poison
poison
r
kibum is definitely the most beautiful person that jonghyun has ever seen. it’s the first thing that runs through his mind every morning when he wakes up, and at least a thousand times before he goes to sleep. he doesn’t know what it is that fascinates him the most. maybe it’s the perfect shape of his cheekbones, or the way that kibum’s eyes are so catlike even without the slightest bit of eyeliner. maybe it’s his body, delicate and yet strong in a balance that he’s never seen before in his life.
it’s nothing like what he sees if he dares to look in a mirror. he hates the contrast, the difference. he hates his dark skin and sharp features, the way that his eyes are too large and his waist is too narrow. everything about him screams imperfection. looking at kibum is so much better. on his bad days he watches kibum apply his makeup in the mornings in awe, finding a strange and new kind of beauty in the way it glides onto his skin.
at first, kibum thinks it’s strange. he won’t deny that he’s flattered, and it’s nice whenever jonghyun takes over and applies his makeup for him. there’s something relaxing about it, and something special about having someone look at you with the kind of complete adoration that jonghyun has. he’s never been so pampered in his life, suddenly finding himself with at least one new outfit a week, always of the highest quality.
jonghyun doesn’t think about it. he doesn’t want to think about it, not about anything but how perfect it will be to see kibum in the newest outfit he saw downtown. it’s impulsive, but there’s nothing wrong with it. there’s nothing wrong with dressing kibum up and making sure that he always looks as gorgeous as he can. nothing should ever be out of place. and nothing ever will be, as long as jonghyun is around.
kibum realizes something is off whenever he cuts himself. it’s an accident, and he finds himself standing at the kitchen sink, running his bleeding hand under a stream of water.
“what happened?” jonghyun is in the doorway and kibum smiles, laughing it off with a shake of his head. “i was slicing up the vegetables for dinner, and--” he’s cut off because of how quickly jonghyun grabs onto his wrist, staring at the small wound as if kibum had just chopped of his entire arm. for the next hour he applies first aid creams, mumbling too quietly for kibum to understand what he’s saying. things go back to normal as soon as the scratch is healed, but something inside of kibum is uneasy.
jonghyun has a lot of bad days. it was easy to write off at first. he was just anxious, just stressed. there’s been a lot going on, maybe he isn’t feeling well. it’s been days since he’s seen jonghyun eat anything, but that doesn’t seem to concern him too much.
“i tried a new recipe.” kibum watches him carefully from across the table, not backing down until jonghyun takes two bites. “i’m sorry.” he smiles apologetically and pushes himself up from the table. “i just don’t have much of an appetite.”
things are getting better, on the surface. the uneasy feeling lingers but every day when kibum comes home from work the leftovers are gone. in a moment of what he’s sure is insanity he goes through the trash can, because he has to be sure. he doesn’t find anything. jonghyun has to be getting better. it must just be in his head. maybe nothing was wrong after all.
jonghyun is good at keeping secrets. he’s so good at them that he forgets they’re even there at all sometimes, and when he’s reminded it makes him anxious. he hates it. he hates the overdue notices that keep showing up on the door, and he shoves them away in a drawer. they’ll go away, he’s sure of it. besides, it’s not important. it’s not as important as the shirt he brought home for kibum. it can wait. it can always wait.
“jonghyun.” kibum breathes against his skin, his breath is warm and his hands are everywhere. jonghyun is tense, but kibum doesn’t seem to notice. “what do you want?” kibum laughs and tugs at the belt loops on his jeans, not registering how far from his body they pull. “i wanna fuck you.” he nibbles at his neck playfully, and jonghyun’s heart is pounding.
“are you gonna look at me?” the words are barely above a whisper, but they still make kibum stop and frown. “what?” jonghyun gives him a small smile and a shrug, like he’s embarrassed. “let’s leave the lights off?” kibum stares at him for a moment and then grins and tugs him into the bedroom. “you get more romantic every day.”
they don’t have forever. jonghyun knows that, but he doesn’t want to know it. instead, he maxes out his credit cards and manages to get his hands on a new one for a trip. he takes kibum to america because he knows he’s always wanted to visit. the whole time he’s fixing kibum’s hair or tugging at his clothes, and kibum figures it’s the traveling that’s spiked his anxiety. after all, everything is perfect. he couldn’t be happier.
it takes less than a minute for everything to fall apart. jonghyun meant to get there first, but kibum is faster. the eviction notice is right where he knew it would be and the look on kibum’s face is beautiful and the most horrible thing that jonghyun has ever seen. it doesn’t matter what he says. there’s nothing to say, because the drawer is full and there wouldn’t be enough space for this one anyway.
“kibum?” his voice is quiet enough to ignore, and kibum does. he’s packing his things and shaking so much that jonghyun can see it. kibum knows. and so does jonghyun. everything they’ve built here is a lie. but kibum is still so pretty. he’s leaving, but jonghyun won’t believe it. he doesn’t want to. he doesn’t remember the weight of something irreversible in his hand, either, but it’s there. but he does it. at least kibum stopped shaking.
he won’t leave. he’s not going to. a matter of minutes and everything is back to the way it should be. back to the way it was. jonghyun hums to himself while he cleans off the blood and applies kibum’s makeup. nothing should ever be out of place. because kibum is definitely the most beautiful person that jonghyun has ever seen.
so this is really weird and based off of an au that myself and my girl came up with. we do that a lot. she writes a fucking amazing key and 90% of my ideas for him come from her. let me know what you think c:
r
kibum is definitely the most beautiful person that jonghyun has ever seen. it’s the first thing that runs through his mind every morning when he wakes up, and at least a thousand times before he goes to sleep. he doesn’t know what it is that fascinates him the most. maybe it’s the perfect shape of his cheekbones, or the way that kibum’s eyes are so catlike even without the slightest bit of eyeliner. maybe it’s his body, delicate and yet strong in a balance that he’s never seen before in his life.
it’s nothing like what he sees if he dares to look in a mirror. he hates the contrast, the difference. he hates his dark skin and sharp features, the way that his eyes are too large and his waist is too narrow. everything about him screams imperfection. looking at kibum is so much better. on his bad days he watches kibum apply his makeup in the mornings in awe, finding a strange and new kind of beauty in the way it glides onto his skin.
at first, kibum thinks it’s strange. he won’t deny that he’s flattered, and it’s nice whenever jonghyun takes over and applies his makeup for him. there’s something relaxing about it, and something special about having someone look at you with the kind of complete adoration that jonghyun has. he’s never been so pampered in his life, suddenly finding himself with at least one new outfit a week, always of the highest quality.
jonghyun doesn’t think about it. he doesn’t want to think about it, not about anything but how perfect it will be to see kibum in the newest outfit he saw downtown. it’s impulsive, but there’s nothing wrong with it. there’s nothing wrong with dressing kibum up and making sure that he always looks as gorgeous as he can. nothing should ever be out of place. and nothing ever will be, as long as jonghyun is around.
kibum realizes something is off whenever he cuts himself. it’s an accident, and he finds himself standing at the kitchen sink, running his bleeding hand under a stream of water.
“what happened?” jonghyun is in the doorway and kibum smiles, laughing it off with a shake of his head. “i was slicing up the vegetables for dinner, and--” he’s cut off because of how quickly jonghyun grabs onto his wrist, staring at the small wound as if kibum had just chopped of his entire arm. for the next hour he applies first aid creams, mumbling too quietly for kibum to understand what he’s saying. things go back to normal as soon as the scratch is healed, but something inside of kibum is uneasy.
jonghyun has a lot of bad days. it was easy to write off at first. he was just anxious, just stressed. there’s been a lot going on, maybe he isn’t feeling well. it’s been days since he’s seen jonghyun eat anything, but that doesn’t seem to concern him too much.
“i tried a new recipe.” kibum watches him carefully from across the table, not backing down until jonghyun takes two bites. “i’m sorry.” he smiles apologetically and pushes himself up from the table. “i just don’t have much of an appetite.”
things are getting better, on the surface. the uneasy feeling lingers but every day when kibum comes home from work the leftovers are gone. in a moment of what he’s sure is insanity he goes through the trash can, because he has to be sure. he doesn’t find anything. jonghyun has to be getting better. it must just be in his head. maybe nothing was wrong after all.
jonghyun is good at keeping secrets. he’s so good at them that he forgets they’re even there at all sometimes, and when he’s reminded it makes him anxious. he hates it. he hates the overdue notices that keep showing up on the door, and he shoves them away in a drawer. they’ll go away, he’s sure of it. besides, it’s not important. it’s not as important as the shirt he brought home for kibum. it can wait. it can always wait.
“jonghyun.” kibum breathes against his skin, his breath is warm and his hands are everywhere. jonghyun is tense, but kibum doesn’t seem to notice. “what do you want?” kibum laughs and tugs at the belt loops on his jeans, not registering how far from his body they pull. “i wanna fuck you.” he nibbles at his neck playfully, and jonghyun’s heart is pounding.
“are you gonna look at me?” the words are barely above a whisper, but they still make kibum stop and frown. “what?” jonghyun gives him a small smile and a shrug, like he’s embarrassed. “let’s leave the lights off?” kibum stares at him for a moment and then grins and tugs him into the bedroom. “you get more romantic every day.”
they don’t have forever. jonghyun knows that, but he doesn’t want to know it. instead, he maxes out his credit cards and manages to get his hands on a new one for a trip. he takes kibum to america because he knows he’s always wanted to visit. the whole time he’s fixing kibum’s hair or tugging at his clothes, and kibum figures it’s the traveling that’s spiked his anxiety. after all, everything is perfect. he couldn’t be happier.
it takes less than a minute for everything to fall apart. jonghyun meant to get there first, but kibum is faster. the eviction notice is right where he knew it would be and the look on kibum’s face is beautiful and the most horrible thing that jonghyun has ever seen. it doesn’t matter what he says. there’s nothing to say, because the drawer is full and there wouldn’t be enough space for this one anyway.
“kibum?” his voice is quiet enough to ignore, and kibum does. he’s packing his things and shaking so much that jonghyun can see it. kibum knows. and so does jonghyun. everything they’ve built here is a lie. but kibum is still so pretty. he’s leaving, but jonghyun won’t believe it. he doesn’t want to. he doesn’t remember the weight of something irreversible in his hand, either, but it’s there. but he does it. at least kibum stopped shaking.
he won’t leave. he’s not going to. a matter of minutes and everything is back to the way it should be. back to the way it was. jonghyun hums to himself while he cleans off the blood and applies kibum’s makeup. nothing should ever be out of place. because kibum is definitely the most beautiful person that jonghyun has ever seen.
so this is really weird and based off of an au that myself and my girl came up with. we do that a lot. she writes a fucking amazing key and 90% of my ideas for him come from her. let me know what you think c: