Why you should never leave a theater tech major in charge of house repairs
1. They don't know how to actually repair anything, and have all too many ideas for how to do something that looks like it's repairing something.
2. ...actually, 1 pretty much covers it.
Trying to get a $130K appraisal out of what was once a $134K house... 3 years after the market peaked and 1 year after the flood turned a "partially finished basement with full bath" into a "completely unfinished basement with a closet occupied by not-removed-but-not-functioning plumbing."
So among other last minute scramblefixes, I needed to clamp a broken-off slab of plaster back onto the ceiling. Clamps generally involve pinching around both sides of something to press them together. However, this was the ceiling. No getting-around that. Not a lot of options close by, either.
So what did I come up with?
Why yes, that IS a stack of 2 phone books, a piece of Corningware, and a packet of note cards being used to brace the bottom of a random slab of wood and a broken broom handle.
Frankly, my biggest surprise was that it actually stayed in place for the full hour needed for the glue to dry, and that the cat thundering through the kitchen hadn't set up enough shockwaves to knock the whole thing down.
Also, note to self for next time: get lunch out of the refrigerator BEFORE setting up an incredibly precarious bunch of bracing that needs to stay put for an hour and putting it 2 inches from the refrigerator door. ^^;;;
(FYI, the insurance company estimated 2 years ago that it would cost me $900 to have this actually repaired, by moving all the furniture out, taking down the damaged plaster, refinishing the ceiling, and moving all the furniture back. My cost so far for this project? A few cents for the smears of wood glue I used to reattach the plaster chunk that was coming off, $3.67 for a squeeze tube of popcorn-texture-patcher, and $2 for a sample-size bit of white eggshell paint that I'll slap over the popcorn texture once I've let it cure overnight. Sometimes you don't really want a theater tech major taking a go at it... but decide the savings might well be worth it anyway. :3)
2. ...actually, 1 pretty much covers it.
Trying to get a $130K appraisal out of what was once a $134K house... 3 years after the market peaked and 1 year after the flood turned a "partially finished basement with full bath" into a "completely unfinished basement with a closet occupied by not-removed-but-not-functioning plumbing."
So among other last minute scramblefixes, I needed to clamp a broken-off slab of plaster back onto the ceiling. Clamps generally involve pinching around both sides of something to press them together. However, this was the ceiling. No getting-around that. Not a lot of options close by, either.
So what did I come up with?
Why yes, that IS a stack of 2 phone books, a piece of Corningware, and a packet of note cards being used to brace the bottom of a random slab of wood and a broken broom handle.
Frankly, my biggest surprise was that it actually stayed in place for the full hour needed for the glue to dry, and that the cat thundering through the kitchen hadn't set up enough shockwaves to knock the whole thing down.
Also, note to self for next time: get lunch out of the refrigerator BEFORE setting up an incredibly precarious bunch of bracing that needs to stay put for an hour and putting it 2 inches from the refrigerator door. ^^;;;
(FYI, the insurance company estimated 2 years ago that it would cost me $900 to have this actually repaired, by moving all the furniture out, taking down the damaged plaster, refinishing the ceiling, and moving all the furniture back. My cost so far for this project? A few cents for the smears of wood glue I used to reattach the plaster chunk that was coming off, $3.67 for a squeeze tube of popcorn-texture-patcher, and $2 for a sample-size bit of white eggshell paint that I'll slap over the popcorn texture once I've let it cure overnight. Sometimes you don't really want a theater tech major taking a go at it... but decide the savings might well be worth it anyway. :3)