Fic title: Man in the mirror
Author: cillab42
Genre: Supernatural
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Rating: Nc-17
Word count: 5,123
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they belong to Kripke and Company. I’m just borrowing for a bit of fun.
Warnings: m/m, underage (Sam is 16)
Summary: Dean spends his time chasing after easy conquests to keep his mind off of the one thing he really wants. Sam.
A/N: This is my January entry for
smpc. Thanks to the mods for allowing me a break from last month's lateness. I want to thank the lovely
yonku for her help as beta. Any mistakes found are my own.
Dean was drunk. Okay, not so much drunk as…tipsy (don’t judge). It had been a good night all around. He had hustled $1,500.00 in the local dive before singlehandedly having to fight off the locals without a scar. Bruises don’t count.
Even after all of that he still ended up with the cute waitress with the tongue piercing in addition to his date, Rhonda something.
Despite them being the kinkiest women he has had in the past three states, he was ready to go again. Once the adrenaline rush was gone, he found that his thirst hadn’t been sated.
Quietly, or as quietly as a tipsy Dean could manage, he let himself into the dump that his father had abandoned him and his brother in for the next few days, weeks or months or however long his current hunt might take.
Despite his state, Dean was mindful enough to check the salt lines along the windows and the doors as well as, replacing the one along the door he just entered. After what seemed to be a cursory, but was indeed a thorough check of the sigils on the walls, Dean made his way down the hall to the room he shared with his younger brother, Sam.
The house came furnished, and their dad had given them the room with the bigger bed because there were two of them and they needed the room, but no matter how large the bed was it was never big enough for Dean.
He was always aware of Sam’s movements, even understood his breathing patterns and he knew when Sam was really asleep or merely pretending to be.
Like now.
Instead of calling Sam on it, Dean shrugged off the heavy leather jacket that he commandeered from his father four years ago and placed it on the back of the chair at Sam’s desk.
There was no such care when he shucked out of his clothes and left them on the floor where they fell. His feet didn’t make a sound as he padded across the room, dressed only in black boxer briefs, and crawled into the large bed beside Sam.
The thing about being …tipsy, was that even though you were still in control, there was still the urge to say fuck it, and give into things that you know were wrong. Things like curling into Sam’s body and fuck him until he couldn’t walk straight.
“You stink of booze and sex, so if you’re not going to shower, then sleep in dads bed or on the sofa,” came the bitchy voice from underneath the thin blanket dad purchased from Goodwill.
“Ah, there’s the Sam I know and love,” Dean snarked in response.
He really hadn’t expected anything less from his sixteen year old brother, whom despite his current foul mood Dean was regarded as sex on legs. He often came home from drinking and fucking, hoping to get a rise from his saintly little brother. Clinging as always, to the hope that tonight would be the night that Sam said that he wanted Dean too.
At first, he reasoned that it was because he liked pissing Sam off, but somewhere between Texas and Montana, he realized that he couldn’t pretend that the disgusted look on Sam face’s was jealously and not well, disgust.
“No one wants to smell your second hand stench of your night spent screwing some stupid girl.” Sam ground out.
“You know, you’d probably be less bitchy if you went out and got what you wanted instead of spending all of your free time with Mrs. Palmer and her five daughters. I promise you it’s so much better when someone else does the touching.”
Sam mumbled something back at him, but Dean didn’t have the energy or the desire for round two, when all he really wanted to do was crawl up behind Sam and fall asleep.
He’d hoped that the girl with the piercing and the talented tongue would have taken care of the longing and the wanting, but she didn’t. Not even a reprieve, because all it took was the sound of Sam’s voice and he was hard.
The only way he was going to get any semblance of rest was to give them both what they needed, so he headed towards the ensuite bathroom for a shower and to jerk off.
Once there he removed his boxers and looked at himself in the mirror. Not to brag, but despite the scars, he wasn’t a bad looking guy. There are women (maybe even a guy or two) that would agree with that.
This was what he didn’t understand. He had no shortage of partners, women threw themselves at him and even though men had as well, he was holding out for Sam on that front. Why did he feel this way for his brother? Wasn’t his life fucked up enough?
Perhaps not, but as much as he tried, he couldn’t get past wanting to lick Sam’s dimples while he fucked him. Perhaps tomorrow night he needed to actually get drunk enough to try a boy, because this - this had to stop.
Dean moved from the mirror and turned the shower on and adjusted the temperature before stepping under the hot spray. As the hot water touched heated skin all Dean could thing about was Sam, dimples, and fucking, the thoughts only served to make him harder.
Giving up all pretense, Dean leaned forward and turned the water away from him, placed his left hand on the tiled wall in front of him for leverage, and began to stroke his aching cock with his right hand.
He had barely completed one full stroke when the bathroom door flew open and he was slammed against the wet tile.
∞∞∞∞∞∞
Sam lay there and listened as Dean stumbled in. Even though the frequency had increased lately, and Dean didn’t flaunt it in his face, he was very aware of every time his brother hooked up with someone. By now, Sam should be used to his brother whoring around, but, because he was in love with the man, it was easy to notice that he was fucking everyone but him.
For some reason tonight was worse. Dean came in smelling like beer and sex and to top it all off, as Dean took off his coat, a pair of red lace panties fell from his brother’s pocket.
Dean’s date tonight was a classmate of Sam’s named Rhonda Hurley. The petite brunette was a senior, whom Sam had been tutoring in math, to help her get a passing grade, in order to graduate with her class. She had taken one look at Dean and her interest went from equations to sex education.
As he lay there and listen to Dean had out unwanted advice about getting his needs taken care of, Sam became even more furious and his vision became as red as the lace that had fallen from Dean’s pocket.
Despite his anger, Sam was attuned to his brothers every movement and when he went into the adjoining bathroom, and the water running. Squeezing his eyes closed, he could imagine water running over freckled skin and touching, all of the secret places that Sam longed to.
Fuck it!
He and his dad never got along, he was never praised as Dean had been and never excelled in anything as far as John Winchester was concerned, and that was his talent as a researcher. When these abnormal feelings for his brother first surfaced Sam did his research.
There wasn’t a lot, but it was enough to support his theory that he wasn’t alone. From there his research took a different turn and searched gay love. Unlike Dean, he hadn’t let anyone touch him, how else could he, they weren’t Dean.
What he had done was fantasized.
He thought that he’d like to fuck Dean, have his big brother begging him, but then he found his prostate and that was all he could think about, being on his knees for his big brother as he was pounded from behind. The sound of running water spurred him into action; before he could think it through, Sam had thrown the covers back, stripped, and was now searching for the lube he kept hidden in the night stand. Soon one, two, and then three of his fingers were buried deep in his ass working it open for Dean.
Still not thinking about his actions, Sam ran across the room and flung the flimsy door open, and stepped over the pile of Dean’s cloths before he jerked the shower curtain back.
Oh, God, Dean was beautiful.
He was leaned forward with one hand on the wall in front of him and the other curled around his cock. His head was down and hot water was rolling down his back, making his pale skin - to redden - from the heat.
“Fuck Sam, can I get a little privacy?”
Sam let his eyes travel down Dean’s naked wet back as he took in the plethora of freckled skin. The well-developed muscles on his back, rippled at Den’s every movement, and Sam let his eyes travel down until they met the pair of firm globes of Dean’s ass.
As beautiful as that was Sam wanted to see it all, especially the part that Dean’s hand was wrapped around.
“She must not have been that good if you had to come back here to get yourself off,” Sam taunted the older man.
“What do you want Sam?” Dean wailed, before turning his head to look at his brother and taking in his nakedness. “What are you doing, Sam? He asked. “Don’t,” he whispered, fervently as Sam stepped forward.
“You said get what I want, well this is what I want, Dean, you”
Dean was speaking that much was clear because his lips were moving. Sam was aware of that because he was catching them very closely. He knew that where ever Dean went there were always admirers ; all his older brother had to do was crook his finger and he’d have a partner the night or whatever the duration he was looking for.
He’d heard the men talk about Dean’s cock-sucking lips, and although he wouldn’t turn it down, that was not where his mind wandered when he looked at Dean’s mouth. He wanted to know if they were as soft as they looked. Tonight, he would have the answer to his question. Ignoring Dean’s minimal protest, Sam stepped inside the tub and under the spray of water.
He’d really expected Dean to put up a harder fight, but he didn’t.
“I tried.” he said with a pained look on his face, “I tried so hard to fight this, but I can’t fight you too Sam.”
“Then don’t,” Sam advised before leaning down to taste the sinful lips that had been taunting him since he knew what his dick was for. “I surrendered a long time ago, you just took a while to realize it.”
He relished the thought that he hadn’t been alone in feeling this, that Dean had been fighting it as well. The look on his face was a tortured one and Sam never wanted to think of what they felt for one another as pain.
“Gonna be okay,” He promised, as he placed a soft, reassuring, kiss on Dean’s mouth. Those lips! God, they were as soft-no softer that he’d ever imagined. As that water beat down on his back, he felt every spray, as his skin became mare sensitive, and he became more turned on as he was finally able to give in to tasting Dean.
“Sam,” Dean said, as though he was offering up a token protest.
Not wanting Dean to go back into his protective big brother mode, Sam released his brother for a second and turned to turn the water off. As he faced Dean again, he took one of the older man’s hands in his and brought it around until it was resting on his ass.
Slowly, he took one of Dean’s fingers and slid it into his lubed ass and leaned forward and whispered, “Other than mine, yours is the only finger that’s been inside me. When your dick splits me open, it will be the only one I’ll have ever had. Only one I’ll ever have.”
At his words, Dean moaned as though it was his ass being fingered.
“Please, Sam,” Dean begged.
“Please what Dean? Please get on my hands and knees with my ass up in the air? Or is it please lay on your back and spread your legs wide enough for me to crawl in between? Which is it Dean, because I’m okay with either.”
“On your back, Sam, on your back, I need to see your face, need to know that I really have you.” Dean answered letting Sam know that he’d given up on the miniscule protest.
As though to drive the point home, Dean crooked his finger a little to the left and found that small bundle of nerves and made Sam’s knees buckle.
Sam protested as he felt Deans finger slowly slide from him, and almost cried when he saw
Dean step from the tub. Now it was him begging, “Dean, Please…”
“Oh, I will,” Dean promised as some of his cockiness returned, “but it won’t be in this shower. I want you spread out under me and do all the things I’ve only ever imagined I’d get the chance to do.”
Once out of the tub, Dean reached out his hand to Sam and helped him and his shaky legs clear the porcelain. Instead of heading towards the door, Sam watched as Dean grabbed one of the thread bare towels and began to dry his body as he had when they were kids.
“I wish that this was Egyptian cotton and the sheets were a gazillion tread count, because you deserve nothing less, but this is all I have to give you Sam, me.”
Forcing his mouth to work, Sam reassured Dean, “You’re all I need.”
“Good, I wanna dry you first, because the only wet spot I want in the bed is the one we make.”
Dean moved behind him and began to sensually rub the towel across Sam’s back. Sam blushed as he thought about the differences in their bodies. Sam was tall and lanky, thanks to their Dad’s rigorous training schedule, his body was beginning to develop muscle, but Dean was a different story.
Dean had perfect and lithe all sinew and muscle. Even though, they were now both the same height, Dean’s body was powerful and strong, and Sam wanted him to use it on him. He wanted to be held down, the way he did when they were wrestling, and this time instead of crying uncle, he’d be crying Dean.
Sam felt his skin grow hot and tight as Dean slowly found every drop of moisture between his shoulder blades and the crack of his ass. He was silently pleading with Dean to use his fingers on him again, when he was spun around to face his brother’s lustful gaze.
“So fucking beautiful Sam,’ Dean praised and he glanced down at Sam’s straining dick. “I’m not sure which I like the best, that beautiful pink hole that you saved for me or, this large cock, that’s leaking and twitching for me.”
Taking the towel, Dean began to dry Sam’s body, dipping into the hollow of his clavicle, and with slow deliberate movements, and when he got to his nipples, the sensation of the rough cloth and the sensitivity from being so turned on made his dick twitch even harder and dribble more precome.
Sam was having a hard time trying not to come, but it seemed that Dean, armed with the rough towel was determined to make him spill his load before he got to the good part.
The towel was moved lower onto his stomach, and grazing his cockhead. The sensation from both made the bottom of Sam’s stomach to drop out and made him feel as though his feet were no longer touching the ground.
As if that wasn’t enough, Dean, leaned forward and whispered, “Bet if I touch you now you’ll come all over yourself, won’t you Sammy?”
His throat tightened up for a second, temporarily, robbing Sam of the ability to speak. When he did find his voice all he could do was croak out a “no.”
Sam knew that he probably would come, but he didn’t want Dean to think that he was dealing with a baby, that he could measure up to all of those who had come before him.
“Let’s test that theory, “Dean teased as he went down on his knees in front of his brother.
Sam braced himself for the first feel of Dean’s mouth on him, but the son of a bitch took the towel and began to dry his legs. He was disappointed, but he had to admit that it felt good.
Dean started at Sam’s ankles and worked his way up, and when he got to Sam’s thighs, he kneaded the burgeoning muscles.
“Soon, you’re gonna fill out, and be bigger than me someday,” Dean predicted, “Are you gonna let me hold you down and fuck you hard then?”
“Can do it now, Dean,” Sam told him, taking a deep breath, as he reached back to find something solid to rest against, since his knees felt as though they were going to give out at any moment. He found purchase on the bathroom door, spread his legs and begged, “Touch me, Dean. Please, touch me!”
Never one to deny his little brother anything, Dean leaned forward, and took as much of Sam’s length into his mouth, until it hit the back of his throat.
Just as Dean predicted, Sam came almost as soon as Dean’s warm mouth closed around him.
There was no research in the world that could prepare him for having all of his dreams come true. No picture or video could prepare him for the sensations of being engulfed in that heat.
He was only about half way in Dean’s mouth and he fought the desire to rock his hips forward and bury himself in his brother’s throat. Sam was able to stop himself from thrusting forward but he couldn’t will himself not to come, and his orgasm felt so, that he didn’t even feel guilty that Dean was choking on his release.
Sam was trying to catch his breath, when Dean stood up, and placed his mouth over his and stole it away again.
As though sensing Sam’s need for air, Dean broke the kiss before lunging back in and slipping his tongue inside Sam’s mouth along with the come he’d been holding.
“You taste good, Sammy,” Dean told the younger boy and he licked his lips to break the string of spit and come that still connected them.
∞∞∞∞∞
Dean stepped away from Sam and looked at his handiwork, the boy looked wrecked and they hadn’t even fucked yet. He’d been dreaming about getting inside Sam since he first heard him, trying to jack off in the bed next to him, three years ago. At first, he thought it was cute and the hard on he got was because he, himself, needed to get laid.
That was the lie he told himself.
The second and third time he wanted to jack him off himself, but he knew that the young boys was shy and he was sick for wanting to touch his baby brother like that. Now here they were three years later and he had the taste of Sam’s come in his mouth and he was leading him to the bed to bury himself deep inside the younger man’s body.
Dean pulled the covers back and watched, as a suddenly nervous Sam, climbed onto the bed closest to the bathroom door.
Mimicking Sam’s earlier sentiment, Dean, thought Oh God, he was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen, as he stared at Sam, who lay there spread out for him like the best fucking Christmas present ever. Dean couldn’t help it, he was mesmerized and just continued to stare at Sam. The longer he stared, the redder his skin became and the harder his dick became under Dean’s scrutiny.
“Dean?” Sam questioned in a voice that was soft and unsure. He chewed his bottom lip and nervously reached for his brother with visibly shaking hands.
The uncertainty in Sam’s voice broke through Dean’s trance, and he walked closer to the bed and took his brothers hand as he joined him on the bed.
“Thought that you had changed your mind,” Sam said in that same voice, “maybe you wanted someone with more experience.”
“Sam Winchester,” Dean growled and he quickly straddled his brothers hips and ignored both the gasp from Sam and the spike of pleasure as the movement caused their cocks to rub together. “The gift you’ve bestowed on me…it’s priceless, it’s something I don’t deserve, but I’m selfish and am going to take what’s offered. Now no more of that or we’re both gonna grow pussies from all of the feelings that are floating around the room and I really don’t want that to happen, because I really wanna fuck you right now.”
Sam’s answer was to spread his legs and canting up his hips to give Dean more room and more friction; and Dean groaned again.
Moving forward and placed another kiss on Sam’s tempting lips, before reluctantly moving off the bed and head towards the desk where his clothes lay.
“No, Dean, “Sam protested as Dean walked the short distance, “I can do better.”
“If you do it will kill me, Sam,” Dean grinned at his brother and held up a small foil packet. “I just needed to get this before I completely lost my head.”
“We don’t need that, Dean.”
“Yeah-we do,” Dean disagreed. “While you were patient, I wasn’t. But I never went without protection. I’ll get tested before I ever think of having you without protection.”
“May I put it on you?” Sam offered shyly.
Dean shivered at the thought, but shook his head and expertly ripped open the packet with his teeth, “If you touch me right now, I will come before I get to have you. Next time, Sam, next time.”
Once Dean sheathed himself, he crawled back up Sam’s body.
“I had all of these fantasies about what I would do to you if I ever got you here. I wanted to play with your nipples, to see how sensitive they were; I wanted to rim you, and see just what your kink level was, but now that I have my chance, I’m too impatient.”
“You act as though this is only going to be a one-time thing,” Sam accused. “Don’t give me this and then take it away.”
“I’m not strong enough to walk away from you Sam.” Dean admitted as he leaned forward to taste the skin behind Sam’s ear that he’d spent the better part of the last year wanting.
“Gonna mark you, Sam” he advised the boy as he bit and licked the spot until it showed promise of a bruise, “gonna let those fucking girls that hang on you know that you’re taken and they can’t touch.”
“Dean,’ “Sam whined as he bore his neck to Dean’s hungry mouth, “I don’t want them, never wanted anyone, but you.”
“You may not have wanted, but they did. Each time I pick you up those little bitches are all over you.”
Dean knew he was being harsh in his description, but days, months, and years of watching the girl’s touch Sam when he couldn’t made him a little bitter.
“If I could, I’d stand on top of the Impala and shout it to the fucking world that you were mine, but this will have to do.”
“You know if you just fuck me, every time I move I’ll know I’m yours,” Sam told him in a voice rife with frustration.
Dean gave a low chuckle at Sam’s demand and gave the sensitive skin another gentle bite, before he positioned Sam’s legs obscenely wide. Dean found that he liked that Sam readied himself for him, but the next time he wanted to see it, wanted to watch, as those long fingers made way for his cock.
Sam’s, “Next time Dean,” told him that he had spoken aloud.
Dean watched as he positioned the younger man’s body for entry. The emotions there warred between a man’s hunger and a boy’s fear. Dean was glad that the hunger won out and Sam helped by canting his hips, making it easier to line his cock up to Sam’s entrance.
Dean watched in awe as the head of his cock, slipped past the tight ring of muscle of Sam’s ass. As quick glance at Sam’s face told him that his entrance was not as pleasurable for his brother.
“Sam we can… Are you sure?,” Dean asked
“Don’t you fucking dare stop, Dean! Give me what you’ve denied me, while giving it to everyone else, when it wasn’t even yours to give away.” Sam growled.
Before Dean could respond, Sam slid his body down until Dean was halfway in, and the exquisite pleasure spurred Dean to move his hips forward until he was buried balls deep in his brother.
As he squeezed his eyes closed at the sensation, Dean thought that this had to be what heaven felt like, buried deep within the man he loved more than life itself.
“Breathe Sam, breathe,” Dean instructed when he opened his eyes and saw his lover, struggling with invasion of his body. Forcing himself to be still, Dean murmured soothing words to the man lying beneath him. “You’re doing well, Sam, taking me so good.”
“I-you fit,” Sam said with wonderment filling his voice, “I thought - it’s just that you’re so big….”
“Aw Sammy you don’t have to flatter me, I’m yours already,” Dean teased. “We the fit from the moment Dad put you in my arms and told me to take care of you. I doubt this is what he had in mind, but it is what it is. Now, please tell me when I can move.”
Sam couldn’t find the words, but he was loud and clear when he blushed so prettily and nodded his head, as though, he was too shy to say the words. That was his purity, but Dean had plans to dirty him up, and make him ask for what he wanted.
When Dean finally began to move, he was gentle, and careful in his movements, savoring the feel of Sam’s tight channel, as he gripped him, as though he didn’t want to let him go.
“Open your eyes, Sammy,” Dean commanded, as he watched his brother adjust to his cock. “I wanna see everything, and I can’t do that if your eyes are closed.”
Once Sam’s followed Dean’s instructions, the older Winchester, shifted his hips to slightly change the angle of his stroke, and was rewarded with a gasp from Sam, that sounded as though he sucked in all of the oxygen from the room.
“What was that?’ Sam asked, “Do that again. Please!” He’d found it a time or two with his fingers, but it never felt like this.
“That was your prostate,” Dean informed the younger man as he stroked it with his cock again, “The medical journals will tell you that its main function is to protect the sperm, but what they don’t tell you is how wonderful it feels to have an cock touch it.”
“Always knew that you were as smart as you were pretty,” Sam smirked, as he wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist, and pulled him close.
With each stroke of his cock, Dean could feel Sam opening up, both literally and figuratively. Hands that were too shy to do anything, but hold onto his shoulders, were now exploring Dean back, but stopping just above the crevice of his ass.
Dean smiled because with each stroke, Sam’s hands became bolder, and made Dean, stutter in his strokes as one finger found his hole and grazed it. Dam, if that didn’t feel good.
To show his appreciation, the next three or four thrusts (but who’s counting) were aimed for Sam’s prostate, causing the younger man to drop his hands, and arch his back with pleasure.
Dean was so enraptured in the beauty of Sam’s face, that he failed to notice his lover reaching for the bottle of lube that had been carelessly thrown aside earlier, but when he felt one of his large fingers slip easily into his hole, he had no time to protest, as Sam was crooking his finger to find that little bundle of nerves causing Dean to stop mid-stroke, and let the please wash over his body.
“Sammy…” Dean moaned, because the pleasure was too good to complain.
“Just wanted to give you a taste Dean,” Sam smiled up at his brother, as he added another finger, and began to move them.
They soon found a rhythm; every other stroke, they grazed the others prostate, making them both sweaty and trembling in pleasure.
Leave it to Sam to give him something that no one else had thought, or even cared enough to give him.
He knew that Sam was close, when he felt the boy ‘s channel tighten around his cock, Dean garnered the strength to bring a trembling hand around and stroke him until he spilled warm and white over Deans hand and his own stomach.
Now that he’d given Sam his pleasure, Dean concentrated on his own. He knew he was close, Sam was squeezing him, and stroking his prostate, and it started like a fire in his belly, and climbed along his spine and poured out of his cock into the condom.
Dean squeezed his eyes so hard that he saw stars. This is what he’d been seeking with all of these nameless bodies, the completion, the feeling of being sated that came from the one that you wanted, the one you loved.
Once his body stopped shaking, Dean tied off the condom, and made his way to the ensuite, and came back with a warm washcloth and lovingly cleaned Sam.
“Dean?” Sam asked timidly, once they were settled under the covers.
“Yeah, Sammy?” Dean responded, after he kissed the back of his brothers neck.
“No-no more girls, right?”
“No more, Sammy, no more. They were just because I couldn’t have you.”
Sam smiled at his brothers words. Their Dad was proud of Sam’s research ability, and he couldn’t wait to show Dean all of the things he’d found doing research.