Keep it in the Cage | Adam/Kris | R
Title: Keep it in the Cage
Pairing: Adam/Kris
Rating: R
Word Count: 4700
Summary: The thing is, Adam's cock is kind of big.
Notes: Written for the ontd_ai kink meme, prompt 61: Kradam - Kris is obsessed with Adam's cock, dirty, dirty blowjob. Apologies for the shitty title. I suck at those things. Also, this is my first fic (well, porn, whatever) in this fandom, so any kind of feedback/concrit is totally appreciated :D
The thing is, Adam's cock is kind of big. Kris is pretty sure if Adam's cock had to battle the infamous Rolling Stone snake, his cock would win. Kris is also pretty sure if he spends anymore time thinking about Adam's cock and snakes and microphones and other phallic shaped objects that eventually remind him of Adam's cock, he's going to go insane.
Still, though, he'd like to give himself some credit. He doesn't spend all his time thinking about Adam's cock. Sometimes he thinks about Brad's ass, and if it ever got sore to the point where he couldn't sit down without wincing. Sometimes he thinks about Drake's voice and if his cajun drawl ever gets hoarse and scratchy and raw.
Sometimes he'll remind himself to get a grip, and sometimes he'll ignore those wise voices in his head in favor of hanging out with Adam.
They're in another city, another group of fans, another show to play, and Kris does his best to relax backstage, letting his head roll back until it rests against the wall behind him and he's blinking up at the ceiling wearily. He's zoned out, trying to recite lyrics in his head and moving his fingers along to where the keys would be on a piano. He hears the others chatting, talking about whatever fans they met outside and swapping crazy stories about who said what. He's not really paying attention, though, not really soaking it in and processing it, so when Matt passes by Adam and tells him to "keep the tiger in the cage, man, this is a family show," Kris only manages a bleary, "huh?" after the laughter has died down.
That elicits another round of chuckles and Kris cocks his head to the side and looks at Adam, who's smiling with a slight hint of a blush on his checks. Matt claps him on the shoulder and says, "Nothing, just Adam's pants shrinking again. Or something."
Kris knows he shouldn't look. He knows. But he does anyway, glances downward and has to swallow around the sudden tightness in his throat. Everyone else just starts laughing again - Kris must be wearing his 'holy shit it's Adam's cock' expression - and Kris bites his bottom lip, stares for a few seconds longer, and finally looks up, unable to meet Adam's gaze. He lets out a breathless chuckle with the rest of them and manages a weak, "Yeah, Adam, don't be obscene," before managing to slip away from the group and head to the restroom.
The second he gets the door closed, he leans against it and sighs loudly. Adam wears those same damn pants every night. The fact that he looks like he's about to burst out of them in certain areas is nothing new and shouldn't make his heart speed up and his mouth go dry. Oh, and also, he's straight and married. He needs to get a fucking grip.
_
Kris thinks he does a pretty good job for the next few days. He thinks about his wife a lot, jumps in every chance he can get to any conversation about hot fans or hot girls in general, and thinks about his wife some more. He ignores any questions Adam asks him about his wardrobe, fending them off with things like, "That's really not my expertise," and "We have girls on this tour, so ask them." He also makes it a point not to sit next to Adam or be alone with him, and when they hug, Kris leans his torso forward and keeps his feet planted back to avoid bumping into Adam there and sure, it feels weird and awkward and is totally different from the kinds of hugs he's used to sharing with Adam, but at least it helps prevent his mind from wandering. Sort of.
Being the perceptive fucker that he is, Adam notices. Kris can tell by the way Adam shoots him hurt glances across the room. Kris figures he's probably not being as subtle as he should be but fuck, it's so hard, and he never realized how close they always are, how much of his time is spent in Adam's presence, until he started actively trying to avoid that altogether. Every time he catches one of Adam's confused gazes, he looks away and tries to be proud of himself that he only thought of Adam's dick seven times today. And now eight, fuck.
-
It's a hotel night, and Kris is blessedly thankful for a non-moving night of slumber in a real bed. He gets his room key before anyone else and leisurely makes his way to the elevator, all the way up to his floor, and into his room. He's barely managed to toss his bag down, run his hands through his hair, and turn on the TV before there's knocking on the door, loud and aggressive and really annoying. Kris groans and gets up off the couch and opens the door without thinking to check who it is first. The noise he makes is somewhere between a gasp and a stammer, and he really, really doesn't like the look on Adam's face right now.
Adam doesn't say anything, just pushes past Kris and shuts the door, locking it. He walks a few steps inside, back turned to Kris before spinning around again, throwing his hands in the air and saying, "So what the fuck?"
Kris looks down and digs the ball of his foot into the carpet. How the hell is he supposed to deal with this right now? Hey, Adam, sorry for ignoring you. It's just that your dick is big and it's successfully invalidating my straight. Yeah, no.
He keeps quiet for a few more seconds that turn to ten, that turn to twenty, and Adam lets out a long, exasperated sigh, plopping down on the couch and giving Kris the most scrutinizing glare ever. He looks away again.
"So am I just going to have to guess?" Adam sounds tired and annoyed, and Kris hates that it's directed at him. He shrugs and sits on the edge of the bed, turning his body to face Adam.
"'s nothing, man."
Adam scoffs. "Right. It's nothing that all of a sudden you'll hardly talk to me anymore, or sit by me, or hug me, or let me ask you shit. Yeah, I'm totally feeling the love over here."
Suddenly, Kris feels terrible. He feels guilty and angry with himself for thinking cutting Adam out was a good idea in the first place. And fuck, it's not like it should be that big of a deal to just…enjoy Adam's company and not think about other things that confuse the hell out of him.
He doesn’t know what to say so he settles for, "I am the worst friend. I'm sorry, Adam."
Even he thinks his voice sounds small and pathetic and he can practically feel Adam's resolve melting and his tension slipping away. He's looking down at his lap, but he feels Adam get off the couch and sit next to him on the bed, placing a tentative hand between his shoulder blades and rubbing lightly. He resists the urge to shiver. "Fuck, don't say that, you know it's not true. I just wanna know what's up. You alright? Did I do something?"
The sincerity in Adam's voice cuts through Kris like a knife. He doesn't know what to say, so he settles on, "I'm just tired and stressed and. You know. Taking it out on you, I guess. Sorry."
He looks up and Adam's smiling at him, warm and forgiving like he always is, and then they're hugging. And for the first few seconds, Kris forgets about those weird feelings, he forgets about the scary new thoughts and the guilt he feels over them. He forgets everything but how nice it feels to have Adam this close again. For a few seconds, that is. Adam turns his face into Kris' neck and nuzzles his nose there, and Kris has to close his eyes against the sudden rush of feelings and the growing heat inside of him. He tenses up, shoulders drawing in tight, and tries to pull away. But Adam won't let go.
At least, not for a while. When they finally do pull back, Adam is frowning, looking at Kris with confusion all over his face. "Okay, so obviously I did something? Or you're suddenly uncomfortable with this? Or what, Kristopher?"
Their knees are touching. Kris notices and moves his leg away, but not before his eyes travel up the inseam of Adam's jeans and fuck, fuck, he'd been doing so well, and now.
"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me." Adam sounds….amused? Irritated? Both? Kris can't really tell but he also can't stop fucking staring. He can practically map out its shape if he tilts his head to the side a bit and stares harder. And he knows Adam is watching him, knows he's being a fucking idiot of epic proportions and that he's being creepy as hell too, but he can't really help it.
"Kris, I thought…" Adam trails off and Kris finally manages to tear his gaze away. He can't look Adam in the face, though. He settles for staring at his hands, instead. Adam has nice rings. "You're, like, 100% straight."
"Tell that to my creepy and completely inconvenient crush on your dick." The words are out before he can stop them and then he feels his jaw drop in surprise. He thinks he must look ridiculous right now, and how the hell is he gonna spin this one? He settles for gaping some more, trying to find the right words to say, but then Adam's laughing, just tossing his head back and laughing like there's no tomorrow. Kris looks at him, traces the lines of his throat with his eyes and wonders what Adam's skin would feel like under his fingers instead.
Adam keeps laughing, and really, now, this is too much. He starts to feel irritated, asks Adam to stop, because he has his reasons, okay? It's not his fault. "It's not my fault!" He kind of hates how defensive he sounds right now, but Adam hasn't let up. "It's you! You…with the tight pants and the always shrinking thing they do and-Adam!" Kris pushes him on the shoulder, and then again, harder, when Adam doesn't stop laughing at him.
He's feeling embarrassed, cheeks heating up against his own will and he curses himself to hell and back in his head. He's about to pounce and push Adam back on the bed, make him stop laughing when he feels a hand close around his wrist, and Adam's tugging him into another hug. Adam's got a hand burying in Kris' hair and the other gripping in his shirt, and Kris wants to melt into the warmth. Adam turns his head and says into Kris' ear with a smile, "My dick has a crush on you back, just so you know."
Kris groans and pulls away, letting himself fall facedown onto the bed and hiding his face in one of the pillows. Adam runs his fingers along the back of his neck, and yeah, that's really nice. He turns his face to the side and says, "Your dick is gay. What's my excuse?"
Adam chuckles and moves to lie down next to Kris. Their faces are so close, maybe a foot apart, and Kris can see where Adam's eyeliner is smudged and his freckles are showing through his makeup. He bites his lip against the smile he feels coming on. Adam just looks at him, eyes blue and clear and earnest. He says, "You're just lonely, that's all. Shoulda asked Katy to come on tour after all." Kris might be imagining it, but he thinks he sees a flicker of sadness ghost across Adam's face at those words.
Adam's giving him an out and he should be grateful. Now's his chance to nod and say yes, to say that must be it, yeah and to shake it off with a laugh and then talk about something else. He's about to, about to open his mouth and agree, but he just-can't. He knows he's going to regret this, knows it's the biggest gamble he's ever taken and knows it could make everything hugely awkward for a long time, but he doesn't stop himself from saying, "Yeah, or I could just have a crush on your dick."
Adam blinks at him, face blank. His voice wavers a bit when he says, "A crush is a very non-threatening thing."
Kris wants to smile. He's giving him another out, throwing those words around again, and Kris thinks, fuck, he's gone this far already… he sucks in a deep breath and says, "Adam, I would like to threaten your dick with my crush." It's not even two seconds of him keeping a straight face before he's scrunching it up in nervous laughter.
Adam joins him, reaches his hand out to touch the side of Kris' face and Kris smiles into it, turns his head into Adam's fingertips. "What the hell is that actually supposed to mean?"
Adam's fingers are warm against his skin, and he's answering before he can really think about it thoroughly, subconscious taking over. "I was thinking blowjob."
The surprised look on Adam's face is almost worth the heavy rush of embarrassment he feels in that moment, body turning hot and face going red. Adam looks surprised for all of two seconds, anyway, before that familiar predatory look takes over his face and he's smirking at him, eyes gone dark. Kris thinks he likes it when Adam's sharing that look with just him instead of him and thousands of other people in the room.
Kris swallows, mouth gone dry, and Adam's getting up, pulling Kris with him. "Well, since you asked so nicely." He feels a shiver go down his spine at the thought that this is real, this is happening, and holy shit, when did this become his life? He watches Adam gather pillows and lean back against them, legs spread out in front of him and hand resting suggestively on his inner thigh.
Kris swallows again and crawls forward tentatively, stopping between Adam's open legs and totally at a loss for words because holy shit, when did this become his life? He scratches at the back of his head and wants so badly to fill the silence, asks, "Don't you want me on my knees or something?"
Adam's eyes have been sharp on him but they soften considerably at that. He reaches his hand out and grazes his fingers over Kris' thigh, gentle. "Don’t want your knees to be sore."
Kris has to smile at the sweetness at that, and the he's looking down between Adam's legs and feeling his throat go tight. He shakes his head to clear it, says, "This is weird. I don't even know why I'm doing this. I just-I want, okay?" And then he's leaning forward to pop the button of Adam's jeans and pull the zipper down.
His fingers are shaking, he can fucking see them shaking, but he keeps his face determined, not wanting to show how nervous he is. There's a million things running through his head at that moment, like what the hell am I doing and my wife is going to kill me, but he shoves it all aside, shakes his head clear of anything that doesn't consist of this, right now, this moment.
He's thought about this. A lot, actually, when he's up late at night and can't sleep, when he catches Adam sitting back and spreading his legs and stretching, when Adam puts on his stage pants and no one can help staring. He's thought about what it looks like and how big it is. His cheeks just get hotter as he gets Adam's zipper open and he reaches inside, startled at finding skin instead of underwear. He knows Adam is smirking right now, but he can't bring himself to tear his gaze away, his fist closing warm and slow around Adam's length, squeezing.
His breathing is rugged and his heart is beating in a frenzy when he pulls Adam's cock out and gives it a good squeeze, Adam's hips bucking up slightly in reaction. It feels weird, strange to have a cock in his hand and not feel the pleasure, but it's so good too. Adam is big, thick and long, and he drags his fist slowly up and down, reveling in the heat of it against his palm. The drag is dry and he doesn't know what to do, if he should spit or grab lube or if Adam likes it this way.
He's saved from having to make a decision when Adam gently grabs his wrist and tugs his hand to his mouth, locking eyes with Kris and licking his palm wet and shiny. Kris feels the heat surge harder through him at that, and it feels so nice, so good to have Adam's tongue on his skin. Adam lets go of his hand and Kris brings it back to his cock, flushed and shiny at the tip, making Kris' mouth water. It's unfamiliar and nerve-wracking, but it's exciting, too, and Kris grips Adam's cock with purpose. He slides his fist up and down two, three more times, loving how vocal Adam is about it. He brushes his thumb against the underside of Adam's dick, right under the head, and he feels it pulse and throb.
He lets go, heart beating faster and mouth open, surprised. Adam chuckles, says, "Come on, that's not new."
It's not, not technically, and Kris has to pump himself up more in his head to gather up the courage to slide down the bed a bit more, getting his face level with Adam's dick, so much more intimidating and full from this angle.
He feels pretty lost at this point, Adam's dick still in one hand, the other resting awkwardly on the bed, holding himself up. "Um." He also doesn't really know where to stare, since he's eye-level with Adam's cock, and hey, when the fuck did that happen? He knows he's blushing and he feels his face heating up, and he kind of wants to run away, but a stronger part of him wants to just suck the damn thing already, and Kris is really, really lost.
It's okay, though. It's okay because Adam is chuckling softly again and carding his fingers through Kris' hair and that feels really nice. He closes his eyes and lets himself be petted and thinks about how this feels almost like normal, Kris lying down near Adam and Adam touching him softly. Well, except for the part where Kris' face is in Adam's crotch and he's got a huge dick in his hand.
He can't help but laugh slightly to himself at that. "What?" Adam asks.
"Nothing, just-- I'm kind of lost." He's glad he's said it, but now he feels really stupid. He's made such a fucking big deal over everything and now he's here, with Adam's pants open and his cock in his hand, and he still doesn't know what to do.
Adam doesn't laugh at him, only smiles encouragingly and says, "You know, I've thought about this, but I never thought it could actually happen in a million years." He sounds almost… in awe, Kris thinks, and he feels himself swell with happiness that Adam's thought about this, maybe as much as Kris has. It's surreal for both of them, he realizes, and he just laughs to himself again, resting his forehead against Adam's hip.
Adam touches his hair some more, runs his fingers along the back of Kris' neck and whispers, "Just try to do what you know feels good on you." Adam scratches at his scalp, gathers strands of Kris' hair between his fingers and tugs a little. Kris shivers and lifts his head, eyes seeking out Adam's.
"Yeah?" Adam bites his lip and nods, and Kris thinks fuck it, he's already brought them this far, he's going to finish what he's started, finish what he's wanted. His fist is loosened around Adam's dick so he tightens it again, feeling Adam's flesh harden once more. It's thrilling and such a turn on to see and feel Adam get hard in his hand, because of him.
This is the easy part. Having Adam in his hand, that's easy, at least compared to what he's going to do next. He's so fucking nervous, but Adam just touches his forehead, pets his hair, and it's easier. He leans forward, closes his eyes because he doesn't think he can bear to see, and flicks his tongue out, giving Adam's cock a few tentative licks.
Adam makes a small noise, shifts and adjusts his hips, and Kris opens his eyes, opens his mouth, and takes the head of Adam's cock inside, sucking gently. Adam's wound tight, like he's holding his breath, and he exhales as soon as Kris sucks, breathes, "Jesus, Kris," and wraps his fingers in Kris' hair with more purpose.
It's strange. Adam is hard and full in his mouth, tasting like skin and something else. It's strange but he kind of likes it, likes that it's Adam, finally, and he gets to do this. He pulls off, takes a breath, and sucks the head in again, going down a bit further, testing it out. He has a brief moment of panic that he's not doing this right, that he's embarrassing himself and Adam is thinking of someone else or wishing for someone else, but then he feels that reassuring tug on his hair again and hears Adam breathe in fast, hips jerking up slightly.
He almost nods to himself as he goes down a bit more, trying to take as much of it in as he can. He goes down, then back up, sucks the head, and down again, setting up a rhythm, trying to get used to it. He's focusing so hard on this, trying to count in his head, three seconds to go down, wait, three seconds coming up, suck. He's so focused that it takes him a bit before he realizes Adam is talking to him, trying to pull him up. He goes, pulls off of Adam's cock with a little pop, and looks at Adam for the first time since he started.
He feels like he's had the breath knocked out of him. Adam is gorgeous. He's always gorgeous, but right now, Adam is gorgeous, eyes half-lidded, lips wet and parted, staring down at Kris with intent and something else written on his face. Kris swallows, tastes Adam all over his tongue, and blinks up at him, unsure. "Am I-- Is it okay? Am I doing it right?"
Adam just stares at him for what seems like forever, honing in on Kris lips, making him blush. Eventually he says, "Yeah, you're fine, you're fine. Just-You're thinking too much. Don't think about it, just do it." Adam's voice is rough, raw, low and guttural like he's the one who just spent the past however many minutes with a dick in his mouth. It makes Kris' cock throb in his pants and he nods, giving Adam's dick a few licks before wrapping his lips back around it and doing whatever the hell he wants, rhythm and concentration and everything else be damned.
It's a lot messier this way, Kris thinks. He's got spit dripping everywhere, all down Adam's cock and collecting on the hand he has wrapped firmly around the base. His lips are wet and Kris really wants to just swallow or wipe his mouth or something, but he forgets about it, doesn't think about anything except the feel of Adam in his mouth, full, hot. He goes down as much as he can without choking, comes back up and off, licking a long stripe up the underside of Adam's dick and tonguing his slit, tasting salty bitterness.
He would curse himself for being such a disgusting slob with it, would tell himself to stop making a fool out of himself and start thinking about how slutty he probably looks like this, bobbing enthusiastically and dripping spit everywhere. He'd tell himself to stop except for how Adam's gone absolutely feral at it all. He's gasping, grunting, moaning and tugging hard at Kris' hair, pushing down on his head, gripping the back of his neck and scratching his nails there. He's talking, saying things like, "Kris, fuck," and "You look so good like this, baby," and "Fuck, wanted this for so long," so Kris doesn’t much feel like changing his game at all.
He doesn't stop and he doesn't try to make it neater and he thinks that if Adam says his name like that one more time, he's going to come in his pants before Adam comes in his mouth. And it's hot, thinking about it. He's working his mouth faster now, relishing the ache in his jaw and moving his hand faster all along the part of Adam's cock he can't seem to fit in his mouth. He wants this, wants Adam to come so badly it almost hurts, and he pulls off at that, doesn't stop stroking his hand over Adam's hardened flesh and breathes, voice raw and desperate, "Please, Adam, come on."
"Kris, Kris, fuck." It's the most undone Kris has ever heard Adam sound, and he did that. He feels proud, feels happy, feels turned on as fuck, and it's only a few more tugs of his fist, a few more sucks to the crown of Adam's cock before Adam tenses completely, tosses his head back and tugs hard at Kris' hair, come spilling onto Kris' fingers, his lips, the side of his face. He keeps up the speed of his hand, pulls Adam through the aftershocks, and breathes out a litany of Adam's name.
He tugs until Adam's hips flinch away on reflex, until it's totally over and Kris has the wetness along the side of his face and the bitterness in his mouth to show for it. He licks his lips, tastes it and smiles, and looks at Adam. He's completely checked out, completely blissed out and sated and Kris wants that so bad right now, he can almost taste it himself. He whimpers, says, "Can you, please, can you-" but Adam gets the drift before he has to finish asking, eyes going dark again as he gets up and pushes Kris down onto the pillows.
Adam works fast, sliding down Kris' body and undoing his pants, getting his lips around Kris' cock before he has any idea of what's happened. Kris can only groan, arch his back and spread his thighs as much as he can with his pants still on while Adam takes him all the way in. He can feel himself nudging the back of Adam's throat, and the way he looks like that, eyelashes fanned out against his cheeks, face hollowed as he sucks Kris in, is enough to send him over the edge for good. He cries out, says Adam's name and gasps the entire time, thrusting his hips up as Adam lets him ride it out till the end.
It's over too soon, Kris thinks, when Adam flops down next to him and runs his hand against his mouth. He's tired, so tired, but he glances over and Adam smiles at him, happy. There's a lot to think about, like how this could change everything, how it all means something else now, but he doesn't let that take over. He says, "I'm sticky and gross and you came on my fucking face," and Adam just laughs.
"Wanna shower before bed?"
Kris thinks about it, about letting the warm water run over their tired bodies, about being in there with Adam and answers "Yes," before he knows it.
Pairing: Adam/Kris
Rating: R
Word Count: 4700
Summary: The thing is, Adam's cock is kind of big.
Notes: Written for the ontd_ai kink meme, prompt 61: Kradam - Kris is obsessed with Adam's cock, dirty, dirty blowjob. Apologies for the shitty title. I suck at those things. Also, this is my first fic (well, porn, whatever) in this fandom, so any kind of feedback/concrit is totally appreciated :D
The thing is, Adam's cock is kind of big. Kris is pretty sure if Adam's cock had to battle the infamous Rolling Stone snake, his cock would win. Kris is also pretty sure if he spends anymore time thinking about Adam's cock and snakes and microphones and other phallic shaped objects that eventually remind him of Adam's cock, he's going to go insane.
Still, though, he'd like to give himself some credit. He doesn't spend all his time thinking about Adam's cock. Sometimes he thinks about Brad's ass, and if it ever got sore to the point where he couldn't sit down without wincing. Sometimes he thinks about Drake's voice and if his cajun drawl ever gets hoarse and scratchy and raw.
Sometimes he'll remind himself to get a grip, and sometimes he'll ignore those wise voices in his head in favor of hanging out with Adam.
They're in another city, another group of fans, another show to play, and Kris does his best to relax backstage, letting his head roll back until it rests against the wall behind him and he's blinking up at the ceiling wearily. He's zoned out, trying to recite lyrics in his head and moving his fingers along to where the keys would be on a piano. He hears the others chatting, talking about whatever fans they met outside and swapping crazy stories about who said what. He's not really paying attention, though, not really soaking it in and processing it, so when Matt passes by Adam and tells him to "keep the tiger in the cage, man, this is a family show," Kris only manages a bleary, "huh?" after the laughter has died down.
That elicits another round of chuckles and Kris cocks his head to the side and looks at Adam, who's smiling with a slight hint of a blush on his checks. Matt claps him on the shoulder and says, "Nothing, just Adam's pants shrinking again. Or something."
Kris knows he shouldn't look. He knows. But he does anyway, glances downward and has to swallow around the sudden tightness in his throat. Everyone else just starts laughing again - Kris must be wearing his 'holy shit it's Adam's cock' expression - and Kris bites his bottom lip, stares for a few seconds longer, and finally looks up, unable to meet Adam's gaze. He lets out a breathless chuckle with the rest of them and manages a weak, "Yeah, Adam, don't be obscene," before managing to slip away from the group and head to the restroom.
The second he gets the door closed, he leans against it and sighs loudly. Adam wears those same damn pants every night. The fact that he looks like he's about to burst out of them in certain areas is nothing new and shouldn't make his heart speed up and his mouth go dry. Oh, and also, he's straight and married. He needs to get a fucking grip.
_
Kris thinks he does a pretty good job for the next few days. He thinks about his wife a lot, jumps in every chance he can get to any conversation about hot fans or hot girls in general, and thinks about his wife some more. He ignores any questions Adam asks him about his wardrobe, fending them off with things like, "That's really not my expertise," and "We have girls on this tour, so ask them." He also makes it a point not to sit next to Adam or be alone with him, and when they hug, Kris leans his torso forward and keeps his feet planted back to avoid bumping into Adam there and sure, it feels weird and awkward and is totally different from the kinds of hugs he's used to sharing with Adam, but at least it helps prevent his mind from wandering. Sort of.
Being the perceptive fucker that he is, Adam notices. Kris can tell by the way Adam shoots him hurt glances across the room. Kris figures he's probably not being as subtle as he should be but fuck, it's so hard, and he never realized how close they always are, how much of his time is spent in Adam's presence, until he started actively trying to avoid that altogether. Every time he catches one of Adam's confused gazes, he looks away and tries to be proud of himself that he only thought of Adam's dick seven times today. And now eight, fuck.
-
It's a hotel night, and Kris is blessedly thankful for a non-moving night of slumber in a real bed. He gets his room key before anyone else and leisurely makes his way to the elevator, all the way up to his floor, and into his room. He's barely managed to toss his bag down, run his hands through his hair, and turn on the TV before there's knocking on the door, loud and aggressive and really annoying. Kris groans and gets up off the couch and opens the door without thinking to check who it is first. The noise he makes is somewhere between a gasp and a stammer, and he really, really doesn't like the look on Adam's face right now.
Adam doesn't say anything, just pushes past Kris and shuts the door, locking it. He walks a few steps inside, back turned to Kris before spinning around again, throwing his hands in the air and saying, "So what the fuck?"
Kris looks down and digs the ball of his foot into the carpet. How the hell is he supposed to deal with this right now? Hey, Adam, sorry for ignoring you. It's just that your dick is big and it's successfully invalidating my straight. Yeah, no.
He keeps quiet for a few more seconds that turn to ten, that turn to twenty, and Adam lets out a long, exasperated sigh, plopping down on the couch and giving Kris the most scrutinizing glare ever. He looks away again.
"So am I just going to have to guess?" Adam sounds tired and annoyed, and Kris hates that it's directed at him. He shrugs and sits on the edge of the bed, turning his body to face Adam.
"'s nothing, man."
Adam scoffs. "Right. It's nothing that all of a sudden you'll hardly talk to me anymore, or sit by me, or hug me, or let me ask you shit. Yeah, I'm totally feeling the love over here."
Suddenly, Kris feels terrible. He feels guilty and angry with himself for thinking cutting Adam out was a good idea in the first place. And fuck, it's not like it should be that big of a deal to just…enjoy Adam's company and not think about other things that confuse the hell out of him.
He doesn’t know what to say so he settles for, "I am the worst friend. I'm sorry, Adam."
Even he thinks his voice sounds small and pathetic and he can practically feel Adam's resolve melting and his tension slipping away. He's looking down at his lap, but he feels Adam get off the couch and sit next to him on the bed, placing a tentative hand between his shoulder blades and rubbing lightly. He resists the urge to shiver. "Fuck, don't say that, you know it's not true. I just wanna know what's up. You alright? Did I do something?"
The sincerity in Adam's voice cuts through Kris like a knife. He doesn't know what to say, so he settles on, "I'm just tired and stressed and. You know. Taking it out on you, I guess. Sorry."
He looks up and Adam's smiling at him, warm and forgiving like he always is, and then they're hugging. And for the first few seconds, Kris forgets about those weird feelings, he forgets about the scary new thoughts and the guilt he feels over them. He forgets everything but how nice it feels to have Adam this close again. For a few seconds, that is. Adam turns his face into Kris' neck and nuzzles his nose there, and Kris has to close his eyes against the sudden rush of feelings and the growing heat inside of him. He tenses up, shoulders drawing in tight, and tries to pull away. But Adam won't let go.
At least, not for a while. When they finally do pull back, Adam is frowning, looking at Kris with confusion all over his face. "Okay, so obviously I did something? Or you're suddenly uncomfortable with this? Or what, Kristopher?"
Their knees are touching. Kris notices and moves his leg away, but not before his eyes travel up the inseam of Adam's jeans and fuck, fuck, he'd been doing so well, and now.
"Oh, you've got to be fucking kidding me." Adam sounds….amused? Irritated? Both? Kris can't really tell but he also can't stop fucking staring. He can practically map out its shape if he tilts his head to the side a bit and stares harder. And he knows Adam is watching him, knows he's being a fucking idiot of epic proportions and that he's being creepy as hell too, but he can't really help it.
"Kris, I thought…" Adam trails off and Kris finally manages to tear his gaze away. He can't look Adam in the face, though. He settles for staring at his hands, instead. Adam has nice rings. "You're, like, 100% straight."
"Tell that to my creepy and completely inconvenient crush on your dick." The words are out before he can stop them and then he feels his jaw drop in surprise. He thinks he must look ridiculous right now, and how the hell is he gonna spin this one? He settles for gaping some more, trying to find the right words to say, but then Adam's laughing, just tossing his head back and laughing like there's no tomorrow. Kris looks at him, traces the lines of his throat with his eyes and wonders what Adam's skin would feel like under his fingers instead.
Adam keeps laughing, and really, now, this is too much. He starts to feel irritated, asks Adam to stop, because he has his reasons, okay? It's not his fault. "It's not my fault!" He kind of hates how defensive he sounds right now, but Adam hasn't let up. "It's you! You…with the tight pants and the always shrinking thing they do and-Adam!" Kris pushes him on the shoulder, and then again, harder, when Adam doesn't stop laughing at him.
He's feeling embarrassed, cheeks heating up against his own will and he curses himself to hell and back in his head. He's about to pounce and push Adam back on the bed, make him stop laughing when he feels a hand close around his wrist, and Adam's tugging him into another hug. Adam's got a hand burying in Kris' hair and the other gripping in his shirt, and Kris wants to melt into the warmth. Adam turns his head and says into Kris' ear with a smile, "My dick has a crush on you back, just so you know."
Kris groans and pulls away, letting himself fall facedown onto the bed and hiding his face in one of the pillows. Adam runs his fingers along the back of his neck, and yeah, that's really nice. He turns his face to the side and says, "Your dick is gay. What's my excuse?"
Adam chuckles and moves to lie down next to Kris. Their faces are so close, maybe a foot apart, and Kris can see where Adam's eyeliner is smudged and his freckles are showing through his makeup. He bites his lip against the smile he feels coming on. Adam just looks at him, eyes blue and clear and earnest. He says, "You're just lonely, that's all. Shoulda asked Katy to come on tour after all." Kris might be imagining it, but he thinks he sees a flicker of sadness ghost across Adam's face at those words.
Adam's giving him an out and he should be grateful. Now's his chance to nod and say yes, to say that must be it, yeah and to shake it off with a laugh and then talk about something else. He's about to, about to open his mouth and agree, but he just-can't. He knows he's going to regret this, knows it's the biggest gamble he's ever taken and knows it could make everything hugely awkward for a long time, but he doesn't stop himself from saying, "Yeah, or I could just have a crush on your dick."
Adam blinks at him, face blank. His voice wavers a bit when he says, "A crush is a very non-threatening thing."
Kris wants to smile. He's giving him another out, throwing those words around again, and Kris thinks, fuck, he's gone this far already… he sucks in a deep breath and says, "Adam, I would like to threaten your dick with my crush." It's not even two seconds of him keeping a straight face before he's scrunching it up in nervous laughter.
Adam joins him, reaches his hand out to touch the side of Kris' face and Kris smiles into it, turns his head into Adam's fingertips. "What the hell is that actually supposed to mean?"
Adam's fingers are warm against his skin, and he's answering before he can really think about it thoroughly, subconscious taking over. "I was thinking blowjob."
The surprised look on Adam's face is almost worth the heavy rush of embarrassment he feels in that moment, body turning hot and face going red. Adam looks surprised for all of two seconds, anyway, before that familiar predatory look takes over his face and he's smirking at him, eyes gone dark. Kris thinks he likes it when Adam's sharing that look with just him instead of him and thousands of other people in the room.
Kris swallows, mouth gone dry, and Adam's getting up, pulling Kris with him. "Well, since you asked so nicely." He feels a shiver go down his spine at the thought that this is real, this is happening, and holy shit, when did this become his life? He watches Adam gather pillows and lean back against them, legs spread out in front of him and hand resting suggestively on his inner thigh.
Kris swallows again and crawls forward tentatively, stopping between Adam's open legs and totally at a loss for words because holy shit, when did this become his life? He scratches at the back of his head and wants so badly to fill the silence, asks, "Don't you want me on my knees or something?"
Adam's eyes have been sharp on him but they soften considerably at that. He reaches his hand out and grazes his fingers over Kris' thigh, gentle. "Don’t want your knees to be sore."
Kris has to smile at the sweetness at that, and the he's looking down between Adam's legs and feeling his throat go tight. He shakes his head to clear it, says, "This is weird. I don't even know why I'm doing this. I just-I want, okay?" And then he's leaning forward to pop the button of Adam's jeans and pull the zipper down.
His fingers are shaking, he can fucking see them shaking, but he keeps his face determined, not wanting to show how nervous he is. There's a million things running through his head at that moment, like what the hell am I doing and my wife is going to kill me, but he shoves it all aside, shakes his head clear of anything that doesn't consist of this, right now, this moment.
He's thought about this. A lot, actually, when he's up late at night and can't sleep, when he catches Adam sitting back and spreading his legs and stretching, when Adam puts on his stage pants and no one can help staring. He's thought about what it looks like and how big it is. His cheeks just get hotter as he gets Adam's zipper open and he reaches inside, startled at finding skin instead of underwear. He knows Adam is smirking right now, but he can't bring himself to tear his gaze away, his fist closing warm and slow around Adam's length, squeezing.
His breathing is rugged and his heart is beating in a frenzy when he pulls Adam's cock out and gives it a good squeeze, Adam's hips bucking up slightly in reaction. It feels weird, strange to have a cock in his hand and not feel the pleasure, but it's so good too. Adam is big, thick and long, and he drags his fist slowly up and down, reveling in the heat of it against his palm. The drag is dry and he doesn't know what to do, if he should spit or grab lube or if Adam likes it this way.
He's saved from having to make a decision when Adam gently grabs his wrist and tugs his hand to his mouth, locking eyes with Kris and licking his palm wet and shiny. Kris feels the heat surge harder through him at that, and it feels so nice, so good to have Adam's tongue on his skin. Adam lets go of his hand and Kris brings it back to his cock, flushed and shiny at the tip, making Kris' mouth water. It's unfamiliar and nerve-wracking, but it's exciting, too, and Kris grips Adam's cock with purpose. He slides his fist up and down two, three more times, loving how vocal Adam is about it. He brushes his thumb against the underside of Adam's dick, right under the head, and he feels it pulse and throb.
He lets go, heart beating faster and mouth open, surprised. Adam chuckles, says, "Come on, that's not new."
It's not, not technically, and Kris has to pump himself up more in his head to gather up the courage to slide down the bed a bit more, getting his face level with Adam's dick, so much more intimidating and full from this angle.
He feels pretty lost at this point, Adam's dick still in one hand, the other resting awkwardly on the bed, holding himself up. "Um." He also doesn't really know where to stare, since he's eye-level with Adam's cock, and hey, when the fuck did that happen? He knows he's blushing and he feels his face heating up, and he kind of wants to run away, but a stronger part of him wants to just suck the damn thing already, and Kris is really, really lost.
It's okay, though. It's okay because Adam is chuckling softly again and carding his fingers through Kris' hair and that feels really nice. He closes his eyes and lets himself be petted and thinks about how this feels almost like normal, Kris lying down near Adam and Adam touching him softly. Well, except for the part where Kris' face is in Adam's crotch and he's got a huge dick in his hand.
He can't help but laugh slightly to himself at that. "What?" Adam asks.
"Nothing, just-- I'm kind of lost." He's glad he's said it, but now he feels really stupid. He's made such a fucking big deal over everything and now he's here, with Adam's pants open and his cock in his hand, and he still doesn't know what to do.
Adam doesn't laugh at him, only smiles encouragingly and says, "You know, I've thought about this, but I never thought it could actually happen in a million years." He sounds almost… in awe, Kris thinks, and he feels himself swell with happiness that Adam's thought about this, maybe as much as Kris has. It's surreal for both of them, he realizes, and he just laughs to himself again, resting his forehead against Adam's hip.
Adam touches his hair some more, runs his fingers along the back of Kris' neck and whispers, "Just try to do what you know feels good on you." Adam scratches at his scalp, gathers strands of Kris' hair between his fingers and tugs a little. Kris shivers and lifts his head, eyes seeking out Adam's.
"Yeah?" Adam bites his lip and nods, and Kris thinks fuck it, he's already brought them this far, he's going to finish what he's started, finish what he's wanted. His fist is loosened around Adam's dick so he tightens it again, feeling Adam's flesh harden once more. It's thrilling and such a turn on to see and feel Adam get hard in his hand, because of him.
This is the easy part. Having Adam in his hand, that's easy, at least compared to what he's going to do next. He's so fucking nervous, but Adam just touches his forehead, pets his hair, and it's easier. He leans forward, closes his eyes because he doesn't think he can bear to see, and flicks his tongue out, giving Adam's cock a few tentative licks.
Adam makes a small noise, shifts and adjusts his hips, and Kris opens his eyes, opens his mouth, and takes the head of Adam's cock inside, sucking gently. Adam's wound tight, like he's holding his breath, and he exhales as soon as Kris sucks, breathes, "Jesus, Kris," and wraps his fingers in Kris' hair with more purpose.
It's strange. Adam is hard and full in his mouth, tasting like skin and something else. It's strange but he kind of likes it, likes that it's Adam, finally, and he gets to do this. He pulls off, takes a breath, and sucks the head in again, going down a bit further, testing it out. He has a brief moment of panic that he's not doing this right, that he's embarrassing himself and Adam is thinking of someone else or wishing for someone else, but then he feels that reassuring tug on his hair again and hears Adam breathe in fast, hips jerking up slightly.
He almost nods to himself as he goes down a bit more, trying to take as much of it in as he can. He goes down, then back up, sucks the head, and down again, setting up a rhythm, trying to get used to it. He's focusing so hard on this, trying to count in his head, three seconds to go down, wait, three seconds coming up, suck. He's so focused that it takes him a bit before he realizes Adam is talking to him, trying to pull him up. He goes, pulls off of Adam's cock with a little pop, and looks at Adam for the first time since he started.
He feels like he's had the breath knocked out of him. Adam is gorgeous. He's always gorgeous, but right now, Adam is gorgeous, eyes half-lidded, lips wet and parted, staring down at Kris with intent and something else written on his face. Kris swallows, tastes Adam all over his tongue, and blinks up at him, unsure. "Am I-- Is it okay? Am I doing it right?"
Adam just stares at him for what seems like forever, honing in on Kris lips, making him blush. Eventually he says, "Yeah, you're fine, you're fine. Just-You're thinking too much. Don't think about it, just do it." Adam's voice is rough, raw, low and guttural like he's the one who just spent the past however many minutes with a dick in his mouth. It makes Kris' cock throb in his pants and he nods, giving Adam's dick a few licks before wrapping his lips back around it and doing whatever the hell he wants, rhythm and concentration and everything else be damned.
It's a lot messier this way, Kris thinks. He's got spit dripping everywhere, all down Adam's cock and collecting on the hand he has wrapped firmly around the base. His lips are wet and Kris really wants to just swallow or wipe his mouth or something, but he forgets about it, doesn't think about anything except the feel of Adam in his mouth, full, hot. He goes down as much as he can without choking, comes back up and off, licking a long stripe up the underside of Adam's dick and tonguing his slit, tasting salty bitterness.
He would curse himself for being such a disgusting slob with it, would tell himself to stop making a fool out of himself and start thinking about how slutty he probably looks like this, bobbing enthusiastically and dripping spit everywhere. He'd tell himself to stop except for how Adam's gone absolutely feral at it all. He's gasping, grunting, moaning and tugging hard at Kris' hair, pushing down on his head, gripping the back of his neck and scratching his nails there. He's talking, saying things like, "Kris, fuck," and "You look so good like this, baby," and "Fuck, wanted this for so long," so Kris doesn’t much feel like changing his game at all.
He doesn't stop and he doesn't try to make it neater and he thinks that if Adam says his name like that one more time, he's going to come in his pants before Adam comes in his mouth. And it's hot, thinking about it. He's working his mouth faster now, relishing the ache in his jaw and moving his hand faster all along the part of Adam's cock he can't seem to fit in his mouth. He wants this, wants Adam to come so badly it almost hurts, and he pulls off at that, doesn't stop stroking his hand over Adam's hardened flesh and breathes, voice raw and desperate, "Please, Adam, come on."
"Kris, Kris, fuck." It's the most undone Kris has ever heard Adam sound, and he did that. He feels proud, feels happy, feels turned on as fuck, and it's only a few more tugs of his fist, a few more sucks to the crown of Adam's cock before Adam tenses completely, tosses his head back and tugs hard at Kris' hair, come spilling onto Kris' fingers, his lips, the side of his face. He keeps up the speed of his hand, pulls Adam through the aftershocks, and breathes out a litany of Adam's name.
He tugs until Adam's hips flinch away on reflex, until it's totally over and Kris has the wetness along the side of his face and the bitterness in his mouth to show for it. He licks his lips, tastes it and smiles, and looks at Adam. He's completely checked out, completely blissed out and sated and Kris wants that so bad right now, he can almost taste it himself. He whimpers, says, "Can you, please, can you-" but Adam gets the drift before he has to finish asking, eyes going dark again as he gets up and pushes Kris down onto the pillows.
Adam works fast, sliding down Kris' body and undoing his pants, getting his lips around Kris' cock before he has any idea of what's happened. Kris can only groan, arch his back and spread his thighs as much as he can with his pants still on while Adam takes him all the way in. He can feel himself nudging the back of Adam's throat, and the way he looks like that, eyelashes fanned out against his cheeks, face hollowed as he sucks Kris in, is enough to send him over the edge for good. He cries out, says Adam's name and gasps the entire time, thrusting his hips up as Adam lets him ride it out till the end.
It's over too soon, Kris thinks, when Adam flops down next to him and runs his hand against his mouth. He's tired, so tired, but he glances over and Adam smiles at him, happy. There's a lot to think about, like how this could change everything, how it all means something else now, but he doesn't let that take over. He says, "I'm sticky and gross and you came on my fucking face," and Adam just laughs.
"Wanna shower before bed?"
Kris thinks about it, about letting the warm water run over their tired bodies, about being in there with Adam and answers "Yes," before he knows it.