Phoenix Wright fanfic: Intervention

[cinnabonme]

Fandom: Phoenix Wright
Disclaimer: I don’t own the Phoenix Wright series whatsoever, though I did borrow a couple quotes from T&T.
Characters: Phoenix, Maya, Mia and mentioned Pearly, Franziska, Detective Gumshoe and Miles.
Setting: Post-T&T, after the celebration party.
Warning: PG, implied Phoenix/Maya, then Edgeworth/Phoenix
Notes: Forgive me

Comments

[kimivalkyrie]

I love this - I think you've captured the feeling which I've always felt in the games of the semi-ambiguous relationship between Maya and Phoenix quite well and the only thing that I haven't quite got is the sense of time. I'm not sure whether this is intentional or not but time kinda stays stagnant throughout in your fic and then at the end it all just comes rushing forward. idk if that's just me but ANYWAY! It was a lovely piece to read and I hope someday you can scribble out Edgeworth and Phoenix's sleepy phonecalls. ♥

[cinnabonme]

Thank you very much! I always felt that way too, but in the end it's always Edgeworth/Phoenix for me. :)

Can you maybe elaborate on what you mean by the sense of time? I need all the help I can get. =P Thanks again!

[kimivalkyrie]

Okay, like... hm, you start off with the whole dinner in the evening -> Maya going to bed -> Mia arriving and from there it sort of... stagnates you don't really get a sense of how long Mia's talking to Phoenix nor the sort of time he calls on his phone or the time it takes him to do bring himself to do that. I just think that maybe if you added more of a sense of time (for example, if Phoenix makes the phone call as it's getting light, then it sort of drives the point home a bit more)

I know this is a bit rambly but I hope it helps? Ehehe, this is just my opinion ^^;

[cinnabonme]

Oh, I understand now. Yes, my beta always complains about my lack of time passing. So perhaps I should have mentioned the time at one point?

Thank you very much for the help!

[sinnatious]

Phoenix Wright fic! \o/

This was so fluffy. *__* And all the talk of burgers made me laugh.

Oh Mia, you matchmaker~ <3

[cinnabonme]

Yeah, it's been a while since I've been able to write anything. Yes, I always thought Mia was the matchmaking type. xD

[belabellissima]

Aww that was really sweet, you're a good writer :)

Eeeee FFVI :D :D I love it, it's been way too long since I played that~!

[cinnabonme]

Aw, thank you! Nah, just average. :)

YES I'm in love with that game! I don't know why but it just pulls me in, every time. You should play it again!

[father_cat]

Ugh. So fregg'n good. I have no complaints. Just- wow. I loved the characterization and all the little things that make the relationships in the games so great. And- well- P/E is always appreciated.

I've kinda started liking P/M more too.. Though I completely support the sibling relationship. They make such a cute brother and sister!

[cinnabonme]

Aw, thank you very much! It's always the little things that count, right? :)

[agentlerain]

♥

[cinnabonme]

pffft, is that all you have to say?

♥

[agentlerain]

Thank you for listening to my blather on and not hitting me? ♥ I'M A BITCH, I KNOW.

[cinnabonme]

Nah, you're not. It's me who has to grow up and take critisim like an adult. So thank you for putting up with sulky me.

♥