Random Helping #158: New Look
So! I decided to give my Livejournal a bit of a makeover; going for a more personalised style considering that I've practically graduated from being a fangirl these days. Gotta say, I'm actually pretty pleased with the revamp. Heh.
I took a medical leave today because I woke up with a splitting headache and I knew there was no way I would be able to stand properly without swaying like a drunkard. And I also knew that with another couple of hours of nap, the headache would eventually let up but because there's no way I would be able to have a peaceful nap at the office, hence the decision to take the day off from work and rest at home.
My mother was especially worried, thinking that the medicinal spray she squirted on my dandruff-laden scalp last night was the culprit. I giggled and told her that that wasn't it. She stood at my door, expecting an answer. Thing is, I knew the exact cause behind my splitting headache and it wasn't due to the medicinal hairspray; nor the green apples I've been consuming as of late; according to my mother.
The reason behind my splitting headache was fairly and humourously simple: I cried too much yesterday. The exact reason for my waterworks? Now, that wasn't something I could tell my mother easily. I told her that I cried too much because I was watching some videos from The Daily Reminder channel on YouTube. It wasn't completely a lie; I did cry yesterday after listening to some of Mufti Ismail Menk's lectures on dealing with trials and tribulations. I cried a lot. But the major reason for my waterworks was none other than *cue drumroll* him. Yes, him. The same guy who rejected me a day after his birthday.
*sighs* But let's not get into that.
Aku sebenarnya dah bosan asyik tulis pasal mamat tu. Diari aku tahun lepas pun penuh pasal dia sampai aku sendiri naik muak nak baca sampai habis. Part yang awal-awal tu ok lagi la sebab banyak kenangan manis tapi bila tiba nak penghujungnya, semua benda aku tulis pasal dia semuanya sendu belaka. Aku dah bosan. So sekarang, aku nak sembang pasal benda lain.
This morning, after I woke up from a brief nap after Fajr, I checked my Facebook for any interesting articles; something I'd usually do when I don't have anything better to do. And I wasn't disappointed. I noticed that a good friend of mine, Atiqah, posted this really inspiring article on recharging one's Iman and by the time I was finished, I was reduced to tears, snot and a stuffed nose.
I was impressed. I was moved. Upon finishing the article, I wondered to myself, "What did I do to deserve such an amazing friend?" Aku terus teringat kat satu ayat ni yang aku sendiri tak ingat siapa yang cakap: "Allah hantar seseorang dalam hidup kita, ada sebabnya." Aku jadi sebak. Aku tak sangka orang yang aku kenal in less than a year banyak mengubah hidup aku dan bantu aku untuk bangkit semula. Bukan nak cakap yang aku takde orang lain yang tolong aku, huish, adaaaa. And Alhamdulillah, ramai. Tapi apa yang buat aku terharu sebenarnya is the fact that I only knew her mid of 2015 and she has taught me a lot of things; particularly in finding my way back to Allah.
Honestly, aku rasa memang sangat down pagi tadi, lagi-lagi bila bangun pagi dengan sakit kepala yang mencanak-canak. Tu tak masuk lagi dengan emosi aku yang memang sangat kacau dan serabut. I felt spiritually inspired lepas baca post tu. And I spent my whole day pouring my tears and heart out to Allah. I cried and cried and cried. Aku duduk termenung atas sejadah lepas solat Dhuha. Aku tak tau macam mana nak mulakan sebab dalam kepala aku memang rasa serabut sangat-sangat. But once I did, the tears couldn't seem to stop. Dan Alhamdulillah, as I'm writing this post, aku rasa tenang. Seolah-olah benda yang aku serabutkan sangat pagi tadi tu takde menda sebenarnya. Dan aku harap sangat-sangat yang ketenangan ni berterusan.
Aku teringin nak tulis inspiring articles macam Atiqah. Macam Muharikah. Macam Encik Sederhana/Penulis Misteri. Macam Hikmatul Islam. But I could only write so much and when I do, they tend to be rambly and nonsensical most of the times. I'm too embarrassed to even share my pieces because I feel that they're not that worthy of an audience.
But I honestly do hope that one day, I would be able to write pieces that would inspire others to do good. Or at least, do something useful with the skills that I have.
Insha-Allah.
I took a medical leave today because I woke up with a splitting headache and I knew there was no way I would be able to stand properly without swaying like a drunkard. And I also knew that with another couple of hours of nap, the headache would eventually let up but because there's no way I would be able to have a peaceful nap at the office, hence the decision to take the day off from work and rest at home.
My mother was especially worried, thinking that the medicinal spray she squirted on my dandruff-laden scalp last night was the culprit. I giggled and told her that that wasn't it. She stood at my door, expecting an answer. Thing is, I knew the exact cause behind my splitting headache and it wasn't due to the medicinal hairspray; nor the green apples I've been consuming as of late; according to my mother.
The reason behind my splitting headache was fairly and humourously simple: I cried too much yesterday. The exact reason for my waterworks? Now, that wasn't something I could tell my mother easily. I told her that I cried too much because I was watching some videos from The Daily Reminder channel on YouTube. It wasn't completely a lie; I did cry yesterday after listening to some of Mufti Ismail Menk's lectures on dealing with trials and tribulations. I cried a lot. But the major reason for my waterworks was none other than *cue drumroll* him. Yes, him. The same guy who rejected me a day after his birthday.
*sighs* But let's not get into that.
Aku sebenarnya dah bosan asyik tulis pasal mamat tu. Diari aku tahun lepas pun penuh pasal dia sampai aku sendiri naik muak nak baca sampai habis. Part yang awal-awal tu ok lagi la sebab banyak kenangan manis tapi bila tiba nak penghujungnya, semua benda aku tulis pasal dia semuanya sendu belaka. Aku dah bosan. So sekarang, aku nak sembang pasal benda lain.
This morning, after I woke up from a brief nap after Fajr, I checked my Facebook for any interesting articles; something I'd usually do when I don't have anything better to do. And I wasn't disappointed. I noticed that a good friend of mine, Atiqah, posted this really inspiring article on recharging one's Iman and by the time I was finished, I was reduced to tears, snot and a stuffed nose.
I was impressed. I was moved. Upon finishing the article, I wondered to myself, "What did I do to deserve such an amazing friend?" Aku terus teringat kat satu ayat ni yang aku sendiri tak ingat siapa yang cakap: "Allah hantar seseorang dalam hidup kita, ada sebabnya." Aku jadi sebak. Aku tak sangka orang yang aku kenal in less than a year banyak mengubah hidup aku dan bantu aku untuk bangkit semula. Bukan nak cakap yang aku takde orang lain yang tolong aku, huish, adaaaa. And Alhamdulillah, ramai. Tapi apa yang buat aku terharu sebenarnya is the fact that I only knew her mid of 2015 and she has taught me a lot of things; particularly in finding my way back to Allah.
Honestly, aku rasa memang sangat down pagi tadi, lagi-lagi bila bangun pagi dengan sakit kepala yang mencanak-canak. Tu tak masuk lagi dengan emosi aku yang memang sangat kacau dan serabut. I felt spiritually inspired lepas baca post tu. And I spent my whole day pouring my tears and heart out to Allah. I cried and cried and cried. Aku duduk termenung atas sejadah lepas solat Dhuha. Aku tak tau macam mana nak mulakan sebab dalam kepala aku memang rasa serabut sangat-sangat. But once I did, the tears couldn't seem to stop. Dan Alhamdulillah, as I'm writing this post, aku rasa tenang. Seolah-olah benda yang aku serabutkan sangat pagi tadi tu takde menda sebenarnya. Dan aku harap sangat-sangat yang ketenangan ni berterusan.
Aku teringin nak tulis inspiring articles macam Atiqah. Macam Muharikah. Macam Encik Sederhana/Penulis Misteri. Macam Hikmatul Islam. But I could only write so much and when I do, they tend to be rambly and nonsensical most of the times. I'm too embarrassed to even share my pieces because I feel that they're not that worthy of an audience.
But I honestly do hope that one day, I would be able to write pieces that would inspire others to do good. Or at least, do something useful with the skills that I have.
Insha-Allah.