When does it stop hurting? My bruises and marks have faded on the outside, but, on the inside, it still burns. I've started going to therapy, and I've been to a few sessions already. I can't piece everything together and there's a big part of me that feels . . . I don't know, abandoned? Is that the word I'm searching for? Lost? Left behind ( Read more... )

Orlando, Elijah, Sean and I have made it to Malta. At last. I do feel a little bad about falling asleep on Sean, though. After I offered to distract him and help him relax and everything. *sighs ( Read more... )

Have you ever gotten what you've most wanted and found that you're afraid to accept it? The other night, with Sean, everything started out so wonderfully. Dinner and almost making love . . . I just don't know why I stopped. I feel terrible about it, especially because I so want to be with Sean. Part of me expected him to be really upset with me. ( Read more... )

Got back from the set of "The Missing" to a message from Peter to come back to New Zealand. I haven't been back in a while and I'd love to go -- if only to see the rest of the cast again. I'm pretty lonely out here in Santa Fe. *sighs ( Read more... )