Hannibal 1x09: "Trou Normand"

[cleolinda]

Hello. I am writing, directing, and starring in an imaginary spy movie called The Blarg Recurrence. It's a short film, because I get killed after an uncontrollable fit of coughing.

(Really, fever? We're doing this again?)

To begin, particle_person found a Sophie Cabot Black poem called "Eat What You Kill" that you may enjoy. Also, both the Dire Ravenstag and

Comments

[ext_1878046]

So, basically he's CanniBella? Or HanniBella, I'm not fussed.

(I am also probably going straight into the Rolodex of Death for either the terrible puns or comparing him to Bella. Possibly, both.)

He has standards.

[cleolinda]

I don't think you guys understand how hard it is for me to restrain myself from launching into a full Growing Up Cullen-style scenario. In my mind, Edward is becoming the son Lecter kicked out for refusing to eat people, and now he's at the Cullens' house gnawing on mountain lions and telling Emmett to stop being crude all the time. THINK ABOUT IT. Edward's overly formal, hung up on manners and propriety, plays and composes music, likes to creep around people's houses, has two degrees in medicine and an extremely keen sense of smell, moves with a strange speed and grace, and in the books is ridiculously well-dressed (albeit in beige). And now his father's thrown him out of Cannibal Library Paradise because he turns up his nose at perfectly good liver.

YOU ARE TERRIBLE AT SCRABBLE, EMMETT. THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD. ABIGAIL WOULD KNOW THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD.

[tabbyclaw]

This is hilariously ridicupossible.

[cleolinda]

I don't know which character it says more about--what an attractive villain Hannibal Lecter is, or what a terrible romantic hero Edward Cullen is.

[jubilantia]

omg hilarious. AND TRUE. I totally believe it.

[meleth]

THAT WAS RUDE, EMMETT. TERRIBLY RUDE.

[bienegold]

I am...amused but also horrified?

[cleolinda]

As you should be.

[evilstorm]

Welp. Now I have headcanon.

[evilsimon]

I will never unthink this. It is too perfect.