Part 6
The first time Ryan realized he was in love with Spencer, he was twelve.
He’d been a sixth grader, kind of scrawny, but still taller than Spencer. Spencer looked bigger and he was probably stronger because Ryan never really had any meat on his bones. Ryan was always a weird kid, never really able to fit in with any one group. Spencer probably could’ve been a middle of the road kind of kid, able to slip through any group, get along with anyone.
Kids made fun of Ryan and Spencer, instead of telling everyone about the time Ryan had been nine and they’d snuck downstairs to watch Nightmare on Elm Street and Ryan had been so scared by it he’d peed his pants. Instead of airing all of Ryan’s dirty laundry, he’d sat by Ryan and shared his peanut butter apples.
The first time Ryan realized he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Spencer, he was eighteen.
He’d been practicing his make-up skills, thinking he could totally do this for the rest of his life. Spencer offered his pretty face, oddly free of acne and bright. Spencer hated mascara, but he gladly say still just so Ryan could hone his skills.
“If you act, I’ll do this,” Ryan had said.
Spencer had rolled his eyes.
“You’ll do this even if I don’t act.”
Ryan hadn’t said it wouldn’t have been the same, that he wouldn’t be able to do it if he had to be hundreds of miles away from Spencer.
He hadn’t needed Spencer to know he was quite that co-dependent.
Still he’d been there for every one of Spencer’s performances and he’d even gotten to be make-up artist on a few of them. He’d pushed until Spencer had admitted that he wanted to act and then he’d pushed until Spencer was acting and Ryan had had to tell Spencer’s mom that he’d take care of Spencer, that he wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him.
Spencer’s mom had patted him on the head and told him she believed him in that way that Ryan thought meant she really didn’t think Ryan was the one who was going to be doing the protecting.
She’d let Spencer go though.
And now Spencer is on his way to becoming a pretty big actor. Sure, the movie’s kind of sucky. Ryan’s been over the script with Spencer for what feels like a hundred times and he knows that it’s another one of those things that Spencer has to do to pay his dues.
At least the character isn’t as bad as the other ones he’s done before.
The thing is, Ryan had been pretty sure Spencer liked playing Melinda. Praise is coming in from all over the place. Out magazine did a whole three page spread about Spencer being brave and compelling and Spencer’s face had been plastered on the front, wide and pink cheeked and Spencer had held up that magazine with pride.
Ryan had thought this was what he wanted.
But Spencer’s talked to Pete about letting him get out of playing Melinda for awhile. He’s coming back. Ryan knows he’s coming back, but he’s also going off to New Zealand for five months to shoot a movie he doesn’t even really believe in.
And Ryan’s letting him.
Well, not letting him. Ryan knows better than to think that he can let Spencer do anything or keep Spencer from doing anything.
Still, Ryan’s not stupid enough to think that there wasn’t something there, something in Spencer’s eyes when he’d told Ryan that he’d have to go all the way to New Zealand to film his new movie. Something in his eyes that had said, stop me.
And Ryan hadn’t.
So he’s standing in the doorway to the room he’s been sharing with Spencer in Brendon and Jon’s home, watching Spencer pack his suitcase up and he thinks, this is it. If he doesn’t stop Spencer now, Spencer’s going to go and do the movie and maybe meet someone and do other movies and Ryan will be lucky to see him on Christmas.
He wants it for Spencer because he wants Spencer to be happy, but he also doesn’t want Spencer to leave.
So he says it.
Because it’s kind of grand gesture time and Ryan’s putting all his eggs in one basket.
Pete would be so proud of him.
Spencer turns around and frowns.
“What?”
“I said I kind of don’t want you to go. Do this movie,” Ryan says.
“It’s kind of late for that. I already signed the paperwork.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“You really have lousy timing, Ross.”
“Yeah, I know that too.”
Spencer cocks his hip and Ryan thinks that Spencer really does have amazing hips. Like really amazing.
“You couldn’t maybe have realized this more than three hours before I have to hop on a plane to nowheresville?”
“It’s New Zealand, Spencer. And it’s a good movie. Maybe not Oscar award winning or whatever, but box office hit. This was always about making it big, right?”
“No, this was always about doing the things we loved. It’s about making it big to my agent.”
“I didn’t… I just wanted you to be happy. To be successful. I didn’t push…”
“Yeah, I know. I’m the idiot that signed on to do a movie I don’t really like just to prove something.”
Ryan nods.
“So, I guess…”
“Spencer?”
“Yeah Ryan?”
Spencer’s looking up at him with wide eyes and Ryan thinks he finally gets why Spencer’s mom didn’t believe him about taking care of Spencer. It was never because Ryan couldn’t or that he wouldn’t try his hardest or that he was unqualified or that Spencer’s probably the responsible adult in the relationship. It’s about them taking care of each other, but still being their own people.
Spencer’s never really needed Ryan to take care of him, but he’s never stopped Ryan from doing it either.
“I love you. Not just like in the ‘you’re my best friend sort of way’, but like in a ‘I really love you kind of way’. And, I should’ve told you it a long time ago. And it’s probably a bad time to tell you know, but… I’ve just always sort of felt that way.”
Spencer smiles.
“Me too.”
Ryan nods.
“Okay, so…”
“We could make out?” Spencer says.
“Yeah, yeah, um… I bought a plane ticket.”
Spencer frowns.
“What?”
“A plane ticket. To New Zealand. That is where you’re filming, right?”
“Yeah?”
“So, I’m going.”
“What?”
“Maybe I should use smaller words.”
“Maybe you should tell me what the fuck is going on, you asswipe.”
Ryan smiles.
“I talked to Pete. I told him that if you were going, I had to go too.”
“Why?”
“Because… because I’m a weirdly co-dependent idiot who just realized its okay to be in love with your best friend and it not screw everything up?”
Spencer’s brow furrows.
“Really?”
“Yeah? Is that bad?”
“It’s kind of creepy.”
“I can deal with creepy.”
Spencer rolls his eyes.
“You’re just gonna leave the show for five months?”
“Yeah, Pete said I had really shitty timing because Mikey and Alicia are going to need time off soon, but Alicia told him that the wedding definitely isn’t happening until your movie is over and that Mikey would be totally okay with taking over my job for the time being.”
“You’re being serious,” Spencer says.
“You can see my plane ticket if you want. I figure we can upgrade yours to first class when we get there.”
“You bought a first class plane ticket to New Zealand and you didn’t even know if I was going to say I loved you back like that.”
Ryan shrugs.
“Yeah?”
Spencer laughs, full and loud and then he’s on Ryan, pinning Ryan against the wall and he’s still laughing when he leans in and kisses Ryan. This time Ryan doesn’t push away, doesn’t act like it’s not happening because it is happening and it’s pretty fucking awesome.
It’s pretty fucking perfect.
“You are so fucking out of your mind,” Spencer says against his lips, breathless and cheerful and Ryan smiles.
“I was kind of being retarded.”
“That is so the word for it.”
“I plan to make it up to you. You know, if you want me too,” Ryan says hopefully.
Spencer laughs again, eyes crinkling and Ryan really likes Spencer’s eyes and that’s really cliché but true and now he can tell Spencer.
He can tell Spencer everything.
“You better believe you’re making up for it. Years of retardation Ross. Years. And I put up with all of them.”
“I’m sorry it took me so long.”
Spencer smiles.
“Yeah, well, you’re here now right?”
Ryan smiles.
“Yeah, I’m here now.”
~*~
Patrick doesn’t come back from lunch.
Bryar does and when Pete asks where Patrick is Bryar just kind of snorts at him and rolls his eyes. Pete’s about to ask him more, but then Joe’s jumping all over him and Pete’s never seen Bryar smile before, but it’s actually kind of a nice one.
Pete figures Mikey probably wasn’t lying about Bob and Joe not getting enough free time, so he leaves it at that, even if it’s really hard too. Bob would probably break Pete in half if he even tried to anyway, considering the way he’s looking at Joe.
He calls Patrick twenty-two times and texts him even more than that. He’d feel bad about it, but that’s kind of par for the course. Patrick doesn’t pick up and he doesn’t answer any of Pete’s text messages.
It’s frustrating.
He’s tempted to walk on set and take out his frustrations on his cast and Travie, but Travie threatened to lock him in a closet with their fighting chicken and then tell Patrick Pete hadn’t gotten rid of their fighting chicke if Pete did that again and Pete knows, just knows by the glint that Travie got in his eye when he said it that he’d do it.
That chicken is a fucking crazy ass bitch. Pete knows he should’ve gotten rid of it, but everyone’s kind of attached to it.
So Pete stays in his office and writes some. Gerard’s not there because Frank wasn’t needed today and they haven’t had a proper day off in forever. Pete’s sort of gotten used to having Gerard there to bounce ideas off of, so it’s kind of hard, but he gets a pretty decent new script out of the whole thing.
He’s about to pack up early when Gabe and William come into his office.
“Hey,” Pete says.
“We gotta talk to you, dude,” Gabe says.
Pete frowns.
“About what?”
“Our characters,” William says.
“What about them?” Pete asks.
He’s kind of getting an awkward vibe from them, but Pete notices that they’re still touching, faintly and he’s already given them hugs for getting together.
“You weren’t on set today. We were kind of sucking,” William says.
Pete snorts.
“What?”
“Sucking, Wentz. Kind of bombing. Travie said we’ll be lucky if Chris and Bob and De’Mar can find any scenes that were usable at all,” Gabe says.
“Why?”
“Because we were eyefucking each other,” Gabe says.
William winces and Pete’s frown deepens.
“What?”
“Travis said that we were staring at each other like we wanted to have sex right there on set. He said it might be a problem in the future considering we’re going to have a lot more scenes together,” William says.
Pete didn’t really think about it. Gabe and William are pretty professional and they’re good actors. He knows they kind of have to hate each other on screen, but he didn’t think that would be a probably.
Of course that was before they started fucking.
“Um… guys…”
“Look, we’re gonna try and be cool about this, okay. We just wanted to tell you that we’re gonna try and be cool. We’ll work on it. We just wanted to let you know so maybe you could fix it or tell us Travie’s being irrational or whatever. We just want you to know,” Gabe says.
Pete nods.
“Okay, look, this could be a not so big deal. I’ll just… let me look at the footage, okay. We’ll totally figure this out, guys.”
They don’t look that convinced.
“Seriously, we will. Don’t… don’t get all sad or anything, okay. You’ve been doing an awesome job. Seriously.”
There’s some more telling them they’re awesome and swearing they’ll figure something out and Pete loves that they’re worried about this because it means that they love the show and don’t want to fuck it up with their fucking.
Pete promises to go to the editing department as soon as they leave and he’s on his way there when he spots Ashlee.
It’s not like her to be there after everyone’s done for the day, especially lately considering she has a new boyfriend. He frowns and walks over to where she is and notices that she’s crying and then he frowns harder.
“Ash?”
She jumps a little, startled and turns and smiles a little when she sees him.
“Hey, Pete.”
“What’s wrong.”
She sniffles and dabs her eyes with a tissue.
“Oh, nothing, you know… I just…”
Her eyes water a little and then Pete’s in front of her, hugging her tightly.
“What’s wrong, Ashlee?” He says against her hair.
She starts crying harder and Pete just holds her closer.
It must be that kind of day.
~*~
Pete probably won’t come home until midnight.
It’s that thought that gets Patrick in his car and over to the studio.
Pete’s ridiculously devoted to his show, which is something Patrick knows. He likes Pete’s dedication. His dedication and loyalty are some of his best qualities, but it also means that most nights Pete’s at the studio until way past midnight and Patrick really needs to talk to him.
He’s still kind of thrown, but now that he’s had time to think about it, time to digest the information, he knows that he has to talk to Pete.
So he gets in his car and drives to the studio.
He’s thinking about all the things he’ll say to Pete, everything he’s been feeling for the last couple of years and more. He’ll ask Pete if he thinks they can have a relationship, if they could actually make it work. He’ll tell Pete he’s willing to try.
He’s willing to try.
That is, until he gets to the set.
In all honesty, he probably should’ve seen this coming. Maybe not the person, but of course the first time Patrick’s actually worked up the courage to tell Pete exactly how he feels, Pete would be making out with someone.
Patrick likes Ashlee. He really does. If Pete was going to end up with someone else, Patrick would choose Ashlee. She’s smart and funny and she gets Pete’s humor and has a very accurate bullshit meter and she’s just kind of perfect.
You wouldn’t think it to look at her, but she’s probably a pretty good match for Pete.
Still, Patrick sort of feels like throwing up when he sees the two of them together, bile rising in his throat and Ashlee’s hands are under Pete’s shirt, Pete’s hands on her back over hers and it looks pretty heated and desperate, nothing like the making out that Patrick walked in on when it was Mikey.
Patrick feels kind of like crying.
He runs away instead.
~*~
Jon comes back five days after he leaves.
Brendon’s rushing into the house so he can sit there for hours waiting for Jon’s call. It’s gotten a little lonelier now that Ryan and Spencer are trouncing around New Zealand together. He’s happy for them, really he is, but now it just means that Brendon’s alone and he has to get those half anxious calls in the middle of the night from them when he knows they want to be doing a whole slew of other things.
Still, he’s happy for them.
Jon hasn’t been into the studio since and Brendon had gone to Pete and Gerard’s office and begged them not to fire Jon. They’d nodded and had been sympathetic and caring enough to offer to take Brendon out for some hot cocoa.
Brendon had declined.
But here he is, five days after he pretty much thought his life was over and Jon’s standing there with his fucking camera equipment in hand, shocked look on his face like he was trying not to get caught. Brendon feels like he can’t even breathe and Jon’s just standing there.
“You’re home early,” Jon says after they’ve been quiet for a pretty long time and Brendon feels a little part of himself break.
“It was a filler episode. Pete and Gerard are planning something big,” Brendon says, mouth working on auto pilot.
“Yeah, that sounds…”
“What the fuck are you doing?” Brendon asks.
Jon looks kind of sheepish, deer in the headlights and it’s the end of everything and he’s just standing there.
“I’m staying with Tom. I was just coming to get my stuff.”
And it’s typical Jon that his stuff doesn’t include clothes or sensible shoes or his medication. His stuff is his equipment and Brendon feels a bubble of hysterical laughter swell up in his throat. He tries to push it down, but a strangled noise comes out of his mouth. Jon frowns and leans forward, but doesn’t move.
“Can we please talk about this before you just leave? Please. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I swear Jon. I didn’t…”
“I know you didn’t.”
Brendon frowns.
“Then why are you leaving?”
“Because you’re gonna wanna. Maybe not with Sean, but eventually…”
“How can you say that? You don’t… Jon, I’ve been with you. I love you. I’m not going anywhere now.”
Jon frowns.
“You say that, but…”
“No, Jon. I’m never going to want anyone else. Ever.”
Jon sighs.
“Maybe if you had some time to think…”
“I don’t need time to think, Jon. I don’t need to know anything other than I love you and I want to stay with you for the rest of my life. Not because you’re sick or because I feel obligated. I want to be with you because I want to be with you,” Brendon says.
He moves closer, hands greedy and fidgety, needing to be on Jon. Jon’s got his equipment around him like a barrier, but Brendon doesn’t care. He gets as close as Jon will allow. He grips Jon’s forearms and Brendon’s almost tempted to shake him, but he just grasps and tries to will Jon to understand.
“I don’t… I don’t know why you even want me when I’m so fucked.”
“You are not fucked. You’re a little messed up, but who isn’t. And if you say me, I’m gonna slap you. Have you forgotten how I was when you met me?”
Jon makes a face.
“That wasn’t…”
“Don’t make excuses for me, but not let me make excuse for you. We’re a team, in this Jon. Remember?”
Jon seems to deflate.
“I just… I don’t know. I don’t know.”
Brendon moves Jon’s equipment away as carefully as possible and then he pulls Jon as close as possible, hugs him tight and kisses his hair. Jon’s not crying, but he’s kind of breathing hard and Brendon’s used to this, used to soothing Jon when he’s angry or upset or just really vacant.
“I’m not going to leave you,” Brendon says fiercely.
“You…”
“Don’t tell me I should, Jon. You’ve never tried to control me like that before.”
“Sean…”
Brendon pulls Jon’s face up and looks into his eyes. They’re so sad, so hurt and Brendon leans forward, resting his forehead against Jon’s.
“Sean isn’t you. Every time he hit on me, it felt totally weird. And I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to upset you. Not after you’d finally found somewhere you liked,” Brendon says.
“You shouldn’t have to worry about things like that.”
“Oh please. Everyone worries about things like that. It’s not any different just because you were sick. Jon, I… I mean it, okay. We’ve gotta work on this because I don’t want to be with anyone else and I don’t want you to think I do.”
“I don’t want to, but… I just… I guess I just don’t get it. Why you’d still want to be with me despite everything.”
Brendon smiles.
“Because you’re awesome, Jon Walker. I’ve always thought you were awesome. And that didn’t change because you’re sick and need help. That’d be stupid and petty and ridiculous and I am neither of those things.”
Jon smiles. Not a big smile, but a smile nonetheless and Brendon thinks that’s a good sign.
Brendon can work with baby steps.
“Yeah, you’re not. Maybe I am a little.”
“No, you’re not. You just lost your way a little.”
Jon nods.
They’re not great. It’s going to take work. Brendon knows that, whether there are real issues or not and Jon’s probably going to have to have more face time with his therapist.
But it’s nothing they can’t handle together and Brendon knows that they’re going to be together on this one.
They’re better as a team.
~*~
Gerard’s not used to pounding on his door at one in the morning.
That used to be his life, back when Frank was still in Leathermouth and Frank would forget where he left his key and he’d be drunk and giggly, the guys right on his tail and Gerard would have to be the responsible one that made them all sleep on the couch. That used to be his life when he’d been in his own band with Mikey and they’d kind of sucked really badly and he’d been the one doing the pounding on someone’s door.
But now he owns a pretty successful company and he doesn’t drink and Frank’s cuddled up against him making unhappy noises in his sleep as the pounding continues.
“I’ll answer it,” he whispers into Frank’s ear.
He knows it’s kind of silly considering Frank’s not awake and he kind of sleeps like the dead so the chances of him actually getting up are close to zero, even if the knocking does sound angry.
He extracts himself from Frank’s hold and makes his way to his front door, careful of the dogs that could be lying in his way. When he gets to the door, he looks through the peep hole and frowns. He hurriedly opens the door.
“Patrick? What are you doing here?”
“I need you to buy me out.”
Gerard’s frown deepens.
“What?”
“Buy me out. I need you to buy my production company out of Honeymoon.”
“I don’t…”
“I’ll do it for cheap. I mean I don’t want to take too much money away from the budget. I just need out.”
“Patrick, you’re not making any sense.”
Patrick sighs, one of those bone weary, shoulder shaking sighs that seem to wrack your whole body.
“I just… I can’t be in this project anymore, okay. There’s… my home is in West Hollywood. My whole company is in West Hollywood. My people are there. I should’ve done this from a distance anyway.”
Gerard doesn’t know what to do, what to say. He’s never heard Patrick talk like this before and it’s more than just a little bizarre.
“Patrick, what about… what about everything? What about everything you’ve put into this? What about Pete?”
Patrick shakes his head violently, hands fidgeting and he looks angered and worried.
“This isn’t about Pete. This is about me.”
“Are you sure about that?”
Patrick heaves another sigh and Gerard’s really afraid he’s going to hurt himself doing that.
“Gerard, seriously. This isn’t… look I don’t want to talk about Pete.”
“So this does have something to do with Pete.”
“No, I mean… I mean maybe. I mean, it doesn’t matter okay. I just… I want out. I did my job, okay. I got Pete everything he asked for and now I want a little something for myself. Just for me.”
“Patrick… that would be really final. We’d have to sign contracts. Money would have to be exchanged. Maybe you should talk with Pete…”
“No!” Patrick yells.
Gerard winces and he hears one of the dogs, he thinks it’s probably Mama because unlike Frank, she does not sleep like the dead. He looks up to see Patrick looking apologetic, face in a grimace and Gerard sighs.
“Patrick.”
“No, look, Pete… we have to do this without Pete ever finding out.”
“He’s going to find out when you don’t show up to the studio.”
“Well, yeah, I mean… we have to do this before he finds out. Please, Gerard, I… leaving Pete is probably going to be one of the hardest things in the history of ever, but I have to. I have to, okay. So please, please don’t tell him until after I’m gone.”
Gerard bites his bottom lip.
“I… I can try, Patrick. I just… we need Brian’s signature and legal papers drawn up and…”
“I’ve already started the process.”
Gerard’s eyes widen.
“Is this something you’ve been thinking about doing for awhile?”
Patrick’s eyes squint and his lips purse.
“I… not actively.”
“Not actively?”
“It’s been like a passing thought, you know. Something I’ve considered, but never acted on. I thought… it’s been a year and the show has been doing really good, but my production company is nowhere near where I’d like it to be. It’s time.”
Gerard makes a face, but nods.
“Okay. Okay, if this is what you think you have to do, then I can respect that. I just wish you’d talk to Pete about it first.”
“He’ll understand,” Patrick says.
And there’s something in the way he says it, something in the way he holds himself, in the anxiety and insecurity flooding out of him in waves. Gerard doesn’t think Pete will understand. He thinks Pete will lose his shit and yell and scream and rail and call and text Patrick a million times.
Pete will never understand.
Something in the way Patrick looks lets Gerard know that Patrick knows that.
And that he doesn’t care.
“Alright. We can get started in the morning. It’s kind of one o’clock in the fucking morning right now,” Gerard says.
Patrick nods and says he’s sorry and Gerard asks if he’s going to be alright getting home and Patrick just nods again and makes his way hastily out of Gerard’s home. Gerard sighs and stares at the front door for a long time after he shuts it.
He’s not sure how long he stands there wondering what the actual fuck before he makes his way back to his bedroom. Frank’s snoring softly and Gerard climbs in, tucks himself against Frank and Frank turns, snuffles a bit and rests his head on Gerard’s shoulder. Gerard holds him close and sighs.
“Was that Patrick?” Frank mutters sleepily against Gerard’s skin.
Gerard tries not to jump, but he thinks he does a little and Frank huffs angrily and the jostle.
“Yeah, yeah it was.”
“Well, what the fuck did he want at the ass crack of everyone should still be asleep?”
“He wants me to buy out his portion in the show.”
“What?” Frank says, sleepy and confused and shocked.
“Yeah, apparently he wants out.”
“That doesn’t sound like Patrick.”
“I know. I think something happened.”
“What kind of something?”
“Something to do with Pete.”
“Oh, well, that makes the right kind of sense.”
“Yeah, yeah it does. I, um, I think we should tell Mikey. I’d tell Pete myself, but I told Patrick I wouldn’t. If we tell Mikey…”
“Then he can totally tell Pete. Sounds like a plan,” Frank says.
“Yeah, now if we can only convince Patrick to stay,” Gerard says.
They’re quiet for a few seconds, lost in contemplation that the situation deserves and Frank shuffles as close to Gerard as possible and Gerard hugs him closer.
“I guess, hopefully, Pete can do that for us,” Frank says after long, silent minutes.
Gerard nods.
“I hope so.”
~*~
Patrick watches as the dramatic climax plays out right in front of his eyes, watches as Gabe plays it out great, draping himself all over William like its second nature. Patrick’s heard the music that supposed to go along with this piece and it’s pretty great. The whole new plotline is going to be fantastic. Patrick knows this because Gerard and Pete have been working nonstop, writing furiously ever since Pete had thought it up while watching the dallies from the day Gabe and William had come to talk to him.
That had been two weeks ago and things are pretty much unraveling in an interesting and exciting way.
He wishes he had it in him to stick around.
He’ll stay as long as necessary, make his toasts and watch as his friends laugh and cheer and more beer gets ordered at some point. Patrick watches as everyone gets flushed and handsy and he humors Gabe as he marches Patrick across the set floor. There’s a notable absences with Ryan and Spencer not there, but everyone understands.
Patrick’s been stopped by everyone for small talk, Maja probably the happiest because some of the new scripts have come out and her character is getting the development she’s been looking for since she signed on. Frank’s pretty happy too because, with Melinda gone, they can explore his character outside of his relationship with her. Alex is happy to get to do something other than play translator and it looks like they might hooking Hector and Helena up when they characters find out what the audience already knows.
And, apparently, he's going to be a pirate. Or something. Alex says he doesn't know for sure, but Mikey was fitting him for a puffy shirt, so he assumes he's going to be a pirate. Patrick really doesn't know either, but he smiles anyway.
Everyone’s really, stupidly happy.
He’s not sure how long it’s going to take him to get over this one.
He swore Gerard to secrecy, but he’s not sure how long that’s going to last. Judging by the calculated looks Frank’s giving him, not very long. If Frank knows, then it’s a pretty safe bet that Mikey knows. And if Mikey knows, then Pete’s going to know soon too.
Patrick hopes he’s on a plan when that happens.
He’s about to make his exit, nothing showy, just a quick goodbye like he’s going home for the night rather than hitching a ride to LA.
“You can’t go.”
Patrick doesn’t even need to turn around to know its Pete.
“What the hell is in West Hollywood anyway?” Pete asks.
“My life,” Patrick says.
“Bullshit. This is your life.”
Patrick turns around and glares.
“This is not my life. This is me doing whatever I have to so that Pete Wentz’s dreams come true. I think I did a pretty good job, don’t you?”
“If you leave then you did a sucky ass job, Trick. Without you, it’s just not as good,” Pete says.
“So I’m just supposed to give up my life because you want something? That’s pretty selfish of you.”
“You wanna stay just as much as I want you to stay.”
“How could you possibly know that? Did you ever ask before you made me come here? No, you just assumed I would because this was your baby and you wanted it and I was just supposed to drop everything for your dream.”
“Trick, I’m sorry, okay. I’m sorry if you didn’t want this and I forced it on you. But don’t ask me to be sorry that you’re here or that you’re in my life. I’ll never be sorry about that.”
Pete’s kind of up in his face now and Patrick hadn’t even been aware that he’d been moving.
“I’m a dumbass.”
Patrick snorts.
“I’m a dumbass and a douchebag. I’m preachy and loud and cryptic and more than likely severely fucked up in the head, but whatever else I may be, whatever I am… it doesn’t change the fact that I’m in love with you,” Pete says.
Patrick frowns and he can almost hear the whole studio holding their breaths and its so like Pete to do this with everyone watching.
“You’re in love with a lot of things,” Patrick says.
“Not like I am with you. Nothing compares to what I feel for you. Fuck, you’re so… I know I don’t even deserve a chance, but I want one. Just a chance. On your terms. I’ll go to West Hollywood if that’s what you want,” Pete says.
“You wouldn’t just leave this. Not after all the work you’ve put into this. You’re so happy…”
“Not without you. All of this doesn’t mean a damn thing if you’re not here to make it great with me. So why the fuck would I try?”
“Pete.”
“I would give it up in a second if you asked me to.”
And that’s Pete. He’s overdramatic and likes his grand sweeping gestures. He throws his words around and sometimes they mean everything and sometimes they don’t mean shit.
Patrick knows these ones mean a whole hell of a lot.
“I already sold my part in all this,” Patrick says.
“Um, no you didn’t,” Gerard says.
“I…”
“Gerard… well he accidentally let the contract fall into the shredder,” Ray says.
“Yeah, it was so clumsy of me. I feel really bad about it,” Gerard says.
His words don’t really match the big smile on his face.
“That was an official document,” Patrick says.
He knows it’s kind of a dumb thing to say, but Pete’s kind of looking at him with that hopeful puppy dog look and everyone seems to know what’s going on but him and that’s just a little disturbing when alls said and done.
“Will you just fucking make out with Wentz already before he has a heart attack?” Bob says.
“I…”
“Whatever I did, whatever it was that made you think leaving was a good idea… I didn’t mean it, okay,” Pete says.
“You can’t just say that. You don’t… how can you just say that if you don’t know what you’re apologizing for?” Patrick says.
“Because whatever it was hurt you and I’m not in the business of hurting you.”
“I saw you making out with Ashlee.”
There’s a bunch of gasping like someone flashed the gasp sign and this is some kind of studio audience thing.
“I… what?’
“I came to the studio to try and find you to… I just wanted to talk to you so I came here and you and Ashlee were kissing. You were making out.”
“Patrick.”
“And I guess I just realized that you were never gonna wake up and realize that I was here.”
“I did. I’m wide awake and I know I don’t deserve you whatsoever, but I’m asking if you could just overlook it.”
“Ash…”
“Dude, I was sad and drunk and I accidentally made out with Pete. Honest, Patrick. He pushed me away. It was stupid and you know I would never do that if I was acting sane,” Ashlee says.
“I doesn’t matter. I’m sorry I hurt you, Patrick.”
“Pete.”
“I’ll do whatever it takes to make you happy again. Just stay so I can have the chance.”
Patrick sighs.
“You’re seriously too overdramatic. The fact that I wanna spend the rest of my life with your diva ass is insane.”
And then Pete’s smile gets big and wide and perfect Pete smile and Patrick feels like he’s being pulled into Pete’s gravity or something.
“You mean that right?” Pete says.
“You do realize that I’ve spent the better part of seven years trying to make your dreams come true right? I’m insane.”
And then Pete’s kissing him, really kissing him with tongue and enthusiastic lips and it’s crazy and good and Pete’s hands seem to be everywhere. Patrick knows, just know sit deep in his soul and his whole being, through his bones and all, that this could very well be everything he’s ever wanted, handed to him on a Pete Wentz shaped platter or something.
And, really, it’s feels so fucking good.
Pete pulls away and he’s still got that happy smile and Patrick finds himself smiling a little too.
“My ticket’s nonrefundable,” Patrick says.
Pete frowns slightly.
“Patrick.”
“Look, this… this is so good. This is probably everything I want, but… I still need time, okay. You said on my terms.”
“So you’re going to leave?” Pete says.
Patrick clears his throat.
“I need to go to LA anyway. I’ve been handling business primarily over the phone and they need me there for a few weeks. I need some time to clear my head, make sure that I’m not jumping into this too fast because I want it so badly.”
“Leaving isn’t going to solve anything. We have to work this out together.”
Pete’s frown gets deeper and he’s got the wounded Pete eyes complete with Pete pout.
“You said on my terms.”
“Yeah because I thought your terms were going to at least keep us both together.”
“You gonna go back on your word now?”
“No, I just…”
Patrick kisses Pete softly on the lips and Pete stops talking, pushes for more, but Patrick keeps it to just a gentle peck.
“I gotta do this, okay. I gotta do this and you gotta let me.”
Pete takes a deep shuddery breath and Patrick thinks he may be close to crying and this is not how he wanted to leave things, not by a long shot.
But it’s how things will be left.
“Are you coming back?” Pete asks.
Patrick smiles.
“I don’t know.”
It’s the best he can offer and Pete must see that in Patrick’s face because he nods and smiles.
“I’ll be waiting.”
“I know.”
“Try not to take too long.”
Patrick smiles.
“I won’t.”
~*~
Pete’s latest script is pretty great.
They’ve all been pretty great and it’s not like Gabe doubts Pete as a writer or anything, but he was there when Patrick left.
It’s been two weeks.
Two weeks and ten shows and the critics are eating it up.
Gabe and William haven’t been able to leave the studio without getting bombarded with paparazzi.
They’re a hit.
And Pete is hurting.
He’s soldiering on, doing a pretty damn good job of it and he’s got people to lean on. Mikey’s been spending a lot of time with Pete and Gerard in their writing office. Travie’s been making everyone go out for drinks, not that anyone has objected to drinks.
They’re kind of a drinking bunch.
Except Gerard, but even Gerard comes out and sips on his diet coke. He even tries to keep the whole Frank cuddling thing to a minimum.
But Pete’s still sad.
“That line sounded off,” William says.
Gabe frowns and it’s great to have someone like William around to tell him if his lines don’t sound right, even if William doesn’t understand the language.
Thankfully, that might not be a problem soon considering the turn of events the show has taken. He’s already had a few lines in English, the ones that are him and William planning and conniving and Gabe loves every second of it. But, since the script where Victoria’s character finds out she’s been double crossed hasn’t yet happened, pretty much half of Gabe’s dialogue is still in Spanish.
It’s still pretty exciting.
“Better change it then. You know, if I’m gonna win that Emmy.”
William smiles.
“You’re just putting the wrong emotion behind it. Try it a little more desperate,” William suggests.
Gabe nods.
“Check, more desperation.”
“It’s just that line. The rest was pretty good,” William says.
Gabe nods again and looks down at his script.
“So, what do you think of the accordion player they got? He seems to actually like what he’s doing,” Gabe says.
William nods.
“Yeah. Mike Retondo. He’s good. Mike’s happy to have another member of the mariachi band,” William says.
“Man, that’s going to get complicated. We’ve already got duplicate Bobs and Toms.”
“He said to call him Retondo, so Retondo it is. Anyway, he really likes it. I was talking with him the other day. Said that there’s not much of an audience for accordion players. I think Maja was giving him a tour the other day.”
“Ah, Maja. The beautiful and fair, but also really deadly, Maja. I thought she was with Travie?”
“They are. It was just a set tour. Anyway, I think she was just really excited about the new direction they’re taking her character, that she’s telling everyone. It’s kind of sweet.”
“Yeah, sweet. She’s going to double cross you.”
William smiles.
“She’s going to double cross Victor. And he kind of deserves it. I mean he just dumped her like yesterday’s garbage for Julio.”
“Well, can you blame him? Julio is kind of a catch.”
William rolls his eyes.
“Yeah, sure he is. Anyway, it’s great.”
But there’s something in his voice, something soft and sad and Gabe frowns.
“What’s wrong?”
William sighs.
“Pete’s sad,” he says.
Gabe nods.
“Yeah, I know. It’s this thing with Patrick.”
“Do you think he’s going to come back?” William asks.
They’ve got their legs tangled together on William’s beat up old couch, William with his glasses somewhat sliding down his nose and a pen between his teeth. His shirt is worn and soft to the touch and his pajama pants are so thin that they’re not covering much.
Gabe thinks about what it would be like if he didn’t have this, if William was gone, if they’re relationship had the same fucked up history as Pete and Patrick’s.
Everyone knows that Patrick’s been in love with Pete since the moment Pete stepped into his office and Pete’s probably been in love with Patrick just as long. Gabe’s not entirely sure what stopped them, but he’s known Pete for about as long as he’s been in the business and he knows Pete.
He knows this is hurting Pete more than he’s letting on.
“I think Patrick needs to realize that he can’t live his life without Pete.”
“And if he doesn’t realize that?”
“He will. It’s like writ in the stars are some shit. Patrick just needs some time. I mean they don’t have the best history, you know.”
William nods.
“I just… I understand where Patrick’s coming from. Pete… he was making out with Ashlee….”
“Yeah, well, no one said Pete Wentz was a genius when it came to relationships.”
“That excuse can only get you so far. I get that he was scared, but… I mean if you love someone. If you really love someone and that person loves you back…”
William’s face does that wonderful scrunching thing and William pulls Gabe’s face in his hands and kisses him lightly.
“I love you,” he says.
Gabe’s eyes widen and William sighs.
“Okay, that was completely unromantic.”
“No, I mean… you really mean it, right?” Gabe asks.
William nods.
“Of course.”
“I love you too.”
And it doesn’t feel big. Not really. If feels right, which is better than big. It feels like they were meant to say that, like they were always meant to say that too each other, It’s not some sweeping grand gesture and it’s not even close to romantic, but it’s right.
“Does this mean I can call you babe?”
William laughs.
“I would say no, but you’re probably going to do it anyway.”
Gabe smirks and leans in for another kiss.
“Yeah, you’re probably right.”
~*~
Gerard looks down at his phone again and Pete knows what that frown means.
It’s probably not a good thing that he’s wishing for some windows so he can know if that two fifteen means two fifteen in the morning or two fifteen in the afternoon.
Pete knows that Gerard’s already read the slightly angry text messages from Frank telling him to get his ass home and Pete feels kind of bad because Gerard’s been spending almost as much time in the studio as Pete has. It’s like Gerard’s trying to comfort him, which is great and Pete has come to really enjoy his company even after everything.
That and the scripts are flowing, words magically appearing on the blank word documents in front of them and it’s like magic. Gerard doesn’t want to stop anymore than Pete does, but Pete knows that if Gerard doesn’t make his way home some time soon, Frank is going to change the locks on him and wear Gerard’s skeleton pajamas so Gerard can’t have them when Gerard inevitably breaks into his own home.
Pete knows this because Gerard has told him once or twice, in great detail, just how hard it is to break into his home. And degrading, though Pete could probably guess that one without having to be told.
“Man, I have to get home. It’s past two in the morning. If I wake up the dogs, Frank’s gonna wake up and kill me,” Gerard mutters.
Pete rolls his eyes.
“You’re so fucking whipped.”
“Yeah and? You say this like it’s a bad thing?” Gerard says.
“Does Frank wear your balls around his neck like a necklace or is he just okay with having them on a silver platter?”
“You’re such a dick.”
Pete sighs.
He sort of hasn’t slept in like a week, maybe more. The first week Patrick was gone, he figure Patrick would be back shortly. A week isn’t really that long to be in Hollywood. So, he’d been perfectly fine that first week
The second week had been fine too.
But it’s nearing the end of the third week and Pete can’t sleep because his house is so huge without Patrick in it.
He knows he’s driving Gerard crazy.
Gerard, who he’s kind of come to count on as a friend. Alicia says he’s taking up too much of Mikey’s time and they need to have alone people time if they’re going to get married soon. Pete’s finding he has a lot in common with Gerard and Gerard will sit and listen to Pete and be helpful and really nice about it.
Gerard’s fucking awesome and Pete’s a dumbass for not realizing that sooner.
He realizes it now though and he thinks he’s probably using up all his Gerard time for the year.
Frank’s small, but he’ll fuck your shit up and Pete knows it.
“I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, try and remember that, okay. Because if I’m gonna be out until two in the morning writing with you and not going home, you could at least not be a dick. I’m already gonna catch hell when I get home,” Gerard says.
“I know. I just… Patrick…”
“You miss him.”
“Yeah.”
Gerard nods.
“I do understand what you’re going through, you know. You can talk to me, if you want.”
“He’s coming back.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m just saying. If you wanna talk. I’m here.”
Pete smiles.
“Thanks. I just…”
“Look, okay, when things were starting to fall apart with Leathermouth, Frank was kind of a mess. He needed to take off for a little while too. And it fucking hurt like hell, but he needed it. This, Patrick leaving, it doesn’t really have all that much to do with you.”
Pete frowns.
“Well, okay, it has some to do with you. He just needs some time to think about what he wants. What he really wants. It’s not that much to ask.”
“I’m not saying it is.”
“Yeah and I wasn’t finished. It still fucking hurts. I mean I’m sure Brendon can tell you. Fuck probably half this studio can tell you.”
Pete snorts.
“I can’t believe we’re all actually living a soap opera,” Pete says.
“Yeah, well, we hired a bunch of crazed people. What did you expect? I’m just saying, staying up all night writing and not going home… people are starting to complain about the smell, man.”
“I probably could shower.”
“Yeah. I’m told people like people who shower regularly. It’s a thing. Trust me. I used to smell pretty bad myself.”
“He’s really not joking about that.”
Pete looks up and Frank’s standing in the doorway in pajama pants and a black hoodie. His eyes look sleepy, but determined and Pete knows he’s come to take Gerard home. He makes his way over to Gerard and turns his swivel chair around and practically climbs in his lap.
“What’re you doing here, Frankie?”
Frank’s got his nose in Gerard’s hair and he’s smiling.
“See, it’s really my doing that he’s not a smelly little bitch in his mom’s basement anymore. Although I do miss the smell of paint on his clothes,” Frank says.
“You didn’t tell me why you’re here,” Gerard says.
“To pick up your not so smelly ass. I can’t sleep when you’re not there and I’ve got an early call today,” Frank says.
Pete smiles.
“You’re not gonna beat me for spending so much time with Gerard, right?” Pete asks.
“Eh, I’ve had years with him. Alicia’s just not as good at sharing as I am. If I can sit there and watch him have a geekgasm with Ballato over water colors…”
“Oil paints.”
Frank shrugs.
“The point is, I’m totally fine with you guys having play dates. But there’s fine and then there’s sleep. You don’t fuck with a man’s sleep, Wentz.”
Frank gets out of Gerard’s lap and pulls his hand.
“Come on. Time to go home so you can sleep,” Frank says.
“You’ve got yourself a great guy there,” Pete says.
“Yeah, and he knows it. Hurry up so we can get home and I could maybe give you a blowjob to remind you why it’s a good idea to come home every once in awhile,” Frank says.
Gerard gives Pete and apologetic smile and Pete shakes his head.
“Go home. Jesus.”
Gerard stumbles out of his seat and practically glues himself to Frank as they make their way out of the studio.
Pete thinks, I want that.
At this point, he’ll settle for Patrick coming home.
His house really is too big without Patrick there.
~*~
Patrick comes back a month and a half after he leaves.
It’s not that Pete was starting to doubt he was coming back, nothing like that, but the minute he sees Patrick come through the studio doors, trying to be inconspicuous with his head held down and his hat over his eyes, Pete’s having none of it. He screams Patrick’s name and he barely hears Travie yell cut angrily over the sound of blood rushing to his ears and tackling Patrick to the ground.
Pete’s lips are everywhere, all over Patrick’s face and his are under Patrick’s shirt and Patrick’s not making any move to stop him. Not that Pete would stop all that easily. Pete’s thinking the jaws of life wouldn’t even work.
“Pete. Pete, come on man, I think Travis is gonna kill you for ruining his shot,” Patrick murmurs against his lips.
“He’ll get over it. I own his ass,” Pete says.
Pete’s hands are pulling Patrick closer and he wants to tear Patrick’s shirt off, take off his pants and get Patrick naked and he thinks even that wouldn’t be enough.
It’s also probably not a good idea to do it at the studio.
“Motherfucker, I heard you. You better be glad I ain’t whooping your ass. Also, if you’re gonna fuck Patrick six ways from Sunday, maybe you could do it some place where I’m not trying to work. It’s bad enough I still have to deal with Gabanti and Bill who’ve been fucking for months now and still act like teenagers. And my assistant director is making googly eyes at one of my actors and everyone in this place is fucking someone else but me.” Travie says.
Pete upgrades that probably to a definitely.
“That could be changed,” Maja says with a wink.
Travie actually looks kind of flustered, but he regains his composure and tries to glare.
It’s kind of hard when someone as hot as Maja is leering at you.
“Dudes, just like, fuck in your office or something,” Travie mutters.
“Wait, that’s it. They’re just gonna fuck. That’s really fucking anticlimactic,” Cash says.
“Dude, do you even know what that word means?” Singer asks.
“Yeah it means like there was all this like fucking build up and then like it was like premature ejaculation,” Cash says.
“Dude, that was just words thrown together,” Singer says.
“Yeah, whatever, fuck you, cunthole. It was like… there should’ve been a bigger finish or something.”
At this point, Patrick’s kind of really red. Pete’s hands are still on him and Pete’s thinking they probably should take this some place a little more private, if only because Patrick looks like he’s going to explode.
So he picks himself up off the floor and he helps Patrick stand up who winces and stretches his back and glares at Pete, but there’s not that much heat behind it so Pete doesn’t think it’s a for real glare.
“We could go to my office,” Pete says.
“Gerard’s there. How about we go home?” Patrick says.
Pete smiles.
“Home, huh?”
“Yeah, you know that place you impulsively bought? The place with pretty much all my stuff? Let’s go there. To talk.”
Pete smiles.
“Yeah, let’s go there.”
He grabs Patrick’s hand and he can hear everyone clapping in the background and Cash saying it’s still anticlimactic, but Pete doesn’t care.
He’s going home.
With Patrick.
They’re going home.
“This isn’t… I mean this doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy Pete. There are still a lot of things we have to work out,” Patrick says, eyes focused on the road and Pete doesn’t even care that he left his car at the studio.
They can save on gas this way.
“Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s just… I’m still ridiculously happy about this, Patrick.”
Patrick smiles.
“Me too. I’m just saying… don’t think this means we can just fast track a relationship or whatever. I mean, maybe I should move out for a little while.”
“Move out?”
And this conversation sort of isn’t where Pete would like it to be going. Patrick’s not even looking at him because he’s driving and Patrick refuses to look anywhere but the road when he’s driving.
“Yeah, I don’t know. I’m… I’m spit balling here. Look, I don’t want to move out. I just… space is important you know,” Patrick says as he pulls up to the curb in front of their house.
Their house. Not just Pete’s. Theirs.
“You were gone for like two months, Patrick. How much more space do you need?”
Patrick kills the engine and sighs.
“I just… I don’t want to slip into this all easy because we’re friends and we think we know we want the same thing. We should talk.”
“Yeah, talk. Talking’s great. But, I mean it doesn’t need to be hard or anything.”
Patrick turns and looks at him.
“Really?”
“Yeah, I mean… I think the hard part’s over, you know? Like we had to go through all that angst and melodrama and what not. Now we can just come home and cuddle on the couch,” Pete says.
Patrick frowns.
“It’s really that easy.”
“Yeah. I mean there’ll be talking. There’ll be as much talking as you want. Just… cuddling first, okay? I mean you have been gone for like two months.”
Patrick smiles.
“Yeah, yeah cuddling first.”
Pete thinks more beautiful words have not yet been spoken.
~*~
“Quit messing with your tie. And your hair.”
Gabe frowns.
“It feels like I’m suffocating.”
“You’ve worn suits before. You’ve worn ties before. You’re seriously tripping right now,” William says.
“Easy for you to say. You look so hot I wanna eat you,” Gabe says with a leer.
William smiles.
“Me, on the other hand. My hair…”
“Is Gabe Saporta admitting he’s not the hottest shit in the joint,” William says playfully.
His lips are right there and Gabe leans in and kisses them because it’s kind of hard not to when they’re right there.
“Please don’t talk like that. It makes you sound painfully like a white boy.”
William rolls his eyes.
“Whatever. You’re hot and you know it.”
“There’s a difference between being hot in Teen Beat magazine and being hot on the red carpet. Like the actual red carpet. This is the fucking Emmys Bilvy.”
William purses his lips.
“You’re gonna make me nervous,” he mutters.
Gabe throws an arm around William’s shoulders and kisses the side of his face.
“Just don’t talk to the camera. They’ll probably be too busy talking to Susan Lucci or whatever. Is she still alive?”
“Yes, she is and the publicists and agents and Butcher’s ad people said that we might wanna watch out. Hot new show on the market, everyone’s gonna want a piece.”
“Well, I’ll just tell ‘em I got the whole thing so they can’t have none,” Gabe says biting softly at William’s ear.
“Could you be serious please?”
“I was and then you told me not to be.”
“You fretting about your hair and tie is being serious?”
“You’ve been with me for how long?”
William smiles.
Gabe is nervous. William knows he’s nervous. They’re all really nervous. They missed the first Emmys sweep, that first year when things had been crazy hectic and their lives seemed like the bigger soap opera then the one they were living out on screen.
Somehow they’ve all calmed down, which is a fucking miracle in William’s opinion.
They’re here now, though, and Pete’s freaking out and Gerard’s freaking out and William’s so glad that he’s not riding in a limo with them. He can just imagine what Patrick and Frank are doing so that they don’t bounce off of the walls.
“Yeah, well…”
“You know, we’ve got this nice, big limo to ourselves,” Gabe says as he licks William’s neck.
William frowns.
“Do I look like Angelina Jolie to you?”
“Oh, you’re much hotter, baby,” Gabe says, his hand caressing William’s thigh.
“Are you serious?”
“What, you don’t think everyone else is getting it on in their limos?”
“I think Ryan, Spencer, Jon and Brendon are sharing a limo, so no. You do know that we’re the only ones not sharing, right?”
“Oh, kinky. You think they’re having orgies without us?”
William smiles, even though he tries not to, but Gabe’s pulling William’s leg over his own and his hand is on William’s belt buckle.
“Gabe.”
“Yeah, you want to.”
“Come on. We’re like almost there.”
“Not yet, but close, baby, so close. It’ll loosen you up.”
“I swear the car is about to pull up to the theater. I do not wanna get caught with my pants down.”
William turns his head and Gabe’s smiling and William leans in and kisses him, soft and warm and he’s not quite as nervous as before, not when he knows everyone is going to be there, that Gabe is going to be there.
“It’s just an award, babe. You’re already a star,” Gabe says between kisses.
“I…”
“Mister Beckett, Mister Saporta. We’ve arrived at the Orpheum,” the driver says.
Gabe frowns.
“Guess you were right about it being close,” Gabe says.
“Hmm, yeah. Hey, um, I don’t mean to be a bother, but is there anyway you can circle around again,” William says to the driver.
He can feel Gabe smirking against his neck and he can see the driver smirking in the rearview mirror. If they move out of line and go to the back, it’s going to be at least twenty more minutes, maybe less, but it’s kind of worth it.
“Sure, Mister Beckett,” the driver says, closing the separator as he does.
“I thought you weren’t Angelina Jolie?”
“I’m not.”
“You’re not afraid Pete’s going to get angry? We’re possibly gonna be late to the Emmys here.”
William’s smile widens and he feels like it’s splitting his whole face or something, but he’s happy. He’s happier than he’s been in forever.
“It’s just an award, right? Besides, what’s life if you can’t live it your way a few times and say fuck it?”
Gabe leans in again, his lips and William’s and his hand is still on William’s belt buckle, only this time he’s actually undoing it and William kind of feels giddy right now, high on life and everything and the way Gabe’s holding him like he can’t get enough.
It is the best thing ever.
“That’s my boy.”
FIN