OOC: post-zeruel inner monologue
This is really just here for my benefit.
Where am I?
Misato's apartment. Asuka lives here. Pen-Pen lives here. Misato lives here. I live here.
Home.
We eat together. Use the same bathroom. Watch the same TV. Have the same people visit us. Home. This is what a home is.
Isn't it?
Asuka yells at me and says I'm stupid. Misato lets her do it. It hurts. There's pain. I don't like it. All that's here is pain and hurt.
And all that hurts me is my enemy.
Enemies. An enemy. Enemy.
The Angels are all out enemies. They kill us. So I hurt them. I hurt them and I can't lose. I can't lose because they tell me I can't lose! I pilot because they tell me I pilot! And when I listen, they say nice things. They tell me good luck and good job and they mean it and they like me! They treat me kindly.
But they hurt.
And all that hurts me is my enemy.
I don't understand them. They say all kinds of things that don't make sense. Prog knife, friends, nerve circuits, happiness, sync tests, loneliness. I don't know what those things really are. Why should I care? Why should I? Why should I? WHY SHOULD I?
Enemies, an enemy, enemy, my enemy, the ones that hurt, my enemy, enemyenemy, who is my worst enemy i'll hurt them, my enemy MY ENEMY
FATHER.
He is my enemy! He hurt Touji...he killed Mother...I'll hurt him!
And the others. They hurt me too. They're enemies. ALL OF THEM ARE MY ENEMIES. But I can't hurt them. Then who will be left to talk to me? Who will like me?
who will like me
(please treat me kindly)
Where am I?
Misato's apartment. Asuka lives here. Pen-Pen lives here. Misato lives here. I live here.
Home.
We eat together. Use the same bathroom. Watch the same TV. Have the same people visit us. Home. This is what a home is.
Isn't it?
Asuka yells at me and says I'm stupid. Misato lets her do it. It hurts. There's pain. I don't like it. All that's here is pain and hurt.
And all that hurts me is my enemy.
Enemies. An enemy. Enemy.
The Angels are all out enemies. They kill us. So I hurt them. I hurt them and I can't lose. I can't lose because they tell me I can't lose! I pilot because they tell me I pilot! And when I listen, they say nice things. They tell me good luck and good job and they mean it and they like me! They treat me kindly.
But they hurt.
And all that hurts me is my enemy.
I don't understand them. They say all kinds of things that don't make sense. Prog knife, friends, nerve circuits, happiness, sync tests, loneliness. I don't know what those things really are. Why should I care? Why should I? Why should I? WHY SHOULD I?
Enemies, an enemy, enemy, my enemy, the ones that hurt, my enemy, enemyenemy, who is my worst enemy i'll hurt them, my enemy MY ENEMY
FATHER.
He is my enemy! He hurt Touji...he killed Mother...I'll hurt him!
And the others. They hurt me too. They're enemies. ALL OF THEM ARE MY ENEMIES. But I can't hurt them. Then who will be left to talk to me? Who will like me?
who will like me
(please treat me kindly)