Yah i know what your going through and its getting to the point that i must tell my mom in order to get top surgery. I have been extremely depressed lately also. Your not alone trust me.
When I first realized that I was in the wrong body, I was terribly depressed. I actually knew another FTM at that time, but he wasn't very supportive when I tried to confide in him, so I too felt alone in the world. Thing is, the fact that you're here in this community already tells me that you are not alone: we may be "virtual", but at least you can talk to us. I think part of the depression stems from all the hard decisions you'll have to make in the future. Questions about whether to have surgery or not, to be straight-acting or not, et cetera, will probably bounce around in your mind. I think really only time can tell what sort of man you want to be. Nobody else can define your gender expression for you. Just looking around online may help you to feel validated. I hope this helps a little.
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When I first realized that I was in the wrong body, I was terribly depressed. I actually knew another FTM at that time, but he wasn't very supportive when I tried to confide in him, so I too felt alone in the world. Thing is, the fact that you're here in this community already tells me that you are not alone: we may be "virtual", but at least you can talk to us. I think part of the depression stems from all the hard decisions you'll have to make in the future. Questions about whether to have surgery or not, to be straight-acting or not, et cetera, will probably bounce around in your mind. I think really only time can tell what sort of man you want to be. Nobody else can define your gender expression for you. Just looking around online may help you to feel validated. I hope this helps a little.
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