hahahahah
I just found this gem from 2003 in my lj and thought I'd share. I amuse me so much.
Cle us69: Poo
MorbidOrthodox: Monkey where?
Cle us69: I didn't do it George. Really. It was the one eyed man(walrus)
MorbidOrthodox: Damn It, I told you to watch for the herd of green beans!
MorbidOrthodox: -stab stab-
Cle us69: Fucking gheep monsters....Always stealin' my rascally wabbits.
MorbidOrthodox: Shhh, Im huntin wabbit
Cle us69: And if it's wet and it quivers a bit when you touch it, watch out. It might be a trap. Lord knows what happened when I stuck my fingers inthere.
MorbidOrthodox: It might tighten up and then you'll never get them back, until the hundred year eruption happens to blow over
Cle us69: Or...it might have teeth.
Cle us69: The horror....the horror.
Cle us69: I'll never look at them the same way again....
MorbidOrthodox: -hides-
Cle us69: So now I use dummy fingers. Checkin' for teeth.
MorbidOrthodox: Do they notice? The teeth? Do they ever notice?!
Cle us69: Sometimes. And I feel luckier for it. i've still got ten fingers left. But I REALLY miss the other three.
MorbidOrthodox: I Just had to eat them, I said I was sorry
Cle us69: It was YOOUUUUUUU!!!!!! Horrible sucubus bitch from hell with the gaping maw of death in your vagina!!!! It was YOUUUU Not the one eyed man.
Cle us69: I should have thought htat was odd...A one eyed man with a tooth filled vagina.
Cle us69: Damn you!!! I want them back.
MorbidOrthodox: Never!!!!!!!
Cle us69: I need them for when I diddle myself in the dark.
Cle us69: Those were the fingers I held the cheese curd with.
MorbidOrthodox: Hah, Find a toothbrush and have fun you foul demon!
MorbidOrthodox: Well now you'll Just have to use some toes, WONT YOU?!
Cle us69: Damn it! It's just not the same without the cheese curd. I tried doing it with my toes, but it didn't work. Kept getting mixed up with toe jam and ass juice.
MorbidOrthodox: Like you dont have a hearty meal of that each day anyway?
MorbidOrthodox: Wake up and smell the cunt crabs!
Cle us69: But that's not the same. You don't diddle yourself with STEAK do you.
Cle us69: Well...except on tuesdays...but that's different.
MorbidOrthodox: I do If I feel like It!
MorbidOrthodox: Tuesdays? Bitch I moved up to Tuesdays and Thursdays!
Cle us69: Yeah. OF course the teeth would like a meal of steak more often. Tired of eatin' just fingers....
MorbidOrthodox: They've eaten more than fingers, Try looking for your spleen!
Cle us69: Didn't need that anyways. I always thought it was more fun to use a jar of apple sauce and green beans.
MorbidOrthodox: I wondered why that apple sauce was a tad bit purple
MorbidOrthodox: It tasted good though
Cle us69: And then using the residue to marinate the chicken, you turn it twice and let it slowly cook for three days.
Cle us69: And THAT's how you make children.
Cle us69: Poo
MorbidOrthodox: Monkey where?
Cle us69: I didn't do it George. Really. It was the one eyed man(walrus)
MorbidOrthodox: Damn It, I told you to watch for the herd of green beans!
MorbidOrthodox: -stab stab-
Cle us69: Fucking gheep monsters....Always stealin' my rascally wabbits.
MorbidOrthodox: Shhh, Im huntin wabbit
Cle us69: And if it's wet and it quivers a bit when you touch it, watch out. It might be a trap. Lord knows what happened when I stuck my fingers inthere.
MorbidOrthodox: It might tighten up and then you'll never get them back, until the hundred year eruption happens to blow over
Cle us69: Or...it might have teeth.
Cle us69: The horror....the horror.
Cle us69: I'll never look at them the same way again....
MorbidOrthodox: -hides-
Cle us69: So now I use dummy fingers. Checkin' for teeth.
MorbidOrthodox: Do they notice? The teeth? Do they ever notice?!
Cle us69: Sometimes. And I feel luckier for it. i've still got ten fingers left. But I REALLY miss the other three.
MorbidOrthodox: I Just had to eat them, I said I was sorry
Cle us69: It was YOOUUUUUUU!!!!!! Horrible sucubus bitch from hell with the gaping maw of death in your vagina!!!! It was YOUUUU Not the one eyed man.
Cle us69: I should have thought htat was odd...A one eyed man with a tooth filled vagina.
Cle us69: Damn you!!! I want them back.
MorbidOrthodox: Never!!!!!!!
Cle us69: I need them for when I diddle myself in the dark.
Cle us69: Those were the fingers I held the cheese curd with.
MorbidOrthodox: Hah, Find a toothbrush and have fun you foul demon!
MorbidOrthodox: Well now you'll Just have to use some toes, WONT YOU?!
Cle us69: Damn it! It's just not the same without the cheese curd. I tried doing it with my toes, but it didn't work. Kept getting mixed up with toe jam and ass juice.
MorbidOrthodox: Like you dont have a hearty meal of that each day anyway?
MorbidOrthodox: Wake up and smell the cunt crabs!
Cle us69: But that's not the same. You don't diddle yourself with STEAK do you.
Cle us69: Well...except on tuesdays...but that's different.
MorbidOrthodox: I do If I feel like It!
MorbidOrthodox: Tuesdays? Bitch I moved up to Tuesdays and Thursdays!
Cle us69: Yeah. OF course the teeth would like a meal of steak more often. Tired of eatin' just fingers....
MorbidOrthodox: They've eaten more than fingers, Try looking for your spleen!
Cle us69: Didn't need that anyways. I always thought it was more fun to use a jar of apple sauce and green beans.
MorbidOrthodox: I wondered why that apple sauce was a tad bit purple
MorbidOrthodox: It tasted good though
Cle us69: And then using the residue to marinate the chicken, you turn it twice and let it slowly cook for three days.
Cle us69: And THAT's how you make children.