Comments | cmdrtekk: One Night, One Vorn Part 2

cmdrtekk

One Night, One Vorn Part 2

Apr 30, 2011 17:44

According to the Lj error message the Story was to big for one post, here is the rest.

( One Night, One Vorn - Part 2 )

smokescreen, community challenge response, prowl, jazz, jazz/prowl

Comments 16

gatekat May 1 2011, 01:40:40 UTC

Very cool story. I really like the variants you used here with Jazz's 'birth' rank, the detail on pre-programmed mech life/laws, and how Prowl crashed learning he was free. I love the culture you built up here. Very good work.

cmdrtekk May 1 2011, 16:08:54 UTC

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I am relieved all the background detail worked out.

d_lueth May 1 2011, 02:49:46 UTC

XD Go Jazz!

I about died laughing when jazz explained his ancestry to Prowl :D Trust Jazz to make things complicated. Thanks for making me smile :)

cmdrtekk May 1 2011, 16:10:30 UTC

Glad to here it worked, it felt right for Jazz's personality to describe it that way. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.

renegadewriter8 May 1 2011, 03:00:51 UTC

Great fic! I loved this, really liked how Jazz and Prowl met and the spark sync was awesome. Awww but now I hope Smokey finds someone and is set free. =)

cmdrtekk May 1 2011, 16:14:53 UTC

The spark sync gave me fits actually, and I still I'm not pleased with how it conveyed. The idea behind it I'm fine with - it's pretty sound in my head, my conveyance in writing how it works, I wasn't as pleased with. But apparently it worked. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. It is appreciated.

mmouse15 May 1 2011, 03:34:30 UTC

I really like the world you've created here and all the details you put into Prowl's world.

Jazz's explanation of his lineage seemed very typically convoluted of him, and I'll admit I LOL'd at it.

I liked the way Prowl had a vorn to get used to being free and Jazz had to stay away from him for that vorn. That was a nifty touch to the story.

I loved the story! Thanks for sharing it, it was a wonderful story to read tonight.

cmdrtekk May 1 2011, 16:21:32 UTC

Thank you. I was pretty pleased with this world as I wrote it and all the little aspects that I manged to drag out in this amount of space. I am both satisfied and frustrated with how much and how little was explored. I appreciate your taking the time to read and comment.

(The comment has been removed)

cmdrtekk May 1 2011, 16:21:53 UTC

Thank you.