Hi!
So I have been toiling away at Senior Non-commissioned Officer (SNCO) Academy. I feel like I'm getting soooo behind on things. This week is a bad one, many many things all due at once. The load should lighten next week, and hopefully I can find some time to fic. I've done a little plotting on the novel, but not a whole lot.
Let me tell you, my ego has gotten bruised all to shit while I've been here. I am the #1 MSgt in my squadron (about 408 people, and 46ish MSgts) and I generally felt like I was a very sharp, professional SNCO. Well, everybody here is sharp and at the top, and I feel like the middle. : ( I know, it's a silly thing to be upset about. Oh, and I got a frickin' 71 on my 1st test. I NEVER score below 90s, and I got a 71... and I STUDIED. *sigh* Averages for the test were in the 70's, and the highest score in my class was a 90, but I still feel like a dirtbag.
To top it off, I fell when I went out for a run on Sunday and scraped the palm of my hand pretty deeply. (Yet another blow to the ego.) Lucky me, there's red streaks climbing up my arm from the wound site. I SO don't have time for an infection. Mom is a nurse, so I asked her if I should freak out and she told me to get to a doctor; I need antibiotics. *sigh* That means I have to miss class. I promised her I'd go, but maybe the streaks will be gone in the morning.
All and all, I miss my hubby and kiddo, I feel overworked, and overwhelmed and sad. I hate social situations. I'm simply not very good at them. I can't ever tell if somebody likes me or tolerates me, if I'm being annoying or if I am not being friendly enough. I seem to do well enough with guys, but I don't communicate on the same wavelegnth of most girls I think. I do great at work relationships because there are rules and expectations, etc... but this whole social thing stresses me out. I think I get read as completely different from what I am, most times. This is why I'm an introvert. I'm SO not a people person.
Gah, this turned into a proper rant. Sorry about that. Graduate on the 26th... not soon enough.
Let me tell you, my ego has gotten bruised all to shit while I've been here. I am the #1 MSgt in my squadron (about 408 people, and 46ish MSgts) and I generally felt like I was a very sharp, professional SNCO. Well, everybody here is sharp and at the top, and I feel like the middle. : ( I know, it's a silly thing to be upset about. Oh, and I got a frickin' 71 on my 1st test. I NEVER score below 90s, and I got a 71... and I STUDIED. *sigh* Averages for the test were in the 70's, and the highest score in my class was a 90, but I still feel like a dirtbag.
To top it off, I fell when I went out for a run on Sunday and scraped the palm of my hand pretty deeply. (Yet another blow to the ego.) Lucky me, there's red streaks climbing up my arm from the wound site. I SO don't have time for an infection. Mom is a nurse, so I asked her if I should freak out and she told me to get to a doctor; I need antibiotics. *sigh* That means I have to miss class. I promised her I'd go, but maybe the streaks will be gone in the morning.
All and all, I miss my hubby and kiddo, I feel overworked, and overwhelmed and sad. I hate social situations. I'm simply not very good at them. I can't ever tell if somebody likes me or tolerates me, if I'm being annoying or if I am not being friendly enough. I seem to do well enough with guys, but I don't communicate on the same wavelegnth of most girls I think. I do great at work relationships because there are rules and expectations, etc... but this whole social thing stresses me out. I think I get read as completely different from what I am, most times. This is why I'm an introvert. I'm SO not a people person.
Gah, this turned into a proper rant. Sorry about that. Graduate on the 26th... not soon enough.