apparently i've started an "if she were honest with herself" mini series
The West Wing
CJ with allusions of John Hoynes
PG
Not mine. Only borrowing.
If she were honest with herself, she would know she wasn't alone in what she'd done. There were other women, probably decent women, who had done the same. There was so much media coverage of this kind of scandal it almost felt commonplace. Not to her though. CJ wasn't that person, or at least she never thought so before. She wasn't alone in what she'd done, but the thereafter made her feel alone. Alone because she couldn't talk about it. Alone because she couldn't undo it.
One night of weakness had cost her years of anxiousness and uncomfortable conversations with a man who showed no remorse for his actions. And here she was, finally having spoken her mind, trying to make peace with a memory that wouldn't die. Saying it out loud wasn't enough to kill the lonely. It would never be enough.