Nsync The Musical

[clarinetkate]

Good lord, I thought this was lost. Who knew I printed out a copy of

Orlando, Florida, mid-90s.
[the last strains of a high, well-tuned voice echo across stage. enter lou, a rotund and smarmy man, indeterminate age. vaguely pediphiliac. lou wears a top hat and carries a cane. lou spies chris, a young singer of modest means, rough around the edges, yet charming. chris laughs and chats with various young ladies after a show.]

lou: [spoken] hey kid, great show.

chris: [spoken] hey, thanks, man. glad you liked it.

lou: [spoke] have you ever heard of trans continental talent?

[intrigued, chris leaves his crowd of admireres to follow lou to a secluded section of the stage. he sits on a park bench and looks at lou expectantly.]

loue: [sung intro]
boy you got talent
boy you got style
you need an agent
and I am just your guy
well
so

[cues high hat]

hey there, funny man
you got a real nice voice
hey there, funny man
come take a ride in
my rolls royce
see, i can make you rich and famous
if you'll just bend over, let me try your anus
KIDDING
just sign the dotted line
you'll be a star in no time.

[chris rises and backs away, looking nervous. lou doffs his top hat and does a tap dance shuffle towards chris, holding out a lump of cash. surprisingly, lou is an excellent tape dancer. chris, though still nervous, is impressed.]

hey there, funny man
don't be running away
hey there, funny man
take a listen to
what I have to say
see, I'm what's called a big time promoter
i've got the dough to fund your fame roller coaster
just find four other guys
and your star will rise

chris: [takes cash, echoes]
just find four other guys
and my star will rise

chris and lou:
just find four other guys
and your [my] star will rise

[chris runs off, stage left, with money in hand. lou dons his hat as lights fade to black. applause.]