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This City Ain't the Same Without You
August. It is August and I find myself in Manila.
The rain woke me, sounding eerily like machine guns firing all over my neighborhood, a war raging outside my window. Everyday since August began, just like this. Then I realize how the year is almost over.
I had my heart strung out against two continents twice this year - the beginning of the year ( Read more... ) -
What I am learning
1. International event organizing
2. Grant proposal writing
3. Business plan making
4. Drum playing
5. Local government proposing
6. Sales strategizing
7. Deeper vision casting
8. Leading
9. Listening
10. Soon - pole dancing!
(just had to throw that in there. You didnt think I never had any fun, did you??)
Partial list only, but pretty representative so far.
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That day?
It's today. I am stalling as I write this. The room pitch black, my face illuminated by this laptop's screen.
It is also 3 am.
Here I go.
Not much has changed since I came home from the US, and yet so much also has. I haven't written in almost two months, a little strange for someone like me who needs the verbal outburst. There's just too much that ( Read more... ) -
The courage to stay.
You know how everything inside you tells you that its just about that time to walk away?
I've said so often that walking away is easy for me. It helped me avoid several crazy circumstances that wouldn't have done me any good. Yes we hear that life is short so live it up, but precisely my point. Life IS short and we don't need to add junk to it. It' ( Read more... ) -
The bible says to encourage each other daily.
Thank you for these words. Re-posting them because I need to see them often.
Encourage each other daily, using words of life because we need all the help we can get.
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You are a leader of leaders! You are a dreamer, but you are also an activator, which I think is awesome. When you put your mind to something, you go after it, and I always admired that ( Read more... ) -
Stumbling forward into beauty
There's something that's about to breakthrough inside me. I'm pretty sure I just have to sit here and let these feelings germinate. Patience with myself is key. And prayer.
I placed a phone call awhile ago to a friend of mine. I had felt God leading me to make that call and it turned out my friend was sitting in the secretary's office of Makati ( Read more... ) -
A very hard thing indeed
What is being asked of me is probably the most difficult, precarious thing I've had to do for someone.
I am being asked to stay, without guarantees, without real assurance of who I am and what I really mean, knowing fully well that there are complications to my being here under these tricky circumstances. So much of me tells me one day this will ( Read more... ) -
Keep your heart clean.
That's what my Blackberry Messenger status is.
B messaged me that she really liked it and I told her that it was a reminder to me, to keep my life simple. Entanglements happen easy and do not necessarily make for a quality life.
I think about what that means in the context of what I want in the future, and where I hope to be. I need to prepare for ( Read more... ) -
And do it all over again tomorrow.
I've been up since 6 am or so. I think I'd better start getting used to doing that. There just aren't enough hours minutes seconds in a day. I'll have to catch up on sleep somehow.
I had a conversation with him today. We hadn't spoken in a while, and I was starting to wonder if there was a bigger reason for the silence. I may be a ninja but I'm ( Read more... ) -
Need someone to love you right. (Part 2)
I remain steadfast because I believe in him, I believe he is worth the pain, and the risk of being left or told to move on.
My biggest fear has always been that time and again, I would be left.
Standing here now, in the immense probability that it will happen, I am telling that fear to come and get me because I won't back down.