wouldn't only be losing a leader if you leave. I'd be losing my support, the reason why I can be strong like this," he murmured, turning Jinyoung towards the mirror.
Facing his own reflection in the mirror, Jinyoung noted the loss of weight in his cheeks and clear signs of weariness. Althougrh he would finally be relieving himself of this repetitive lifestyle, the idea didn't strike him as positively as it had before. Jinyoung craned his neck forward and noticed the identical wrinkles placed on Dongwoo's face. The craters on Dongwoo's face, where healthy and chubby cheeks used to be, and dark lines under his eyes allowed Jinyoung to realize that he wasn't the only one contributing all his time and effort in something indefinite.
"We're all gaining strength from one another. What do you think will happen to the balance if one of us were to drop out of the circle?" Jinyoung turned away from the gaze of Dongwoo's reflection to face the other. Dongwoo continued, "The five of us are what makes the group, nothing less, but I guess it's really not in my power to hold you back from your decision. Just know that it's probably going to be impossible for us to get through this if you're gone." Leaving Jinyoung in front of the mirror, Dongwoo began to stride towards the door.
"And know that I'm not just saying this to you as a team member, Jung Jinyoung, but as a friend," he quietly murmured before walking out of the apartment.
To. Jinyoung:
Jinyoung-ah, hi, it's Dongwoo ㅋ It's already nearing a year since we first met ㅋ. A lot has happened since then, I think we've made it this far because we stuck it out together. I probably would've had a really hard time without you. As a team member and as a friend, because you're here, it's really reassuring. Happy birthday today and in the future, let's overcoming tiring and difficult obstacles with the five of us. Happy birthday. - From Dongwoo
"B1A4, fighting!"
The bright, gleaming smiles on the five faces not only held cheerful memories, but also the tiring steps overcome to reach the point they stood at. Jinyoung turned to face Dongwoo as they made their way off the stage, and silently thanked him.
Because you're here, it's really reassuring.
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written for susan ((who also was the one to translate the small quote above!! cr. b1a4trans n_n)) this is my small present for you for allow me to be a slavedriver to you ♥♥ and ty to angi for beta'ing ;u; special luv for u ♥♥!!!