0545
written just before my flight to hong kong for a school trip.
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morning flights are probably the worst. you're waking up at 3 am and really, you should have slept earlier because you're tired as hell. then again, it's not your fault you went to bed at 10 pm and ended up falling asleep at 1 am. and then you're on your way to the airport with your dad, brain too clouded to function properly until you're nearing the doors of the airport and you realise that shit, your family isn't going with you like they always do. this is a school trip and you think you're not alone, but that's not exactly the case when you barely know anyone else going for the trip. it's when you step into the airport that you think about all the things separating you from your family: roads, trees, so much goddamn space and an overseas school trip - the only thing you share is the sky.
suddenly, the tears are falling hard and fast; nobody else is crying except you and you've never felt so alone until now. nobody's awake at 6 am in the morning. the wifi is unavailable but who cares about that when you don't even have anyone to send a whatsapp message to? soon it'll be seas and borders and 1594 miles between you and your home country; the distance is overwhelming and the tears are threatening to fall again but you're already seated in the plane. of course, you know you can't just get off and go home but right now, all you want is to do just that. go home. stop feeling alone and trapped. get away from schoolmates you barely even know.
but you can't.
-
morning flights are probably the worst. you're waking up at 3 am and really, you should have slept earlier because you're tired as hell. then again, it's not your fault you went to bed at 10 pm and ended up falling asleep at 1 am. and then you're on your way to the airport with your dad, brain too clouded to function properly until you're nearing the doors of the airport and you realise that shit, your family isn't going with you like they always do. this is a school trip and you think you're not alone, but that's not exactly the case when you barely know anyone else going for the trip. it's when you step into the airport that you think about all the things separating you from your family: roads, trees, so much goddamn space and an overseas school trip - the only thing you share is the sky.
suddenly, the tears are falling hard and fast; nobody else is crying except you and you've never felt so alone until now. nobody's awake at 6 am in the morning. the wifi is unavailable but who cares about that when you don't even have anyone to send a whatsapp message to? soon it'll be seas and borders and 1594 miles between you and your home country; the distance is overwhelming and the tears are threatening to fall again but you're already seated in the plane. of course, you know you can't just get off and go home but right now, all you want is to do just that. go home. stop feeling alone and trapped. get away from schoolmates you barely even know.
but you can't.