oh, jennie. this lj entry broke my heart. i want to make you feel better. this time of the year always gets me down and i miss you so much. how about we plan a trip to come see you soon? we all need to have a good sit-down conversation... pick each other's brains for a few hours and maybe piece our puzzles together for each other. we've never really been too great at doing that ourselves. we need each other's help.
for the time being, keep your head up. just know how much we love you. how much i love you.
p.s. you do NOT belong in a hospital. only place you belong is in our "group" that has been broken, but will one day be pieced back together. slowly, but surely. don't lose hope. :)
"My heart is constantly aching for things I cannot even name ... my light is fading. And I just watch. I spend half my days now sleeping away time .. only getting up for work or a class or two. Somehow I manage to mask my devastated being for a few hours at a time -- but even that is a weak act that is starting to become steadily more obvious ... I don't know what to do -- I don't know how to save myself. I just want out."
that's the story of my life right now. you're not alone.
oh my jennie, i can relate so well. i'm surrounded by so much love, but there is a gigantic hole in my heart because those that i need are always distanced from me. and it feels like even though that hole is temporarily filled when i see you, or my family, or trevor.. i still know that at the end of it all i have to return to this awful, depressing town. it's hard to hang on when you're not quite sure what you're hanging on for. what lays ahead. all i know is that i need change, and i need to take a risk. i think that's what athens is.
i can't wait to see you. it's literally driving me insane being so far from you all of the time. casey, zack, and i constantly talk about you and how much we miss you. don't lose hope. we all need to rescue each other. again.
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for the time being, keep your head up. just know how much we love you. how much i love you.
p.s. you do NOT belong in a hospital. only place you belong is in our "group" that has been broken, but will one day be pieced back together. slowly, but surely. don't lose hope. :)
Reply
And I just watch. I spend half my days now sleeping away time .. only getting up for work or a class or two.
Somehow I manage to mask my devastated being for a few hours at a time -- but even that is a weak act that is starting to become steadily more obvious ... I don't know what to do -- I don't know how to save myself. I just want out."
that's the story of my life right now. you're not alone.
Reply
i can relate so well. i'm surrounded by so much love, but there is a gigantic hole in my heart because those that i need are always distanced from me. and it feels like even though that hole is temporarily filled when i see you, or my family, or trevor.. i still know that at the end of it all i have to return to this awful, depressing town. it's hard to hang on when you're not quite sure what you're hanging on for. what lays ahead. all i know is that i need change, and i need to take a risk. i think that's what athens is.
i can't wait to see you. it's literally driving me insane being so far from you all of the time. casey, zack, and i constantly talk about you and how much we miss you. don't lose hope. we all need to rescue each other. again.
Reply
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