House full of death ( Read more... )

Two years passed in the blink of an eye with the onset of the period of my life I will call post-butcher shop employment.  After inheriting the family home following my mother's death, a brief window of opportunity opened up like never before in my life and it seemed that with tragedy came also hope.   Time left its wake and that sense of hope ( Read more... )

I'm grateful I don't know how to play music or have rhythm.
If I did, I'd be a heroin addict and die from an overdose.
I'm content being an alcoholic writer who never writes.
Thank you.

I don't know

I don't have the words

Or dreams

Or fears

All the things

I thought I needed

I have

So what?

I want to curl up and die

But not really

So what?

Before allowing friends, girlfriends, or acquaintances to move into your house, carefully consider the following:

• Ultimately, no one gives a damn or has any respect.
• Appliances break.  It's on you, not them.
• People cannot be bothered to take their shoes off in the house.
• No one will ask before bringing people over, having parties, or entertaining ( Read more... )

The laundry hasn't been done in weeks ( Read more... )

Yesterday was my friend Joe's birthday.  A year ago, I would have probably said "my best friend Joe's birthday."  Typing friend even felt funny right now.  You get to these moments in life and you wonder how it happened.  People speak of Joe and my response is a negative one.  Bitterness and ugly feelings.  The urge to destroy and defame.  I'm ( Read more... )

Joyless days
A solemn gaze
Forgotten hope
An endless phase

A spark of luck
A dimwit fuck
Lost again
And feeling stuck

Empty heart
A failed fresh start
Life was good
Like phony art

Long time, no see.  Things are well.  I continue to work as a server and bartender at The Frog Tavern in lovely Syracuse, Indiana.  Years ago I never would have foreseen myself having a job that is so fun I can't believe I get paid to do it.  The entirety of my life now plays out in what is basically a quarter mile radius.  My job is just down the ( Read more... )

A year ago tomorrow, I awoke in the morning, my mind began to unravel, and I suffered a psychotic break from reality that lasted for about five days.  This year I am working for just over 24 consecutive hours.  Progress.  It's a bitch.

In 21 days, I will no longer work here.

These are my updates.