The Legacy // How I Got Zuki

[charmedothfan]

Before I edit this and cut it down to 300 words or less, I want to post it. :D This is my grammar essay on a public servant who showed simplicity/joyful detachment. :D

The Legacy

She entered the doctor’s office with a cough, cold and a headache expecting to get some sort of diagnosis along with antibiotics for her sickness. Who knew

Comments

[hyperwriter2794]

Aw, that`s so sweet. It`s giving me cavities. :"> Stradivarius. @-) *gets nosebleed*

[ladeefrikkinda]

Awwwwww dude. Really nice

[chezzu]

LOVE IT. Love love love.
If I write one on Phoenix Wright, will he kill me? ;;)

Nah.
No seriously I love this. It's so moving. :)
There were some sentences that were constructed weirdly though but overall, great job!

like:

Perhaps one day she would even pass Zuki on to another young musician that they too may learn.

basta it kinda sounds weird. :)) maybe a few commas and a "so" between musician and that?

idk. :D like i said, it's already a great composition. ily love!

[charmedothfan]

Thanks for the comments. :D I'll edit it another day though. :P Hard to cut it down... Plus, I haven't asked if this type of essay is allowed.

[plu_squared]

That was really nice. :)

[charmedothfan]

WOOT! I showed it to sir and he said I didn't have to cut it down. 8D I'll just do some editing then. :D