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[colette_trudeau]

Shakira's update really got me thinking.

I know I've never exactly spoken to her, but some of the points she made were really depressing to me in a few ways. She stated, "I think that there are basically people who cheat and people who don't. The ethics of cheating are kind of built into a person, it's not something you decide." and sadly, I'll

Comments

[aaronxescolopio]

you're not an idiot

[lavigne]

i think it is pretty normal to feel that way. i don't know if you should go by me because i am kind of dumb when it comes to relationships. but i think it is unhealthy and pretty much impossible to be completely tied down to one person, to the point where you can't even find someone else attractive. i think expecting that from someone is asking way too much and if anything it should chase them in the other direction. i am not condoning cheating but sometimes you need to do something drastic to make sure you're where you want to be. pretend that made sense. i have no idea what i am talking about. this comment is not helping at all sorry bye!

[ex_shakira_]

for some reason i am just now seeing this. i do the same thing. except i end up cheating.

[valo]

Well, first of all, I can't really agree with your quote of Shakira's. Cheating is a choice. Seduction only works when the person being seduced actually gives in. And I don't believe that there is a genetic code that makes you cheat. I also don't believe in fate.

Now, I do believe that complete faithfulness is overrated, but then what we are really talking about is the scope of faithfulness... because hugging, kissing, even fucking, are not cheating if you state the boundaries clearly. One single person can hardly fulfill all your needs... one single person can be a great listener, fun and funny to be around, and a great lover - but you will still feel like you're missing out, if you never even go out and have a drink with somebody else. Or maybe attend a party or whatever. The more you feel guilty about thinking of someone else, the more urgent your needs outside the relationship become, at least that's what I get out of my experience.

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