The Listening (Jonghyun/Onew, Onew/Taeyeon)
The Listening
platonic!Jonghyun/Onew, Onew/Taeyeon
G; starts with slight angst, band bonding, fluff in the end.
Jinki teaches Jonghyun how to listen and they come to an understanding.
Jinki just has that way with people.
He’s the one that other singers rush to greet, gracing each and everyone with his bright smile while making small talk that is polite and personal at the same time. He’s the one who managers talk to solemnly shows and schedules and doing lunch and other business-y things like that. He’s the one with the infinite memory for birthdays and anniversaries of staff and singers alike, always popping up with a flower or chocolate before rushing back to whatever the schedule is. And he is quite possibly the only singer in all of South Korea who still writes handwritten notes of thanks to almost every single person they encounter- shop owners, cameramen, directors, the list goes on.
Whatever that is, it’s a gift. You know because you’ve finally figured out that you just might be the teensiest bit jealous when stars that you can’t quite talk to yet rush up to Jinki and talk so easily to him. Because for all your singing and dancing talent, stardom is a lonely place- but it doesn’t seem that way for him. People are just attracted to him naturally like flowers to the sun, and they always fall just a little bit in love with him. It’s so easy to- and once in a while it lasts.
So it doesn’t come as too much of a surprise, when the doorbell rings one day and Taeyeon shows up, lips pressed in a tight line and staring down at her feet. Then Jinki comes up from behind you and before you even realize what’s happening, she’s behind you in his arms and he’s murmuring all soft and reassuring into her hair. Your eyes meet over her head and he mouths close the door. Gently guiding her into the bedroom, he slides the door shut with a click and they disappear.
You feel a strange emptiness somewhere between your heart and stomach and it doesn’t disappear as you walk into the kitchen. Kibum-ah, Taeyeon-noona’s here and probably staying for dinner. That voice doesn’t sound like yours; it’s flat and strangely devoid of emotion and wavered slightly at the end. Ah, okay, he hands a carrot over to you, gesturing to the knife on the chopping board. Turning back to the steaming pot on the stovetop, he asks, Why’s she here anyway?. He pauses, waiting for your answer. Misinterpreting your pause, he continues, It’s not dinner, there’s more than enough for six of us anyway, noona doesn’t eat much. But isn’t their schedule even more packed than ours?
You wait until you’re sure your voice is capable of sounding normal. Not sure. Now you concentrate on slicing the carrot into paper thin slices. If you can only take the longest time possible to chop it up, you’re sure that Jinki and Taeyeon will be out before you’re done. Jinki’s talking to her in the bedroom. Kibum’s still facing the pot, but you can still hear the smile on his face when he says, Hyung’s good at that, huh? Don’t you think we’re lucky to have him as leader?
Yeah, you gulp, focussing on the way the light refracts off the blade of the knife. Then you realize that the carrot is precisely the same shade as Taeyeon’s t-shirt, and a hot wave of guilt inexplicably runs over you when you realize that the void in your stomach had been resentment. Resentment that he’s the one she is crying to, that he knows exactly what she is going through, that he has enough of her trust for her to turn up here tonight just like that. Abruptly, you turn from the counter. I’m going to call the kids for dinner.
Okay. You barely hear his reply; you’re already out of the kitchen and in the hallway. Fully intending to walk straight past the bedroom to the workroom where Taemin and Minho must be, you notice that the door is open a crack. Jinki and Taeyeon need to eat too, you think stubbornly, against your better reason. Our leaders are only human too. You pause, hand hovering over the doorknob unsure of what to do, then you hear Jinki’s voice. Come in, Jonghyun-ah, but be quiet.
There’s a genuine ache in your chest when you see Taeyeon fast asleep in his arms, tear tracks still visible on her pale face. Not because she’s the one being hugged by him and not you, not anymore. But you’re suddenly remembering singing lessons and running up and down together on scales and staircases alike. She was- she is your friend. So you ignore their tangled fingers, the way his free hand is still buried in her hair, and how his favourite shirt is bunching over her frame. And you sit down beside him.
What happened? He smiles- not in that wide open way where you can see all his teeth- this one is gentle and uncertain and his eyes manage to stay sad while the corners of his lips quirk up. She feels like she let down her group. A tender look you’ve never seen before flashes across his face when he looks down at her sleeping form, slowly turning back into the sad smile from before. Like she’s let them all down.
All the guilt and resentment and jealousy disappears in that moment, forgotten because of the incredulity of the statement. But, but, From his amused expression, you’re sure your jaw is hanging down in that characteristic way of yours. Taeyeon noona is…is…they would never be disappointed in her. They love her. Like we love you, you want to add. Like we love you.
I know. I tried telling her that. He drops his head to look at her again, so you can’t see his face anymore. But the sadness doesn’t go away just like that, Hyun-ah. Sometimes you can’t make it go away. So you just cry and sometimes it feels better. There’s a tightness in his voice that you can’t identify. Sometimes it doesn’t.
You try to laugh light-heartedly, but find that you can’t, so you continue anyway. Are you talking about her or yourself, you crybaby, Jinki-ah? He doesn’t reply, but his body tenses in the same way it does after he comes off the stage when he’s made a mistake. The two of you stay like that for a while, in silence next to each other on his bed before Taeyeon mumbles something in her sleep and turns a little in his arms. The tension in his limbs melts away as he loosens the buttons on his shirt, re-arranging the folds of fabric around her. You know, Hyun, I’ve always been jealous of you. How you can just blurt out your thoughts, talk to people so easily and not mind what they think or say of you. You open your mouth to challenge the ridiculousness of this statement when his arms tighten around her and you know he’s speaking the truth. All I do is listen.
Looking at him holding her and so afraid, so honest- saying the right thing has never been easier. Well, that’s what you just did for her, right? You swallow, and continue. And it looks like that’s exactly what she needed.
He looks up quickly and his surprised face makes you smile. Then he smiles and this time his eyes sparkle a bit and smile along too. And that’s what you just did for me. His voice drops a little and the smile is a little less wide but no less sincere. Thanks.
Suddenly, the room seems a little bit more in focus and you can think clearly again. And you can see how how tired Jinki is and you don’t feel anything but a soft warmness when you look at Taeyeon in his lap. Anyways, hyung, you get up and head towards the door. Dinner’s ready now. Come out soon, okay? You look like you could use some food. Noona too. Before leaving the room, you turn around and just catch his smile as he looks down at her. Yeah, she could.
You make your way into the kitchen, ignoring Kibum’s where were yous and instead accept the cutlery he shoves into your hands. Afterwards, you inspect your handiwork and the table looks just fine with six places instead of five.
Where’s hyung? Taemin asks, skidding into the kitchen and crashing into his chair. Minho follows at a slightly more dignified pace and sits down without rattling every dish at the table. Taking the ladle, you pour the soup into bowls. He’ll be here soon. Taeyeon noona too.
Really? Taemin asks excitedly as Key enters with a platter of something delicious smelling and slaps away Minho’s hand. When did she get here? How soon?
Right about now. Jinki’s smooth voice cuts through the pre-dinner din, and you turn to see him standing in the doorway with Taeyeon, and you’re pretty sure you’re also the only one who can see his hand resting lightly on her hip. Oh you’re so thin, she says mournfully, rushing forward to hug Taemin And you’ve grown again! (You’re thin too noona. But you haven’t grown. Shut up, brat!)
Then Taemin spazzes and Minho actually starts a conversation and Key brings in her favourite dessert, and Jinki’s eyes meet yours. Thanks, he mouths over the noise as he sits down beside Taeyeon who is now bickering with Taemin.
Today, being able to listen sometimes feels better than being listened to. No, thank you, hyung.
Posted previously at shinee_replay.
platonic!Jonghyun/Onew, Onew/Taeyeon
G; starts with slight angst, band bonding, fluff in the end.
Jinki teaches Jonghyun how to listen and they come to an understanding.
Jinki just has that way with people.
He’s the one that other singers rush to greet, gracing each and everyone with his bright smile while making small talk that is polite and personal at the same time. He’s the one who managers talk to solemnly shows and schedules and doing lunch and other business-y things like that. He’s the one with the infinite memory for birthdays and anniversaries of staff and singers alike, always popping up with a flower or chocolate before rushing back to whatever the schedule is. And he is quite possibly the only singer in all of South Korea who still writes handwritten notes of thanks to almost every single person they encounter- shop owners, cameramen, directors, the list goes on.
Whatever that is, it’s a gift. You know because you’ve finally figured out that you just might be the teensiest bit jealous when stars that you can’t quite talk to yet rush up to Jinki and talk so easily to him. Because for all your singing and dancing talent, stardom is a lonely place- but it doesn’t seem that way for him. People are just attracted to him naturally like flowers to the sun, and they always fall just a little bit in love with him. It’s so easy to- and once in a while it lasts.
So it doesn’t come as too much of a surprise, when the doorbell rings one day and Taeyeon shows up, lips pressed in a tight line and staring down at her feet. Then Jinki comes up from behind you and before you even realize what’s happening, she’s behind you in his arms and he’s murmuring all soft and reassuring into her hair. Your eyes meet over her head and he mouths close the door. Gently guiding her into the bedroom, he slides the door shut with a click and they disappear.
You feel a strange emptiness somewhere between your heart and stomach and it doesn’t disappear as you walk into the kitchen. Kibum-ah, Taeyeon-noona’s here and probably staying for dinner. That voice doesn’t sound like yours; it’s flat and strangely devoid of emotion and wavered slightly at the end. Ah, okay, he hands a carrot over to you, gesturing to the knife on the chopping board. Turning back to the steaming pot on the stovetop, he asks, Why’s she here anyway?. He pauses, waiting for your answer. Misinterpreting your pause, he continues, It’s not dinner, there’s more than enough for six of us anyway, noona doesn’t eat much. But isn’t their schedule even more packed than ours?
You wait until you’re sure your voice is capable of sounding normal. Not sure. Now you concentrate on slicing the carrot into paper thin slices. If you can only take the longest time possible to chop it up, you’re sure that Jinki and Taeyeon will be out before you’re done. Jinki’s talking to her in the bedroom. Kibum’s still facing the pot, but you can still hear the smile on his face when he says, Hyung’s good at that, huh? Don’t you think we’re lucky to have him as leader?
Yeah, you gulp, focussing on the way the light refracts off the blade of the knife. Then you realize that the carrot is precisely the same shade as Taeyeon’s t-shirt, and a hot wave of guilt inexplicably runs over you when you realize that the void in your stomach had been resentment. Resentment that he’s the one she is crying to, that he knows exactly what she is going through, that he has enough of her trust for her to turn up here tonight just like that. Abruptly, you turn from the counter. I’m going to call the kids for dinner.
Okay. You barely hear his reply; you’re already out of the kitchen and in the hallway. Fully intending to walk straight past the bedroom to the workroom where Taemin and Minho must be, you notice that the door is open a crack. Jinki and Taeyeon need to eat too, you think stubbornly, against your better reason. Our leaders are only human too. You pause, hand hovering over the doorknob unsure of what to do, then you hear Jinki’s voice. Come in, Jonghyun-ah, but be quiet.
There’s a genuine ache in your chest when you see Taeyeon fast asleep in his arms, tear tracks still visible on her pale face. Not because she’s the one being hugged by him and not you, not anymore. But you’re suddenly remembering singing lessons and running up and down together on scales and staircases alike. She was- she is your friend. So you ignore their tangled fingers, the way his free hand is still buried in her hair, and how his favourite shirt is bunching over her frame. And you sit down beside him.
What happened? He smiles- not in that wide open way where you can see all his teeth- this one is gentle and uncertain and his eyes manage to stay sad while the corners of his lips quirk up. She feels like she let down her group. A tender look you’ve never seen before flashes across his face when he looks down at her sleeping form, slowly turning back into the sad smile from before. Like she’s let them all down.
All the guilt and resentment and jealousy disappears in that moment, forgotten because of the incredulity of the statement. But, but, From his amused expression, you’re sure your jaw is hanging down in that characteristic way of yours. Taeyeon noona is…is…they would never be disappointed in her. They love her. Like we love you, you want to add. Like we love you.
I know. I tried telling her that. He drops his head to look at her again, so you can’t see his face anymore. But the sadness doesn’t go away just like that, Hyun-ah. Sometimes you can’t make it go away. So you just cry and sometimes it feels better. There’s a tightness in his voice that you can’t identify. Sometimes it doesn’t.
You try to laugh light-heartedly, but find that you can’t, so you continue anyway. Are you talking about her or yourself, you crybaby, Jinki-ah? He doesn’t reply, but his body tenses in the same way it does after he comes off the stage when he’s made a mistake. The two of you stay like that for a while, in silence next to each other on his bed before Taeyeon mumbles something in her sleep and turns a little in his arms. The tension in his limbs melts away as he loosens the buttons on his shirt, re-arranging the folds of fabric around her. You know, Hyun, I’ve always been jealous of you. How you can just blurt out your thoughts, talk to people so easily and not mind what they think or say of you. You open your mouth to challenge the ridiculousness of this statement when his arms tighten around her and you know he’s speaking the truth. All I do is listen.
Looking at him holding her and so afraid, so honest- saying the right thing has never been easier. Well, that’s what you just did for her, right? You swallow, and continue. And it looks like that’s exactly what she needed.
He looks up quickly and his surprised face makes you smile. Then he smiles and this time his eyes sparkle a bit and smile along too. And that’s what you just did for me. His voice drops a little and the smile is a little less wide but no less sincere. Thanks.
Suddenly, the room seems a little bit more in focus and you can think clearly again. And you can see how how tired Jinki is and you don’t feel anything but a soft warmness when you look at Taeyeon in his lap. Anyways, hyung, you get up and head towards the door. Dinner’s ready now. Come out soon, okay? You look like you could use some food. Noona too. Before leaving the room, you turn around and just catch his smile as he looks down at her. Yeah, she could.
You make your way into the kitchen, ignoring Kibum’s where were yous and instead accept the cutlery he shoves into your hands. Afterwards, you inspect your handiwork and the table looks just fine with six places instead of five.
Where’s hyung? Taemin asks, skidding into the kitchen and crashing into his chair. Minho follows at a slightly more dignified pace and sits down without rattling every dish at the table. Taking the ladle, you pour the soup into bowls. He’ll be here soon. Taeyeon noona too.
Really? Taemin asks excitedly as Key enters with a platter of something delicious smelling and slaps away Minho’s hand. When did she get here? How soon?
Right about now. Jinki’s smooth voice cuts through the pre-dinner din, and you turn to see him standing in the doorway with Taeyeon, and you’re pretty sure you’re also the only one who can see his hand resting lightly on her hip. Oh you’re so thin, she says mournfully, rushing forward to hug Taemin And you’ve grown again! (You’re thin too noona. But you haven’t grown. Shut up, brat!)
Then Taemin spazzes and Minho actually starts a conversation and Key brings in her favourite dessert, and Jinki’s eyes meet yours. Thanks, he mouths over the noise as he sits down beside Taeyeon who is now bickering with Taemin.
Today, being able to listen sometimes feels better than being listened to. No, thank you, hyung.
Posted previously at shinee_replay.