3 times Yoochun tries to ask Junsu out (and fails) and the one time he succeeds
Title: 3 times Yoochun tries to ask Junsu out and the one time he succeeds (aka Do it like the do on the Discovery Channel)
Characters: DBSK and Super Junior
Pairings: Yoosu, light Yunjaemin
Rating : PG?
Written after a pretty long hiatus…Their concert in Osaka was AWESOME. Yunho’s rooster hair just about killed me, especially when he did his counting gag. Junsu and Micky cried in Love in Ice….after vehemently denying crying in Proud last time. Someone-a guy-screamed Min’s name. XP.
“Hyung…”
Jaejoong continued to stir.
“Soul mate…”
Jaejoong took a sip. Hmm….needed a bit more chili.
“Jaejoong ah…”
Carefully he poured the soup into 5 bowls and garnished them with parsley.
“Umma…”
As an afterthought he added more peppers. And then more chili.
“HYUNG!”
Jaejoong finally turned around. Yoochun was draped pathetically over the couch, staring at him. Jaejoong blinked. Yoochun groaned. Jaejoong raised an eyebrow. Yoochun flailed weakly as he started to lose balance. Jaejoong waved. Yoochun kissed the ground.
“Is something wrong Yoochun-ah?”
Yoochun rolled over onto his back and whined.
“I keep dropping hints I like Junsu but he doesn’t get it.”
Jaejoong looked at him thoughtfully for a moment before speaking.
“Well, you do flirt with every living thing and break into random moments of utter greasiness. You also look like you want to ravish the camera at times.”
“Not helping hyung.”
“Well I’m cooking,” replied Jaejoong, “So why don’t you try doing that for him.”
“Because,” said Yoochun with a sigh, “I’m utterly useless. I can’t even cook instant ramen without over boiling the noodles. I gave Changmin food poisoning the last time I made him a sandwich. Changmin. The black hole.”
Jaejoong smiled optimistically and dragged him into the kitchen.
“I’m sure we’ll be able to fix that, nobody is that useless. Let’s start with something simple, say, an omelet.”
Junsu, Changmin and Yunho returned to find the apartment evacuated with plumes of black smoke billowing out of their apartment. Their neighbours (mostly made of Super Junior) glared/stared at them in varying degrees of annoyance as their manager carried out various methods of damage control towards the press. Jaejoong sat staring desolately into space, hands nervously clutching his ladle whilst Yoochun felt the empty space where his eyebrows once were. Changmin cackled in glee.
“His forehead’s even bigger now!” He and Junsu burst into peals of laughter.
Yunho felt a migraine coming on.
1. The way to a man’s heart is through food
After a week of begging, flattering and kissing Jaejoong’s ass, he finally agreed to let Yoochun re-enter the kitchen. One hour later, a simple dinner of pasta had been cooked (though the linguini looked slightly limp much to Jaejoong’s distress) and the table had been nicely laid out (by Changmin who’d emerged for food and got “one-touch” love in return).
“Now,” instructed Jaejoong, “All you have to do is but this waffle batter,” he motioned to the bowl, “Into the waffle maker and close it. The time should go off when it’s done. I have placed a variety of sauces for you on the counter and there is ice cream in the fridge. And please,” he gave a look of utter helplessness, “Please be careful. In fact, use oven mitts! Wear goggles when pouring in the mix! Don’t spill water ok Chunnie, DON’T spill water because we all know water does not go well with electricity,”
His voice had risen an octave higher,
“and you could get an electric shock and thenthewholeapartmentwouldbeburntagainandthenandthenwe’llgetkickedoutandIwon’thavemylovelykitchenandthen”
Wordlessly Yunho dragged Jaejoong out of the kitchen and into the car where a waiting Changmin used his superior height and strength to restrain Jaejoong from rushing back in.
“PARK YOOCHUN YOU BETTER NOT RUIN THE HOUSE AGAIN OR I SWEAR I’LL TEAR OUT YOUR BA-”
The car sped out of the driveway with a screech. Yoochun let out a breath.
“I’m back!” yelled Junsu, “And I kicked Hyuk Jae’s sorry ass too!”
Yoochun inhaled that breath and started to cough loudly. Oh God.
Two hours later and dinner was over and they sat in awkward silence, neither looking at the other. Damn these candles, thought Micky, They’re not helping at all! Oh God oh God…he looks so adorable in the candlelight with those big round eyes and…
As his mind replayed Lady and the Tramp, various scenarios involving Junsu and spaghetti, and for some reason, Jaejoong and spaghetti; Junsu spoke.
“Um… so where are the others again?”
“Err..Yunho said Jaejoong needed a break and so he and Changmin took him out to see a movie. With food. Yeah, food, that’s why I cooked tonight for us. For you. Me. I. We….er….”
The return of the awkward silence. Their clock ticked monotonously on the wall. Damnit say something!
“Dessert! Do you feel like waffles?!” he cried out. Junsu broke into a beaming smile. Yoochun resisted the urge to kiss him by holding the table.
“Sure!”
With skill (somewhat) and practiced ease (Jaejoong had drilled him that whole afternoon), he poured the batter into the waffle machine and closed it. Junsu’s eyes were focused on the machine, as the smell of hot waffles soon filled the air.
“I can’t wait to pour syrup all over it!”
I can’t wait to pour syrup all over you.
“And ice cream! I saw ice cream in the fridge!”
And then I’ll add ice cream and lick it off slowly.
“Do we have any cherries? Those three better not have used them all!”
I’d like to pop your cherry-gah, stop it brain, stop it!
The timer dinged and he lifted them out onto a plate. Junsu yelped as his fingers grazed the still hot waffle iron, tears beginning to form. Yoochun quickly grabbed the wounded fingers and sucked them gently. Junsu shivered and looked down into his eyes. Yoochun looked away but continued to suck, the tip of his tongue flicking over the digits teasingly. Junsu moaned softly and Yoochun stopped suddenly and turned away to continue extracting the waffles. Junsu came closer, so close he could feel the others body heat emanating from beneath the light shirt. Yoochun froze and turned around to face him. Junsu’s eyes shone with something and he was coming closer and closer, making Yoochun step backwards until he was pressed against the counter, hands sliding back.
“Junsu I…I really…Junsu-AHHHHHHHH!”
Later, when the others came home they saw a badly bandaged Yoochun whimpering into the couch as Junsu gave him more ice packs to hold. Seeing the others looking at them questioningly Junsu answered.
“He got his hand stuck in the waffle iron.”
2. Do what he likes to do
So far they’d played football since 8 (whereby Yoochun still wasn’t fully conscious and was woken up rather savagely by the ball hitting his head), gone to the aquarium (and were chased out by rabid fans after Junsu squealed and the dolphins squealed back ), and they were now in an arcade. At 2 in the morning. Yoochun wanted nothing better than to curl up somewhere and sleep. For some inane reason, the Jaehomin had tagged along at Junsu’s request- “To protect his purity,” said Changmin- and were now engaged in a fierce battle of Tekken, Yunho and Changmin versus Jaejoong. Yoochun wasn’t sure what the prize was or why they were trying so hard, but he had an idea why Jaejoong was from what he screamed out. What he really knew was that he never, ever, wanted to play Dance Dance Revolution again and that he seriously hated Japanese techno-pop. He shouldn’t have listened to Hyuk Jae when he said follow Junsu around. The guy had years of experience and way more stamina. Yoochun had 4 years and a non-existent stamina (reflexes didn’t count-that was self preservation). The sheer fact he couldn’t get past beginner’s level on DDR and failed to win the Lion King Gameboy game proved that.
“I AM NOT THE GIRL!”
“You cook, you clean. You’re like a Korean Martha Stewart. But sexier.”
“Among other things,” muttered Yunho as his character got slammed into the wall.
“THAT’S WHAT’S COMING TO YOU TONIGHT! KISS MY PRETTY ASS!”
“EEEEEEEE! DIE DIE DIE!” shrieked Junsu as he shot the gigantic spiders. Blood splattered all over the screen, mixed with green gunk and Junsu slumped against the machine in defeat before-
“Let’s play DDR again! This time we’ll try advanced level!”
That night he dreamt he was in atop the Great Wall of China whilst slime oozing spiders danced along to Captain Jack’s remix and Jaejoong slammed Yunho and Changmin against walls.
3. The tried and trusted method
Yunho caught him sulking in the dance studio whilst the others took a water break and firmly steered him to a corner and sat him down.
“Now Yoochun,” he began, adopting his best Leader-shi voice, reserved for appearances, little children, and disciplining Jaejoong.
“I’ve been watching you these past few days and I can see you’re deeply frustrated,” he glanced at his crotch here and Yoochun blushed, “In more ways than one and I’m fed up of you creating a dead aura in the house. I know you’re trying your best but nothing’s working so I decided to take initiative and do something myself.”
A flame of hope ignited itself in Yoochun’s heart and he gazed up at Yunho hopfully.
“Yes hyung?”
Yunho gave a confident smile.
“You’re going to the movies!”
Yoochun cheered inwardly.
“When?”
“Tonight. Jae, Min and I are going out with Kang In and Eeteuk and won’t be back until late.”
What Yunho didn’t mention, was that he’d arranged for them to go next door in the Super Junior apartment to join in on their movie night since he’d forgotten to buy tickets. Changmin thought it necessary to comment on this as they made their way out, Jaejoong hanging on both their arms petulantly whilst trying to kick Kang In.
“Hyung, you do realize it’s not really romantic when there are other people around. Especially” his gaze shifted to Kangteuk who were now being chased by Jaejoong and throwing leaves at him, “Super Junior. Especially since they know what’s going on. They’re not going to be really subtle about it.”
Yunho gave a nonchalant shrug and continued to chew his candy bar.
“I made them promise not to give it away. Kang In threatened bodily harm and to paint Sungmin’s room black. They’ll be fine.”
Changmin believed their promises to be good even less then he believed they were sane.
“Yes but hyung, what about your choice of movie?”
“What about it?”
“You chose Titantic.”
“So? It’s a romantic movie.”
“Titantic. This is Yoochun and Junsu we’re talking about here.”
“…Oh.”
They returned home earlier than expected (Jaejoong scolding Yunho over movie choice, Changmin readying himself for what was to come) and a furious Hee Chul launched himself at Yunho and began to shriek very, very loudly whilst Si won gestured rapidly for them to run away.
“You could’ve picked a different movie, but no, you picked Titanic!”
Yunho held his hands up in defense and backed away.
“I thought you guys liked Titanic too!”
Hee Chul threw a cushion at him.
“Yeah, but we’re not babies like those two! We’ve been babysitting them for hours! Si won has been reciting the damn Bible to them and Han Kyung breaks into freaking mandarin when he’s panicking. Ki Bum abandoned us three hours ago and they’ve only just stopped crying. THEY ARE NOT COMING FOR MOVIE NIGHT EVER AGAIN.”
Hee Chul shoved Yunho out of the way and stomped across the 5 metre gap separating their dorms and slammed the door. Micky and Junsu lay sniffling in a heap of pillows piled up beside the couch. Han Kyung was telling them a story in garbled Korean about a drunken monk and Si Won was patting their heads softly. Eun Hyuk looked traumatized.
“They’ve both stopped crying so they should be fine. Oh, and I think Eun Hyuk has gone into shock from seeing Junsu cry a river but he’ll be fine, it’s all just one big test that he must complete.” Si won smiled reassuringly.
Ryeowook looked distressed.
“They cried within the first few minutes. Yoochun burst into tears when the ship left harbor and that started Junsu off too.”
“What?! And you call yourselves men!” scoffed Jaejoong, folding his arms. Everyone gave him a pointed look which he ignored.
“Hyung, you don’t understand! All those people were going to die! Rose and Jack were going to be separated even though they were destined for each other! Destined!” Yoochun’s eyes were red and his nose was runny. Junsu continued to be a shaking ball on the pillows.
“Anyways,” Si won picked Eun Hyuk up and handed him over to Ryeowook who led him away, “We’ll be going now since you are all back. Good night.”
Super Junior trooped out leaving DBSK alone.
“Well, we’re all going to die anyway,” said Changmin bluntly.
Yoosu burst into fresh tears and Junsu wailed as Yoochun buried his face into the pillows.
Jaejoong and Yunho glared at him.
“What? I heard reverse psychology was supposed to help.”
4. Do it like they do on the discovery channel
“Hyung.”
A sliver of drool ran down his chin.
“Hyung.”
Eyes stared blankly into nothingness.
“HYUNG!”
Tumbleweeds rolled through the brain.
“YAH! PARK YOOCHUN!”
Changmin kicked him and Yoochun was flung unceremoniously off the table and onto the floor.
“OW! WHAT THE HELL MIN!? I HAVE ENOUGH INJURIES ALREADY!”
Changmin snorted and aimed another kick. Yoochun’s reflexes kicked in and he twisted out of the way at sonic speed…And hit the wall. Changmin grinned.
“I hate the Universe.”
“You know hyung…You really ought to watch more educational programmes. You might learn some interesting things.”
A grunt.
“Things that may help you get into-, no, get with Junsu hyung.”
An interested look.
Seeing he had his interest Changmin continued.
“Did you know dolphins are gay for part of their life? And that they are the only animals other than us, who have sex for pleasure?”
That was all it took.
“You could’ve waited for a better time to tell him than tonight,” grumbled Jaejoong as he sat on Changmin’s lap, flicking through his fansites, “Like when we weren’t home.”
Sounds of pleasure echoed through the house, the headboard hitting the wall striking a constant rhythm.
“Namo, Namo, Amita-” Yunho stopped himself as he realized what he was saying and cranked up the volume louder on his headphones.Edit: The sequel to this, "Vowels" is up.