Must Love Girls [Part Three]
Title: Must Love Girls [Part Three]
Pairing(s): TaengSic
Rating/Genre: PG-13; Girl-Meets-Dog-And-Girl
Disclaimer: I don't own Soshi. I don't own anyone, in fact. All Fiction.
Chap. Summary: Jessica tiptoes the line between flirting and respecting Taeyeon’s reluctance.
Author's Notes: Speaking of Pokémon and Korea, who’s seen The Deflating Pikachu Tackle-Rama?!!! Haahahha omggg our world is so random.
✽ ✽ ✽
“Why couldn’t you find me actual girlfriend material, canine!?”
As expected, Lennon returned Jessica’s question with a weak whimper and a butt shake. His conveniently useless contribution at 5pm that next Thursday.
Jessica spritzed her neck, faintly (severely) worrying what brand of freaking perfume gave her that rosy aroma. Honestly, she couldn’t recall any of her floral fragrances being rose-based. Taeyeon must’ve sucked with smell-recognition.
Which was bloody cute.
Ugh, why the fuck did Jessica’s pickiness take a nosedive?
Her diatribe filled the apartment. “You’re selfish, you know that, Lens? Instead of attracting-oh, I don’t know-a woman my own damn age who can make adult conversation, you bring me Kim Taeyeon. Kim Taeyeon!” She shooed him from her rage path to the bedroom closet. “Odd, dog-obsessed Taeyeon with her filthy canvas sneakers and...”
Taeyeon’s bashful smile. Her micro-expressions. Those wisps of gronde hair escaping her ponytail.
Her humility, unpretentious intelligence, her multitude of layers-like an over-foiled Cadbury Egg or a Photoshop document.
Not-so-eloquent similes withstanding, Jessica Jung fell victim to the irrational lure of destiny, meant-to-be garbage. Meaning she’d turned into a…hopeless romantic?
“I won’t admit why I’m sweet on her, but I am. No turning back.” She glided on the reddest, richest lipstick in her collection, thinking of it as a focal point for Taeyeon’s eyes. “I’ll have to be forward tonight.”
Lennon pressed a cold nose against her knee, whining.
Jessica corrected herself as if she and her pet spoke the same tongue. “Not too forward, I know. Taeyeon’s precarious at best. But, it can’t hurt to try. Some women don’t pick up on subtle flirting.”
She leaned over Lennon, watching his ears spring up and fuzzy butt wagging for more attention. Or a snack. “You think you’re lovable, huh?”
He spun in a doughnut-ish circle.
“Fine, you’re an absurdly lovable dog. My sister matched us well.” Jessica smoothed the flat of his head and retrieved a sweet potato pretzel from a bag on her desk. “Taeyeon claimed you’re a herder, so act on your naturally-bred abilities. Do you solemnly swear to be my wingdog?”
Lennon propped into complete stillness, silver eyes trained on her hand. Not swearing allegiance whatsoever. Rolling her eyes, Jessica tossed the treat to his greedy mouth.
Looks like she was on her own.
...
Taeyeon arrived in cutoff jeans, a half-buttoned cardigan, and the unsure smile of someone who inadvertently revealed her sexuality last week. In lieu of a ponytail, her hair grazed her shoulders in flat ironed swoops. Light blush, light mascara. Limp on her wrist hung another bag from a dog store and on her feet, of course, were those haggard Keds. Everything about her appearance begged to be pulled onto the couch for major snuggling. Jessica bit her lip, powerless to this crush.
“I bought Lennon a soft Frisbee.” Taeyeon weakly kicked her own heel, wobbling for balance. “In…in case you don’t have one already.”
Damn. Not even a ‘hello.’ Jessica tried another angle. “Nothing for me, Taengoo?”
The squishy nickname was too much, evidenced by Taeyeon’s startled step backward and rapidly coloring cheeks. “I’m sorry. This is my first time here, isn’t it? I should’ve been more considerate. Oh, god.”
“I was kidding, Taeyeon.” So much for jokes. “Lennon will love it.”
At the sound of his name, the Corgi-Aussie bounded from his dinner in the kitchen. He wetly licked his chops before leaping into Taeyeon’s arms, animatedly panting. And Taeyeon gave him a thorough pat down. Sable and white furs littered her cardigan once she finally stood at Jessica’s pointed cough.
“Lenny’s gonna love this,” Taeyeon brought the hot orange Frisbee’s price tag to her own teeth, gnawing off its plastic.
Jessica smirked red lips. “You’re part dog yourself, aren’t you?”
“In my dreams.”
“It’s interesting, your affinity for Lennon.”
“Yeah, uh,” Taeyeon shrugged six times-each less casual than the last. “I fit in with animals more than humans.”
“Don’t sell yourself short,” Jessica insisted as she made her next flirting attempt. Slowly, delicately, she chased an invisible line up Taeyeon’s arm, stopping just shy of her breast to pinch off a dog hair or two. “This world could use more Taeyeons.”
“Emotionally exhausted lesbians?”
Jessica hicked in a surprised breath. “Is that all you see in yourself?”
“It’ll be dark soon.” Taeyeon shied from Jessica’s touch, smiling politely. “Lennon needs his regular exercise or he’ll get stir crazy. Isn’t that right, Lenny?”
Not loyal in the least, Lennon scratched a stubby paw on the door. Maybe he was in love with Taeyeon, Jessica thought on an amused whim. Determinedly competing for the final rose.
And Jessica was losing miserably.
✽ ✽ ✽
Jessica acted abnormally today. Taeyeon kept this opinion to herself, unable to parse what led to Jessica’s cheerier-than-usual disposition, non-stop conversation, and lips so crimson they’d leave a target-like ‘O’ on somebody’s cheek.
She couldn’t fault Jessica for stylishness. Just…how to concentrate when she embodied idol-level beauty? How to not stare like the perverted, predatory gay friend? Because Jessica surely dated men, taking her eagerness to discuss them last Thursday into account.
Right. Keep all lesbian eyes in check.
This didn’t distract from the talky turn of personality, though. Jessica hadn’t scrolled on her phone once thus far.
“Coffee?”
Per Jessica’s suggestion, they detoured through a busier area on the way to the park. Taeyeon found herself halting in front of a coffee shop. The coffee shop where Pet Mourner’s Anonymous convened after closing hours. “You’ll buy it here?”
“Yeah, this place supplies delicious caffeine,” Jessica laughed, thumbing into her purse. “I’ll pay.”
“Don’t I owe you a drink or something?”
“Next time.” She winked. “Their roast is much too strong. Exactly how I like it.”
“Coffee’s not my thing.”
“Tea, then?”
“I don’t know.”
Jessica sighed, planting a hand firmly on her slight hip. “Tie Lennon to the bike rack. You’re coming in with me.”
‘Why don’t you listen?’ Taeyeon wanted to ask. Instead, she let Jessica take matters into her own hands, neatly securing the leash’s loop end to a metal rack. An acute sting of guilt hit her heart. If this fucking shop wouldn’t accept dogs, they should spend money where he was allowed.
What if somebody stole Lennon or fed him a strange treat? He could finagle out of that flimsy knot and run into traffic.
The fear dizzied her.
“She’s clueless,” Taeyeon muttered to herself, staring after Jessica entering the shop. “She doesn’t understand that at any moment, she could lose him.”
Lennon’s eyes leveled with Taeyeon’s. Within seconds, she gnarled painted fingernails into his fur, riling him up for a twisty tap dance. In her mind, she could pretend Lennon was no longer Jessica’s Lennon. “I won’t fail you this time, Diggy.”
...
Inside, Jessica flagged her into the moderately-sized line with a flick of a paper menu. The customers Taeyeon shyly cut in the process didn’t seem to mind, fortunately.
“They have a full page dedicated to teas,” Jessica intoned, flipping the menu twice before summoning Taeyeon to stand close enough to share the reading space. “Do you take cream and sugar in yours?”
The scent of roses clung to the air. Stronger than last time, when she’d made a fool out of herself. “Plain green tea works for me.”
“You’ve inspired me. Their matcha latte would be a good alternative to my usual Americano.”
Taeyeon peeked to the glass door for Lennon. Her right hand clutched on air, missing the phantom leash’s rough texture.
“Taeyeon?”
Oh, shit. She was still speaking. “Coffee eludes me. Too many ratios, foams, brands, flavors, shots, beans...to me, they all taste the same.”
“Your palette needs expanding, that’s all.”
“My palette suits me just fine, thank you very much.”
Jessica cleared her throat. “This isn’t worth an argument.”
If it meant leaving the vicinity that reminded Taeyeon of her failures, rushing back to Lennon’s side before harm fell upon him, and pissing Jessica off of this über-friendly spell, an argument certainly would be worth it. She’d shown up for hours bonding with Lenny. Blah blahing over drinks she hadn’t asked for sapped away valuable time.
Taeyeon didn’t poke the pushy, lissome bear any further, though. She silently seethed while Jessica ordered for them.
“Shall we sit?”
“Lennon,” Taeyeon heard herself protesting, “he’s out there. Alone.”
“He’s a well-behaved dog and it’s been like,” Jessica waved dismissively at a blue-rimmed wall clock. “Ten minutes.”
Seemed like forever. “You never know.”
Defiantly, Jessica snatched a metal chair from under a table. Its feet screeched something terrible, yet she didn’t flinch at all, immune to the other patrons meanmugging them. “Sit.”
Taeyeon would sit, but she wouldn’t engage.
Jessica proceeded in frustrating indifference. She merely plinked a cup of boiling water in front of Taeyeon, crossed her legs, and leisurely blew on a ceramic mug of viridescent foam.
Taeyeon steeped her provided tea bag, wondering at what expensive store Jessica got that lipstick. It left no prints.
“Would you care for a sip? You look interested.”
Taeyeon declined in a head shake. Less small talk, more drinking. She missed aloof, phone-bound Jessica.
Luckily, here, from the window, she had a view of her main man sitting like royalty beside the metal rack. He’d go crazy once she busted out the orange Frisbee.
“Taeyeon, how’s your tea?” Jessica napkin dabbed a stray dot of latte. “Everything you could want and more?”
A gullible gay woman could misconstrue this as couple banter. She nearly burnt her tongue entertaining that scenario. “It works.”
“Splendid.”
Ceding a small smile to pacify, Taeyeon matched Jessica sip-for-sip until their cups emptied, evading her keen gaze. And her lips.
...
When the threesome eventually arrived at the park, Taeyeon inwardly swore. In the center of the field stood a huge projection screen and a few kiosks selling blankets, drinks, and paper bags of butter popcorn.
“Summer movie night,” Jessica explained needlessly. “The season’s excellent for it.”
No. It’d be excellent to toss a Frisbee, which Taeyeon wouldn’t give up on, even if it killed her. She gestured brusquely to a less-busy section on the green, fighting a sneer. “Over there?”
A leaflet had materialized in Jessica’s hand. She glided a finger across the text, sharing, “They’re screening ‘Devil May Play’, that indie movie everyone and their mother raved about last winter. I’ve been meaning to see it.”
Taeyeon recalled poring over that movie’s reviews. Most sources labeled it a thriller and she did not handle heavy suspense and jump scares well. She hoped her silence expressed her utter disinterest as they found a gap of their own on the grass.
“Sit, Lens,” Jessica commanded. In seconds, Lennon sank to his haunches, sniffing the air of its activity and junk food that had no business in a dog’s stomach. In the same breath, she continued, “Are you into movies?”
“Not ones like this,” Taeyeon admitted.
“I love thrillers. The subtleties, the foreshadowing, the problem-solving…I’m into it.”
Lennon’s eyes practically bugged out their sockets at the sight of the new neon toy. So comical and attentive. Diggy 2.0. Lips easing into an easy grin, Taeyeon flicked the disc skyward and her furry companion rocketed off in hot pursuit.
“It starts in an hour.”
“And?” Taeyeon asked dumbly, ‘aww’ing at Lennon clumsily missing his orange prey by a hair. She sensed Jessica hovering, anticipating it almost. Instinctively, she held her breath to stave off the pleasant scent that’d soon follow.
Jessica rolled the flier, deep in thought. “Be my movie date?”
‘Date.’ What a laugh. Straight girls should mind their wording. “I’m not into scary movies.”
“It’s not scary; it’s suspense.”
“Same difference. I get anxiety easily.”
Jessica shrugged flippantly. “I know.”
“This is better, yeah?” She sent the Frisbee sailing into the warm air. “Lennon gets his due exercise.”
“Can’t I-we spend more time together? You kind of owe me.”
Taeyeon could slap herself. Why didn’t she freaking remember her courtesies? Then, she wouldn’t be indebted to wince through two hours of blood splatters and those low musical interludes that threatened danger at every corner. At the very least, she and her ex agreed on one thing-scary movies were pointless.
Fearless Jessica, on the other hand, studied her with the whisper of a smirk. Waiting for her inevitable ‘yes’.
“You’re going to laugh at me.”
“I won’t,” Jessica replied, catching wind-blown hairs behind her ear. A few strands escaped, anyways, twirling across her nose and lips.
Lovely.
Taeyeon’s throat went dry. Extra tea would be helpful about now.
“I can diffuse tense moments, if you’d like.”
Tense aptly described how her insides coiled upon themselves like a den of snakes.
A cold nose nudged her from her daze. She absently smoothed Lennon’s head, situating herself back on solid ground. Her words were spoken to him, but she knew Jessica listened attentively. “Sure, okay. I’ll watch.”
“You won’t be sorry.” In small contact, Jessica hooked a finger into the loop of Taeyeon’s jean shorts. “Thank you.”
‘Please stop touching me. It’s mean.’
If only she’d lost her manners enough to state that aloud. She despised torment of this magnitude: the strong, divine pull of a woman who simply wanted to be friendly. Somewhere between man buns and those manicured hands reaching out, Taeyeon shoehorned herself into an awkward corner.
A tear slugged down Taeyeon’s cheek.
Jessica took the hint to let go, thankfully. “I’ll buy us a blanket. Would you like popcorn or a soda?”
“No.”
If this woman ran screaming into the night, Taeyeon wouldn’t blame her. Why hassle oneself with such a loser?
“Your boyfriend’s still hyper,” Jessica called out from a fair distance, trotting backwards.
Predictably, Lennon danced his Diglett jig, fittingly kicking up dirt in a high of fetch euphoria.
God, a dog’s life must be the tits. Lucky bastard.
Brightening, Taeyeon arced an arm and threw his addiction into the wind.
✽ ✽ ✽
Jessica considered herself knowledgeable. Graduating cum laude from college, remembering to offer seats to the elderly on public transit, doing math in her head for discount blouses. And within her wealth of skills, she could sus out tactics to woo a potential girlfriend. Until now.
The quick crying spell cast an x-ray view of a layered, aggrieved individual. She had no idea what this ex-girlfriend of Taeyeon’s wrought upon her past, but it couldn’t hurt to offer an alternative. An intimate, observant alternative who smoothed out a place next to her on a violet fleece blanket, intent on a proper one-on-one.
Well, one-on-one-on-one, including the animal.
On purpose, Jessica had taken her time browsing unappetizing concessions to give Taeyeon her private bonding time with Lennon. She wasn’t too proud to spare them of her lackluster throwing ability.
She lent a solid fifty-five minutes to the pair dirtying themselves over the floppy new dog toy and it turned out to be more difficult than she’d thought. Now that she’d perched across from Taeyeon at her favorite coffee shop, concluding her to be ‘ideal girlfriend height’, Jessica resented her patience. What if she’d come out right after Taeyeon? It’d affect their progress.
But, Jessica knew lesbians. Oftentimes, they fucked based on proximity. She’d prefer for Taeyeon to notice her for her personality, her effort.
She whipped up fictitious clichés: gazing at the sunset, strolling down a beach shore, pillow talk in the dead of night, picking out linens. She dreamily inserted Taeyeon in all of them. Even if they seemed unrealistic.
Because of Taeyeon’s borderline repellant behavior, Jessica should’ve been texting Seohyun, the classy colleague who grazed their legs under the table during team-building meetings. She’d become so forward lately and Jessica did miss getting pleasured.
Would Taeyeon ever be forward?
Jessica’s heart picked up speed, peering at Taeyeon finding a comfortable sitting position next to her. Lennon propped his head onto her lap and had already been treated to a massage behind his upturned ears. Scooting closer, Jessica asked, “Nervous about the film?”
Taeyeon relayed a dismal grin. “As if I didn’t make it obvious.”
“This isn’t horror, you know.”
“Depends on how you define horrific.”
“I told you I can diffuse this, didn’t I?” Jessica leaned sideways, testing her weight on Taeyeon’s shoulder. “If I talk through the movie, it’ll be less scary.”
“Isn’t that rude?”
Jessica mentally measured the sufficient space between them and the moviegoers yards ahead. “Who cares? We’re too far for anyone to hear me.”
“I’d…” She glanced up at the screen lighting on, her flesh and gronde hair aglow. “I’d appreciate that, honestly.”
Taeyeon twitched as she spoke this, minute muscles in her jaw taut. How couldn’t Jessica-or any emphatic person, really- not protectively wrap their arms around her at all costs?
Rather than going in for the kill, Jessica clamped her hands between her calves in self-inflicted discipline. She’d worn a cute black pair of high-waist shorts (who knows if her crush even noticed) and couldn’t help comparing her legs to Taeyeon’s. They were similar in slimness and length, only differences being hers lacked flecks of grass and pink splotches from tumbling on the ground. And on their feet-Taeyeon’s classic dingy Keds versus silver Prada slip-ons Jessica had splurged on with Krystal. She blushed at how the contrast heightened her attraction, how Taeyeon not bothering to dust herself clean revealed someone undeterred by picture-perfect appearances.
Jessica could use someone like that in her life.
Hardly ten minutes of movie had passed before Taeyeon flinched at the loud bang of the totally-innocuous-but-probably-the-killer’s suitcase hitting a conference room wall. To allay fear, Jessica touched their shoulders again, sharing her prediction, “So, what do you want to bet he murdered those high school kids?”
Nighttime shadows and the screen brightness emphasized those micro-expressions Jessica loved so much. Chiaroscuro at its finest. “Can’t be. This dude’s clumsy as hell; he’d leave so many clues behind.”
“That’s what they want you to think.”
When Taeyeon scowled, unconvinced, Jessica whispered close, “Are you familiar with that actor? If he’s not playing a low-key villain, he’s always a henchman or an alpha-type murderer. Always.”
While that spoiler-ish comment would piss off a regular viewer, Taeyeon proved herself to be the contrary. An uptick of her lips relaxed into a meek grin. “That helps. Thanks.”
Below, Lennon grunted sharply in his sleep. They giggled softly. And Jessica chanced another moment, matching bedroom eyes to Taeyeon’s more receptive expression. “I’m glad we’re doing this.”
“Raising my blood pressure?”
Jessica knocked her thigh into Taeyeon’s upturned knee. “You’re a good sport.”
As the thriller’s plot thickened, Jessica’s commentary eased most of the terror in the other woman’s body language. Then, when Taeyeon stopped petting Lennon’s back to settle her weight on one arm, Jessica scooped up the unoccupied hand.
“Squeeze if you’re surprised,” she assured, tempted to kiss the mouth hinged open in fright. The story’s intensity had compounded, now blanketed in darkness as the female lead’s teenage daughter screamed help in a sauna bolted from the outside.
“Well, shit,” Taeyeon breathed, testing her hand in an interlocked grip. She seemed more petrified than the actress.
Smiling, Jessica rested her chin on Taeyeon’s shoulder, asking, “Do you use saunas?”
“Not anymore, I won’t.”
“You’re so funny.” Her lashes fluttered. “Funny and pretty, Taengoo.”
Their fingers tightened in a jolt and Jessica suspected it had nothing to do with the suspicious warped shadow falling on the sauna glass. Taeyeon murmured a slow, “I think you’re pretty, too.”
“Not funny?”
Her rare smirk lasted less than three seconds. “Both.”
Satisfied, Jessica sat up to allow Taeyeon some assumedly-needed distance. Though, their hands remained together. Even if that very killer burst from the screen to slaughter the spectators, they’d just have to escape together. Them and a dog Taeyeon would probably defend above all else.
...
Jessica and Taeyeon held hands through the leash loop on their walk home.
Humid warmth weighed the air, the streetlights glowed in a safe row, Lennon tagged between them, lagging every minute or so to sniff the concrete. Nothing had ever felt so damn peaceful.
Taeyeon’s fingernails sparkled. It hadn’t been too visible until after the movie, when Jessica shook their hands in a ‘Congratulations, We Survived’ gesture. To folks who overlooked Taeyeon, her nails would appear clear. When, in actuality, they’d been polished a layer of pearl glitter. As gronde as her hair.
This concept exemplified Kim Taeyeon. Allegedly ‘disappointing’ at first glance, yet contained so much promise of more.
Jessica wanted more.
“You were right,” Taeyeon granted as they slowed in front of Jessica’s apartment door. “Clumsy dude killed all those teens.”
Feeling high, Jessica claimed Taeyeon’s other hand, making a halo of their arms over Lennon. “The detective would’ve caught him twenty minutes into the movie if she’d worn sensible shoes. Who pursues murderers in heels?”
Her teeth showed in a grin, quickly eclipsed by a sad shadow. “You have it all together, Jessica.”
“Have what?”
“It. Life. Lennon.”
“And you now have Lennon, too.”
Taeyeon’s smile for the dog lasted longer. “Cool.”
Jessica swung their hands, regaining the spotlight. She took a breath.
Tread carefully, she reminded herself.
“I think I’m returning to the dating world,” she blurted in a cascade of fast words. “I’d like to go out again.”
Taeyeon’s brow creased; she looked both puzzled and mortified.
Jessica edged closer, voice tentative. “Would you, too? Like to date?”
Me. She should’ve added ‘me’.
Go out with me, Taeyeon.
A long pause followed.
A very, very long, pregnant pause. Where Taeyeon’s shoulders jittered as if she’d collapse at any given push. As if the wind could sweep her away.
Eventually, Taeyeon untangled their fingers, slipping a hand into her shorts pocket. “I get it.”
Did she? Jessica remained silent.
“I’m...not interested, Jessica. Sorry.”
Crazy how this heartbreak shook her more than any to date. Probably because this was the end to a relationship that hadn’t started. Brakes to a ride barely departed from the driveway. She would’ve bet money Taeyeon shared a tinge of feelings.
“I know you don’t want me hanging around. You’re obviously a catch...”
Then, catch me, Jessica struggled not to beg, clutching the twinned straps of her bags. Meet me halfway.
“While you’re...out...with suitors and stuff, I’ll dog-sit Lennon. He and I will be out of your hair.”
Bewildered to the precipice of anger, Jessica glared down at her pet as if she forgot he was there. Because she deserved to forget him for a five-minute human conversation. Why in the hell would Taeyeon bring him up now, of all times?
Rejection.
Taeyeon rejected her.
Jessica plucked the leash from a hand that once held hers, overcompensating for the cry in her voice. “Great. It’s settled, then.”
“You made me enjoy the movie tonight. Thanks again.”
Wedged in her doorway, as faux-cheery as possible, she returned, “You’re welcome, Taeyeon. See you next Thursday.”
[A/N]Crept on the tumblrs for gifs that felt like MLG's Jessica. These work. :333
gifs snatched from jung-jessica
Pairing(s): TaengSic
Rating/Genre: PG-13; Girl-Meets-Dog-And-Girl
Disclaimer: I don't own Soshi. I don't own anyone, in fact. All Fiction.
Chap. Summary: Jessica tiptoes the line between flirting and respecting Taeyeon’s reluctance.
Author's Notes: Speaking of Pokémon and Korea, who’s seen The Deflating Pikachu Tackle-Rama?!!! Haahahha omggg our world is so random.
✽ ✽ ✽
“Why couldn’t you find me actual girlfriend material, canine!?”
As expected, Lennon returned Jessica’s question with a weak whimper and a butt shake. His conveniently useless contribution at 5pm that next Thursday.
Jessica spritzed her neck, faintly (severely) worrying what brand of freaking perfume gave her that rosy aroma. Honestly, she couldn’t recall any of her floral fragrances being rose-based. Taeyeon must’ve sucked with smell-recognition.
Which was bloody cute.
Ugh, why the fuck did Jessica’s pickiness take a nosedive?
Her diatribe filled the apartment. “You’re selfish, you know that, Lens? Instead of attracting-oh, I don’t know-a woman my own damn age who can make adult conversation, you bring me Kim Taeyeon. Kim Taeyeon!” She shooed him from her rage path to the bedroom closet. “Odd, dog-obsessed Taeyeon with her filthy canvas sneakers and...”
Taeyeon’s bashful smile. Her micro-expressions. Those wisps of gronde hair escaping her ponytail.
Her humility, unpretentious intelligence, her multitude of layers-like an over-foiled Cadbury Egg or a Photoshop document.
Not-so-eloquent similes withstanding, Jessica Jung fell victim to the irrational lure of destiny, meant-to-be garbage. Meaning she’d turned into a…hopeless romantic?
“I won’t admit why I’m sweet on her, but I am. No turning back.” She glided on the reddest, richest lipstick in her collection, thinking of it as a focal point for Taeyeon’s eyes. “I’ll have to be forward tonight.”
Lennon pressed a cold nose against her knee, whining.
Jessica corrected herself as if she and her pet spoke the same tongue. “Not too forward, I know. Taeyeon’s precarious at best. But, it can’t hurt to try. Some women don’t pick up on subtle flirting.”
She leaned over Lennon, watching his ears spring up and fuzzy butt wagging for more attention. Or a snack. “You think you’re lovable, huh?”
He spun in a doughnut-ish circle.
“Fine, you’re an absurdly lovable dog. My sister matched us well.” Jessica smoothed the flat of his head and retrieved a sweet potato pretzel from a bag on her desk. “Taeyeon claimed you’re a herder, so act on your naturally-bred abilities. Do you solemnly swear to be my wingdog?”
Lennon propped into complete stillness, silver eyes trained on her hand. Not swearing allegiance whatsoever. Rolling her eyes, Jessica tossed the treat to his greedy mouth.
Looks like she was on her own.
...
Taeyeon arrived in cutoff jeans, a half-buttoned cardigan, and the unsure smile of someone who inadvertently revealed her sexuality last week. In lieu of a ponytail, her hair grazed her shoulders in flat ironed swoops. Light blush, light mascara. Limp on her wrist hung another bag from a dog store and on her feet, of course, were those haggard Keds. Everything about her appearance begged to be pulled onto the couch for major snuggling. Jessica bit her lip, powerless to this crush.
“I bought Lennon a soft Frisbee.” Taeyeon weakly kicked her own heel, wobbling for balance. “In…in case you don’t have one already.”
Damn. Not even a ‘hello.’ Jessica tried another angle. “Nothing for me, Taengoo?”
The squishy nickname was too much, evidenced by Taeyeon’s startled step backward and rapidly coloring cheeks. “I’m sorry. This is my first time here, isn’t it? I should’ve been more considerate. Oh, god.”
“I was kidding, Taeyeon.” So much for jokes. “Lennon will love it.”
At the sound of his name, the Corgi-Aussie bounded from his dinner in the kitchen. He wetly licked his chops before leaping into Taeyeon’s arms, animatedly panting. And Taeyeon gave him a thorough pat down. Sable and white furs littered her cardigan once she finally stood at Jessica’s pointed cough.
“Lenny’s gonna love this,” Taeyeon brought the hot orange Frisbee’s price tag to her own teeth, gnawing off its plastic.
Jessica smirked red lips. “You’re part dog yourself, aren’t you?”
“In my dreams.”
“It’s interesting, your affinity for Lennon.”
“Yeah, uh,” Taeyeon shrugged six times-each less casual than the last. “I fit in with animals more than humans.”
“Don’t sell yourself short,” Jessica insisted as she made her next flirting attempt. Slowly, delicately, she chased an invisible line up Taeyeon’s arm, stopping just shy of her breast to pinch off a dog hair or two. “This world could use more Taeyeons.”
“Emotionally exhausted lesbians?”
Jessica hicked in a surprised breath. “Is that all you see in yourself?”
“It’ll be dark soon.” Taeyeon shied from Jessica’s touch, smiling politely. “Lennon needs his regular exercise or he’ll get stir crazy. Isn’t that right, Lenny?”
Not loyal in the least, Lennon scratched a stubby paw on the door. Maybe he was in love with Taeyeon, Jessica thought on an amused whim. Determinedly competing for the final rose.
And Jessica was losing miserably.
✽ ✽ ✽
Jessica acted abnormally today. Taeyeon kept this opinion to herself, unable to parse what led to Jessica’s cheerier-than-usual disposition, non-stop conversation, and lips so crimson they’d leave a target-like ‘O’ on somebody’s cheek.
She couldn’t fault Jessica for stylishness. Just…how to concentrate when she embodied idol-level beauty? How to not stare like the perverted, predatory gay friend? Because Jessica surely dated men, taking her eagerness to discuss them last Thursday into account.
Right. Keep all lesbian eyes in check.
This didn’t distract from the talky turn of personality, though. Jessica hadn’t scrolled on her phone once thus far.
“Coffee?”
Per Jessica’s suggestion, they detoured through a busier area on the way to the park. Taeyeon found herself halting in front of a coffee shop. The coffee shop where Pet Mourner’s Anonymous convened after closing hours. “You’ll buy it here?”
“Yeah, this place supplies delicious caffeine,” Jessica laughed, thumbing into her purse. “I’ll pay.”
“Don’t I owe you a drink or something?”
“Next time.” She winked. “Their roast is much too strong. Exactly how I like it.”
“Coffee’s not my thing.”
“Tea, then?”
“I don’t know.”
Jessica sighed, planting a hand firmly on her slight hip. “Tie Lennon to the bike rack. You’re coming in with me.”
‘Why don’t you listen?’ Taeyeon wanted to ask. Instead, she let Jessica take matters into her own hands, neatly securing the leash’s loop end to a metal rack. An acute sting of guilt hit her heart. If this fucking shop wouldn’t accept dogs, they should spend money where he was allowed.
What if somebody stole Lennon or fed him a strange treat? He could finagle out of that flimsy knot and run into traffic.
The fear dizzied her.
“She’s clueless,” Taeyeon muttered to herself, staring after Jessica entering the shop. “She doesn’t understand that at any moment, she could lose him.”
Lennon’s eyes leveled with Taeyeon’s. Within seconds, she gnarled painted fingernails into his fur, riling him up for a twisty tap dance. In her mind, she could pretend Lennon was no longer Jessica’s Lennon. “I won’t fail you this time, Diggy.”
...
Inside, Jessica flagged her into the moderately-sized line with a flick of a paper menu. The customers Taeyeon shyly cut in the process didn’t seem to mind, fortunately.
“They have a full page dedicated to teas,” Jessica intoned, flipping the menu twice before summoning Taeyeon to stand close enough to share the reading space. “Do you take cream and sugar in yours?”
The scent of roses clung to the air. Stronger than last time, when she’d made a fool out of herself. “Plain green tea works for me.”
“You’ve inspired me. Their matcha latte would be a good alternative to my usual Americano.”
Taeyeon peeked to the glass door for Lennon. Her right hand clutched on air, missing the phantom leash’s rough texture.
“Taeyeon?”
Oh, shit. She was still speaking. “Coffee eludes me. Too many ratios, foams, brands, flavors, shots, beans...to me, they all taste the same.”
“Your palette needs expanding, that’s all.”
“My palette suits me just fine, thank you very much.”
Jessica cleared her throat. “This isn’t worth an argument.”
If it meant leaving the vicinity that reminded Taeyeon of her failures, rushing back to Lennon’s side before harm fell upon him, and pissing Jessica off of this über-friendly spell, an argument certainly would be worth it. She’d shown up for hours bonding with Lenny. Blah blahing over drinks she hadn’t asked for sapped away valuable time.
Taeyeon didn’t poke the pushy, lissome bear any further, though. She silently seethed while Jessica ordered for them.
“Shall we sit?”
“Lennon,” Taeyeon heard herself protesting, “he’s out there. Alone.”
“He’s a well-behaved dog and it’s been like,” Jessica waved dismissively at a blue-rimmed wall clock. “Ten minutes.”
Seemed like forever. “You never know.”
Defiantly, Jessica snatched a metal chair from under a table. Its feet screeched something terrible, yet she didn’t flinch at all, immune to the other patrons meanmugging them. “Sit.”
Taeyeon would sit, but she wouldn’t engage.
Jessica proceeded in frustrating indifference. She merely plinked a cup of boiling water in front of Taeyeon, crossed her legs, and leisurely blew on a ceramic mug of viridescent foam.
Taeyeon steeped her provided tea bag, wondering at what expensive store Jessica got that lipstick. It left no prints.
“Would you care for a sip? You look interested.”
Taeyeon declined in a head shake. Less small talk, more drinking. She missed aloof, phone-bound Jessica.
Luckily, here, from the window, she had a view of her main man sitting like royalty beside the metal rack. He’d go crazy once she busted out the orange Frisbee.
“Taeyeon, how’s your tea?” Jessica napkin dabbed a stray dot of latte. “Everything you could want and more?”
A gullible gay woman could misconstrue this as couple banter. She nearly burnt her tongue entertaining that scenario. “It works.”
“Splendid.”
Ceding a small smile to pacify, Taeyeon matched Jessica sip-for-sip until their cups emptied, evading her keen gaze. And her lips.
...
When the threesome eventually arrived at the park, Taeyeon inwardly swore. In the center of the field stood a huge projection screen and a few kiosks selling blankets, drinks, and paper bags of butter popcorn.
“Summer movie night,” Jessica explained needlessly. “The season’s excellent for it.”
No. It’d be excellent to toss a Frisbee, which Taeyeon wouldn’t give up on, even if it killed her. She gestured brusquely to a less-busy section on the green, fighting a sneer. “Over there?”
A leaflet had materialized in Jessica’s hand. She glided a finger across the text, sharing, “They’re screening ‘Devil May Play’, that indie movie everyone and their mother raved about last winter. I’ve been meaning to see it.”
Taeyeon recalled poring over that movie’s reviews. Most sources labeled it a thriller and she did not handle heavy suspense and jump scares well. She hoped her silence expressed her utter disinterest as they found a gap of their own on the grass.
“Sit, Lens,” Jessica commanded. In seconds, Lennon sank to his haunches, sniffing the air of its activity and junk food that had no business in a dog’s stomach. In the same breath, she continued, “Are you into movies?”
“Not ones like this,” Taeyeon admitted.
“I love thrillers. The subtleties, the foreshadowing, the problem-solving…I’m into it.”
Lennon’s eyes practically bugged out their sockets at the sight of the new neon toy. So comical and attentive. Diggy 2.0. Lips easing into an easy grin, Taeyeon flicked the disc skyward and her furry companion rocketed off in hot pursuit.
“It starts in an hour.”
“And?” Taeyeon asked dumbly, ‘aww’ing at Lennon clumsily missing his orange prey by a hair. She sensed Jessica hovering, anticipating it almost. Instinctively, she held her breath to stave off the pleasant scent that’d soon follow.
Jessica rolled the flier, deep in thought. “Be my movie date?”
‘Date.’ What a laugh. Straight girls should mind their wording. “I’m not into scary movies.”
“It’s not scary; it’s suspense.”
“Same difference. I get anxiety easily.”
Jessica shrugged flippantly. “I know.”
“This is better, yeah?” She sent the Frisbee sailing into the warm air. “Lennon gets his due exercise.”
“Can’t I-we spend more time together? You kind of owe me.”
Taeyeon could slap herself. Why didn’t she freaking remember her courtesies? Then, she wouldn’t be indebted to wince through two hours of blood splatters and those low musical interludes that threatened danger at every corner. At the very least, she and her ex agreed on one thing-scary movies were pointless.
Fearless Jessica, on the other hand, studied her with the whisper of a smirk. Waiting for her inevitable ‘yes’.
“You’re going to laugh at me.”
“I won’t,” Jessica replied, catching wind-blown hairs behind her ear. A few strands escaped, anyways, twirling across her nose and lips.
Lovely.
Taeyeon’s throat went dry. Extra tea would be helpful about now.
“I can diffuse tense moments, if you’d like.”
Tense aptly described how her insides coiled upon themselves like a den of snakes.
A cold nose nudged her from her daze. She absently smoothed Lennon’s head, situating herself back on solid ground. Her words were spoken to him, but she knew Jessica listened attentively. “Sure, okay. I’ll watch.”
“You won’t be sorry.” In small contact, Jessica hooked a finger into the loop of Taeyeon’s jean shorts. “Thank you.”
‘Please stop touching me. It’s mean.’
If only she’d lost her manners enough to state that aloud. She despised torment of this magnitude: the strong, divine pull of a woman who simply wanted to be friendly. Somewhere between man buns and those manicured hands reaching out, Taeyeon shoehorned herself into an awkward corner.
A tear slugged down Taeyeon’s cheek.
Jessica took the hint to let go, thankfully. “I’ll buy us a blanket. Would you like popcorn or a soda?”
“No.”
If this woman ran screaming into the night, Taeyeon wouldn’t blame her. Why hassle oneself with such a loser?
“Your boyfriend’s still hyper,” Jessica called out from a fair distance, trotting backwards.
Predictably, Lennon danced his Diglett jig, fittingly kicking up dirt in a high of fetch euphoria.
God, a dog’s life must be the tits. Lucky bastard.
Brightening, Taeyeon arced an arm and threw his addiction into the wind.
✽ ✽ ✽
Jessica considered herself knowledgeable. Graduating cum laude from college, remembering to offer seats to the elderly on public transit, doing math in her head for discount blouses. And within her wealth of skills, she could sus out tactics to woo a potential girlfriend. Until now.
The quick crying spell cast an x-ray view of a layered, aggrieved individual. She had no idea what this ex-girlfriend of Taeyeon’s wrought upon her past, but it couldn’t hurt to offer an alternative. An intimate, observant alternative who smoothed out a place next to her on a violet fleece blanket, intent on a proper one-on-one.
Well, one-on-one-on-one, including the animal.
On purpose, Jessica had taken her time browsing unappetizing concessions to give Taeyeon her private bonding time with Lennon. She wasn’t too proud to spare them of her lackluster throwing ability.
She lent a solid fifty-five minutes to the pair dirtying themselves over the floppy new dog toy and it turned out to be more difficult than she’d thought. Now that she’d perched across from Taeyeon at her favorite coffee shop, concluding her to be ‘ideal girlfriend height’, Jessica resented her patience. What if she’d come out right after Taeyeon? It’d affect their progress.
But, Jessica knew lesbians. Oftentimes, they fucked based on proximity. She’d prefer for Taeyeon to notice her for her personality, her effort.
She whipped up fictitious clichés: gazing at the sunset, strolling down a beach shore, pillow talk in the dead of night, picking out linens. She dreamily inserted Taeyeon in all of them. Even if they seemed unrealistic.
Because of Taeyeon’s borderline repellant behavior, Jessica should’ve been texting Seohyun, the classy colleague who grazed their legs under the table during team-building meetings. She’d become so forward lately and Jessica did miss getting pleasured.
Would Taeyeon ever be forward?
Jessica’s heart picked up speed, peering at Taeyeon finding a comfortable sitting position next to her. Lennon propped his head onto her lap and had already been treated to a massage behind his upturned ears. Scooting closer, Jessica asked, “Nervous about the film?”
Taeyeon relayed a dismal grin. “As if I didn’t make it obvious.”
“This isn’t horror, you know.”
“Depends on how you define horrific.”
“I told you I can diffuse this, didn’t I?” Jessica leaned sideways, testing her weight on Taeyeon’s shoulder. “If I talk through the movie, it’ll be less scary.”
“Isn’t that rude?”
Jessica mentally measured the sufficient space between them and the moviegoers yards ahead. “Who cares? We’re too far for anyone to hear me.”
“I’d…” She glanced up at the screen lighting on, her flesh and gronde hair aglow. “I’d appreciate that, honestly.”
Taeyeon twitched as she spoke this, minute muscles in her jaw taut. How couldn’t Jessica-or any emphatic person, really- not protectively wrap their arms around her at all costs?
Rather than going in for the kill, Jessica clamped her hands between her calves in self-inflicted discipline. She’d worn a cute black pair of high-waist shorts (who knows if her crush even noticed) and couldn’t help comparing her legs to Taeyeon’s. They were similar in slimness and length, only differences being hers lacked flecks of grass and pink splotches from tumbling on the ground. And on their feet-Taeyeon’s classic dingy Keds versus silver Prada slip-ons Jessica had splurged on with Krystal. She blushed at how the contrast heightened her attraction, how Taeyeon not bothering to dust herself clean revealed someone undeterred by picture-perfect appearances.
Jessica could use someone like that in her life.
Hardly ten minutes of movie had passed before Taeyeon flinched at the loud bang of the totally-innocuous-but-probably-the-killer’s suitcase hitting a conference room wall. To allay fear, Jessica touched their shoulders again, sharing her prediction, “So, what do you want to bet he murdered those high school kids?”
Nighttime shadows and the screen brightness emphasized those micro-expressions Jessica loved so much. Chiaroscuro at its finest. “Can’t be. This dude’s clumsy as hell; he’d leave so many clues behind.”
“That’s what they want you to think.”
When Taeyeon scowled, unconvinced, Jessica whispered close, “Are you familiar with that actor? If he’s not playing a low-key villain, he’s always a henchman or an alpha-type murderer. Always.”
While that spoiler-ish comment would piss off a regular viewer, Taeyeon proved herself to be the contrary. An uptick of her lips relaxed into a meek grin. “That helps. Thanks.”
Below, Lennon grunted sharply in his sleep. They giggled softly. And Jessica chanced another moment, matching bedroom eyes to Taeyeon’s more receptive expression. “I’m glad we’re doing this.”
“Raising my blood pressure?”
Jessica knocked her thigh into Taeyeon’s upturned knee. “You’re a good sport.”
As the thriller’s plot thickened, Jessica’s commentary eased most of the terror in the other woman’s body language. Then, when Taeyeon stopped petting Lennon’s back to settle her weight on one arm, Jessica scooped up the unoccupied hand.
“Squeeze if you’re surprised,” she assured, tempted to kiss the mouth hinged open in fright. The story’s intensity had compounded, now blanketed in darkness as the female lead’s teenage daughter screamed help in a sauna bolted from the outside.
“Well, shit,” Taeyeon breathed, testing her hand in an interlocked grip. She seemed more petrified than the actress.
Smiling, Jessica rested her chin on Taeyeon’s shoulder, asking, “Do you use saunas?”
“Not anymore, I won’t.”
“You’re so funny.” Her lashes fluttered. “Funny and pretty, Taengoo.”
Their fingers tightened in a jolt and Jessica suspected it had nothing to do with the suspicious warped shadow falling on the sauna glass. Taeyeon murmured a slow, “I think you’re pretty, too.”
“Not funny?”
Her rare smirk lasted less than three seconds. “Both.”
Satisfied, Jessica sat up to allow Taeyeon some assumedly-needed distance. Though, their hands remained together. Even if that very killer burst from the screen to slaughter the spectators, they’d just have to escape together. Them and a dog Taeyeon would probably defend above all else.
...
Jessica and Taeyeon held hands through the leash loop on their walk home.
Humid warmth weighed the air, the streetlights glowed in a safe row, Lennon tagged between them, lagging every minute or so to sniff the concrete. Nothing had ever felt so damn peaceful.
Taeyeon’s fingernails sparkled. It hadn’t been too visible until after the movie, when Jessica shook their hands in a ‘Congratulations, We Survived’ gesture. To folks who overlooked Taeyeon, her nails would appear clear. When, in actuality, they’d been polished a layer of pearl glitter. As gronde as her hair.
This concept exemplified Kim Taeyeon. Allegedly ‘disappointing’ at first glance, yet contained so much promise of more.
Jessica wanted more.
“You were right,” Taeyeon granted as they slowed in front of Jessica’s apartment door. “Clumsy dude killed all those teens.”
Feeling high, Jessica claimed Taeyeon’s other hand, making a halo of their arms over Lennon. “The detective would’ve caught him twenty minutes into the movie if she’d worn sensible shoes. Who pursues murderers in heels?”
Her teeth showed in a grin, quickly eclipsed by a sad shadow. “You have it all together, Jessica.”
“Have what?”
“It. Life. Lennon.”
“And you now have Lennon, too.”
Taeyeon’s smile for the dog lasted longer. “Cool.”
Jessica swung their hands, regaining the spotlight. She took a breath.
Tread carefully, she reminded herself.
“I think I’m returning to the dating world,” she blurted in a cascade of fast words. “I’d like to go out again.”
Taeyeon’s brow creased; she looked both puzzled and mortified.
Jessica edged closer, voice tentative. “Would you, too? Like to date?”
Me. She should’ve added ‘me’.
Go out with me, Taeyeon.
A long pause followed.
A very, very long, pregnant pause. Where Taeyeon’s shoulders jittered as if she’d collapse at any given push. As if the wind could sweep her away.
Eventually, Taeyeon untangled their fingers, slipping a hand into her shorts pocket. “I get it.”
Did she? Jessica remained silent.
“I’m...not interested, Jessica. Sorry.”
Crazy how this heartbreak shook her more than any to date. Probably because this was the end to a relationship that hadn’t started. Brakes to a ride barely departed from the driveway. She would’ve bet money Taeyeon shared a tinge of feelings.
“I know you don’t want me hanging around. You’re obviously a catch...”
Then, catch me, Jessica struggled not to beg, clutching the twinned straps of her bags. Meet me halfway.
“While you’re...out...with suitors and stuff, I’ll dog-sit Lennon. He and I will be out of your hair.”
Bewildered to the precipice of anger, Jessica glared down at her pet as if she forgot he was there. Because she deserved to forget him for a five-minute human conversation. Why in the hell would Taeyeon bring him up now, of all times?
Rejection.
Taeyeon rejected her.
Jessica plucked the leash from a hand that once held hers, overcompensating for the cry in her voice. “Great. It’s settled, then.”
“You made me enjoy the movie tonight. Thanks again.”
Wedged in her doorway, as faux-cheery as possible, she returned, “You’re welcome, Taeyeon. See you next Thursday.”
[A/N]Crept on the tumblrs for gifs that felt like MLG's Jessica. These work. :333
gifs snatched from jung-jessica