Previous: Season 12: Revenge of the Cybermen Terror of the Zygons
Wow...how long has it been since I watched a Four story? I can't even remember which one was the last one I watched.
Huh, it was The Invasion of Time. FOUR YEARS AGO. Yikes, I am way overdue.
You can tell this story takes place in Scotland because the radio operator just asked for haggis.
Oh. Ohhhh no, that's not good. The rig is collapsing into the water. With people inside. Ohhhhhh no.
Well. That was certainly a grim way to st- FOUR DID YOU SKIN SCOTLAND AND ARE NOW WEARING ITS HIDE
Actually wait I take that back: he's not wearing a kilt. Although he does have lots of tartan and, that hat's called a tam-o-shanter, right?
Aww, Harry gets to wear The Scarf.
Additionally, you can tell this story takes place in Scotland because bagpipes.
Said the lady who went to a college with bagpipe scholarships despite being in Middle of Nowhere, Ohio.
BENTON! Hi there!
"My company's lost millions." Sorry dude, it's hard to hear about your American oil fixation over the FREAKING BAGPIPES.
"Do we have to put up with this hullabaloo?"
"I'm afraid we've rather imposed ourselves on the landlord. If he wants to play his pipes, there's not much I can do about it."
I love how the bagpipes IMMEDIATELY stop the second Four walks in the room and OH MY GOD THERE'S THE BRIG-KILT.
I love that Sarah Jane finds this as hilarious as I do.
"I want to know one thing, Brigadier: what's that?"
"That, Doctor, is a kilt!"
"Suits you very well!"
God I hope that's a survivor and not a dead body. I'm a bit squeamish about corpses floating in the water.
"This IS an emergency!"
"OIL? AN EMERGENCY?" This story already feels a bit ahead of its time.
"It's about time the people who run this planet of yours realize that to be dependent upon a mineral slime just doesn't make sense!"
Good to know the Doctor is still easily swayed into action by a good ol' fashioned "hey let's stop innocent people from dying."
Investigating Corpses Even Though It's Pretty Obvious How They Died: with Harry Sullivan
"You know, these things always remind me of three-legged spiders in Wellington boots." ...brig please never stop talking
Angus Ferguson? Congratulations on the Most Scottish Name Ever, sir.
SUDDENLY ZYGONS #thatwasfast
Nice Nickelodeon-splat screen, by the way guys.
Completely random observation but, I just noticed that Sarah Jane's eyeshadow kinda matches her coat.
Oh good, that guy's alive.
Which begs the question: why does Mr. Ginger Beard-kilt-gun over here seem to be stalking him?
HE JUST SHOT HIM. AND THEN H E S H O T H A R R Y
oh no sarah jane don't do the fake scottish accent thing not now
"Harry's been shot!" AND THEN I AM REMINDED THAT TOM BAKER'S EYES MAKE NO GODDAMN SENSE WITH HOW FREAKING HUGE THEY ARE.
So the Zygons seem to be operating that control panel not by pressing buttons but by...fondling it. #okay
It's actually kinda fascinating and hilarious watching this after Twelve's Zygon stories. Apparently the tactile tradition lives on.
Also, there's the added intrigue of watching Harry again while knowing that he'll one day create that epic bioweapon.
Of course, if the creation of that weapon helped give us one of the best speeches/scenes in all of Doctor Who, I can forgive him for that.
Anyway, getting back to our original Zygon story...
Why, hello Nessy! Is that you under the waves?
NO NO NESSY NOT ANOTHER RIG
Looks like Harry's being taken good care of. #onlyafleshwound
I'm trying to remember the last time we had this high a body count before the first episode ended.
"Teeth are very serious things, Mr. Huckle."
I have to admit, they've done a great job at making the Zygons creepy and mysterious so far.
Hey, you know what's great for head injuries? Interrogation.
ON THAT NOTE, I AM WILLING TO BET SO MUCH MONEY THAT THE NURSE IS A ZYGON
THE FACT THAT HARRY FINALLY OPENED HIS EYES AND PROMPTLY STARTED PANICKING SEEMS TO CONFIRM. I'll take my So Much Money now, please.
"Why? Do you think Harry's still in danger or some- AAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" YUP.
I just noticed that everyone's been calling Benton "Mr. Benton" for the whole story instead of "Sergeant." Did he get promoted or?
Another completely random observation but, I don't think I've ever seen blue fire extinguishers before. Usually they're all red.
Well, at least it didn't take Four too long to find Sarah Jane. Shame about the whole Zygon-finding-them-and-locking-them-in thing, though.
OHHHHHHH so the Zygon's homeworld was destroyed centuries ago! This explains a lot about their motivations in New Who.
"In your terminology, human: the ultimate weapon!" A mythological sea monster? Eh, I guess you could do worse.
Ah, so it seems the Loch Ness Monster is known as the Skarasen to the Zygons. Hope you don't mind if I just call it Nessy.
Also, it amuses me slightly that Harry's IMMEDIATE reaction to being told that Nessy is immune to human weapons is "BUT NUKES."
"Keep looking into my eyes. You don't need to breathe." ...well I guess that's one way to keep your companions from suffocating.
Close your friend's eyes and then howl at the ceiling. Because why not.
Not breathing seems to be a theme in this episode because WHO'S TRYING TO GAS THE BRIG AND CO.
Apparently the Zygons are smart enough to build an indestructible cyborg monster to house all their life energy, but not enough to keep secret prisoners in a room that *wasn't* easily visible through flimsy window blinds.
"It could be fatal to break the spell incorrectly." Because apparently this is one of those stories where the Doctor is a wizard.
Oh god, I can only imagine people watching at home back then and wondering if the Brigadier had actually been killed off.
"Will he be okay?"
"Oh yes."
Okay, glad we got that cleared up.
"Where are you taking me?"
"We need your body print."
AHHHH HERE WE GO. TIME FOR ZYGON-HARRY. #presumably
Hey, it's Ginger Beard-kilt-gun! No wonder he tried to shoot Harry and the survivor on the beach, that was a Zygon copy.
"Perhaps it emits some sort of primeval mating call!" ...Interesting conclusion to come to, Four.
"My theory is correct. We're going to have to handle this very very carefully." #practicesafemating
I'm impressed that the Brig is able to stand up so quickly with no side effects. "...What was I doing on the floor?"
"Another Bermuda Triangle?" Oh come on, Sarah Jane, I know you're a journalist but you're not a sensationalist. At least, I don't think so.
Hello Zygon-Harry. Well, you shouldn't be that difficult to tell apart from the real one.
Is it just me, or is this the first time we've had a chase scene between companions instead of against bad guys?
Wait, what am I saying, this totally still counts as a bad-guy chase.
AND NOW HE'S TRYING TO STRAIGHT UP STAB HER IN THE FACE WITH A PITCHFORK OH GOD SARAH JANE GET OUT OF THERE
Is it weird that I was honestly expecting a Wilhelm Scream when he fell off the haystack?
Ah, so THIS is where that shot of Sarah Jane with her boots up on the Brig's table came from!
"You're taking an awful risk, Doctor! You don't know how fast this thing can move!"
"It doesn't know how fast *I* can move!"
Was hoping he meant the TARDIS, but apparently he's taking a van. Speaking of which, where the hell is the TARDIS?
See, this scene is one of the many reasons why the line "when they were faced with danger, they didn't run, they didn't hide" from Doctor in Distress cracks me up. Because there are plenty of times when, when faced with danger, they TOTALLY DO run and/or hide.
I wonder if Tom Baker had fun doing the action bits for this, though.
Uh oh, it looks like the comm device just got BURNED INTO HIS HAND.
Need a cliffhanger resolution? Harry Sullivan to the rescue!
WAIT A SEC. That deer's head was talked about earlier. I wonder if it was a Chekov's Gun the whole time?
IT WAS OH MY GOD
"A cyborg is a hybrid creature, Brigadier." #HYBRID
AAAAAND NOW THE DEER'S EYES ARE MOVING I AM SO GLAD I'M NOT WATCHING THIS AT NIGHT
"I'm not party to any kind of nonsense, Your Grace." Oh come on, Doctor, you're party to all kinds of nonsense and you know it.
Wait, wait a minute. The innkeeper thinks he found the bug, UNIT soldiers were outside, and he DIDN'T go and get them to check it out??
oh god now the deer's just empty eye sockets jesus
Hey Sarah you're a journalist can you investigate THIS ENTIRE OLD MONEY SCOTTISH LIBRARY for clues while I chase aliens k thx bye.
"Hey, you've hurt yourself!" HOW DID IT TAKE YOU MORE THAN TWO SECONDS TO NOTICE THE BLOOD STREAMING DOWN HER ARM
Oh crap did we just leave Sarah Jane alone in a castle with a Zygon? YOU KNOW GUYS I HATE TO SAY BUT I'VE GOT A SNEAKING SUSPICION YOU DID
Mr. Ginger Beard-kilt-gun! Ohhhhh no she's in the castle with TWO Zygons.
Ahhh yes, it wouldn't be a mystery story in an old castle without a secret passageway, would it?
Hold on, if Harry's not back in the pod room, then where is he? Oh wait, I bet the Zygons have him in a prison cell or something.
Yup, there he is. Aww, all he needed to do was call Sarah Jane "old girl" to let her know that he was the real one.
Four runs down a passageway and lets out a blood-curdling scream a few seconds later. That...can't be a good sign.
"Don't worry, Sullivan. We're not beaten yet." *immediately cut to UNIT loading a huge freaking bazooka, because of course they are*
Ohhhh wait, that's not a bazooka, those are depth charges, aren't they?
I just noticed that the Zygons appear to have slightly different head crests depending on their rank. I bet that was intentional.
"Well you can't rule the world in hiding. You've got to come out onto the balcony sometimes and wave a tentacle!"
Uh oh, are they about to set Nessy on London? You remember what happened last time we had giant beasts there. #invasionofthedinosaurs
Four taking adversity and confrontation in stride and with a smile never ceases to amuse me.
"Tomorrow, I demonstrate my ultimate power." DUN DUN DUUUUUN
Benton just opened a statement with "now, if I know the Doctor" and I remembered: wow, Benton really has known him longer than Sarah Jane.
"It's for you, sir. The Prime Minister." Incidentally, who was the Prime Minister when this story went out? #unitdating
Ah, according to the InfoText, the Brig was meant to be speaking to Labor Prime Minister Shirley Williams.
Need to get a signal out to your friends? Just rig some alien tech and electrocute yourself.
WAIT A SECOND IS THAT THE BRIG WITH A BALD SPOT. WHO LET THAT HAPPEN.
"Right, let's see what other damage we can do!" Time to BREAK STUFF!
"Right, we've got about...sixty seconds before the whole ship blows up." MAYBE YOU SHOULD'VE TOLD THEM THAT BEFORE YOU FIDDLED WITH THE DIAL
Wait, when did Harry have time to get changed?
"Was that bang big enough for you, Brigadier?"
Eight minutes left to get to London and save a ton of dignitaries from the Loch Ness Monster. LET'S ROLL.
Oh come on, Sarah Jane, I thought you had the chance to jump him. Then again, I'm not sure what all good that would've done.
Huh! There you go, Brigadier: an alien menace that isn't immune to bullets!
"Well, a fifty-foot monster can't swim up the Thames, attack a large building without SOME people noticing.
But you know what politicians are like."
Ahhh, THERE'S the TARDIS! Hello old girl! We've missed you!
"I think I'll stick to inter-city this time, Doctor." Aww. Goodbye, Harry!
Sarah Jane and the Doctor off in the TARDIS together...the mythical Golden Age of Who continues...
And Harry Sullivan! Farewell, old chap. You were good company, and your legacy lives on.
Next: Planet of Evil