[S] The Guardian pages 29-33
Title: The Guardian Pg 29-33
Summary: Part 6 of a very angry roleplay summary
Word Count:
Rating/Warnings: Swearing and massive, massive fucking amounts of fail
Notes: IT'S OFFICIAL AMBER'S A MASOCHIST
Ohhh god, I thought I was done with this horror. OTL The things I do to amuse you bitches Pssh what the fuck ever we all know by now that Amber is a terrible masochist who loves every minute of this raging bitchery.
So we pick back up on page 29, which starts with some OOC whining about things being confusing because everyone and their goddamn mother was in Disney Castle (I do not blame them, I mean, seriously) and then there's Sieg doing more stuff that I have been informed he doesn't do. Sieg tells his sword to stay in the ground and then goes and says "oh gee you guys are 'ruff'".
More OOC babbling about this Eri chick, and then Zero post. Zero heals the cut Eri got from the Antlion (I am still calling BS on that shit, come on, Antlion was hard as shit).
Rikuuu ♥ He sees a connection between Akari being sick and Sora being sick, and wonders if there's a sickness going around that only affects certain people, and maybe Nex didn't have anything to do with it. Kairi tells Akari that Sora should be alright, and the brooms should know where he is. Before they can set off, though, Kairi gets a weird feeling, and Riku chucks her and Akari away. There's some silent BFF communication and Kairi understands, taking Akari off to find Sora while Riku sticks behind to talk to Sieg, who previously had cast like a nightmare field thing over the area. Riku remembers Xehanort-Ansem and is like "Pssh bitch this is kid's stuff compared to him." He tells Sieg if he wants a fight Riku will give him one, he's got too much shit to deal with to worry about Sieg.
Eri half passes out on Zero, blaming it on blood loss.
Akari follows Kairi and apologizes, saying Sora should have been fine.
Zero tells Eri she should have taken backup, tells her to rest, and asks if the Antlion is still alive. ...Eri you are retarded, she's supposedly connected to Ven but she's like "Hey guy I already know, let me introduce myself again as Aqua's successor", plus if her wound on her arm was so serious that she's now on the verge of passing out from blood loss why didn't she just cast her own goddamn cure spell? :/ Or drink a potion? And I highly doubt the Antlion's laying in pieces in the middle of the desert seeing as it was a Heartless and they don't leave bodies behind.
...Zero seems to ignore the fact that she said Aqua and be all "Ven's successor, cool, I'm a direct descended to Terra." Which, Zero, I hope you know, direct descendant means you're his son, KH is only 10 years after BBS, give about three more years for KH/CoM/KH II, and you'd be about 13-14 at the oldest. :/
ANYWAYS, he asks why she went alone. Eri says she "just appeared there" and Genie asked for help, she figured it'd be a few Fire Flowers, and it wound up being more.
Oh yay, Ana to the rescue in the OOC! She goes "hey fuckers wait, isn't Ven's successor SORA?" They go "LOLOLOL CANON IS HARD WE'RE JUST PULLING STUFF OUT OUR ASSES" and then when Ana is not amused by their bullshit they decide to change it to Aqua's successor. That explains that.
Zero tells Eri to rest again now that her wound is healed. Eri tries to play tough but she's still dizzy from all that blood loss *eye roll* and falls down. Zero helps her back into her chair and tells her again to rest. Jesus. ...She just knocked a book off of a shelf with a rock and started reading, she couldn't have asked Zero to get her a book?
...*FACEPALM* Zero decides to read 'Mickey's memoir', it told the story off all his adventures up to the ending events of Kingdom Hearts II. Right. Because they tell time by what game they ended on, instead of, say, "up until the fall of the Organization"?
Eri asks what he's reading and then her head hurts and then I think she complains about her difficult book choice, it's confusing. Zero replies it's a book the King wrote.
God, this is bori--NEW CHARACTER OH GOD WITH BLINDING LIME TEXT AND THERE'S LOTS OF IT, PLEASE DON'T SUCK ASS. *CROSS FINGERS IN VAIN*
...*FACE-U-PALM-U* yeah I'm sprucin' up my facepalms
So, this new guy, Zoul, is apparently really godly flawless looking with golden blond hair and 'crystal blue eyes' lololol and also he's almost six feet tall but only barley lololol BARLEY I want soup now. I'm like, dude, you don't have to give me a description of your character that tells me every. little. detail, you have a fucking picture of him in the post, we KNOW what he looks like.
So, Zoul has a magic red shield he found somewhere that tells him about the Keyblades and sends him on a magic journey to find the Keybladers, and also apparently tears his soul every time he uses it. XD
Oh, and the CT reappear. They tag Mik and Sik and then run off before both managing to codependently trip in front of Zoul.
OHHHH SHIIIIT, JAMES JUST BUSTED OUT A 9 POINT OOC RANT ♥
AHAHA and they take it like good little bitches. ♥
Lucrecia post! 8D Aww, Lucy bought a sexy dress for Even haha, lucky dog--*deep freeze*
Anyways XD Lucrecia buys a sexy dress for Even and then when she gets home she hears Even and Braig talking. She opens the door to the room they're in and asks what's up.
Aaand Mik and Sik continue to be totally boring, they go ask the CT if they are ok.
...*headwall headwall headwall* Maybe if I headwall enough, I will get brain damage, and I will finally understand all this bullshit. It will all become clear to me.
So ANOTHER new character, named BOV (the username is Fallen BOV, also) shows up in Cornerstoneless Castle--JUST A SECOND, have you guys ever seen Blazing Saddles (if not, go watch it now, it's amazing) and you know how they build the fake town full of dynamite to fool the bandits? I feel like this is not really Disney Castle, just as that was not truly Rock Ridge; instead, this is an elaborate duplicate filled to the gills with TNT, and Mickey is just waiting somewhere to turn his gaze away as he pushes down on the T-bar and blows all of this mind-fucking-numbing stupidity out of existence for the good of the universe.
ANYWAYS, BOV shows up in Cornerstoneless Castle though I get the feeling he doesn't know he's actually IN Cornerstoneless Castle and is like "Hmm I'm just here to relax, maybe I can kill someone! 8D"
OTL
GODDAMMIT YOU--Zoul is like "oh noes, people for me to interact with! *hide in bushes*"
*BLOW BRAINS OUT*
Then he sees BOV and goes to fight him or whatever.
KAIRI SWEET BREATH OF INTELLIGENCE
Now that she knows Akari is the Guardian, Kairi sees even more connection between what happened to Sora and Akari.
Sora's not in the room the brooms took him to. D8
BOV--oh thank god he started capitalizing it normally, Bov is like "dude with the shield you can't sneak up on me I will kill you."
OTL he felt like today was a good day to kill.
You are a moron.
Just.
Fuck.
OHHHH SHIIIIIIIT 8D
Sora wakes up, right, and is like "oh ow pain ow nausea D;" and stumbles around Disney Castle in a pained haze, eventually passing out in the Gummi Hangar, waking up again in the Gummi Ship, and then taking off in the Gummi Ship. He passes out during takeoff, and when he regains consciousness?
Totally fucking possessed by Vanitas. ♥
Masterful.
Zoul is like "lawl youth, but it's wasted on you, you must be a Nobody. Have at you, bitch!" and turns his 'mysterious I don't know what it is' magic shield into these 'blood blades' that are apparently 'feared as legend' by his people. :/ I'm like, then why the fuck did you say you don't know what the shield is?
Ass.
...Bov I think you got the whole idea of being a Nobody all wrong.
Nobodies don't take sadistic delight in killing Except Voxden and maybe Larxene because they are 'soulless monsters'; they are emotionless shells who might perhaps be mass murderers, but hardly sadistic mass murderers.
Because, you see, in order to be a sadist, you need to have the capacity to enjoy inflicting pain. >:/
ALSO, a Glaive? Not a sword. It's a type of polearm you fucking jackass, GOD.
Also, you are not scary or badass or even really anything but stupid, dude. He's like "oh sure I'll fight you, but man, I wonder if the CT wanna join. I'm gonna cut off a hand or a leg, what do you think I should pick?" Stop trying, this isn't scary or badass. It's kind of lame.
Zoul does not like the threatening of the childrens, and gets all "I will kick your ass if you try". Then he one-hits Bov with a stunning blast of electricity that knocks him out (he had permission but still dude, a little effort to your godmoding? ) and then tells the CT to run and warn everyone about the Nobody in the Castle.
...And then like a total fucktard he puts his weapon away and walks off leaving the Nobody unsupervised. :/
Mik and Sik take the CT out of there.
OH GODDAMMIT DRAI IS STILL HERE?
Shit. *kicks dirt*
Anyways she jumps out the window like a fucking moron and flies down to the battle all "yay a fight." Seriously I am not seeing why the fuck she got a Keyblade in the cosmic lottery.
*FACEPALM* And Bov gets back up like immediately, this is why we don't turn our back on stunned enemies jackass, and he runs straight at 'the children' (the twin sets) and swings his glaive over them. HERE KIDDIES LETS PLAY CATCH!!
...OTL
The CT are like "you guys go, we'll stay here" and then they draw their swords AND EVEN THEIR WEAPONS ARE CODEPENDENT WHAT THE FUCK, they drew their twin swords, well one sword for each twin but both swords made the same and they looked the same
TEMPTATION. TO DEVELOP. TWIN. MUSES. RISING.
They block Bov's move, and then Bov is like "run along children, I was just using you to fuck with that guy." Then he's like "D'aww I have to come back here some day, it's pretty and the kids are cute! I need to seek psychological help."
No, seriously.
I got to come back here someday it is prttey and the childern are so CUTE..I need to seek help.
Even though Bov has already pretty much ignored the children, Drai makes a point of chucking a Keyblade at him and telling him to leave the kids alone and fight her because "I need a good fight".
AAAAND Zoul sees her keyblade and decides he must protect her at all costs.
Bov complains that people here have a bad attitude and attacks Zoul. There is so much stupid misspelled dialogue in that post that I am not even going to fucking bother.
Eri please, stop even trying because you just fucking fail.
humminga song she had heard while she was in Agrabah. Something hebrewish she thought.... Hmm, maybe if Agrabah wasn't supposed to be ARABIA. This is just me looking on Wikipedia, but the majority of Arabia is Muslim, and also 80% of people who are Jewish live in Israel or the US. ALSO, um, pretty sure there's no Judaism in Kingdom Hearts--pretty sure there's no religion at all. Hebrew is a language that's pretty strongly associated with Judaism--so the language I believe you were looking for is Arabic. :/
ANYWAYS, Eri hobbles around the library and gets another book. SO INTERESTING.
YUFFIE! Yuffie tells Niv there's nice sunsets and maybe some kitschy T-shirts ahaha and that freebies are freebies and she isn't going to just help someone with Darkness eyes. She notices Vinxent and warns him things might get messy.
Drai, you need to learn to stop. fucking. godmoding.
She runs at Bov and kicks him in the face "hard enough to send him into a wall". She yells at him for mistaking her for a boy, though honestly she shouldn't fucking know that unless she reads minds (I would not be surprised goddamn Sues) because he never said anything aloud about it.
Bov calls her a flatchested man wannabe haha and pretty much says "thank you sir may I have another".
Zoul shoots lightning at him but used too much power so he gets a nosebleed.
... :/ Drai. Seriously. She's like, "ooh because I'm from a different world I have special abilities like making fireballs come out of my keyblade and surround you!" ...Pretty sure that's this thing called Firaga? You're not fucking special, jackass.
Bov...uh, ignores the attacks? Everyone here godmodes, jesus. He's just like "LAWL FIRE AND LIGHTNING HUH, NICE BUT THEY CAN'T TOUCH ME."
....
........
..........
*BLOW BRAINS OUT*
Drai just used the goddamn Mangekyou Sharingan.
Somewhere in my head, there are old disused Naruto muses who are just fucking disgusted.
Zoul goes to attack but sees that Drai is doing somethins weird, so he backs off.
And that concludes the amount of stupid I can handle right now, I have a headache now. OTL
More later on, I WILL summarize this entire bitch some day.
Summary: Part 6 of a very angry roleplay summary
Word Count:
Rating/Warnings: Swearing and massive, massive fucking amounts of fail
Notes: IT'S OFFICIAL AMBER'S A MASOCHIST
Ohhh god, I thought I was done with this horror. OTL The things I do to amuse you bitches Pssh what the fuck ever we all know by now that Amber is a terrible masochist who loves every minute of this raging bitchery.
So we pick back up on page 29, which starts with some OOC whining about things being confusing because everyone and their goddamn mother was in Disney Castle (I do not blame them, I mean, seriously) and then there's Sieg doing more stuff that I have been informed he doesn't do. Sieg tells his sword to stay in the ground and then goes and says "oh gee you guys are 'ruff'".
More OOC babbling about this Eri chick, and then Zero post. Zero heals the cut Eri got from the Antlion (I am still calling BS on that shit, come on, Antlion was hard as shit).
Rikuuu ♥ He sees a connection between Akari being sick and Sora being sick, and wonders if there's a sickness going around that only affects certain people, and maybe Nex didn't have anything to do with it. Kairi tells Akari that Sora should be alright, and the brooms should know where he is. Before they can set off, though, Kairi gets a weird feeling, and Riku chucks her and Akari away. There's some silent BFF communication and Kairi understands, taking Akari off to find Sora while Riku sticks behind to talk to Sieg, who previously had cast like a nightmare field thing over the area. Riku remembers Xehanort-Ansem and is like "Pssh bitch this is kid's stuff compared to him." He tells Sieg if he wants a fight Riku will give him one, he's got too much shit to deal with to worry about Sieg.
Eri half passes out on Zero, blaming it on blood loss.
Akari follows Kairi and apologizes, saying Sora should have been fine.
Zero tells Eri she should have taken backup, tells her to rest, and asks if the Antlion is still alive. ...Eri you are retarded, she's supposedly connected to Ven but she's like "Hey guy I already know, let me introduce myself again as Aqua's successor", plus if her wound on her arm was so serious that she's now on the verge of passing out from blood loss why didn't she just cast her own goddamn cure spell? :/ Or drink a potion? And I highly doubt the Antlion's laying in pieces in the middle of the desert seeing as it was a Heartless and they don't leave bodies behind.
...Zero seems to ignore the fact that she said Aqua and be all "Ven's successor, cool, I'm a direct descended to Terra." Which, Zero, I hope you know, direct descendant means you're his son, KH is only 10 years after BBS, give about three more years for KH/CoM/KH II, and you'd be about 13-14 at the oldest. :/
ANYWAYS, he asks why she went alone. Eri says she "just appeared there" and Genie asked for help, she figured it'd be a few Fire Flowers, and it wound up being more.
Oh yay, Ana to the rescue in the OOC! She goes "hey fuckers wait, isn't Ven's successor SORA?" They go "LOLOLOL CANON IS HARD WE'RE JUST PULLING STUFF OUT OUR ASSES" and then when Ana is not amused by their bullshit they decide to change it to Aqua's successor. That explains that.
Zero tells Eri to rest again now that her wound is healed. Eri tries to play tough but she's still dizzy from all that blood loss *eye roll* and falls down. Zero helps her back into her chair and tells her again to rest. Jesus. ...She just knocked a book off of a shelf with a rock and started reading, she couldn't have asked Zero to get her a book?
...*FACEPALM* Zero decides to read 'Mickey's memoir', it told the story off all his adventures up to the ending events of Kingdom Hearts II. Right. Because they tell time by what game they ended on, instead of, say, "up until the fall of the Organization"?
Eri asks what he's reading and then her head hurts and then I think she complains about her difficult book choice, it's confusing. Zero replies it's a book the King wrote.
God, this is bori--NEW CHARACTER OH GOD WITH BLINDING LIME TEXT AND THERE'S LOTS OF IT, PLEASE DON'T SUCK ASS. *CROSS FINGERS IN VAIN*
...*FACE-U-PALM-U* yeah I'm sprucin' up my facepalms
So, this new guy, Zoul, is apparently really godly flawless looking with golden blond hair and 'crystal blue eyes' lololol and also he's almost six feet tall but only barley lololol BARLEY I want soup now. I'm like, dude, you don't have to give me a description of your character that tells me every. little. detail, you have a fucking picture of him in the post, we KNOW what he looks like.
So, Zoul has a magic red shield he found somewhere that tells him about the Keyblades and sends him on a magic journey to find the Keybladers, and also apparently tears his soul every time he uses it. XD
Oh, and the CT reappear. They tag Mik and Sik and then run off before both managing to codependently trip in front of Zoul.
OHHHH SHIIIIT, JAMES JUST BUSTED OUT A 9 POINT OOC RANT ♥
AHAHA and they take it like good little bitches. ♥
Lucrecia post! 8D Aww, Lucy bought a sexy dress for Even haha, lucky dog--*deep freeze*
Anyways XD Lucrecia buys a sexy dress for Even and then when she gets home she hears Even and Braig talking. She opens the door to the room they're in and asks what's up.
Aaand Mik and Sik continue to be totally boring, they go ask the CT if they are ok.
...*headwall headwall headwall* Maybe if I headwall enough, I will get brain damage, and I will finally understand all this bullshit. It will all become clear to me.
So ANOTHER new character, named BOV (the username is Fallen BOV, also) shows up in Cornerstoneless Castle--JUST A SECOND, have you guys ever seen Blazing Saddles (if not, go watch it now, it's amazing) and you know how they build the fake town full of dynamite to fool the bandits? I feel like this is not really Disney Castle, just as that was not truly Rock Ridge; instead, this is an elaborate duplicate filled to the gills with TNT, and Mickey is just waiting somewhere to turn his gaze away as he pushes down on the T-bar and blows all of this mind-fucking-numbing stupidity out of existence for the good of the universe.
ANYWAYS, BOV shows up in Cornerstoneless Castle though I get the feeling he doesn't know he's actually IN Cornerstoneless Castle and is like "Hmm I'm just here to relax, maybe I can kill someone! 8D"
OTL
GODDAMMIT YOU--Zoul is like "oh noes, people for me to interact with! *hide in bushes*"
*BLOW BRAINS OUT*
Then he sees BOV and goes to fight him or whatever.
KAIRI SWEET BREATH OF INTELLIGENCE
Now that she knows Akari is the Guardian, Kairi sees even more connection between what happened to Sora and Akari.
Sora's not in the room the brooms took him to. D8
BOV--oh thank god he started capitalizing it normally, Bov is like "dude with the shield you can't sneak up on me I will kill you."
OTL he felt like today was a good day to kill.
You are a moron.
Just.
Fuck.
OHHHH SHIIIIIIIT 8D
Sora wakes up, right, and is like "oh ow pain ow nausea D;" and stumbles around Disney Castle in a pained haze, eventually passing out in the Gummi Hangar, waking up again in the Gummi Ship, and then taking off in the Gummi Ship. He passes out during takeoff, and when he regains consciousness?
Totally fucking possessed by Vanitas. ♥
Masterful.
Zoul is like "lawl youth, but it's wasted on you, you must be a Nobody. Have at you, bitch!" and turns his 'mysterious I don't know what it is' magic shield into these 'blood blades' that are apparently 'feared as legend' by his people. :/ I'm like, then why the fuck did you say you don't know what the shield is?
Ass.
...Bov I think you got the whole idea of being a Nobody all wrong.
Nobodies don't take sadistic delight in killing Except Voxden and maybe Larxene because they are 'soulless monsters'; they are emotionless shells who might perhaps be mass murderers, but hardly sadistic mass murderers.
Because, you see, in order to be a sadist, you need to have the capacity to enjoy inflicting pain. >:/
ALSO, a Glaive? Not a sword. It's a type of polearm you fucking jackass, GOD.
Also, you are not scary or badass or even really anything but stupid, dude. He's like "oh sure I'll fight you, but man, I wonder if the CT wanna join. I'm gonna cut off a hand or a leg, what do you think I should pick?" Stop trying, this isn't scary or badass. It's kind of lame.
Zoul does not like the threatening of the childrens, and gets all "I will kick your ass if you try". Then he one-hits Bov with a stunning blast of electricity that knocks him out (he had permission but still dude, a little effort to your godmoding? ) and then tells the CT to run and warn everyone about the Nobody in the Castle.
...And then like a total fucktard he puts his weapon away and walks off leaving the Nobody unsupervised. :/
Mik and Sik take the CT out of there.
OH GODDAMMIT DRAI IS STILL HERE?
Shit. *kicks dirt*
Anyways she jumps out the window like a fucking moron and flies down to the battle all "yay a fight." Seriously I am not seeing why the fuck she got a Keyblade in the cosmic lottery.
*FACEPALM* And Bov gets back up like immediately, this is why we don't turn our back on stunned enemies jackass, and he runs straight at 'the children' (the twin sets) and swings his glaive over them. HERE KIDDIES LETS PLAY CATCH!!
...OTL
The CT are like "you guys go, we'll stay here" and then they draw their swords AND EVEN THEIR WEAPONS ARE CODEPENDENT WHAT THE FUCK, they drew their twin swords, well one sword for each twin but both swords made the same and they looked the same
TEMPTATION. TO DEVELOP. TWIN. MUSES. RISING.
They block Bov's move, and then Bov is like "run along children, I was just using you to fuck with that guy." Then he's like "D'aww I have to come back here some day, it's pretty and the kids are cute! I need to seek psychological help."
No, seriously.
I got to come back here someday it is prttey and the childern are so CUTE..I need to seek help.
Even though Bov has already pretty much ignored the children, Drai makes a point of chucking a Keyblade at him and telling him to leave the kids alone and fight her because "I need a good fight".
AAAAND Zoul sees her keyblade and decides he must protect her at all costs.
Bov complains that people here have a bad attitude and attacks Zoul. There is so much stupid misspelled dialogue in that post that I am not even going to fucking bother.
Eri please, stop even trying because you just fucking fail.
humminga song she had heard while she was in Agrabah. Something hebrewish she thought.... Hmm, maybe if Agrabah wasn't supposed to be ARABIA. This is just me looking on Wikipedia, but the majority of Arabia is Muslim, and also 80% of people who are Jewish live in Israel or the US. ALSO, um, pretty sure there's no Judaism in Kingdom Hearts--pretty sure there's no religion at all. Hebrew is a language that's pretty strongly associated with Judaism--so the language I believe you were looking for is Arabic. :/
ANYWAYS, Eri hobbles around the library and gets another book. SO INTERESTING.
YUFFIE! Yuffie tells Niv there's nice sunsets and maybe some kitschy T-shirts ahaha and that freebies are freebies and she isn't going to just help someone with Darkness eyes. She notices Vinxent and warns him things might get messy.
Drai, you need to learn to stop. fucking. godmoding.
She runs at Bov and kicks him in the face "hard enough to send him into a wall". She yells at him for mistaking her for a boy, though honestly she shouldn't fucking know that unless she reads minds (I would not be surprised goddamn Sues) because he never said anything aloud about it.
Bov calls her a flatchested man wannabe haha and pretty much says "thank you sir may I have another".
Zoul shoots lightning at him but used too much power so he gets a nosebleed.
... :/ Drai. Seriously. She's like, "ooh because I'm from a different world I have special abilities like making fireballs come out of my keyblade and surround you!" ...Pretty sure that's this thing called Firaga? You're not fucking special, jackass.
Bov...uh, ignores the attacks? Everyone here godmodes, jesus. He's just like "LAWL FIRE AND LIGHTNING HUH, NICE BUT THEY CAN'T TOUCH ME."
....
........
..........
*BLOW BRAINS OUT*
Drai just used the goddamn Mangekyou Sharingan.
Somewhere in my head, there are old disused Naruto muses who are just fucking disgusted.
Zoul goes to attack but sees that Drai is doing somethins weird, so he backs off.
And that concludes the amount of stupid I can handle right now, I have a headache now. OTL
More later on, I WILL summarize this entire bitch some day.