I like the idea and the overall theme, message, and presentation quite a bit. The only thing I didn't like was nitpicky, but being a writer... *shrug* what are you going to do? Anyways, the point of view skipped around, when it seemed like it was going to be straight up from him in the beginning, being so into his head alone.
However, I liked getting both, it would just need to be retooled to do so well. A few minor changes would fix it. But the story was pleasant and the emotions quite charming :)
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However, I liked getting both, it would just need to be retooled to do so well. A few minor changes would fix it. But the story was pleasant and the emotions quite charming :)
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