Resident Geek: Chapter Twelve
Title: Resident Geek
Genre: Romance/Humor
Pairings: Edward/Bella
Rating: NC-17
Chapter: 12/?
Warnings: Strong language, sexuality, and underage drinking.
Summary: Geeky Edward thinks he has absolutely no shot with the popular, beautiful Bella. Is he right, or will she be one of the many girls who thinks geeks make for better lovers? OOC-AH.
A/N: lejen01- thank you for questioning what I do. I need it. Love ya!
Annie - thanks for answering my insecure questions and pointing out things I never would have seen. You’re the best!
~*~*~
We are young
Heartache to heartache we stand
No promises no demands
Love is a battlefield.
We are strong
No one can tell us we're wrong
Searching our hearts for so long
Both of us knowing
Love is a battlefield.
~"Love Is A Battlefield" by Pat Benatar~
~*~*~
Chapter 12
EPOV
I opened my eyes to the birds singing, the sun shining, and... something was wrong with my boxers. Why were they...? I reached down under the covers to adjust them and encountered damp, sticky cotton. Oooh, that's why.
I must have been a little too active during my dream after erotic dream of Bella's soft, naked body writhing under mine last night. No bother. I slid the boxers off and threw them across the room in the direction of my dirty laundry pile.
There, I thought with a sigh of relief. Much better.
Now where was I...
Bella rested her cheek on her hand and stared at me. She was supposed to be studying. I could feel her eyes while I finished typing the java script required for my programming class on my laptop. Glancing at her underneath my eyelashes, I marveled at how truly beautiful she was. Natural beauty was rare and always breathtaking.
“Are you finished reading?” I asked, startling her out of her thoughts.
“What? Oh, no, I'm not. Just got distracted,” she replied, looking back down at her book as light pink streaked across her cheeks. Like I said, breathtaking. And now I was distracted.
Bella lifted her eyes to mine and smirked. “Are you finished typing?”
“Yes, actually I am,” I said, catching her off-guard.
“Really? What are you going to do now?” she asked, licking her bottom lip with the tip of her tongue. That small gesture shot straight down to my groin.
This was my fantasy, right? Didn't that mean I could do whatever I wanted?
Yes, I decided. It did.
Sweeping the computer off the table, I didn't even flinch as it hit the floor, though somewhere in the back of my mind I wondered if it was alright. But that didn't matter because this wasn’t real.
I climbed onto the table and pulled Bella into a rough kiss, sucking on that bottom lip that had teased me so with its glistening pink softness only seconds before. She moaned and pressed herself closer, but it wasn't enough. Gripping her hips, I lifted her up onto the table and then pushed her down until she was laid out beneath me.
“Is this table sturdy enough to hold us?” she asked breathlessly.
“I hope so,” I said wickedly.
She glanced nervously toward the hallway. “How do you know Ben won't come back soon?”
“Does it matter?” I shot back, leaning down to capture her lips once again. Kissing along her jawline, making my way to the sensitive spot behind her ear that always made her moan, I heard her sigh 'no,' even though the question had been rhetorical. As I nuzzled her throat and trailed open mouth kisses down to the curve of her collarbone, my hands made quick work of her blouse and bra.
I sat back on my heels and took my fill of Bella in a passionate, half-lidded state of desire. Her pale white skin glowed a little from the stark glare of the fluorescent lights overhead, which only highlighted her pink, beaded nipples. My eyes found those like beacons in the black darkness of night.
Bella squirmed under my scrutiny and raised her arms as if to cover herself in her shyness. I grabbed them firmly and shook my head at her. “Never hide yourself from me,” I demanded as I bent down and flicked one of her nipples with my tongue. She arched her back and moaned my name throatily. I smiled at her reaction, pleased that she was so willing and eager.
Letting go of her arms, I laid down beside her, holding myself up on one elbow and stretching out until my body touched the length of hers. Her hands fisted into my hair, dragging my head down for another searing kiss. My tongue was sucked into her mouth repeatedly in deep pulls until I found myself moving my lower body along with the steady rhythm, seeking the stimulation that would bring my release.
My free hand cupped one of her exposed breasts, kneading it while occasionally catching her taut nipple between my pointer and middle fingers and lightly tugging it. Bella gasped under me after I did it two more times and I removed my hand, rolling over her to rest my weight on my forearms so I hovered right above her chest. With a quick dip of my head, I fastened my mouth over her areola and pulled. Her back arched and she moaned, burying her hands in my hair again to hold me in place.
I lazily circled the tip of my tongue around her nipple until she whimpered with need, and then switched to her other breast, only to do the same thing. Bella's knees lifted under me, hitting my chest, and I held myself up so she could spread them. I settled down again into the cradle of her hips, which was my favorite place to be, and glanced up the line of her body, growing rock hard and throbbing when I saw Bella's eyes were full of desire and... love.
Enough with foreplay. I couldn't wait another second.
I quickly unsnapped the top button of her jeans and drew the zipper down as her hands slid under my shirt and bunched it up under my arms. Going up on my knees, I grabbed the collar of my shirt and roughly pulled it over my head, throwing it aside. Then I was back at Bella's waist, dragging her jeans and underwear down over her hips and legs. I got them off one leg and then the other, throwing them on the floor as well.
Bella gasped my name and gripped my shoulders, tugging me back to her mouth. I crawled up her naked body and hovered an inch above her lips. My hand slid over her jaw, around to the back of her neck. I plunged my fingers into her hair and pulled her up to meet my mouth in a slow, hot, and thorough kiss. Bella's hands fluttered down my back and then moved to the waist of my pants. She fumbled with the button and hurriedly unzipped my jeans before pushing them and my boxers down my hips. Then she used her feet to take them the rest of the way off.
I fought with getting them off completely and when they finally hit the ground below, Bella wrapped one of her hot, little hands around my pulsing erection and the world quickly narrowed to her ministrations. I groaned as she stroked me in quick movements, twisting her wrist when she neared the tip of my head.
It was too much, too fast. I needed to be in her, but I wouldn't last much longer if I let her keep this up.
“Stop,” I rasped, gripping her wrist and pulling her hand away. Bella pouted prettily, but then gasped as I spread her legs with my knees and positioned myself above her. God, I could feel the heat coming from her... it was all I could do not to plunge forward and just take her.
“Edward,” she whimpered, lifting her hips and seeking me out.
“What do you want, Bella?” I asked, staring deep into her eyes. She panted, her eyes unfocused, but she didn't answer so I tried again. “Do you want my cock inside you?”
Her eyelids fluttered wildly and she shakily nodded. “Yes,” she said in a strained voice.
That was all I needed to hear. With a grunt of satisfaction, I gripped her hips to hold her still as I drove forward and slid inside her in one firm thrust. Bella cried out, closing her eyes and throwing her head back.
And that's when I felt a sharp tug on my balls and came, hard, with one final stroke. I actually groaned, instead of just thinking about groaning, because I thought I could hold out longer. If that had been real, it would have been embarrassing to be so premature.
To be just another overly-excitable virgin.
I definitely needed to work on lasting longer because if the real thing happened, if Bella one day let me anywhere near her while she was naked or even partially unclothed, I doubted I would be able to stop myself from coming at the thought of feeling her wet heat around me. Much less actually doing it.
...well, that is if she didn't avoid me after my humiliating confession last night.
What had I been thinking?
Ugh, that's not the right question. I hadn't been thinking, which was part of the problem. The right question would be - Why had I said it out loud?
I flipped the covers off me, jammed my glasses on so I could see, and made my way to the bathroom, flipping on the light and automatically squinting until my eyes had adjusted to the brightness.
If I had just held it in, all of this would be inconsequential and I would be able to comfortably hang out with Bella again, without having to worry about scaring her off with anymore too soon, emotionally charged announcements from the inner workings of my mind.
Frustrated and completely disgusted with myself, I turned on the sink faucet and cleaned my stomach off with a hand towel.
If I called her right now, would she even pick up? Or would she pass me off to voice mail and then send me a text hours later about how she was 'busy' and would call me later?
I threw the towel on the ground when I was done and stared at myself in the mirror above the sink.
What if I lost her?
Would I be able to live with that? Or would I fight?
I gripped the sides of the sink countertop and leaned forward, glaring into my own eyes until they filled my vision.
I would fight, I decided. I would force her to acknowledge me. To at least let me have the chance to convince her that maybe she felt the same way because deep down I knew, even though it had only been a short time, she was important to me. I didn't know if I loved her, not really. I didn't know what love felt like, but I knew that she was my last thought before I fell asleep at night, and my first thought when I woke up the next morning.
Now I just need to get some clothes on, I thought, looking down at my very bare body. My eyes went to my deflated penis, red from overuse and still slightly chaffed from last night's events. Poor guy... No more dry humping sessions for you for a while…
Shower? I shifted my eyes sideways to the shower stall, but then looked ahead again.
No, no time! I was on a mission, a mission from God.
Alright, maybe not from God. Granted, this wasn’t a ‘find the holy grail’ or ‘get the band back together’ kind of mission, but it was imperative to me and that’s the only thing that mattered.
I sighed and rolled my head and shoulders around, stretching. Okay, game plan. I'm going to get dressed, purchase that damn $120 book for my 'Reasoning Methods in AI' class, and then call Bella and see what's what with her. And if she ignores my call, I'll just try again.
But if she ignores that one, I reasoned as I walked back into my room and headed for my dresser, I won't call a third time because three calls in a row is bordering on pathetic, and I want to avoid being pathetic and an idiot.
Game plan finalized, I opened the top drawer with a determined air about me and set to work.
~*~*~
BPOV
"I'm perplexed," I called out as a greeting, closing the door behind me without so much as a warning. I had just spent the last three hours pacing in my room, thankfully Alice-free because she had decided that she needed to spend the last day before classes began with the new 'love of her life'.
"Well, hello to you, too," Angela said flatly, one eyebrow arching in question at my total disregard of common courtesy in the way of knocking before entering a room unannounced. But she didn't know yet that my problem went beyond simple courtesy.
"Help," I whined, falling backwards across her bed next to where she was lounging.
"What's wrong now, B?"
I made a face at her nickname for me. "You know I hate it when you call me 'B'."
Angela just grinned. "I know, but I needed something to distract you so you could tell me why you barged into my room and then proceeded to make yourself at home on my comforter."
My eyes narrowed. "Fine," I said tersely. "Just don't let it happen again or I'm going to start calling you 'Angie'."
She made a face this time and I laughed, momentarily forgetting my worries.
"So what's up?" she asked, making them all crash back down on me.
I took a deep breath and launched into my tale of woe, telling her everything that had happened, but glossing over the more intimate details that had transpired between me and Edward. Just thinking about it again made me flush. I’d imagined something ‘intimate’ happening between me and Edward extensively in my fantasies and dreams, but the real thing was so much better than anything I could have imagined. If not for the after-delight confession, I would probably be over at his apartment right now, trying to coax him into bed.
When I got to the part after Edward had basically declared his love for me, Angela made me stop.
"Okay, I get it now," she simply said, leaning back against the wall and mound of pillows that helped prop her up.
"See why I'm perplexed now? I have no idea what to do," I sighed, glad to cast my problem unto someone else and just do whatever they told me to do.
"He definitely said 'think'?" She stressed the last word.
"Yes, just like the song by that ‘Partridge Family’ guy."
She looked off into the distance and I stared at her, trying to guess what she was thinking about. "How do you feel about him?" she finally asked.
"I... don't know. I like him. I, uh, God this is embarrassing to say, but I think he's the Clark to my Lois," I admitted in a hushed tone.
Angela just smirked a little and stared at me analytically. "But you don't think you love him?" she prodded.
"No," I said with a shake of my head. "Not yet, anyway."
"Okay, then it's simple. Don't do anything," she suggested with a shrug.
I sat up and gaped at her. "Don't do anything? That's your advice?"
"Sure. It wasn't an all out confession of undying love. Most likely it was just a side effect from... your ‘activity’. Just because you don't reciprocate his feelings doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. AND he seemed to take your silence in stride, not letting it get to him. I don't see why you actually have to do anything," she explained matter-of-factly.
Unbelievable.
Don't do anything...
I hadn't even realized that was an option.
I sat there, looking down at the bed without really seeing it, trying to wrap my mind around such a simple, yet amazing concept.
Don't do anything.
And she was right. It probably was a side effect from what we had done. Angela had made it seem like Edward never had a girlfriend before, so it probably stood to reason that he never fooled around with anyone either. Declarations made under those circumstances weren’t always true. I mean, I should know better than most people they weren’t true.
"I like it," I said, lifting my head to smile at my own Dr. Phil, only mine was much prettier and she gave way better advice.
She returned my smile. "I knew you would."
But then a thought struck me. “What if he brings it up?” I asked nervously, frowning.
“Well, in that case, you should talk to him about it.”
My frown turned into a grimace. Talking about feelings… hmph. Not exactly my forte, but I could do it. If push came to shove and Edward brought last night up, I could talk to him.
"Thanks, Angela. You really saved me from stressing out about this and losing more sleep than I need to the night before classes start."
"Don't worry about it," she replied. I stood up and made a move to leave when she said something else, something that chilled me to the bone.
"You really should tell him." We both knew what she was referring to.
I shook my head. "No, I can't. It happened and I dealt with it. I don't see why I need to drudge up the past."
"Bella," she sighed, exasperated because we had been through this so many times before. "I think it would be good for you to talk about it. Besides, he has a right to know."
Has a right? No one had that right, not until I said so.
"Not yet he doesn't," I said firmly, walking out of her room before she could respond.
~*~*~
I was printing out my class schedule later that afternoon when my phone rang, vibrating and wriggling on top of my desk. I glanced at the caller ID screen and bit my lip in indecision.
Edward
I had to answer. It was like peeling off a band-aid, the quicker I got it over with, the better it would be. Sighing, I punched the ‘accept’ button and held the phone up to my ear. “Hello?”
“Bella?” he questioned unnecessarily. Of course it was me. Who else would be answering my phone? “Hey,” he said, his tone brightening.
“Hey, Edward. What’s up?” I glanced down at my desk and drummed my nails of my free hand against the fake wood, working off some of the nervousness humming throughout my body.
Don’t bring up last night, don’t bring up last night, don’t bring up last night…
“Nothing.” I could hear the shrug in his voice. “What are you doing?”
“Getting ready for tomorrow.”
“Oh, right… I never asked what classes you’re taking this semester,” he hinted, giving me a great opening for a safe, neutral conversation. I gladly took it and we talked about our classes and how the first day was always nerve-racking because you never really knew how your professors would act, but how it was also great because there was a 99 percent chance you would get out early and without homework for next time.
From there, we discussed what we had going on this week and I off-handedly mentioned the KD ‘Back to School’ party taking place Friday night.
“Sounds like it’ll be fun,” he said earnestly.
“Do you want to go?” I asked after a second of silence. He hesitated and I smiled, adding, “With me. Do you want to go with me?”
“Yeah… I could do that.” He sounded so conflicted and nervous, but was trying to play it cool. I had to grin, imagining how cute he looked right now with his forehead scrunched up, running one of his hands through his hair.
“Cool,” I said, matching his casual tone. Looking at the clock on the wall, I sighed, “Well, I should probably get some dinner. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay, Bella. Good night.”
“Night, Edward.”
We hung up and I set my phone down gingerly on my desk. That hadn’t been so hard. This ‘doing nothing’ thing was going to work, it seemed.
Thank you, Angela. I silently sent that up to wherever silent ‘thank you’s go and stood up, grabbing the schedule print out off my printer.
Ugh. School, I thought with disgust, looking at the early morning class I had tomorrow. I hated waking up early.
~*~*~
A/N: Defs/Refs -
‘Mission from God’ - from The Blues Brothers, which is one of the boyfriend’s favorite movies. I’ve had to sit through it more times than I’ve ever wanted to see Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi sing the blues, which would be zero. I’ve wanted to see them sing the blues zero times, but I love the boyfriend so I watched the stupid movie…more than once. ::grumble, grumble::
‘Find the holy grail’ - obviously a reference to Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Duh.
Angela referring to Bella as ‘B’ - got that from ‘Gossip Girl’, which is my soap opera-y drama indulgence show. It comes on the CW and is based (loosely, I’m guessing) on the lives of upper-east side (New York City) rich kids. Sometimes I wish the girl who played Serena had been cast as Rosalie. She would have been perfect for that role. (And I've been told Faith called Buffy that a lot in BtVS.)
The Partridge Family - a ‘70s television show about this family with the last name of Partridge who traveled around and played in a band together. I’ve never actually watched an episode of this show, but I watched the TV movie about what happened behind the scenes, so I’m fairly confident in my knowledge of it. (Hah!) The guy I refer to is David Cassidy, who had an actual singing career apart from the show. His one big hit and probably the only song I know he sang was ‘I Think I Love You’.
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Genre: Romance/Humor
Pairings: Edward/Bella
Rating: NC-17
Chapter: 12/?
Warnings: Strong language, sexuality, and underage drinking.
Summary: Geeky Edward thinks he has absolutely no shot with the popular, beautiful Bella. Is he right, or will she be one of the many girls who thinks geeks make for better lovers? OOC-AH.
A/N: lejen01- thank you for questioning what I do. I need it. Love ya!
Annie - thanks for answering my insecure questions and pointing out things I never would have seen. You’re the best!
~*~*~
We are young
Heartache to heartache we stand
No promises no demands
Love is a battlefield.
We are strong
No one can tell us we're wrong
Searching our hearts for so long
Both of us knowing
Love is a battlefield.
~"Love Is A Battlefield" by Pat Benatar~
~*~*~
Chapter 12
EPOV
I opened my eyes to the birds singing, the sun shining, and... something was wrong with my boxers. Why were they...? I reached down under the covers to adjust them and encountered damp, sticky cotton. Oooh, that's why.
I must have been a little too active during my dream after erotic dream of Bella's soft, naked body writhing under mine last night. No bother. I slid the boxers off and threw them across the room in the direction of my dirty laundry pile.
There, I thought with a sigh of relief. Much better.
Now where was I...
Bella rested her cheek on her hand and stared at me. She was supposed to be studying. I could feel her eyes while I finished typing the java script required for my programming class on my laptop. Glancing at her underneath my eyelashes, I marveled at how truly beautiful she was. Natural beauty was rare and always breathtaking.
“Are you finished reading?” I asked, startling her out of her thoughts.
“What? Oh, no, I'm not. Just got distracted,” she replied, looking back down at her book as light pink streaked across her cheeks. Like I said, breathtaking. And now I was distracted.
Bella lifted her eyes to mine and smirked. “Are you finished typing?”
“Yes, actually I am,” I said, catching her off-guard.
“Really? What are you going to do now?” she asked, licking her bottom lip with the tip of her tongue. That small gesture shot straight down to my groin.
This was my fantasy, right? Didn't that mean I could do whatever I wanted?
Yes, I decided. It did.
Sweeping the computer off the table, I didn't even flinch as it hit the floor, though somewhere in the back of my mind I wondered if it was alright. But that didn't matter because this wasn’t real.
I climbed onto the table and pulled Bella into a rough kiss, sucking on that bottom lip that had teased me so with its glistening pink softness only seconds before. She moaned and pressed herself closer, but it wasn't enough. Gripping her hips, I lifted her up onto the table and then pushed her down until she was laid out beneath me.
“Is this table sturdy enough to hold us?” she asked breathlessly.
“I hope so,” I said wickedly.
She glanced nervously toward the hallway. “How do you know Ben won't come back soon?”
“Does it matter?” I shot back, leaning down to capture her lips once again. Kissing along her jawline, making my way to the sensitive spot behind her ear that always made her moan, I heard her sigh 'no,' even though the question had been rhetorical. As I nuzzled her throat and trailed open mouth kisses down to the curve of her collarbone, my hands made quick work of her blouse and bra.
I sat back on my heels and took my fill of Bella in a passionate, half-lidded state of desire. Her pale white skin glowed a little from the stark glare of the fluorescent lights overhead, which only highlighted her pink, beaded nipples. My eyes found those like beacons in the black darkness of night.
Bella squirmed under my scrutiny and raised her arms as if to cover herself in her shyness. I grabbed them firmly and shook my head at her. “Never hide yourself from me,” I demanded as I bent down and flicked one of her nipples with my tongue. She arched her back and moaned my name throatily. I smiled at her reaction, pleased that she was so willing and eager.
Letting go of her arms, I laid down beside her, holding myself up on one elbow and stretching out until my body touched the length of hers. Her hands fisted into my hair, dragging my head down for another searing kiss. My tongue was sucked into her mouth repeatedly in deep pulls until I found myself moving my lower body along with the steady rhythm, seeking the stimulation that would bring my release.
My free hand cupped one of her exposed breasts, kneading it while occasionally catching her taut nipple between my pointer and middle fingers and lightly tugging it. Bella gasped under me after I did it two more times and I removed my hand, rolling over her to rest my weight on my forearms so I hovered right above her chest. With a quick dip of my head, I fastened my mouth over her areola and pulled. Her back arched and she moaned, burying her hands in my hair again to hold me in place.
I lazily circled the tip of my tongue around her nipple until she whimpered with need, and then switched to her other breast, only to do the same thing. Bella's knees lifted under me, hitting my chest, and I held myself up so she could spread them. I settled down again into the cradle of her hips, which was my favorite place to be, and glanced up the line of her body, growing rock hard and throbbing when I saw Bella's eyes were full of desire and... love.
Enough with foreplay. I couldn't wait another second.
I quickly unsnapped the top button of her jeans and drew the zipper down as her hands slid under my shirt and bunched it up under my arms. Going up on my knees, I grabbed the collar of my shirt and roughly pulled it over my head, throwing it aside. Then I was back at Bella's waist, dragging her jeans and underwear down over her hips and legs. I got them off one leg and then the other, throwing them on the floor as well.
Bella gasped my name and gripped my shoulders, tugging me back to her mouth. I crawled up her naked body and hovered an inch above her lips. My hand slid over her jaw, around to the back of her neck. I plunged my fingers into her hair and pulled her up to meet my mouth in a slow, hot, and thorough kiss. Bella's hands fluttered down my back and then moved to the waist of my pants. She fumbled with the button and hurriedly unzipped my jeans before pushing them and my boxers down my hips. Then she used her feet to take them the rest of the way off.
I fought with getting them off completely and when they finally hit the ground below, Bella wrapped one of her hot, little hands around my pulsing erection and the world quickly narrowed to her ministrations. I groaned as she stroked me in quick movements, twisting her wrist when she neared the tip of my head.
It was too much, too fast. I needed to be in her, but I wouldn't last much longer if I let her keep this up.
“Stop,” I rasped, gripping her wrist and pulling her hand away. Bella pouted prettily, but then gasped as I spread her legs with my knees and positioned myself above her. God, I could feel the heat coming from her... it was all I could do not to plunge forward and just take her.
“Edward,” she whimpered, lifting her hips and seeking me out.
“What do you want, Bella?” I asked, staring deep into her eyes. She panted, her eyes unfocused, but she didn't answer so I tried again. “Do you want my cock inside you?”
Her eyelids fluttered wildly and she shakily nodded. “Yes,” she said in a strained voice.
That was all I needed to hear. With a grunt of satisfaction, I gripped her hips to hold her still as I drove forward and slid inside her in one firm thrust. Bella cried out, closing her eyes and throwing her head back.
And that's when I felt a sharp tug on my balls and came, hard, with one final stroke. I actually groaned, instead of just thinking about groaning, because I thought I could hold out longer. If that had been real, it would have been embarrassing to be so premature.
To be just another overly-excitable virgin.
I definitely needed to work on lasting longer because if the real thing happened, if Bella one day let me anywhere near her while she was naked or even partially unclothed, I doubted I would be able to stop myself from coming at the thought of feeling her wet heat around me. Much less actually doing it.
...well, that is if she didn't avoid me after my humiliating confession last night.
What had I been thinking?
Ugh, that's not the right question. I hadn't been thinking, which was part of the problem. The right question would be - Why had I said it out loud?
I flipped the covers off me, jammed my glasses on so I could see, and made my way to the bathroom, flipping on the light and automatically squinting until my eyes had adjusted to the brightness.
If I had just held it in, all of this would be inconsequential and I would be able to comfortably hang out with Bella again, without having to worry about scaring her off with anymore too soon, emotionally charged announcements from the inner workings of my mind.
Frustrated and completely disgusted with myself, I turned on the sink faucet and cleaned my stomach off with a hand towel.
If I called her right now, would she even pick up? Or would she pass me off to voice mail and then send me a text hours later about how she was 'busy' and would call me later?
I threw the towel on the ground when I was done and stared at myself in the mirror above the sink.
What if I lost her?
Would I be able to live with that? Or would I fight?
I gripped the sides of the sink countertop and leaned forward, glaring into my own eyes until they filled my vision.
I would fight, I decided. I would force her to acknowledge me. To at least let me have the chance to convince her that maybe she felt the same way because deep down I knew, even though it had only been a short time, she was important to me. I didn't know if I loved her, not really. I didn't know what love felt like, but I knew that she was my last thought before I fell asleep at night, and my first thought when I woke up the next morning.
Now I just need to get some clothes on, I thought, looking down at my very bare body. My eyes went to my deflated penis, red from overuse and still slightly chaffed from last night's events. Poor guy... No more dry humping sessions for you for a while…
Shower? I shifted my eyes sideways to the shower stall, but then looked ahead again.
No, no time! I was on a mission, a mission from God.
Alright, maybe not from God. Granted, this wasn’t a ‘find the holy grail’ or ‘get the band back together’ kind of mission, but it was imperative to me and that’s the only thing that mattered.
I sighed and rolled my head and shoulders around, stretching. Okay, game plan. I'm going to get dressed, purchase that damn $120 book for my 'Reasoning Methods in AI' class, and then call Bella and see what's what with her. And if she ignores my call, I'll just try again.
But if she ignores that one, I reasoned as I walked back into my room and headed for my dresser, I won't call a third time because three calls in a row is bordering on pathetic, and I want to avoid being pathetic and an idiot.
Game plan finalized, I opened the top drawer with a determined air about me and set to work.
~*~*~
BPOV
"I'm perplexed," I called out as a greeting, closing the door behind me without so much as a warning. I had just spent the last three hours pacing in my room, thankfully Alice-free because she had decided that she needed to spend the last day before classes began with the new 'love of her life'.
"Well, hello to you, too," Angela said flatly, one eyebrow arching in question at my total disregard of common courtesy in the way of knocking before entering a room unannounced. But she didn't know yet that my problem went beyond simple courtesy.
"Help," I whined, falling backwards across her bed next to where she was lounging.
"What's wrong now, B?"
I made a face at her nickname for me. "You know I hate it when you call me 'B'."
Angela just grinned. "I know, but I needed something to distract you so you could tell me why you barged into my room and then proceeded to make yourself at home on my comforter."
My eyes narrowed. "Fine," I said tersely. "Just don't let it happen again or I'm going to start calling you 'Angie'."
She made a face this time and I laughed, momentarily forgetting my worries.
"So what's up?" she asked, making them all crash back down on me.
I took a deep breath and launched into my tale of woe, telling her everything that had happened, but glossing over the more intimate details that had transpired between me and Edward. Just thinking about it again made me flush. I’d imagined something ‘intimate’ happening between me and Edward extensively in my fantasies and dreams, but the real thing was so much better than anything I could have imagined. If not for the after-delight confession, I would probably be over at his apartment right now, trying to coax him into bed.
When I got to the part after Edward had basically declared his love for me, Angela made me stop.
"Okay, I get it now," she simply said, leaning back against the wall and mound of pillows that helped prop her up.
"See why I'm perplexed now? I have no idea what to do," I sighed, glad to cast my problem unto someone else and just do whatever they told me to do.
"He definitely said 'think'?" She stressed the last word.
"Yes, just like the song by that ‘Partridge Family’ guy."
She looked off into the distance and I stared at her, trying to guess what she was thinking about. "How do you feel about him?" she finally asked.
"I... don't know. I like him. I, uh, God this is embarrassing to say, but I think he's the Clark to my Lois," I admitted in a hushed tone.
Angela just smirked a little and stared at me analytically. "But you don't think you love him?" she prodded.
"No," I said with a shake of my head. "Not yet, anyway."
"Okay, then it's simple. Don't do anything," she suggested with a shrug.
I sat up and gaped at her. "Don't do anything? That's your advice?"
"Sure. It wasn't an all out confession of undying love. Most likely it was just a side effect from... your ‘activity’. Just because you don't reciprocate his feelings doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. AND he seemed to take your silence in stride, not letting it get to him. I don't see why you actually have to do anything," she explained matter-of-factly.
Unbelievable.
Don't do anything...
I hadn't even realized that was an option.
I sat there, looking down at the bed without really seeing it, trying to wrap my mind around such a simple, yet amazing concept.
Don't do anything.
And she was right. It probably was a side effect from what we had done. Angela had made it seem like Edward never had a girlfriend before, so it probably stood to reason that he never fooled around with anyone either. Declarations made under those circumstances weren’t always true. I mean, I should know better than most people they weren’t true.
"I like it," I said, lifting my head to smile at my own Dr. Phil, only mine was much prettier and she gave way better advice.
She returned my smile. "I knew you would."
But then a thought struck me. “What if he brings it up?” I asked nervously, frowning.
“Well, in that case, you should talk to him about it.”
My frown turned into a grimace. Talking about feelings… hmph. Not exactly my forte, but I could do it. If push came to shove and Edward brought last night up, I could talk to him.
"Thanks, Angela. You really saved me from stressing out about this and losing more sleep than I need to the night before classes start."
"Don't worry about it," she replied. I stood up and made a move to leave when she said something else, something that chilled me to the bone.
"You really should tell him." We both knew what she was referring to.
I shook my head. "No, I can't. It happened and I dealt with it. I don't see why I need to drudge up the past."
"Bella," she sighed, exasperated because we had been through this so many times before. "I think it would be good for you to talk about it. Besides, he has a right to know."
Has a right? No one had that right, not until I said so.
"Not yet he doesn't," I said firmly, walking out of her room before she could respond.
~*~*~
I was printing out my class schedule later that afternoon when my phone rang, vibrating and wriggling on top of my desk. I glanced at the caller ID screen and bit my lip in indecision.
Edward
I had to answer. It was like peeling off a band-aid, the quicker I got it over with, the better it would be. Sighing, I punched the ‘accept’ button and held the phone up to my ear. “Hello?”
“Bella?” he questioned unnecessarily. Of course it was me. Who else would be answering my phone? “Hey,” he said, his tone brightening.
“Hey, Edward. What’s up?” I glanced down at my desk and drummed my nails of my free hand against the fake wood, working off some of the nervousness humming throughout my body.
Don’t bring up last night, don’t bring up last night, don’t bring up last night…
“Nothing.” I could hear the shrug in his voice. “What are you doing?”
“Getting ready for tomorrow.”
“Oh, right… I never asked what classes you’re taking this semester,” he hinted, giving me a great opening for a safe, neutral conversation. I gladly took it and we talked about our classes and how the first day was always nerve-racking because you never really knew how your professors would act, but how it was also great because there was a 99 percent chance you would get out early and without homework for next time.
From there, we discussed what we had going on this week and I off-handedly mentioned the KD ‘Back to School’ party taking place Friday night.
“Sounds like it’ll be fun,” he said earnestly.
“Do you want to go?” I asked after a second of silence. He hesitated and I smiled, adding, “With me. Do you want to go with me?”
“Yeah… I could do that.” He sounded so conflicted and nervous, but was trying to play it cool. I had to grin, imagining how cute he looked right now with his forehead scrunched up, running one of his hands through his hair.
“Cool,” I said, matching his casual tone. Looking at the clock on the wall, I sighed, “Well, I should probably get some dinner. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay, Bella. Good night.”
“Night, Edward.”
We hung up and I set my phone down gingerly on my desk. That hadn’t been so hard. This ‘doing nothing’ thing was going to work, it seemed.
Thank you, Angela. I silently sent that up to wherever silent ‘thank you’s go and stood up, grabbing the schedule print out off my printer.
Ugh. School, I thought with disgust, looking at the early morning class I had tomorrow. I hated waking up early.
~*~*~
A/N: Defs/Refs -
‘Mission from God’ - from The Blues Brothers, which is one of the boyfriend’s favorite movies. I’ve had to sit through it more times than I’ve ever wanted to see Dan Aykroyd and John Belushi sing the blues, which would be zero. I’ve wanted to see them sing the blues zero times, but I love the boyfriend so I watched the stupid movie…more than once. ::grumble, grumble::
‘Find the holy grail’ - obviously a reference to Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Duh.
Angela referring to Bella as ‘B’ - got that from ‘Gossip Girl’, which is my soap opera-y drama indulgence show. It comes on the CW and is based (loosely, I’m guessing) on the lives of upper-east side (New York City) rich kids. Sometimes I wish the girl who played Serena had been cast as Rosalie. She would have been perfect for that role. (And I've been told Faith called Buffy that a lot in BtVS.)
The Partridge Family - a ‘70s television show about this family with the last name of Partridge who traveled around and played in a band together. I’ve never actually watched an episode of this show, but I watched the TV movie about what happened behind the scenes, so I’m fairly confident in my knowledge of it. (Hah!) The guy I refer to is David Cassidy, who had an actual singing career apart from the show. His one big hit and probably the only song I know he sang was ‘I Think I Love You’.
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