Kyuhyun in Wonderland
Kyuhyun blinked once. Twice. Three times and said, “Come again?” He stared at the man in front of him.
“You’re late!” he implored, “There’s no time now. You have to come with me or he’ll have your head!” He pulled out a pocket watch and jabbed his finger at the time to emphasize his point.
Kyuhyun glanced at it. The time read 15:13 and the second hand was turning counter-clockwise. He raised an eyebrow and scoffed in disbelief. Where had this guy come from? And where was the car-repairman? He had made the call hours ago.
It was hot and Kyuhyun didn’t feel like playing games. He leaned against a tree and crossed his arms, “I’m not late for anything and I’m certainly not going anywhere with you. I don’t even know who you are.”
“I’m Ryeowook. Ryeowook, the Royal Timekeeper. And you are late!” Ryeowook moved to Kyuhyun’s side and made to push him further into the forest.
“Hey - whoa! Wait! Alright! Alright!” Kyuhyun dug his heels into the ground, man the guy was pushy. “Let’s say I believe you. What exactly am I late for?”
Ryeowook looked at him like he was crazy, like he had absolutely lost his mind, “The Pajama Party! He’s gonna have our heads. We’re late. We’re so late.”
Kyuhyun’s face twisted in confusion. Then he laughed. He laughed long and hard. This man, this Royal Timekeeper, was crazy!
“There’s no time for this Kyuhyun! We’re late, we’re late, we’re late!” Ryeowook was all but stomping his foot on the ground and having a tantrum. “We have to go now.” And with strength that Kyuhyun didn’t know the small guy could possess, he was pulled into the forest.
Kyuhyun frowned at Ryeowook. He was certain he hadn’t mentioned his name to him. He turned to look back to where he had left his car, only to see the forest stretching on forever.
Kyuhyun swung back around to face Ryeowook. “Where’s the road?” he demanded, “And what happened to my car?”
Ryeowook gave him a puzzled look, “What’s a car?”
Kyuhyun groaned in frustration.
“Look. The Pajama Party is gonna start at half past a fine spring day. And we have to get there.” Ryeowook pulled out his watch again and nearly squawked. “We’re late! We’re late! For a very important date!”
Kyuhyun watched as the Timekeeper turned and scurried off into the forest and out of sight. He hesitated for a half a second and then took after him.
For a while he could see Ryeowook darting from one tree to the next, but before he knew it, Kyuhyun had lost track of him. He stopped running and looked around. The forest looked the same in every direction. There were no roads or trails that he could follow. Just trees.
“Great. I’m lost,” he said out loud to no one in particular. Kyuhyun wiped the sweat from his forehead. Despite the shade, the heat was stifling.
“No you aren’t.” Kyuhyun turned around and to face the speaker. “You’re found.”
Kyuhyun looked down in astonishment. The voice was coming from a fat little snail resting on a tree branch.
“I’m losing my mind,” he said to himself.
“Or you are finally finding it,” replied the snail.
“How can you talk?” Kyuhyun asked, poking one of the snail’s eyes, “Where the hell am I?”
“Stop that! And I’m Shindong the Snail. But I think a better question is: Who are you?” he said.
“I know who I am. What I need to know is where I am,” replied Kyuhyun, getting a little aggravated.
“Well then that’s all very simple. You are here,” replied Shindong.
Kyuhyun glared and gritted out, “Where is here? I’m lost and I’m looking for my car.”
“You are here with me. Under this tree, therefore lost you cannot be. Don’t you see? ” sang Shindong.
“No. I don’t see,” Kyuhyun snapped back. This thing was wasting his time.
“I finally got it! It rhymed!” said the snail happily.
“That’s it! I’m leaving,” Kyuhyun growled and walked away from the tree.
“Where are you going? You’re lost,” called Shindong.
Kyuhyun stopped short and turned around. “You just said I wasn’t,” he said.
“I only told you where you were. I didn’t tell where you weren’t or where you will be. Never mind that. But here I’ll give you some advice. The left side will make you bigger,” said Shindong as he got off his perch on the branch.
“That doesn’t make any sense. And the left side of what?” asked Kyuhyun.
“…and the other side will make you smaller,” finished Shindong.
“The other side of what!” yelled Kyuhyun.
“The MUSHROOM! What did you think?” Shindong yelled back.
“What mushroom?” he yelled back but Shindong was gone. Kyuhyun threw his arms up into the air in defeat. He was yelling at a bug!
Kyuhyun trudged further into the forest. If he was to spend the night he would have to find some sort of shelter and water before night fell. He noticed a clearing up ahead and thought that perhaps that might work.
He jumped when something rubbed against his leg. He looked down to see the oddest looking cat. He was stripped purple and pink with large green eyes and even larger grin.
The cat jumped on to a low branch and watched Kyuhyun for a moment. Kyuhyun stared back at the strange creature.
“My friend, he’s lost,” said the cat.
Kyuhyun inhaled sharply. That cat just spoke. Kyuhyun decided that his day had already been weird enough and a conversation with the local cat was probably not going to change that much.
“Yeah? Well so am I. Do you know where I am?” asked Kyuhyun.
“I know all your secrets,” replied the cat, “I’m Heechul. I know everything.”
Kyuhyun made a face. This was insane. He tried again, “Where are we?”
“You mean you don’t know? Ugh, they’re so stupid,” the cat laughed, “Ok here. I’ll tell you what. If you really want to know…he went that way.” The cat pointed both left and right.
Kyuhyun ignored the gesture and asked, “Who did?”
“The Timekeeper,” replied the cat.
“He did?” asked Kyuhyun, surprised that the cat knew Ryeowook.
“Did what?” Heechul asked, confusion on his face. Kyuhyun swore under his breath.
“Go that way!” he snapped at the cat.
“Who did?”
“The Timekeeper!”
“He did!?” Heechul exclaimed, “Why are you like this? Well, why didn’t you say so earlier?”
“Ugh!” Kyuhyun stomped in frustration.
The cat grinned at him once more and then vanished, leaving only his smile behind. Kyuhyun blinked and then the smile was gone too.
Kyuhyun shook his head and decided that perhaps this wasn’t the best place to spend the night. He would have to keep moving. He had to find his car.
Kyuhyun travelled further in to the forest. It was odd. He had been out for hours but the sun wasn’t setting. The atmosphere was definitely clearing up though. There was even a cool light breeze. He was just about to sit down when he heard something from behind him.
“I hope you don’t plan on sitting on me,” said a voice from the tree trunk behind him.
Kyuhyun looked back and saw a door. His eyes widened in shock and he stepped away from the tree.
“Who’re you?” he asked the door. Kyuhyun refused to think about logic anymore. He would go insane if he tried. The door led into the tree and the knob talked. What could have been more ridiculous?
“I’m Eunhyuk the Gate,” replied the door, “How do you do?” The door yawned. Apparently, Kyuhyun had disturbed his nap.
“I’m lost. I’m looking for my car,” replied Kyuhyun, hoping that for once he might get a sensible answer.
“Well let’s see if I can’t help you. Look in here,” Eunhyuk opened his key hole wide. Kyuhyun stared for only a moment before peering inside.
There in the clearing he saw his car sitting by the road.
“That’s it! That’s my car!” Kyuhyun cried out in excitement, “Eunhyuk, you have to let me through!”
“Sorry friend, but no can do,” he said.
“Why not?” Kyuhyun frowned, he wanted to get home.
“You need a key. A key to open me,” replied the door, “Besides you are much too big. Try growing smaller.”
“ How the hell am I supposed to do that?” Kyuhyun snapped back. He had finally found his car, the fact that it was through a tree was beside the point, but now the door told him he couldn’t fit! He had had enough of this nonsense.
“Perhaps you should ask the Mad Prince of Hearts,” yawned the Door. Kyuhyun looked back at Eunhyuk, only to see the door snoring, fast asleep.
Kyuhyun looked around. So now instead of his car he had to look for a key. And to find the key he needed to find the Mad Prince of Hearts. Should he be looking for a castle? He didn’t even know anymore.
He walked on. He stopped when he heard giggling and the splashing of water. He followed the sound until he came to laughing river. No really. The river was laughing. Kyuhyun shook his head and pretended not to hear it. He bent down and washed his face and took some much needed gulps of water. It tasted funny.
“Ahoy, and other such nautical expressions!”
Kyuhyun looked up to see a dodo bird sailing a boat. He wasn’t too surprised anymore. This forest was cracked. He waved at the bird.
“The name’s Siwon by the way,” said the bird.
“Do you know where I can find the Mad Prince?” he called out to the dodo.
“You best be getting yourself to the Pajama Party if you wish to see his Highness, the Prince. It’s almost spring!” the dodo called back as his boat continued down the river.
As if to prove the statement’s point, a cool breeze wafted by, bringing with it small pink flower petals. Kyuhyun looked up to see the trees in bloom. It was the middle of August!
Focus. He needed to focus. It was almost spring and he needed to find the Prince. Then he remembered. The Pajama Party was half past a fine spring day! He had to find the pajama party and quick. It would be starting soon. But which way to go?
“It’s here! Over here! Look!”
Kyuhyun followed the voice to a garden of pure white roses.
“Oh no! This is a disaster!” Kyuhyun looked at what seemed to be an army of playing cards.
“What’s wrong?” Kyuhyun asked one of them.
“Oh don’t you see! Look at the flower bed. The roses are all white and none are red!” the playing card looked at his friends, “What should we do!? He’ll have our heads for sure!”
“Who will?” asked Kyuhyun.
“The Mad Prince of Hearts!” the three cards cried out in unison.
“What if we paint them?” asked one card.
“That’s brilliant!” said another.
“We’re painting the roses red!”
Kyuhyun was about to tell them how utterly ridiculous that idea was, when from the corner of his eye he saw someone darting around between the trees. Looking more closely, he finally noticed the glint of a pocket watch. Without a second thought or a look back, he chased after the Royal Timekeeper.
“Ryeowook! Ryeowook stop!” Kyuhyun called after the small man.
Ryeowook paused and turned back toward Kyuhyun and called, “Oh it’s you! We’re late! No time to say ‘hello’, let’s go! We’re late! We’re late! We’re late!”
For the first time all day, Kyuhyun couldn’t agree more. He ran along with Ryeowook, finally, finally having a destination in mind. Sort of.
Kyuhyun was just about to ask how much longer it would take when they came to a clearing. In the center of the clearing was a large mattress and several multi colored futons, all raised off the ground. The creatures were dressed in pajamas of various colors and sizes and even shapes.
Kyuhyun noticed Heechul the Cat first, sporting a night cap. That large grin gave him the creeps. The Siwon the Dodo was there too, chatting amiably with a small mouse. There were others too; Shindong the Snail and even Eunhyuk the Door! How had he gotten there?
Before he knew it he was yanked into a bed by the main mattress by a small Hare. He shoved an oversized t-shirt into his hands and a pair of pink pajama bottoms.
“Those go on your head,” they stated matter-of-factly. The shirt did, not the Hare.
Kyuhyun stared at the attire. He was not putting that on. His attention was brought to the Main Mattress by royal fanfare.
“His Royal Highness! The Mad Prince of Hearts! Prince Donghae!” Ryeowook called out in a loud voice. He took one last look at his pocket watch and collapsed to the ground.
Prince Donghae walked out from behind the trees and stood on his bed. Kyuhyun noticed that the prince was in fact very handsome. As princely as they come -that is if princes came wearing black pajama bottoms with large red hearts. The Prince made eye contact and gave him a smile that left Kyuhyun breathless and slightly flushed. It had to have been all the running.
Prince Donghae’s eyes twinkled and he said, “Welcome one and all to my Very Happy Unbirthday Pajama Party! Enjoy the pillows!” he said.
“Unbirthday?” mumbled Kyuhyun.
“Why, he doesn’t know what an Unbirthday is!” gasped the Hare.
The creatures gasped and fell silent.
“Of course I do. Don’t be so ridiculous,” said Kyuhyun, hoping not to cause a scene.
The people at the table relaxed. Following their motions, Kyuhyun grabbed a pillow and sat back. He watched as Donghae laughed and jested with the others at the mattress. Mad or not, Kyuhyun decided that he liked the Prince’s laugh. Kyuhyun sighed. He still needed to get that key.
As if the Prince had heard his thoughts, he appeared before him.
“What seems to trouble you, Noble Sir of Strangest Clothing?” Donghae asked, kneeling before him and taking Kyuhyun’s hand in his own. He looked up at Kyuhyun, his eyes twinkling like diamonds.
“Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are?” squeaked a small voice. Kyuhyun couldn’t break eye the Prince’s eye contact.
“Be quiet Hangeng!” said Siwon, kicking a small dormouse.
Kyuhyun’s eye widened and heat flooded his face. The Prince was even more charming up close. How were you supposed to talk to address a Mad Prince? “Forgive me, Prince Donghae,” he said, “I need a key to return home. I was told you could help me.”
“It’s time for magic, I see!” Donghae gave a quick kiss to Kyuhyun’s hand and returned to his mattress, leaving Kyuhyun shocked and slightly flushed, “Cards! Bring me my tricks!”
Kyuhyun watched as the three cards from earlier brought in a tray with a small white tea set on it.
“Oh this just won’t do!” said the Hare next to him, “You need to be standing up there too!”
“Henry’s right you know,” agreed Heechul the Cat. He vanished and reappeared in front of Kyuhyun, urging him to the stage.
Kyuhyun’s heart fluttered when Donghae noticed him approaching the bed. The Prince waved him over as he picked up the teapot and opened the lid to show his guests. The pot was empty. He closed the lid and poured tea into the small tea cup. Kyuhyun watched in amazement.
Donghae brought the teacup to his lips and gave it a sip. Then he coughed. A hacking cough. Kyuhyun almost reached out to rub his back and see if the man was ok. What if it had been poisoned?
He only relaxed when he saw Donghae smile and raise his hand. The Prince opened his mouth and pulled from it a collection of multi color handkerchiefs.
The crowd cheered and Kyuhyun couldn’t help but applaud. The grin that Donghae sent his way made it totally worth it.
Next, Donghae untied one of his handkerchiefs and placed it over his fist. He turned to Kyuhyun and bent down on one knee. Kyuhyun’s breath caught. Donghae locked his eyes with Kyuhyun’s and waved a hand over the handkerchief. When he pulled the cloth away, in his hand was a bright red rose.
“For you,” Donghae handed Kyuhyun the rose. Kyuhyun could do nothing but accept.
As Kyuhyun was about to take the rose from the Prince’s hand, a small red dot dripped from the flower onto his hand. Donghae let the flower fall and inspected Donghae’s hand. It was paint!
Donghae turned to his Cards and yelled, “You three on my bed! Who’s been painting my roses red?”
“It wasn’t I your Grace, ask Leeteuk the Ace!” cried the first.
“Leeteuk was it you?” Donghae asked the Ace.
“No no! You’re majesty, it was Kangin, the Two,” the Ace replied.
“Kangin is this true? Who is it gonna be?” asked Donghae.
“No way dear Prince, it was all Sungmin the Three,” he said as he pointed to the first Card.
“Wasn’t it all of you three?” asked Kyuhyun, slightly confused. The Cards looked at him in terror. Maybe he shouldn’t have spoken.
“So, is that how it was? I see” said Donghae, and turned to his Cards. “Off with their heads! Immediately!”
The three looked up in panic and within moments they were led away by other Cards.
“No wait!” said Kyuhyun, slightly alarmed. Sure, this place made no sense, but the Cards didn’t deserve to die. “Are you really going to kill them?”
Donghae laughed and waved his hand, “No, of course not. It’s just fun to say. Now tell me what can I help you with today?”
Donghae moved closer to Kyuhyun and leaned forward, their noses almost touching. Kyuhyun could almost feel the Prince breathing. Slightly stunned by the Prince’s boldness, Kyuhyun stepped back, only to have the Prince wrap his arm around his waist and pull him closer. He stole a small kiss on the corner of Kyuhyun’s mouth.
“I -I need a key, “Kyuhyun stuttered, he was more than a little flustered, “A key to Eunhyuk the Door. My car is on the other side.”
Donghae looked at him sadly, his eyes searching Kyuhyun’s for something. After a moment, he let the arm around Kyuhyun’s waist drop. Donghae turned his head to the ground, sad.
“Kyuhyun, tell me. Why is the fish like a cell phone plan?” Donghae asked mournfully.
“Is this a riddle?” asked Kyuhyun, confused. Maybe if he answered correctly he would get the key. “…Why is the fish like a cell phone plan eh?”
“I beg your pardon?” said Donghae, looking up wide eyed in surprised.
“Why is the fish like a cell phone plan? …Right?” Kyuhyun repeated.
“Why is what!?” Donghae cried in alarm.
“He’s Mad! Gone totally bananas!” Heechul cried from the tree.
“Cards! Off with his head!” Donghae yelled at the Decks and pointed at Kyuhyun.
The Cards advanced. Kyuhyun was sure he had seen Sungmin with them. Maybe it was Kangin. Or maybe it was someone else all together. He couldn’t tell anymore.
“It was your stupid riddle!” Kyuhyun snapped at the Prince of Hearts. He kept his eyes on the advancing Cards. Donghae had said that he liked saying that phrase for fun, but that didn’t do anything to ease Kyuhyun’s fears. These games had gone far enough. He wanted to put an end to all this. This Prince really was Mad.
“You’re breaking my heart,” said Donghae, giving him a look that very much resembled a kicked puppy.
“I- uh,” Kyuhyun didn’t know how to respond, he liked the Prince, but nothing he said made sense. It was all very confusing.
He looked back at the pajama party. All activity had ceased and every creature was facing Kyuhyun. The Cards were almost upon him. Feeling slightly panicked, Kyuhyun stepped away from the Prince.
It must have been the wrong movement because all of a sudden the Cards broke in to a run, ready to grab him. Kyuhyun turned and ran.
He circled the line of futons.
“Theif! Theif!” cried Donghae, “He took it! Someone get it back!”
Kyuhyun could feel Donghae behind him, chasing him with all that he had in him. The rest of the creatures had left their seats to join. A few of them even tossed their pillows at each other for fun.
“I didn’t steal anything!” Kyuhyun called back at Donghae.
“My heart! You took it! Give it back!“ he cried.
He had to get out of here. The creatures were chasing him into a dead end.
There was a tree up ahead; a tree with a door. Kyuhyun still couldn’t understand how the door moved about. He knocked on Eunhyuk insistently.
Eyunhyuk yawned, “Do you have the key?”
“No. But I need to get through now!” Kyuhyun said hurriedly, “You’re the Door! Unlock yourself.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” replied Eunhyuk, “How am I supposed to unlock myself. Of all the nonsense…”
Kyuhyun groaned.
“Don’t you ever listen?”
Kyuhyun looked up. Shindong looked down at him from his perch on a branch.
“Come again?”
“The left side will make you bigger and the other side will make you smaller,” Shindong replied, and twisted his eyes.
“The mushroom!” Kyuhyun looked down at his feet . There were several mushrooms all over the place. He needed to get small enough to get through the key hole and fast! Donghae and his creatures had almost caught up to him.
He picked a mushroom from the right side and ate it. He held onto Eunhyuk’s knob. He was shrinking.
“No! Kyuhyun, come back!” Kyuhyun heard Donghae cry out. He gave Donghae one last look before climbing through the key hole. His eyes were sad.
---
Kyuhyun woke up with a start. He was sitting under a tree not too far from his car. He jumped to his feet.
“My car!” he said in surprise. It was a bit different from when he first left it. The driver side door was open and the hood was up. And if he wasn’t mistaken there was someone working under the hood.
“Hey! Hey you! What are you doing to my car!” Kyuhyun ran over to the front to see a man leaning over his engine.
“Weren’t you the one who called a repairman?” said the guy, “If I don’t get paid for this, I’m gonna be mad. It’s wrong to steal.”
“Oh -uh, no,” said Kyuhyun, “I mean, I did call you. Thanks.”
“Well it’s all fixed now,” the repairman got up and turned to Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun’s eyes widened and he jumped back, “It’s you!”
“It is?” the man gave Kyuhyun a funny smile, “Do I know you?”
“You’re the Mad Prince of Hearts, Prince Donghae,” Kyuhyun said.
The repairman laughed, “You’ve been sleeping in the sun too long. What? Did you read my name tag or something?”
Kyuhyun looked at Donghae in confusion. What was going on?
“Hey look, my friend was running late for a date so he took my car. Mind giving me a lift to town?” Donghae asked, eyes twinkling.
“I -uh…” Kyuhyun hesitated, trying to gather his thoughts. Had it really all been a dream?
“No, not at all. Get in,” he said to Donghae.
“Great!” Donghae climbed in as Kyuhyun turn on the car. Pretty soon they were on the way into town.
“Hey, Kyuhyun,” Donghae said with a smile, “Wanna see a magic trick?”
-THE-END-
OMG SUE I LOVE YOU!! HAPPY (belated) BIRTHDAY!!! <3