I know this shit is pretty sad and homosexual to an extreme, but I just couldn't help but post this one. Sorry.

Hello, my name is James Horse.

I am secretly a half horse / half man, a centaur if you will...

The archer, Sagittarius, whatever you please....


( Read more... )

My fucking hands are throbbing they hurt so much ( Read more... )

So I'm totally stressed and a pussy ass emotional car wreck today. My insane menopausal mother keeps on calling me while im at school and screaming "JAMES YOU HAVE TO COME HELP ME, AND HELP YOUR GRANDMOTHER, AND THE RESTAURANT, AND THE COFFEESHOP, AND ON AND ON AND ON ( Read more... )

So, no joke, I've been thinking lately about how much of a twisted son of a bitch I am. I have this problem that I need advise on. This possessiveness problem. I don't know what my deal is all all. It feels like some kind of caveman trait that I can't seem to squeeze out of my mind.

Example: I guess since I moved here first before a lot of my ( Read more... )

So...I'm not sure exactly what happened last night.....But I'm pretty sure that I'm destined to marry a Mormon. God has just given me too many hints. And quite possibly, her name might be..

..... Laura Thain..... That's right bitches, James is finally settling down with the bitch he knows he sooo truly loves. That's right, I SAID THE L WORD!!!!

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I get home from school yesterday and there's some random girl talking on the phone in my living room. She's yelling into the receiver, "No baby, everythings fine! It's going to be okay."

And I don't even see my roommate anywhere in sight, so...I guess I've gotten so use to life not making any sense and such random occurrences that I didn' ( Read more... )

I'm feeling like such a menace to society lately. In the sense that "I am a very dangerous person and should immediately be restrained and comotosed ( Read more... )

I was thinking about moving down to one of those dull fishing communities in the swamp.

Like Venice or Port Allen or some dull town.

And there I will open up a chili business. Only chili. Verrryy hot chili. And verrry naughty chili.

This establishment will have no napkins, no drinks, nada. If you come into the "Chili Warehouse of Passion" expecting ( Read more... )