i don't think i'm meant to be happy.

last night i dreamt i went for a wisdom teeth operation.
i wake up from the operation to find that, in addition to pulling the teeth, they had performed a female circumcision on me.
one of the most disturbing dreams i've ever had.
i still feel uneasy.

Wow. It has been almost 6 months since I last posted an update on livejournal ( Read more... )

a lot of crap is happening inside me right now.
fears and maybe a little hope.
i am in love with unreal things and it keeps me feeling alright.

i just need to get through this summer alive.

so, i stayed up all night ( Read more... )

the one fashion designer i constantly look at for inspiration.
the one i sneak into conversations about art.
the one that made us all rethink clothing.
he is dead.


( Read more... )

i haven't written in here for a very long time ( Read more... )

christmas lights on every house. being able to hear snow fall. spending an evening drinking coffee in a truck stop diner. christmas shopping in a quiet mall. watching christmas movies in my parents' living room with my dog sleeping next to me. getting drunk with old friends and riding in the back of pick-up trucks, even if our bodies are cold. ( Read more... )

Sometimes I'm convinced that I'm a 60 year old man trapped in a 22 year old girl's body ( Read more... )

i've had a long week. papers, exams, presentations to important people, 12 hour days spent on campus...
it took a lot out of me.
luckily, i'm going to get belligerantly drunk at the Dudenshire tonight.
bring on the holiday cheer.

regards,

Tara