KAT-TUN and DBSK fic-Fraternizing with the enemy
Title: Fraternizing with the enemy
Characters: KAT-TUN/DBSK (mostly Jin centric), others
Pairings: None, OT5, Jaemin, Jaeminho and Yoosu if you squint. Some Jaejin.
Rating: G
Summary: Jin’s impressions of DBSK after seeing them in Music Station
Disclaimer: If I owned them I would. Sadly only the plot is mine
1.Greetings
The first thing Jin notices is the perkiness of the guy in the silver jacket. Everything about him is so....perky. Even his butt (a nice one at that, though a bit on the girly side). The next thing is the beanpole next to him, smiling smugly as he watches the guy on the floor. Jin’s attention moves to said guy and his eyes widen at the shock of blond hair and feminine features which leads to the dubbing of “Asian Legolas with shorter hair aka. Elf.” Elf gets up and starts hitting Beanpole who smacks him on the arm, resulting in Elf tumbling to the floor. Again. The slightly shifty looking guy all in white bursts into loud guffaws and clutches Duck Butt’s arms. The last guy, the serious muscular one with a beanie strides over and drags Elf away from Beanpole as he attempts to claw out his eyes. As Elf turns on Beanie instead, Jin can’t resist the giggle that escapes and they all turn to look at him. Beanpole has one eyebrow raised, Duck Butt and Shifty look curious (but the gleam in Shifty’s eyes does not go unnoticed), Beanie looks puzzled and Elf looks interested. As they stare intensely at Jin the urge to run and hide grows and he backs away slowly, slowly, looking elsewhere and finally skywards as he crashed into a table yelping. As Duck Butt, Elf and Shifty roar with laughter, Jin escapes towards his band. Sulkily he thinks At least Beanpole and Beanie had been kind enough not to laugh without covering their mouth.
Jin watches them throughout their performance rather excitedly, they’re all good singers, no doubt about that. Kame fakes indifference, Koki looks unimpressed and the others don’t really care. Only Taguchi shows some interest. It’s strange to see that they’re all extremely good and could be front-men, yet they’ve all been grouped in one band. As their performance finishes and Koda Kumi grins at the camera they all look contentedly at each other as the cameraman signals “Cut!” The break between performances comes and Jin can’t help but draw closer to them and he feels his brain start to hurt as they tease each other in Korean. To him it sounds as if they’re whining….why couldn’t everyone in this world speak Japanese? It would be so much easier…Though English is a cool language too. Jin liked English. As Duck Butt sprays water from his bottle onto Elf, Shifty notices him watching on the side and offers a smile. Jin freezes, unsure what to do next.
“Hi?” comes out feebly.
“Hi,” replies Shifty in accented English and Jin grins. Someone else who speaks with an accent! By now the others have drifted towards them, all except Beanie who is talking to Koda. Duck Butt gives a radiant smile (Tegoshi has competition thinks Jin, and smiles inwardly); Beanpole smiles from where he has draped himself on Elf’s shoulders. Elf gives him a shy smile and Jin forgets to breathe as eyes look from beneath long lashes, ‘Dear God this guy is pretty,’ and pokes Beanpole’s hand.
“Um…your performance was really good. I err…..felt your energy.” Inside his head Jin was bashing himself against a wall. What the hell!?Now they were going to think he was on crack or something.
Shifty’s eyes grew as he stifled a laugh.
“Thanks. I’m Micky Yoochun.”
A hand was offered and in shook it hesitantly at first before pumping it up and down. Duck Butt turned out to be “Xiah Junsu”, Beanpole was “Max Changmin”, and Elf was “Hero Jaejoong.” Beanie was “U-Know Yunho.” Weird weird names. Up close Jin felt small. Very very small. Every single one of them was taller. Beanpole and Beanie were even taller than Junno. Jin decided that kimchi must have magical growth properties as since they were Korean they must eat Kimchi and therefore their height is all due to the wonderful dish of kimchi. He made a mental note to drag Pi and Ryo-chan for some next time they went out. Suggesting such a thing to Ueda would only lead to severe pain and a bruised arm whereas Ryo-chan only meant severe mental trauma.
“I’m Akanishi Jin. The ‘A’ in KAT-TUN, its made up of all our names you see, there’s Kamenashi, me, Tanaka, Tagu-…..” Stare. Giggle. Jin stopped rambling.
“…Pleased to meet you.” Respectful bowing followed. As Jin rose he could see Kame looking disapprovingly and he cringed at the look Koki shot him.
“Places everyone!”
Jin snapped back to attention and stumbled awkwardly away from them back towards his band. Jaejoong leaned on Changmin’s side, one arm playing lazily with his bandana.
“I think I like him.”
2. Living together in a non sexual way
As they all crowd around the water cooler after the show the topic of living space comes up.
“Oh, we all live together. Micky and I share a room and the other 3 share.”
“All of you? In one apartment? Sharing rooms?!”
The idea of living together with his band mates has never even crossed his mind. Sharing rooms has definitely not passed through. Kame would be no fun, Koki would play his loud gangsta music and scowl at him if he ever tried speaking English; Ueda would….suck his blood or something (Jin’s heard rumours from the Juniors. They know everything); Nakamaru would be boring and Taguchi was….Taguchi. Ew. Jaejoong gives a happy sigh as he looks at his band mates and pats Yunho’s arm.
“We’re perfectly content the way we are. We all sleep in one room back home. We’ve lived together for 4 years now, in Japan and Korea.”
This leads to a slight twitch in Jin’s eye, but surely Jaejoong didn’t mean it the way his mind saw it. Surely. Jaejoong catches his eye and smirks as Junsu smacks Micky’s butt. No freaking way.
3. I speak Engrish (I)
“A-P-P-L-E.”
“Correct,” Yoochun nods seriously, “Now spell your name.”
“X-I-A-H J-U-N-S-U,” Junsu beams as Yoochun nods.
“B-A-K-A……No wait, A-K-A-N-I-S-H-I J-I-N.”
4. Home and away
As Junsu talks of Brazil and shooting a PV there, so very far from home and friends, Jin’s mind wanders to L.A and freedom. Junsu left for a PV, Jin left because he was sick of home (or rather, wanted to learn English for 6 months by himself). The rest of the band narrates their time in Paris,
“Junsu-ah! Junsu-ah! We were so lonely!” Yoochun flings himself at Junsu who cackles happily Eunkyangkyang as the rest of the band crowd around him, Jaejoong imitating Micky’s cries of “Junsu-ah!”
“Eunkyangkyang…They missed me so much when I got off the bus they all molested me! Hahahaha eunkyangkyang!”
“Liar! All I did was carry your bag!” Junsu wiggles his eyebrows suggestively at Changmin. A beat. Changmin frowns.
“Actually, after this we need to finish our concert tour. Kuala Lumpur, Bangkok this year; next year Shanghai, Beijing, Hong Kong and back to Japan,” says Yunho.
“Don’t you need a break?” Jin blurts out. His nightly escapades to smoky clubs and bars, trysts with nameless girls and waking in hotel rooms come to mind. Changmin shakes his head.
“Going to foreign countries is a holiday for us. As long as we’re together we’ll have fun…being alone is just too lonely. Although we did do a drama about this once…”
Jin wonders whether Kame has ever taken a break. Ueda and Nakamaru take shorts trips together…Perhaps he could go with Pi? No, Pi’s too busy with NewS, the Kurosagi movie and his Proposal Daisakusen SP.
“Maybe next time we’re in Japan we should all go for a vacation,” suggests Jaejoong as Yunho loops an arm around his slender waist. Immediately the Micky and Junsu’s eyes brighten.
“Sapporo!”
“Okinawa!”
“Science Museum!”
Ok, freak is all Jin can think as he gapes at Changmin who stares defiantly back. Least the others seem to agree.
5. Family
“Well Jaejoong is the mother, Yunho is our father and we’re the sons!” Junsu explains.
“Wait….” Jin doesn’t get this at all, “You have 2 guys as your parents. That would mean you’re adopted right?”
Junsu’s brow creases in thought as he rubs his chin.
“Nooo, Jaejoong loves Yunho so much that we were created out of that love in a totally non-sexual way. Like stars!”
“Ahhhhh so you just appear! So when you love someone so much other people appear and complete you!”
“Yeah!” Both of them nod enthusiastically at each other. Off the side Changmin doesn’t bother to point out stars are created through the collapse of a cloud of material (containing hydrogen and helium among other things), resulting in an explosion that leaves only a dense core.The energy propels and generates a stellar wind. The star then evolves into a degenerate form, recycling a portion of the matter into the interstellar environment, where it will form a new generation of stars with a higher proportion of heavy elements. They probably wouldn’t understand.
As he continues nodding with Junsu (they even have a rhythm going) Jin has a brief thought of KAT-TUN as a family and vows never to think of it again. That was messed up.
6.Gayness
Later as Jin tries to explain to Ryo about his meeting, all he gets in response is a sneer.
“Jin, they’re clearly gay. They have fansites dedicated to certain pairings.”
“Well so do we!” Jin flails, “Wait, why do you know that?”
Ryo ignores him and continues on.
“Look at the way they behave around each other, the whole ‘family’ thing. That Jae guy and his ‘one touch’ with that beanstalk, him and the pimp looking one have that whole ‘soul mates’ thing. The guy with the large butt and the pimp have a big fanbase. There’s something going on between the mother and father I swear, who would willingly announce on radio they’re married? They way they behaved with each other on the couple talk…”
“What? When? I didn’t know they got married!? I wasn’t even invited! Couple talk?”
"On all the behind the scenes shoots and during concerts they're constantly touching each other! On the legs, the arms, hair....Hell, I'd never do that! The way Jaejoong rubbed against Yunho in the Red Sun PV filming and all that weird Dangerous something drama....seriously! How gay can you get?"
Rainbow coloured pants comes into Jin's mind but he says nothing.
"How do you know all this?" Ryo glares and stabs his steak. Jin understands.
“Their costumes…are so….” Jin gives Ryo a look.
“Ok, nevermind.”
7. I speak Engrish (II)
As Jin retells his experiences in America to Yoochun (who he has deemed cool and English speaking) they get onto the topic of girls. Yoochun leans forward.
“So, how did you pick up girls?”
Jin puffs up and grins.
“Yo, you are so gorgeous!”
“You really need to meet HeeChul,” is all Micky can say as he chokes on laughter.
A/N
The ‘Couple Talk’ is from the All About TVXQ Season 2 DVD.
Eunkyangkyang is the sound of Junsu’s laugh according to the other members.
Heechul is from Super Junior and to get the ‘gorgeous’ thing you should watch ‘Super Junior Full House’ XP. Total crack.