Unattainable

[carnivalnights]

Because I don't believe in god necessarily (at best I would say I am agnostic) but sometimes think the universe somehow plays a role in what happens to us, somehow, sometimes I actually stop stressing for a moment thinking there's no way the universe would let any more bad happen to me. I think someone or something must know when enough is enough,

Comments

[dex]

The things keeping my situation decent are my partner, Naomi, and her having bought us a house, and mostly covering me with her income.

Oh yeah.. and not staying in contact with most of the rest of the human race. Basically, for the most part, opting out of humanity.

Not that I really recommend that.

[dex]

And hey. I rarely use chat any more but if you so wish, my old accounts are still the same .. if you google, dexotaku@gmail.com is where you can reach me. Not that I can help somehow, but I can talk. Sometimes.

[carnivalnights]

Thanks, Dex. <3 Glad to see you're still around. I miss our Yahoo chatting days! I don't think I use any chats now either. So sad. Everyone took off to Facebook. :( I have to agree with not communicating to most of the human race, unhealthy or not. I have two friends in my real life. That's honestly it. I'm glad you have your partner to keep you happy. Ive been single for a few years now. For the most part I want it that way but sometimes I miss it. Thanks also for your email. I should drop you a line sometime. I really do miss out chats. Mine is thingcalledlove@gmail.com.

[symptosis]

I see the hope you still manage to have while seeing the beauty in what may be fleeting moments. Now, if you could only hold on to those moments somehow; make them enough despite the hardships & obstacles that seem to overtake. Well, you're definitely thinking some intense thoughts about your place on this earth (even in the universe); that's for sure.

[carnivalnights]

Sometimes I don't even know how I am still standing or how I somehow still have those moments of hope or thinking things might get better. But as you said, it's about holding on to those moments. That is what I need to do. My brain just won't allow it, and sometimes I think neither will my heart. It's so battered and bruised, sometimes I wonder if it still works the way it's supposed to. Maybe one day I will find peace. In the meantime, thank you for still being here. <3