(no subject)
I’m borrowing this from lbilover and hope to see more people joining in. I’d really love to talk more about writing, how it works and what it means and all that - but I sort of needed a prompt to get started on it.
1. How about a brief introduction?
Actually, talking about myself makes me feel incredibly awkward, so I’d rather avoid that... On the other hand, I’ll happily gnaw your ear off once I get into things I’m passionate about - and that probably says more about me than a proper introduction anyway. :) Besides writing and Tolkien, my passions include all things medieval, literature, trees, and cats. I think that covers the most important bases. :)
2. What got you into fan fiction (and/or adopting muses)?
Looking back on it, I’d say it was a long, slow process that finally got kick-started when I fell in love with Luke and Han of Star Wars, years ago. But as long as I can remember, I’ve made up stories in my head about my favourite characters in books and movies and tv shows, probably beginning with the hobbits when I was barely a teenager. I discovered fanfic at some time around 1990 (then still mostly printed in zines that weren’t easy to come by) and had the typical oh goody, you’re not the only one! reaction. Happy excitement doesn’t begin to describe it! By the time the LotR movies were released, I’d been writing Star Wars stories (and publishing zines) for years, and I’d looked for Frodo/Sam stories online, too (but found only a handful). Still, I’d never considered actually writing Tolkien-based fanfic.
A week before the release of FotR, I bought the soundtrack and suddenly could think of nothing else. I was a babbling bundle of electrified anticipation for days! And then, finally getting to see the movie melted me into puddles of sheer bliss. After that experience, it just wasn’t a question anymore whether I’d work up the nerve to try writing about Sam and Frodo - I knew I just had to. Somehow. It was still a completely daunting notion. Although I got started on my first story within days, it certainly didn’t come easy. I wrote one paragraph, changed every word in it half a dozen times, then deleted the whole paragraph and started over. I thought I’d never get it right. But I had to, all the same.
3. What kind of fan fiction do you write?
Tolkien-based stories, from gen to explicit slash, with an absolutely undeniable focus on Sam/Frodo and hobbits in general.
4. Do you write for the same pairings/characters?
As for pairings, everything I’ve written so far involves Sam/Frodo. (Goes to show I’m the proud owner of a one-track mind. :) But I love pretty much everything about Tolkien’s writings and Middle-earth and enjoy taking a look at the evolution of Frodo’s and Sam’s bond through all its stages and within different contexts. Hobbits (from the marginal characters who received only passing mention in the book to the Gaffer, Merry, Pippin and Bilbo) have always been my focus and I feel most comfortable writing them, but I’m curious to explore pretty much every other character who enters into the story of Frodo and Sam - especially Aragorn, Faramir and Gandalf.
5. What is your most popular fic and why do you think people like it so?
I honestly have no clue what would count as my most popular story, but a couple of very kind readers have recently told me that their favourite is Spirit, so I can only point to that piece - and it means a whole lot to me that this particular story has stayed in people’s minds. It’s my one and only story so far that deals with Sam’s journey to Valinor, his reunion with Frodo, and the many transitions involved. It’s also a fairly experimental piece, since I tried to translate the transition to another reality into the structure of the story, which is essentially a collage of fragments and possibilities. Because of that, it really doesn’t make for easy reading, and I’m all the more grateful that it works for some readers. As a writing experience, it really stands out in my memory - it felt like reaching (or maybe I should say struggling) for a completely different level of writing, and I treasure it for that. I’m not sure I can explain why readers like it, though. For everyone who cares about Frodo and Sam, a Valinor/Eressëa story is always going to be special, because their separation at the Havens is so very hard to bear. At the same time, it isn’t easy at all to imagine what that other reality could be like for them, and what their reunion meant after such a long time. I’d like to think that with Spirit I managed to find some images and moments that felt believable to readers.
6. Forget other people, what is the fanfic you've written that you're most proud of?
I’m going to cheat here, because I’ll name an entire series of ten stories - Light Passing Between - but that’s the honest truth. This series deals with another transition: Frodo’s and Sam’s difficult homecoming after the Quest and the complex process of change and adjustment that leads to the point where Sam decides to marry Rosie, and Frodo asks Sam to come and live with him in Bag End. Tolkien’s descriptions after the Scouring of the Shire highlight some important moments and turning points but also leave us guessing a lot. At least I’ve always felt that Sam’s and Frodo’s choices towards the end weren’t fully explained - nor were they really clear to me. Also, although Rosie plays such a significant part in Sam’s life, she’s a rather sketchy character in the book, and we learn very little about Sam’s relationship with her. It was in any case a huge challenge for me to explore the context behind and around those known decisions, to approach Rosie from the perspective of an already established love relationship between Frodo and Sam, and to appreciate her and her marriage to Sam on its own terms. Off and on, I worked on this series for about two years, and while some of these pieces involved every imaginable sort of frustration, from sleepless nights to hair-tearing annoyance at myself, it was an amazing experience overall.
7. Do you find writing easy? Hard? What aspects do you struggle with?
Some stories seem to emerge of their own accord, and of course it’s sheer bliss when that happens! They run through my head almost complete, so that I only need to concentrate on finding the proper expression. But that’s a rare thing to happen, and the rest of the writing process is never without difficulty for me and often quite hard. I generally try to approach everything I write from the characters’ subjective perspective, so that every element in a story will convey their unique perceptions of themselves and the world around them. Ideally, I’d like the entire narrative to reflect their individual voice and personality, so that my own kind of thinking, my own beliefs and experiences aren’t present at all (not that that can ever be achieved, it’s just what I’m aiming at). It’s this aspect more than any other that makes writing difficult for me. I’m a modern intellectual after all, and I’ve never had to face anything that would compare to the trials and hardships Frodo and Sam went through. Writing is a constant process of reaching beyond myself and grappling with the boundaries and barriers that get in the way.
8. Write a few sentences of your favorite pairing or character.
Since I’m totally unable to just pull a couple of lines from thin air, here’s a snippet from an unfinished story...
When he turned his head, Sam stood between a pair of old willows, one hand resting against the cracked grey bark. The sight struck Frodo like a blow to his breast - as though for a time he had lost his awareness of where Sam was. Now it rushed him with piercing surprise, clear and close in one breath. It was only when a deeper colouring brushed Sam's face that Frodo realised how long he had stared at him. But Sam did not glance aside, and neither did Frodo.
9. Are there any fan fiction trends/cliches you hate?
Um. I guess I’ll have to admit that nothing makes me bristle so much as a portrayal of Sam as sweet-but-dumb, and smotheringly protective of Frodo but clueless when it comes to the Ring and the Quest. Happily this isn’t at all a cliché in hobbit-centric stories, but it sometimes shows up in pieces that focus on Men or Elves. In these genres, hobbits in general are sometimes portrayed as childlike (if not childish), and Sam serves as the primary example to illustrate the point. IMO the movies have contributed to that impression (though it’s certainly not Sean Astin’s fault!), because many of the book-moments that show Sam’s wit and intuitions, his gift for poetry as well as his understanding of Frodo’s struggle with the Ring, were not taken up into the movies. But whatever the reason, I confess that if I come across a dense, silly Sam in a story, I’m likely to stop reading right there.
10. Are you guilty of any of the trends you hate?
I certainly hope not! If I ever ended up making Sam look dumb, I’d crawl off to hide in some dark corner for a very long time. ;)
11. What was the first fandom you wrote for? Do you still write for it?
Star Wars, mostly Han/Luke slash and some gen stories. I wrote obsessively in that fandom for about eight years (and I’m still very fond of it), but now I no longer do.
12. Name your OTPs and explain what it is about them you love to write.
Obviously, I can only name Frodo and Sam here. Now where to begin? Their bond is such a complex thing, and it has always been a source of inspiration, awe, excitement, curiosity and delight to me. What fascinates me the most is perhaps that their love transcends so many boundaries: in the process, they find and sustain a deep, abiding love that encompasses all the differences between them (from different social classes and backgrounds to distinct personalities, minds and perspectives). These differences aren’t obstacles, they enrich their bond and their experience of the world. Another aspect that speaks to me is that their love is based on friendship, trust and respect, and grows from there over many almost imperceptible stages until it embraces everything they are. (And I think this is true whether you see their relationship as romantic/erotic or not - that’s almost a minor point, really.) The equality they achieve, and the balance of two unique individuals (thrown into a unique situation) has always captured and moved me. Then there’s the fact that they achieve truly heroic feats and at the same time remain down-to-earth people - in one word: hobbits :) - with their obvious weaknesses beside their tremendous strengths. I could go on and on, but I hope this serves for a start. :)
13. What would you call your writing style?
I guess I can sidestep that difficult question by quoting readers’ opinions. My style is very frequently called lyrical, and I think that sums up its best qualities as well as its worst failings (though I realize that readers mean it as a compliment, and I appreciate that very much!). I’m very aware that my stories are usually full of images and descriptions that move beyond the factual, and I generally have to restrain myself not to overdo it. The reason why I do it, though, is that I want to convey the atmosphere of a world that differs very much from ours, and the moods, perceptions and emotions of characters who’ve been through extraordinary experiences. Conventional language with conventional meanings often can’t reach those places, so by playing with language and imagery, I hope to suggest a different time and place and experiences that differ profoundly from my own. I generally try not to pin anything down to a single, hard-and-fast meaning. At best, I think this can work to trigger readers’ imagination and act as a stepping-stone to new notions about the characters and their world. At worst, it seems overwrought and annoyingly vague, if not murky. There’s a thin line between opening up a space of imagination and leaving everything unclear and overly wordy. In hindsight, I feel that few stories of mine - if any - really manage to maintain the balance throughout, but I’m constantly working on improving it, at least.
14. Do you read other people's fan fiction? If so, what do you find yourself reading the most?
Due to lack of time, I generally read fanfic in sporadic bursts. Of course I mostly home in on hobbit stories (Frodo/Sam preferably :), but I also tremendously enjoy reading fics that approach LotR from different angles - for instance, stories adopting a non-slash view of the hobbits, or pieces that focus on the perspective of Men and Elves at any point in the history of Middle-earth. These different perspectives help me rethink my own understanding of Tolkien, not to mention that they often provide delightful discoveries.
15. Name one thing you'd love to write but have been too afraid or too shy to do.
Only one thing? Hah. By now I’m no longer shy about writing hobbit stories, but there’s still a lot in Middle-earth I’ll approach only with much dithering and trepidation. Elves (and everything connected with them, including the Undying Lands) are probably the most daunting to me... In many ways, they’re awe-inspiringly alien, from their experience of time to their specific forms of expression. I can totally feel with Frodo’s shocked amazement at the Council of Elrond, when he realizes that Elrond was part of the Last Alliance, thousands of years before! It’s definitely challenging to write Elves believably, without over-humanizing them or turning them into idealized but lifeless icons.
So much for what I find daunting. What makes me dizzy with apprehension is the notion of writing about the period immediately before Frodo left Middle-earth. Not only because the ultimate consequence - Frodo’s and Sam’s separation by the Havens - is still as heart-rending to me as it was when I first read LotR, but also because it must have been such an excruciatingly difficult time for them both. Frodo, I think, would never have left Sam and the Shire if he hadn’t felt an absolute need to do that, so that at some point his decision became inevitable. But what led to this point? His injuries clearly play a part, but it seems as if the book reveals only fractions of a long and painful process, and beside haunting memories, Frodo also seems to go through a transformation no one (including Frodo himself) fully understands. How did Frodo deal with it, and how did he come to terms with the notion of leaving? How much did Sam know or guess? What did it mean for their relationship? If I tried hard enough, I could possibly come up with a couple of fragmentary answers, but I think I’ll need much more time to reach anything approaching comprehension - if I ever do. And then, comprehension is one thing - emotionally, writing about this period is going to be at least as difficult, if I ever venture there.
16. Do you feel uncomfortable taking criticism? Or worse, do you have the dreaded bloated ego?
Ask my blessedly kind, insightful and patient beta-readers! Yeah, I know that’s a cop-out... so I’ll say that I have a fairly well-developed ego (hopefully not bloated though!) when it comes to my technical writing abilities. By now, I think I’m basically aware of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer, and I deeply appreciate beta-help. I’m always open to criticism, in fact I consider detailed constructive criticism an incredible gift - to know that someone else spent so much time and thought on something I’ve written really means a lot. Without it, I’d have to fall back on my own devices, to improve my writing and learn from my mistakes, and it’s a hell of a lot easier to do that with the assistance of a perceptive reader and an external perspective. My basic conviction is that there’s always room for improvement and that a writer can never look at her own story and hope for a completely neutral and objective perspective. So, criticism is a good thing, though I’d be a liar to say it never hurts. But as much as I trust my beta-readers, I don’t always take their advice and can get pretty stubborn about certain elements in a story that are fixed in my mind. Sometimes I’ll let such a thing go after long discussion, often I won’t. Still, those discussions are always tremendously helpful and I wouldn’t want to do without them. Criticism from readers, once a story has been posted, is also very welcome, but most of us probably don’t feel comfortable with criticizing fics in public, so it doesn’t happen all that often (unfortunately, IMO). I’m always ready to go back to a story I’d considered finished and work on it some more.
17. When you write, is there anything that helps?
Quiet, absence of time-constraints, and trees within view. :) When I’m stressed, I usually try to relax and shift my focus before I start to write - listening to music and reading something completely different helps a lot with that.
18. What inspires you?
That’s easy. (1) Trees. (No, seriously! :) I take long walks (or go for hikes when I can) to be out among trees, and there’s no better way for me to relax and find my inner balance. Best of all, it allows my mind to shut up, and I need that complete quiet to be able to write. So it’s usually when I’m outdoors, not thinking of anything at all, that the first notions of stories will suddenly come into my head. (2) Reading. While I’m reading books or fanfic I enjoy, I often find that descriptions or images will develop a life of their own within my mind and take me to a place where new ideas arise. (Music plays a part as well and works for in a very similar way for me.)
19. Lastly, how would you sum up your fan fiction experiences and you as a writer?
Sum up? Forget it. ;) I could never write a drabble, and I’m just as hopeless at summaries. Give me time and space to write an epic, then I might come up with something sensible. But okay, for what it’s worth, here’s the telegram version: my fanfiction experience is bliss - joy, ruptures, new discoveries, experimentation, constant challenges, all of that. I can’t tell how much of it is reflected in my writing, but hopefully some of it shows through.
20. Tag some friends, because they'll hate you for it.
Yup, that’s why I won’t do it. :) But I’d really love to see all my LJ friends who write stories answer these questions, as I’m curious to hear what their experience with writing about the hobbits and/or Middle-earth (or anything else) has been like. So, anyone who feels like it, please speak up!
1. How about a brief introduction?
Actually, talking about myself makes me feel incredibly awkward, so I’d rather avoid that... On the other hand, I’ll happily gnaw your ear off once I get into things I’m passionate about - and that probably says more about me than a proper introduction anyway. :) Besides writing and Tolkien, my passions include all things medieval, literature, trees, and cats. I think that covers the most important bases. :)
2. What got you into fan fiction (and/or adopting muses)?
Looking back on it, I’d say it was a long, slow process that finally got kick-started when I fell in love with Luke and Han of Star Wars, years ago. But as long as I can remember, I’ve made up stories in my head about my favourite characters in books and movies and tv shows, probably beginning with the hobbits when I was barely a teenager. I discovered fanfic at some time around 1990 (then still mostly printed in zines that weren’t easy to come by) and had the typical oh goody, you’re not the only one! reaction. Happy excitement doesn’t begin to describe it! By the time the LotR movies were released, I’d been writing Star Wars stories (and publishing zines) for years, and I’d looked for Frodo/Sam stories online, too (but found only a handful). Still, I’d never considered actually writing Tolkien-based fanfic.
A week before the release of FotR, I bought the soundtrack and suddenly could think of nothing else. I was a babbling bundle of electrified anticipation for days! And then, finally getting to see the movie melted me into puddles of sheer bliss. After that experience, it just wasn’t a question anymore whether I’d work up the nerve to try writing about Sam and Frodo - I knew I just had to. Somehow. It was still a completely daunting notion. Although I got started on my first story within days, it certainly didn’t come easy. I wrote one paragraph, changed every word in it half a dozen times, then deleted the whole paragraph and started over. I thought I’d never get it right. But I had to, all the same.
3. What kind of fan fiction do you write?
Tolkien-based stories, from gen to explicit slash, with an absolutely undeniable focus on Sam/Frodo and hobbits in general.
4. Do you write for the same pairings/characters?
As for pairings, everything I’ve written so far involves Sam/Frodo. (Goes to show I’m the proud owner of a one-track mind. :) But I love pretty much everything about Tolkien’s writings and Middle-earth and enjoy taking a look at the evolution of Frodo’s and Sam’s bond through all its stages and within different contexts. Hobbits (from the marginal characters who received only passing mention in the book to the Gaffer, Merry, Pippin and Bilbo) have always been my focus and I feel most comfortable writing them, but I’m curious to explore pretty much every other character who enters into the story of Frodo and Sam - especially Aragorn, Faramir and Gandalf.
5. What is your most popular fic and why do you think people like it so?
I honestly have no clue what would count as my most popular story, but a couple of very kind readers have recently told me that their favourite is Spirit, so I can only point to that piece - and it means a whole lot to me that this particular story has stayed in people’s minds. It’s my one and only story so far that deals with Sam’s journey to Valinor, his reunion with Frodo, and the many transitions involved. It’s also a fairly experimental piece, since I tried to translate the transition to another reality into the structure of the story, which is essentially a collage of fragments and possibilities. Because of that, it really doesn’t make for easy reading, and I’m all the more grateful that it works for some readers. As a writing experience, it really stands out in my memory - it felt like reaching (or maybe I should say struggling) for a completely different level of writing, and I treasure it for that. I’m not sure I can explain why readers like it, though. For everyone who cares about Frodo and Sam, a Valinor/Eressëa story is always going to be special, because their separation at the Havens is so very hard to bear. At the same time, it isn’t easy at all to imagine what that other reality could be like for them, and what their reunion meant after such a long time. I’d like to think that with Spirit I managed to find some images and moments that felt believable to readers.
6. Forget other people, what is the fanfic you've written that you're most proud of?
I’m going to cheat here, because I’ll name an entire series of ten stories - Light Passing Between - but that’s the honest truth. This series deals with another transition: Frodo’s and Sam’s difficult homecoming after the Quest and the complex process of change and adjustment that leads to the point where Sam decides to marry Rosie, and Frodo asks Sam to come and live with him in Bag End. Tolkien’s descriptions after the Scouring of the Shire highlight some important moments and turning points but also leave us guessing a lot. At least I’ve always felt that Sam’s and Frodo’s choices towards the end weren’t fully explained - nor were they really clear to me. Also, although Rosie plays such a significant part in Sam’s life, she’s a rather sketchy character in the book, and we learn very little about Sam’s relationship with her. It was in any case a huge challenge for me to explore the context behind and around those known decisions, to approach Rosie from the perspective of an already established love relationship between Frodo and Sam, and to appreciate her and her marriage to Sam on its own terms. Off and on, I worked on this series for about two years, and while some of these pieces involved every imaginable sort of frustration, from sleepless nights to hair-tearing annoyance at myself, it was an amazing experience overall.
7. Do you find writing easy? Hard? What aspects do you struggle with?
Some stories seem to emerge of their own accord, and of course it’s sheer bliss when that happens! They run through my head almost complete, so that I only need to concentrate on finding the proper expression. But that’s a rare thing to happen, and the rest of the writing process is never without difficulty for me and often quite hard. I generally try to approach everything I write from the characters’ subjective perspective, so that every element in a story will convey their unique perceptions of themselves and the world around them. Ideally, I’d like the entire narrative to reflect their individual voice and personality, so that my own kind of thinking, my own beliefs and experiences aren’t present at all (not that that can ever be achieved, it’s just what I’m aiming at). It’s this aspect more than any other that makes writing difficult for me. I’m a modern intellectual after all, and I’ve never had to face anything that would compare to the trials and hardships Frodo and Sam went through. Writing is a constant process of reaching beyond myself and grappling with the boundaries and barriers that get in the way.
8. Write a few sentences of your favorite pairing or character.
Since I’m totally unable to just pull a couple of lines from thin air, here’s a snippet from an unfinished story...
When he turned his head, Sam stood between a pair of old willows, one hand resting against the cracked grey bark. The sight struck Frodo like a blow to his breast - as though for a time he had lost his awareness of where Sam was. Now it rushed him with piercing surprise, clear and close in one breath. It was only when a deeper colouring brushed Sam's face that Frodo realised how long he had stared at him. But Sam did not glance aside, and neither did Frodo.
9. Are there any fan fiction trends/cliches you hate?
Um. I guess I’ll have to admit that nothing makes me bristle so much as a portrayal of Sam as sweet-but-dumb, and smotheringly protective of Frodo but clueless when it comes to the Ring and the Quest. Happily this isn’t at all a cliché in hobbit-centric stories, but it sometimes shows up in pieces that focus on Men or Elves. In these genres, hobbits in general are sometimes portrayed as childlike (if not childish), and Sam serves as the primary example to illustrate the point. IMO the movies have contributed to that impression (though it’s certainly not Sean Astin’s fault!), because many of the book-moments that show Sam’s wit and intuitions, his gift for poetry as well as his understanding of Frodo’s struggle with the Ring, were not taken up into the movies. But whatever the reason, I confess that if I come across a dense, silly Sam in a story, I’m likely to stop reading right there.
10. Are you guilty of any of the trends you hate?
I certainly hope not! If I ever ended up making Sam look dumb, I’d crawl off to hide in some dark corner for a very long time. ;)
11. What was the first fandom you wrote for? Do you still write for it?
Star Wars, mostly Han/Luke slash and some gen stories. I wrote obsessively in that fandom for about eight years (and I’m still very fond of it), but now I no longer do.
12. Name your OTPs and explain what it is about them you love to write.
Obviously, I can only name Frodo and Sam here. Now where to begin? Their bond is such a complex thing, and it has always been a source of inspiration, awe, excitement, curiosity and delight to me. What fascinates me the most is perhaps that their love transcends so many boundaries: in the process, they find and sustain a deep, abiding love that encompasses all the differences between them (from different social classes and backgrounds to distinct personalities, minds and perspectives). These differences aren’t obstacles, they enrich their bond and their experience of the world. Another aspect that speaks to me is that their love is based on friendship, trust and respect, and grows from there over many almost imperceptible stages until it embraces everything they are. (And I think this is true whether you see their relationship as romantic/erotic or not - that’s almost a minor point, really.) The equality they achieve, and the balance of two unique individuals (thrown into a unique situation) has always captured and moved me. Then there’s the fact that they achieve truly heroic feats and at the same time remain down-to-earth people - in one word: hobbits :) - with their obvious weaknesses beside their tremendous strengths. I could go on and on, but I hope this serves for a start. :)
13. What would you call your writing style?
I guess I can sidestep that difficult question by quoting readers’ opinions. My style is very frequently called lyrical, and I think that sums up its best qualities as well as its worst failings (though I realize that readers mean it as a compliment, and I appreciate that very much!). I’m very aware that my stories are usually full of images and descriptions that move beyond the factual, and I generally have to restrain myself not to overdo it. The reason why I do it, though, is that I want to convey the atmosphere of a world that differs very much from ours, and the moods, perceptions and emotions of characters who’ve been through extraordinary experiences. Conventional language with conventional meanings often can’t reach those places, so by playing with language and imagery, I hope to suggest a different time and place and experiences that differ profoundly from my own. I generally try not to pin anything down to a single, hard-and-fast meaning. At best, I think this can work to trigger readers’ imagination and act as a stepping-stone to new notions about the characters and their world. At worst, it seems overwrought and annoyingly vague, if not murky. There’s a thin line between opening up a space of imagination and leaving everything unclear and overly wordy. In hindsight, I feel that few stories of mine - if any - really manage to maintain the balance throughout, but I’m constantly working on improving it, at least.
14. Do you read other people's fan fiction? If so, what do you find yourself reading the most?
Due to lack of time, I generally read fanfic in sporadic bursts. Of course I mostly home in on hobbit stories (Frodo/Sam preferably :), but I also tremendously enjoy reading fics that approach LotR from different angles - for instance, stories adopting a non-slash view of the hobbits, or pieces that focus on the perspective of Men and Elves at any point in the history of Middle-earth. These different perspectives help me rethink my own understanding of Tolkien, not to mention that they often provide delightful discoveries.
15. Name one thing you'd love to write but have been too afraid or too shy to do.
Only one thing? Hah. By now I’m no longer shy about writing hobbit stories, but there’s still a lot in Middle-earth I’ll approach only with much dithering and trepidation. Elves (and everything connected with them, including the Undying Lands) are probably the most daunting to me... In many ways, they’re awe-inspiringly alien, from their experience of time to their specific forms of expression. I can totally feel with Frodo’s shocked amazement at the Council of Elrond, when he realizes that Elrond was part of the Last Alliance, thousands of years before! It’s definitely challenging to write Elves believably, without over-humanizing them or turning them into idealized but lifeless icons.
So much for what I find daunting. What makes me dizzy with apprehension is the notion of writing about the period immediately before Frodo left Middle-earth. Not only because the ultimate consequence - Frodo’s and Sam’s separation by the Havens - is still as heart-rending to me as it was when I first read LotR, but also because it must have been such an excruciatingly difficult time for them both. Frodo, I think, would never have left Sam and the Shire if he hadn’t felt an absolute need to do that, so that at some point his decision became inevitable. But what led to this point? His injuries clearly play a part, but it seems as if the book reveals only fractions of a long and painful process, and beside haunting memories, Frodo also seems to go through a transformation no one (including Frodo himself) fully understands. How did Frodo deal with it, and how did he come to terms with the notion of leaving? How much did Sam know or guess? What did it mean for their relationship? If I tried hard enough, I could possibly come up with a couple of fragmentary answers, but I think I’ll need much more time to reach anything approaching comprehension - if I ever do. And then, comprehension is one thing - emotionally, writing about this period is going to be at least as difficult, if I ever venture there.
16. Do you feel uncomfortable taking criticism? Or worse, do you have the dreaded bloated ego?
Ask my blessedly kind, insightful and patient beta-readers! Yeah, I know that’s a cop-out... so I’ll say that I have a fairly well-developed ego (hopefully not bloated though!) when it comes to my technical writing abilities. By now, I think I’m basically aware of my strengths and weaknesses as a writer, and I deeply appreciate beta-help. I’m always open to criticism, in fact I consider detailed constructive criticism an incredible gift - to know that someone else spent so much time and thought on something I’ve written really means a lot. Without it, I’d have to fall back on my own devices, to improve my writing and learn from my mistakes, and it’s a hell of a lot easier to do that with the assistance of a perceptive reader and an external perspective. My basic conviction is that there’s always room for improvement and that a writer can never look at her own story and hope for a completely neutral and objective perspective. So, criticism is a good thing, though I’d be a liar to say it never hurts. But as much as I trust my beta-readers, I don’t always take their advice and can get pretty stubborn about certain elements in a story that are fixed in my mind. Sometimes I’ll let such a thing go after long discussion, often I won’t. Still, those discussions are always tremendously helpful and I wouldn’t want to do without them. Criticism from readers, once a story has been posted, is also very welcome, but most of us probably don’t feel comfortable with criticizing fics in public, so it doesn’t happen all that often (unfortunately, IMO). I’m always ready to go back to a story I’d considered finished and work on it some more.
17. When you write, is there anything that helps?
Quiet, absence of time-constraints, and trees within view. :) When I’m stressed, I usually try to relax and shift my focus before I start to write - listening to music and reading something completely different helps a lot with that.
18. What inspires you?
That’s easy. (1) Trees. (No, seriously! :) I take long walks (or go for hikes when I can) to be out among trees, and there’s no better way for me to relax and find my inner balance. Best of all, it allows my mind to shut up, and I need that complete quiet to be able to write. So it’s usually when I’m outdoors, not thinking of anything at all, that the first notions of stories will suddenly come into my head. (2) Reading. While I’m reading books or fanfic I enjoy, I often find that descriptions or images will develop a life of their own within my mind and take me to a place where new ideas arise. (Music plays a part as well and works for in a very similar way for me.)
19. Lastly, how would you sum up your fan fiction experiences and you as a writer?
Sum up? Forget it. ;) I could never write a drabble, and I’m just as hopeless at summaries. Give me time and space to write an epic, then I might come up with something sensible. But okay, for what it’s worth, here’s the telegram version: my fanfiction experience is bliss - joy, ruptures, new discoveries, experimentation, constant challenges, all of that. I can’t tell how much of it is reflected in my writing, but hopefully some of it shows through.
20. Tag some friends, because they'll hate you for it.
Yup, that’s why I won’t do it. :) But I’d really love to see all my LJ friends who write stories answer these questions, as I’m curious to hear what their experience with writing about the hobbits and/or Middle-earth (or anything else) has been like. So, anyone who feels like it, please speak up!