Tonight...

[chewmilk]

...I wonder if Adam ever felt this bad when he was breaking my heart.  

Comments

[wickedsin]

guys for the most part generally carry less guilt

please e-mail me and tell me what the heck is going on

[chewmilk]

I will.

[moryana2]

Let me know if I can do anything to help.

[chewmilk]

thanks. There's not really anything anyone can do. I'll just have to get over being a total jerk.

[war_is_god]

I think that the bigger guilt came from not being able to do the things that were necessary to truly be in love with you for a year or so before we broke up. I felt bad for that year because I wanted so much to be able to get things right, just like that Far Star song, If I Could Put it Together Right I Would. I wanted so much to be the one to marry you, to be able to be the one for you in that way that I know I could want no one else. I know that sounds bad, and that you have heard it before from me in some way, shape or form, but that is truly the worst year and half or so of my life. I still love you and care for you, but I don't know what it was inside me that died and that made it difficult for me to love you, but it did. At some low points, I felt like you were more of a sister than anything else. Yes, that probably sounds worse, but really I mean it in that way that I care about you as you were my best friend for 3 years and you're still someone whom I admire and respect, but there was just never that spark I felt I was missing