Happy Valentine's Day
Title: Be My Valentine?
Author: captainswank
Pairing: wincest
Rating: PG
Words: ~1,300
Summary: Written after 8.14. Sam knows what Dean wants. Sam knows what Sam wants. Dean's still in the dark.
Sam looked up from his reading to see Dean sliding into his jacket and heading towards the door.
“Going out?” Sam asked, appreciating the special care Dean seemed to have taken to make himself presentable.
“Yeah, got me some Unattached Drifter Christmas presents to unwrap,” Dean replied, almost vibrating with childlike excitement.
“What, you’re not gonna stick around and help me with the research tonight?” Sam tried for a mock-pout but it came out more of a smile, which Dean returned twofold.
“Oh, I see how it is. Want me all to yourself! Sorry Sammy, if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it.” Dean waved his hand teasingly and was out the door.
“Right,” Sam muttered, with a little laugh.
But he didn’t return to his reading.
***When Dean got back to the bunker he found Sam just removing his coat as well.
“So you decided to go out too? I was just thinking you deserved some extracurricular activity myself. Where’d you go?” Dean winked and gave him a congratulatory slap on the back.
“Why’re you back so soon?” Sam answered. Dean usually went for the long haul on his little outings, especially on this night of all nights.
“Dunno, man. Guess I just wasn’t feeling it.” Dean shrugged casually.
“On Valentine’s Day?” Sam rushed over and put his hand against Dean’s forehead. “Oh god, what’s wrong? Are you sick? Are you cursed?” Dean shoved his brother’s hand away roughly.
“Fuck off, jerkwad, it just wasn’t happening, okay?” Dean turned his back to his brother and headed towards the kitchen. Sam was joking, mostly, but he was still a little worried about Dean. It didn’t look like he wanted to discuss it, though, and when Dean didn’t want a discussion it wasn’t worth pushing it. Sam would just have to stick to the other buttons he could push.
“You don’t have to be embarrassed, Dean, they have pills for that now!” he called after his brother’s retreating back, and was rewarded with a one-finger salute.
***The ancient tomes and texts Sam now had access to were dense and thick, and it was far too easy to become completely lost in them. So he was caught by surprise when he looked up from his reading to see two steaming plates of lasagna and a couple of glasses of red wine in front of him.
“Oh my god,” Sam said, wide-eyed, looking from Dean to the food to Dean again.
“It’s better than you deserve,” Dean admonished, trying to look serious.
“Yeah, no, for sure,” Sam said, still in awe. “I’m sorry I made fun of your dick, dude. Totally uncalled for.” Sam was pretty sure he was drooling a little.
“You’re damn right you’re sorry, Sammy,” Dean said with a nod. “You can grovel at my feet some more later tonight. Now, we eat. Dig in!”
Sam dove into the lasagna with gusto, pleased to discover that it was hot and delicious and perfect. He was so into it he barely noticed his brother’s “slow down there, buddy, before you choke,” and the fact that Dean barely touched his own, so wrapped up as he was in watching Sam eat and enjoy himself.
“Wow, Dean, holy shit. That was incredible!” Sam managed when he was done, his plate completely clean.
“Don’t look so surprised. I’m a versatile individual,” he replied, with a patented Dean pout.
“Of course you are, Dean. But, uh. I’ve actually got a surprise for you too.” Dean’s pout transformed into a grin. Surprises!
“I was thinking about what you said earlier today…” Sam began, and Dean’s smile faltered a little. What did he say this time?
“What?” he asked.
“And it’s Valentine’s Day and, uh…” The smile really losing strength. Where was this going?
“What.” Dean was confused.
“And all that stuff about happy endings…” The smile vanished.
“What.”
Sam got up from his chair and dropped to one knee before his brother, grabbing Dean’s hand and pressing something small and warm and round into his palm.
“Dean Winchester, will you-” Dean leaped back as if he’d been scalded.
“No!” The look on his face was mostly one of horror, and it was hilarious.
“-Will you make me-” Sam tried gamely through his giggling.
“No!” Dean kept backing away, looking at Sam as if he maybe had an extra eyeball in the middle of his forehead.
“-Make me the-” Sam couldn’t even finish, too caught up in his own amusement.
“No! No, what is wrong with you, no!” And then Dean practically flew into his room, slamming the door behind him.
And Sam fell back onto the ground and threw his hand over his face, shoulders shaking with laughter.
***Sam knew that was the way Dean was going to react; it never took much to freak his brother out and he did have to admit that what he just did was pretty damn freaky. But Dean had been locked up in his room for hours now, and Sam hadn’t heard a sound or felt any movement coming from in there since Dean had first ran off. He decided it was time to check on him.
He knocked quietly a couple of times with no answer, and then tentatively opened the door to find his brother stretched out on his bed.
“Bet you think you’re real funny,” Dean said gruffly, looking down at something he was restlessly fiddling with that was hidden in his hands.
Sam nodded as his lips turned down at the corners. “I’m fairly amusing, yeah,” he replied. “So… do you have an answer?”
“Sam!” Dean slammed his head back against the wall. Sam stepped into the room and took a deep breath.
“You think I didn’t mean it.” No laughter this time.
Dean shook his head. “But you didn’t mean it, not really.” He brought his head up but still wouldn’t look at his brother. He pulled his hands apart and Sam could see the slim silver ring he had given him, glinting on his finger. “I know what you want, Sam, even if you don’t know you want it. I know what you need to be happy. It’s a life with-”
“Dean.” Sam stopped him before he could give his speech from the other night all over again. “I didn’t know how else to show you, to prove to you, to make you see.”
“Sammy, come on.” A little pleading there, hidden in Dean’s voice. Sam stepped closer to the bed.
“I knew you wouldn’t believe a word I said so I thought I could at least show you, man. Show you what I want,” he finished, whispering. Sam made his eyes meet Dean’s and tried to see if he could sear understanding into his brother’s brain, to see if he could at least make Dean feel him if he wasn’t going to listen.
“This?” Dean asked, gesturing to the room, the guns and knives and weapons. The life.
“This.” Sam answered quietly, eyes still on Dean’s, who shut his own tightly, flinched away, ‘cause this was way too much, way too much for both of them.
“Don’t even say it, Dean, don’t even think it, it’s you, just fucking accept it, take it, take this from me, it’s you.” There was a silence, broken by Dean’s deep, deep breath as he tried to pull all the fractured pieces of himself together in the face of Sam’s attack.
A tiny slice of silence, and then-
“You know this is so fucking gay,”
“Dean.”
“You know this isn’t even legal-”
“Dean.”
“Shit, Sammy.” Dean sighed, let all that air out, let the fractures form again but this time the pieces fell into his brother’s hands. Took off his own silver band that he usually wore and chucked it at Sam’s forehead. It surprised him but he still caught it when it bounced down into his hands.
“Dean. Dean,” Sam said again, not sure if he was gonna cry, or shout, or fall over, not sure what was happening. So he started talking and he couldn’t stop: “Dean, god, Dean, not gonna leave you, never gonna leave you, don’t wanna-”
“Shut up, Sam,” Dean said, and kissed the words out of his mouth.