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So interesting things are going on at work...
People's desks are randomly getting cleaned out. The count is up to four.
It's nerve wrecking. I know I'll never find another job at what I make.
This was all dumb luck, provided by Derek, who interviewed me and 'thought I could handle it.'
I'm a little nervous...

So what the heck has been up lately? A lot to be frank... some of it blamed on the holidays, other stuff blamed on my own hamster wheel mind. Good stuff first...Liam is coming on December 2nd! I am excited, and Niki will be able to break out of hospital prison. <33 Her and Brian. Secondly I hate my job more then ever. I've never passionately hated ( Read more... )

     So..I ain't doin so hot. I'm better at writing then I am at talking but right now both seem a little insane.
I can honestly say I've never felt this way before. I mean I was depressed through my teens, but I had a reason to be. Now I just feel like a fucking failure. I have Chris, who in more ways then one is prolly the only reason I'm ( Read more... )

I can't breathe
Or perhaps just the urge to do so has left me.
My last breath damned to whisper a hallow curse.
Dancing along deaf ears,
I bring my knees into my chest
In hopes it will keep my pounding heart in place.
Denial blocks out the sounds
Of cracking ribs and snapping muscles....

If the world could stop spinning for just a moment-
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Now I have a broken heart
To accompany my broke mind.
My fingertips graced-
A frosted window.

I witnessed your snap
Burnt lamp shades,
A smashed TV, a room of witness
Brought by your destruction.

What was that last straw,
My Dear?
Was is panic holding pain
That made you jealous?

Was is love, hating life
That took your faith?
Or life hating faith ( Read more... )

Another one of my friends got fired this morning.
Brian Moore. He was my buddy.
This place fucking sucks.
They just suck the fucking life out of everyone and toss out the corpse.

    Since this journal is fairly private I'm going to rant...
Because I am so sick of almost every aspect of my life.
My house
My Car
My Health
And most of all...my fucking job.
Seriously.

Fucking. Fed. Up.

I can't even rant.
Goddamn!

Have You Ever...Have you ever seen or experienced any life altering events?Yes, I have, there's nothing like having your hero try to strangle you to death. It just tops it all off when said person is your father.Have you ever been scared for your life?Ever since I found out I'm diabetic, my pancreas is slowly failing, and that my memory is failing. ( Read more... )

a. having a bad day and think it could make it worse ( Read more... )